- Freedom : I'm not sure what it has to do with anything, how do you define freedom in the first place? Why is that that living alone means freedom more than with others people? I don't feel like constrained in freedom in any way in my current situation, I'm doing what I want, coming back and leaving when I want, going where I want and so on
- Life experience : I do agree on that one, however that doesn't mean living by yourself should be the aim for everyone in the end, what's "expected" of us is to have our own family later on anyway. If anything living by yourself is a waste of money (both for you and for others because that contributes to higher house/rent prices) if there are no advantages in terms of commute or things to do next to your home
- Dating : that's the biggest valid point
- Privacy : Like freedom I see no problem on that front either
- Social life : Talking about a personal case here but most of my friends are in the big city while l'm living/working in the suburbs 1h commute from their home, so yeah they won't come to my house often (they already did though), even if I rent my own place that still wouldn't be convenient and the size of the flat wouldn't be worth it on top of it (don't think I could afford much more than 30-40m²). Outside of that I'm hanging out just fine and living with my parents has no impacts whatsoever on that
- Relief for your parents : It's actually quite the opposite and I've talked to them about that multiple times to be sure
- Post shower naked strolls : I'm actually... doing that almost, just a towel to hide the weenie and that's it, my father does it too and we are pretty cool with that. Overall I'm alright with my naked body in many circumstances lol (I'm an onsen lover)
Maybe I'm missing things here and there so anyone can feel free to explain them to me, but imo it has more to do with your relationship with your family and how you live as an individual overall,.
I'm not some lazy ass that comes back at home put his ass on a chair waiting for dinner, go sit my ass in front of a computer, ignore my parents, ask them for money, get yelled at for being noisy at night when I come back drunk (which can happen) and so on, we are in a mutual relationship of trust and help and I'm very happy for that, it is much better than the classic relationship that I heard from friends often which is just a "oh yeah they exist" about their parents.
If anything I'm here to contribute to improvement in the house, lately I've also reminded my parents how before they used to say that they would go back to the area where they grew up (hundreds of km from where we are) and I like them entertaining the idea of doing that after my father finish his 42y of hard work, and I'm pretty adamant that I shouldn't be in any way a factor that prevents them from doing what they want (which, ironically, I am because of our good relationship to begin with)
But yeah I feel like in our, western, societies there are some huge pillars that are hard to move and it's just unthinkable to do without them and of course it happens I that I'm checking the boxes for most (casual alcohool drinking, be in a relationship/date, live by yourself, eat meat) :p
If you're happy and your parents are happy, then that's the crux of it, but the 20-30 block is a huge formative period, and I personally feel like you're missing out on developing in some really key areas if you stay at home.
- Freedom : I'm not sure what it has to do with anything, how do you define freedom in the first place? Why is that that living alone means freedom more than with others people? I don't feel like constrained in freedom in any way in my current situation, I'm doing what I want, coming back and leaving when I want, going where I want and so on
Living alone means you're free to do whatever in your own private space, even change that space. Moving into a place and setting it up with your things, eking out your own space/style/preferences in every corner is very different from your bedroom (is this your childhood bedroom as well?). It's your space to decorate and also your responsibility, and that responsibility is part of your development. Handling issues (damage, plumbing, wiring), taking care of upkeep, upgrading areas, being responsible for maintaining it (cleaning and such), are all valuable learning experiences. I'm sure you help at home, but that's not the same as being responsible fr your own place.
Freedom to have people over, stay over, come in and out at all hours, blast music, etc. is stuff you can have when living with your parents...after you ask. Doing things without needing to ask permission, no matter how amiable your folks or generous their rules is not insignificant. It means you're not a kid any more (in that way), basically.
- Life experience : I do agree on that one, however that doesn't mean living by yourself should be the aim for everyone in the end, what's "expected" of us is to have our own family later on anyway. If anything living by yourself is a waste of money (both for you and for others because that contributes to higher house/rent prices) if there are no advantages in terms of commute or things to do next to your home
It's a personal choice, and again, if you're content enough, do what you like, but I find it really strange how everyone seems so determined to avoid any hardship? risk? these days. The life experience you get from living alone isn't just about pluses (freedom, privacy, etc.), it's about being exposed to, well, life: paying bills, doing all your own cooking, shopping, managing your place, dealing with responsibilities and learning how to navigate shit. The biggest value in leaving your parents' place is the struggle, imo. I suppose it doesn't as appealing as buying a house at 30, but holy hell you learn a lot.
Dating : that's the biggest valid point
On the flipside, you might end up starting late in dating, but you'll be well situated. That's very attractive to partners too.
Privacy : Like freedom I see no problem on that front either
Not even in regards to sex? I mean, my husband's cousin lived with his mom till he was 28 and didn't feel a lick of embarrassment bringing home different women every week and having her see them off with a coffee in the morning, so maybe you're cool with that, but I'd be weirded out if a date/BF told me we'd have to potentially pass his Grandma on the way to knock booties (no boots, too much noise).
Social life : Talking about a personal case here but most of my friends are in the big city while l'm living/working in the suburbs 1h commute from their home, so yeah they won't come to my house often (they already did though), even if I rent my own place that still wouldn't be convenient and the size of the flat wouldn't be worth it on top of it (don't think I could afford much more than 30-40m²). Outside of that I'm hanging out just fine and living with my parents has no impacts whatsoever on that
I was a fair distance from a lot of my friends too, but having our own places meant we'd just take turns hosting dinner parties or movie nights or game stuff, and they'd all just crash overnight (and vice-versa). I think having your own place is great for social stuff, but you're right that it's not the end all be all if you guys are meeting up just fine as is.
Post shower naked strolls : I'm actually... doing that almost, just a towel to hide the weenie and that's it, my father does it too and we are pretty cool with that. Overall I'm alright with my naked body in many circumstances lol (I'm an onsen lover)
Towel definitely doesn't count. I'm an onsen lover too, but I'd never feel comfortable parading naked around the house with my parents or grandmother there, as you don't seem to either.
Anyway, I doubt anyone thinks you're some lazy moocher. It sounds like you have a nice relationship and value that closeness plus it helps them out, so it's not like you've overstayed your welcome or anything. You can certainly carry on and it does seem very practical to continue to save while you can. I guess you just have to decide when you think the value of the experiences you might potentially be missing outweighs the benefits of the current situation. I'm sure you'll do fine either way you go, though. Good luck~
