I did something similar. It's like you said: case-by-case. If I were looking to buy my house today, with its market value and interest rates being what they are, it'd be a shock to the finances.
But, my definition of "afford" might be a bit more conservative than other folks. Like, I'm not looking to have my ass beat by a mortgage to the point that I'm scrutinizing every other bill/expense I have, and forgoing savings/retirement in order to make it work. Throw in the prospect of having kids one day, and there's nothing less appealing to me than a 3k+ mortgage payment.
Agreed. And I could never afford the house I own today, or any house really. My "starter" house (I hate that term) is my forever house.