Would you rather fight a cheetah, a wolf, or a chimpanzee?
- Thread starter Leclair
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For real at that point you're picking the animal who you hope would kill you the quickest.
And probably another animal I'd argue would be more hard to deal with than cheetahs: swans.
And anteaters with their hug of death.
And another special mention, but no herbivores? I can mention a lot that would be more dangerous than even a wolf.
And anteaters with their hug of death.
And another special mention, but no herbivores? I can mention a lot that would be more dangerous than even a wolf.
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Cheetah. They don't even have good claws. They sacrificed being able to retract their claws to make them better at gripping the ground, which makes them dull as far as feline claws go. All you have to worry about with the cheetah is the mouth. They also have low endurance and low agility. You might have to sacrifice an arm, but it should be entirely possible to stay alive for the duration.
Also, I like my chances of befriending the cheetah.
Wolves have more attitude and endurance than cheetahs, so you're less likely to be able to intimidate or outlast it.
A chimpanzee with tear off your genitals and eat your face, or maybe the other way around. The 92 people (at this point) who voted for chimpanzee are idiots.
Anacondas are basically big muscle ropes with nothing good to grab onto.
Hippos are the deadliest of Africa's big five.
Also, I like my chances of befriending the cheetah.
Wolves have more attitude and endurance than cheetahs, so you're less likely to be able to intimidate or outlast it.
A chimpanzee with tear off your genitals and eat your face, or maybe the other way around. The 92 people (at this point) who voted for chimpanzee are idiots.
If it were a leopard, then I'd go with wolf. Leopards have more dangerous claws and are strong enough to carry their prey up trees. A wolf isn't as bad as that.
Crocodile, easily. They very rarely attack anything in the water, preferring to attack at the water's edge. If you end up fighting them at the water's edge, the muscles that open their jaws are quite weak. They also have terrible endurance. If, and I admit that it's a big if, but if you could jump on their backs and hold on for like thirty seconds while they roll around, the fight would be over in your favor.
Anacondas are basically big muscle ropes with nothing good to grab onto.
Hippos are the deadliest of Africa's big five.
Also fun fact. A few months ago I ran some ChatGPT scenarios of an adult Chimp going up against The Mountain from Game of Thrones.
The Chimp was predicted to win 90% of the time. Even against an armored Mountain. The only time the Mountain had a chance to win was when he was allowed to use his sword AND fill platemail armor.
The Chimp was predicted to win 90% of the time. Even against an armored Mountain. The only time the Mountain had a chance to win was when he was allowed to use his sword AND fill platemail armor.
My mum used to work in a zoo, specifically with monkeys/apes. She didn't get to properly fight any of them, but she does to this day has a scar from a bite of annoyed 3 yrs old baby chimp. It escaped and she tried to grab it but it was so springly it would keep getting away.
Adult chimp would sometimes manage to grab the broom she was cleaning floors with. She and her coworker, two grown women, would try to wrestle the broom back by hanging on it with all their weight, the chimp would be holding it with one hand while hanging off his cage, until chimp would get bored and simply snatch the broom away, quickly break it to pieces (solid wood), and start throwing at them.
An orangutan (admittedly stronger animal than a chimp) once pinned her friend's hand to the bar with one finger and they couldn't pull her away until orangutan got distracted.
I assume they have much higher pain tolerance so good luck with that as well.
Adult chimp would sometimes manage to grab the broom she was cleaning floors with. She and her coworker, two grown women, would try to wrestle the broom back by hanging on it with all their weight, the chimp would be holding it with one hand while hanging off his cage, until chimp would get bored and simply snatch the broom away, quickly break it to pieces (solid wood), and start throwing at them.
An orangutan (admittedly stronger animal than a chimp) once pinned her friend's hand to the bar with one finger and they couldn't pull her away until orangutan got distracted.
I assume they have much higher pain tolerance so good luck with that as well.
People who are picking the monkey are out of their minds.
I'd probably go for the Cheetah as it's the smaller than a wolf.
I'd probably go for the Cheetah as it's the smaller than a wolf.
Dr Forester I implore you to heed the words of your colleague Dr Mario:
A cat is nothing to trifle with, and keep in mind all three of these choices are equally weighted at 130lbs. 130lbs for a dog is pretty damn big, but 130lbs for a cat is gigantic.
Anything but the chimp. I feel like apes and bears are the deadliest mammals other than the terrifying hippos.
Well to be fair, you have a better chance of dealing with a bear than either of those animals. Black bear, just make noise and make yourself bigger. Grizzlies, just be in a fetal position or perhaps back away slowly or stand your ground. Polar bears meanwhile are entirely different story though.
And yeah can't underestimate hippos; dangerous on both water and land.
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Is it a guarantee that the animal will be aggressive? Out of those 3, I feel like if you just stay calm the wolf would be the least likely to even attack you for 2 minutes.
Big big dog. Just hey hi cute buddy hello sweet boy and give it some pets.
Big big dog. Just hey hi cute buddy hello sweet boy and give it some pets.
I don't think the wolf of cheetah are likely to try and attack a person. The chimp will rip your balls off for fun. It would also be the slowest death.
The wolf is big, but is also a pack hunter and dog like behaviors I'd be used to. I'm also not worried about a wolf's claws compared to the cheetah that will dig deep into your skin.
The wolf is big, but is also a pack hunter and dog like behaviors I'd be used to. I'm also not worried about a wolf's claws compared to the cheetah that will dig deep into your skin.
This is what a cheetah's claws look like
They aren't gutting anyone.
House cat claws are significantly sharper because they retract and they naturally use them as a primary weapon. Neither of these things is true of cheetahs.
For comparison, this what proper big cat claws, the kind that will gut you, look like:
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Cheetahs are surprisingly terrible at actually being dangerous, so I guess a cheetah.
Wouldn't want to fight any of them and I'm definitely not coming out of that fight in good shape, but at least I'll be coming out of it…
Ive been up close and personal with a wolf before and they're absolutely gigantic for something that only weighs in that same general ball park. And while their claws aren't particularly dangerous (still wouldn't want to test that), they have amazing reach with those teeth.
Not to mention I'd just generally feel terrible if I ever killed a wolf or a cheetah.
Wouldn't want to fight any of them and I'm definitely not coming out of that fight in good shape, but at least I'll be coming out of it…
Ive been up close and personal with a wolf before and they're absolutely gigantic for something that only weighs in that same general ball park. And while their claws aren't particularly dangerous (still wouldn't want to test that), they have amazing reach with those teeth.
Not to mention I'd just generally feel terrible if I ever killed a wolf or a cheetah.
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None are good options, but I'd take on a wolf before I would a large cat or chimp anyday. I'd probably still die, but at least I'd have a fighting chance.
It's definitely not the chimp - they're fucking maniacs and I would not want to be locked in a cage with one.
I still think the remaining two would mess me up, but among larger cats the cheetah is less threatening than its peers (their claws are shit). A wolf is terrifying in comparison.
I'll take the cheetah without much hesitation.
I still think the remaining two would mess me up, but among larger cats the cheetah is less threatening than its peers (their claws are shit). A wolf is terrifying in comparison.
I'll take the cheetah without much hesitation.
Cheetahs claws are not like other felines because those claws would suck at high speeds for turning. They got claws like dogs or.. wolves. The cheetah can literally only bite too but they're smaller than wolves and much less muscular, their rips look like they would break with a single punch lol. Cheetahs suck. They only get to eat a third of what they hunt because every other animal scares them away. An average adult cheetah weighs less than 60kg on the top end. Thats like your average 12 year old human male or something. And again that's the top end. The lower end is 35kg.. choosing wolf over cheetah is the objectively wrong answer, there is zero debate to be had.
Leopards are 60kg on the somewhat lower end. Cheetahs are 60kg on the high end and that's already stretching it, google say 54, leopards are like twice the size in practice. But look at that thing, it's so much muscle, on the other hand you can almost count the rips on a cheetah, they have very little muscle outside their legs, leopards and other big cats are built like trucks. That guy could take a beating. How many kicks or punches to the ribs could a cheetah take? Not many.Just curious. Those of you who picked the cheetah: Would you have voted different had it been a leopard? (still 60kg/130lbs)
I've read enough articles about chimps ripping peoples faces off to know that wasn't the right answer.
I've never fought a leopard, but I'm gonna go out on a limb and say if you're unarmed: a leopard that is determined to kill you is gonna kill you. I can't think if any situation I'd be confident in; even if you started the fight on it's back with a body triangle and choke sunk in, I don't think you have the strength to keep it from destroying you. In short bursts, cats are *insanely* strong animals.
That's what i'm saying. Leopards are beasts compared to cheetahs.
You take that back!
Cheetahs were actually kept as pets going as far back as Ancient Egypt since they're easily tamed.
So yeah, befriending a cheetah wouldn't be out of the realm of possibilities. They're chill af.
Chimpanzee out of that list. The other two are very fast and have very sharp teeth and claws.
Feel like I could out maneuver a Chimpanzee.
Feel like I could out maneuver a Chimpanzee.
I dunno about you, but I can't imagine how I'd be outmaneuvering anything that essentially has 4 hands.
Yeah, I don't think I'd feel safe even around a "friendly" or well-trained chimp.