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The UK’s controversial porn block will go into effect on July 15th

Deleted member 30411

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Deleted member 888

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Ash735 said:
Just to further point out, all MPs and Politicians are exempt from being included in this, it's like they want to be extremely obvious.
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Of course, they are. The Tories are busy snorting coke off prostitutes tits and paying to be pegged up the ass whilst sitting in parliament proclaiming it's the general public who are immoral and parents can't look after their kids internet.

Time to spam these to May/Boris

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impingu1984

impingu1984

Member
Oct 31, 2017
3,424
UK
It won't work.... It's been pushed back and amended to try and get around some of the impracticality of the original proposal...

I'm almost certain it get pushed back again in July until they just give up on it.

If not, it doesn't matter it will be easy to get round...

Utterly pointless
 

Deleted member 888

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The government claims the new regulations are "backed by 88% of UK parents with children aged 7-17," but given that "more than half of Britons watch online pornography" this could be a case of being careful what you wish for. The legislation, part of the Digital Economy Act of 2017, has been some time in the making. It has been delayed, but not by as much as was assumed, and will now hit the PCs, tablets and phones of the 56% of porn-watching Britons from July 15.
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https://www.forbes.com/sites/zakdof...sastrous-age-and-id-checks-on-all-porn-sites/

So a majority of the country watches porn. Where was the referendum for this, eh?

Porn is most people's dirty little secret. The fact it's viewed, when and where it's viewed, and of course what exactly is searched for and viewed per individual could become a catastrophic data set if breached or hacked. If you're concerned about Facebook, Marriott or British Airways breaches, imagine a YouPorn or PornHub breach. None of this strays into the territory of illegal content, but Jim Killock, Executive Director of Open Rights Group, said in a statement that "data leaks could be disastrous. And they will be the government's own fault. The government needs to shape up and legislate for privacy before their own policy results in people being outed, careers destroyed or suicides being provoked."
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Suicide? TORIES DON'T CARE M8.
 
Syder

Syder

The Moyes are Back in Town
Moderator
Oct 25, 2017
12,543
I still don't get how you block people from seeing porn on non-porn sites like reddit.
 

NeroPaige

Member
Jan 8, 2018
1,710
How do they fine a site in a different legal jurisdiction like the USA that "doesn't comply"? Like, shouldn't the UK government just block the site rather than demand payment from a site in a different legal jurisdiction? What if many countries did this protection racket lol.

Syder said:
I still don't get how you block people from seeing porn on non-porn sites like reddit.
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They gave them an exemption. So it will funnel more users to that site.
 
Praetorpwj

Praetorpwj

Member
Nov 21, 2017
4,365
Stay Up Be Easy said:
Friday night I was sitting outside the local Subway wearing my Civil War suit and eating my dinner when a dude I know came out of the store next to Subway. It was the little brother of a friend of mine, and he saw me and came up and started talking. Dude was pumped to be out of school in a month and a half or so for the summer and was carefree, and had rode his bike up to the strip mall. He said he was going into tenth grade next year. He respected the Civil War suit even though he wasn't familiar with Gary Puckett and the Union GAP.

He seemed like an open and honest young dude and I said, "So what are you up to this evening?"

He said, "Not much....I'll probably ride on home now and look at some porn on the internet, know what I'm sayin'?"

I go "Bwhahahaha!! Have fun, man," and sank my chompers into my Grilled Chicken Sub:



As he started pedaling off....it all hit me.

I yelled, with my mouth full of shredded lettuce and bread and chicken, "WHOA! STOP!!!"

He whirled his bike around and goes, "Huh?"

I sat up straight and swallowed my food and took a drink from my lemonade and cleared my throat, looking at him sternly while wiping bread crumbs off my Civil War suit and adjusting my collar to "lecture mode." He sat there on his bike and goes, "What's up?"

I said, "Listen to me," while wiping my mouth with my Subway napkin. "When I was your age, I had a bike......but I sure as hell didn't have the Internet. The only person who had the Internet when I was 15 was Bill fukken Gates."

I continued, my voice raising, "Imagine not being able to go home, and with the click of a button, download a video clip of a hot chick masturbating. IMAGINE not being able to download a pic of swimsuit models. TRY TO FUKKEN imagine not even having the MTV videos as pornographic as they have become. You know why? Because I guaranDAMNtee it that you wouldn't have resorted to jerking off to a sweaty Christina Aguilera bobbing her ass down in a schoolgirl skirt. No, instead you'd having nothing more than Amy Grant's Baby, Baby video, son, and YOU BETTER FUKKEN BELIEVE that I got my jerk on to that thing. And Mariah Carey? You have no idea, buddy- you think she was mashing her tits together and waving her ass at you while wearing Daisy Dukes in her music videos in the early 90's? FUKK NO! She was fully clothed and swinging on swings. And I jerked to that video, too. Alyssa Milano wasn't going spread eagle in Maxims either dude. She was on 'Who's The Boss' and never exposed more than a fukken pair of hot biceps. That's right- I blasted spooge to biceps...

Her FUKKEN BICEPS!!!!"

Dude was still cracking up but paying attention.

I said, "I can promise you that we had to wait and wait and wait to get a good shot of Kelly fukken Bundy to drop our drawers. You may flip right past Baywatch re-runs now, dude, but back then I was muting the TV in my parents basement to blow a pent-up load to Melrose Place, dude."

At this point dude was cracking up and going, "Holy shit, man, that's too much!"

I stood up and said, "YOU LISTEN TO ME!"



"You take it for granted this Internet porn, but it is a privilege and NOT a right, son."

I continued, "When I was your age we had to fork over money to homeless fukks outside the convenience store and give them enough to buy themselves malt liquor and buy us a damn porn rag, and it took balls just to do that. I once pleaded with the Sam's convenience store clerk to sell me a damn Hustler. I put my pride on the line and made a fukken IDIOT out of myself just to get some material to jerk to!"

"You didn't have the Internet did you..." the kid said, humbled.

I took another chug of lemonade and said, "Boy, one time I was riding my bike down an alley and saw where someone had thrown out a couple boxes of Sports Illustrated magazines. Now if you saw those today you've ride past them. But I thumbed through both boxes and there was no swimsuit issue. Then I scoured through each magazine and came up with some Kristi Yamaguchi pics- that's it. I jerked to Gooch for a week straight, dude! For the next several weeks that summer, I was filled with the hope that some fukker was going to throw out his collection of Penthouses. I pedaled my ass off in 90-degree weather, looking in trashcans and coming up empty. I was LUCKY enough to find NOT a Victoria's Secret catalog, but a J. Crew Women's spring catalog! That was gold, dude. The best I could find was a FUKKEN pic of a chick wearing Spring gear!!"



Not swimsuits," I said. "Hell no. That would have been too easy. The world didn't work that way back then. Just shorts. You had to EARN your jerk. I fukken sneaked into the basement steps of a middle school and jerked off to a J. FUKKEN CREW MAGAZINE!"

A couple women were walking out of Subway with their drinks and overheard me and one of them looked back with anger and said, "That's just wonderful."

I just glared at her with nobility as they walked off.

I told the kid, "My challenge to you is to unplug your computer for THREE WEEKS, and see what kind of material you can come up with. You'll be like Henry David Thoreau at fukken Walden Pond, dude. One with nature and possibly capitalizing off having a hot teacher giving you summer school sessions. Dude, when I was a teenager I had parents drop me off at the movies to watch 'Sliver' even though I told them I was going to see some Billy Crystal flick. I carried in a polyester cloth, wrapped it around my johnson, and rubbed one out while fully clothed to Sharon Stone's bare tits. You think that's sad? You don't know the extremes, dude! The summer when I was 14, I did the SAME THING at the movie 'Cool World' so that I could beat off to a cartoon character with Kim Basinger's voice."

The kid goes, "You beat it to 'Cool World'???????"

Like Jack Nicholson admitting he called for Code Red in A Few Good Men, I pounded my fist on the table and screamed, "YOU'RE DAMN RIGHT I DID!"



I regrouped my temper and said, "The only thing sadder than that is your generation- the generation that takes net porn for granted and fails to recognize the generation before that had to subscribe to Playboys and use the address of an abandoned house, and then drive past said abandoned house every week to see if the FUKKEN porn rag was on the steps. No dice. No dice, son. Nothing but beating off to classy women wearing Spring slacks in a J. Fukken Crew magazine. That or hoping that the hot brunette on Sesame Street was wearing a tight shirt."

I threw the rest of my sandwich away, grabbed my drink and got up to leave. "Take my challenge, son," I said. "Take my challenge."

He goes, "Ok, Giovanni!"

I looked back and stared with nobility and encouragement and one last word of advice:



"You gotta earn your fukken jerk, son. You gotta earn your fukken jerk."

I tossed my drink in the trashcan and walked away.

Sincerely,

Giovanni Peters

Cheetos
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I appreciated this and it's so true.
 
Cocolina

Cocolina

Member
Oct 28, 2017
8,004
I love the idea of having to buy a perv pass from another human being. Never underestimate the overwhelming power of shame on the average Brit. Genius psychology.
 
danowat

danowat

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Oct 27, 2017
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Cocolina said:
I love the idea of having to buy a perv pass from another human being. Never underestimate the overwhelming power of shame on the average Brit. Genius psychology.
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Not that I like the way the government have gone about this AT ALL, but going into a newsagent to buy a wank pass isn't really much different from having to going into a newsagent to buy a jazz mag before the internet.
 
Danielsan

Danielsan

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Oct 26, 2017
5,677
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This has to be a contender for dumbest law yet. But yeah, got to protect the kids from seeing people having sex...
This will only be a minor inconvenience for any kid who's out looking for porn on the internet.
 
Menome

Menome

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Oct 25, 2017
6,434
danowat said:
Not that I like the way the government have gone about this AT ALL, but going into a newsagent to buy a wank pass isn't really much different from having to going into a newsagent to buy a jazz mag before the internet.
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A return to the situations of being accosted by a teenager: "Oi mate, here's a tenner, can you buy a Porn Pass for me whilst you're in there?"
 
Tregard

Tregard

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Oct 27, 2017
5,221
Looking forward to seeing how local newsagents market the Porn passes. Probably next to the Worther's Originals?
 
.exe

.exe

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Oct 25, 2017
22,284
There is no ethical masturbation under conservatism. Check and mate right wing incels.
 
BobbeMalle

BobbeMalle

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Dec 5, 2017
2,019
"we're gonna cockblock you guys cause we gotta sell those fap passes and also porn is bad.. also that, yeah. BUT we're still putting the weather lady in tiny clothes.. just as an appetizier for you"
 
Clap3rap

Clap3rap

Member
Apr 14, 2019
12
In my opinion this law won´t achieve much other than annoy people and help the vpn business.
With this law, the EU copyright directive and EU terror directive, there will be a golden area for vpn provider.

Just a thought, but doesn´t this law actually increase the possibility for people to encounter more problematic content?
If all known and law abiding websites implement this system, than a child who really wants to find porn (and doesn´t know what a vpn is) eventually will land on a website with questionable content.
 
Acorn

Acorn

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Oct 25, 2017
10,972
Scotland
Can't wait until a database is inevitably hacked and people get fired, blackmailed etc etc all because they just had a wank and didn't know about vpns.
 
tommy7154

tommy7154

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
5,370
This is some of the dumbest shit I've ever heard. My theory with zero evidence is that there's money coming from somewhere that will benefit from this.
 
Aftermath

Aftermath

Member
Oct 27, 2017
3,756
"You wanna buy some Porn?."

- Some grubby guy on a Market stall with DVD's /Blurays full of Porn, or maybe you'll have to know a guy, that knows a guy.
 
Mutedpenguin

Mutedpenguin

Member
Dec 5, 2017
1,172
There's a porn "opt-in" box you need to tick for all the biggest ISP's in the UK via your account (that has been around for years). You'd think that would be enough.

If kids are still viewing porn, for the most part it's because parents chose to opt-in for porn (so it's on them)...or the kid is smart enough to get around the block themselves.
 
Hamster Plugin

Hamster Plugin

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,845
So do you have to put your personal information to some site? That's gonna allow for some easy phishing attacks.
 
Fallout-NL

Fallout-NL

Member
Oct 30, 2017
6,762
Pillock said:
Kids are spoiled for porn these days. When I was a kid I had to make do with magazines call Razzle, Escort or Fiesta that you would generally find in carrier bags that had been dumped in parks or woods.
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What is it with pornography and finding it in the woods? That quite literally happened to me when I was 11 or 12 years old.
 
Protome

Protome

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Oct 27, 2017
15,732
Mutedpenguin said:
The only times I've been "accidentally" exposed to pornography are on instagram, youtube and twitter.
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Yep. It's so absurdly blatant that they're lying about why they're doing it.
Nobody in the history of mankind has ever been accidentally exposed to porn because they went to a porn site.

Except when I used to trick people into loading up Aeris Dies in high school computing classes telling them it was a FF7 fan site.

So really this ban is probably my fault, sorry guys.
 
randompasserby

randompasserby

Member
Apr 17, 2019
1,387
Viridia
If they're sincerely doing this to keep porn away from kids, speaking as someone from a country with supposedly "clean internet"...
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

If they're just looking for more backdoor on private citizens monitoring then fuck em.
 
Protome

Protome

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Oct 27, 2017
15,732
Mauricio_Magus said:
They'd literally have to block twitter out of existence, and they won't.
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Sites that aren't explicitly porn sites are exempt which is why it's all even more incredibly pointless and stupid.

You gotta wonder if the Tumblr execs are kicking themselves just now though. If they had leaned into porn instead of trying to get rid of it, Tumblr could have become massively popular in the UK over the next year. Not that the Tumblr Porn ban actually did anything, it's still full of porn.
 
mxbison

mxbison

Banned
Jan 14, 2019
2,148
Sounds like the typical old politicians that don't know shit trying to fight the evil internet.

Sadly those are the people with power.
 
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