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What are you on about? The article also clearly mentions the kid's phone addiction. What's being discussed is excessive screen time, not just gaming
I think they are just having a reaction to a common attitude some older generations have towards gaming that they've experienced and are just assuming these parents feel the same.
Not really appropriate for this thread if the article isn't mentioning it.
Lmfaaooooo.
You be bringing me back from the edge sometimes, bruh. Thanks.
This.
I'm not saying you should go out socializing with people and be in close quarters, even outside, but you can 100% still go outside and ride your bike. Just wear a mask. If the kid enjoys mountain biking, tell him to go mountain biking.
EDIT:
Actually reading the article, I feel like they should've put this part up top.
This is what a kid means by "my whole life" when referring to their phone/device. It's their entire means of socialization and access to the world, especially during a pandemic. Some parents don't actually hear their kids when they're listening to them argue with them. A kid can't articulate "this is how I connect with my social circle and the world", so they just say "this is my whole world". A lot of parents don't know how to treat children like children, so they treat them like adults, which isn't fair to the kid.
Also a kid's dog dies and you get mad at him for wanting to hang out with his friends on Xbox? The first thing I did as a 30 year old when my mom died (aside from help make funeral arrangements and hang out with my dad and sister for a bit) was go get a cup of coffee with my friend whose mom died 12 years prior. I sought the company of a friend who would understand. If this had happened during COVID, I would've hopped on Discord with him and played an MMO or something. Parents really need to chill the fuck out.
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Excusing a problem by describing another problem isn't really a great argument. I rarely find people with the opinion that the majority of the population has become addicted to their phones is a good thing.
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Except during that 50 hours he's keeping his community safe, socializing with friends virtually, at least simulating his mind and probably building teamwork skills, it's more than just watching TV.
They 'can't have everything for one year'? Dude shove it entirely up your arse. I'M entitled because I think the attitudes of dicks like you towards what kids have lost in the last year is pathetic? Entitled to fucking what?
As someone that had parents that almost never regulated my time wrt video games and watching TV I'm absolutely in favor of restricting access to such things for kids below a certain age of development, but at the same time I was also growing up in a time with no pandemic. Despite a lot of time with games I also spent a ton of time outside riding my bike all over the neighborhood, playing at friend's houses, going on adventures etc. I can't imagine the potential emotional stunting the pandemic may have on kids' development and no I don't just mean the excessive time on screens. A general inability to be with their peers in person, do things like visit each other's homes, go to movies, or just learning to be comfortable around a larger group of people ie in person classroom time is definitely going to have a broader effect on one's development.
I don't think this father's reaction is healthy however, its projecting a level of their own guilt onto their kid and making the latter feel like there's something wrong with them. The fuck are they supposed to do about the current situation? Games and their phone are probably the only ways for them to have any social interaction beyond their parents in this shitty pandemic reality, so if its between those and solo activities I'd say maintaining the social ones are more important. Now that's not to say it isn't important to introduce something away from screens and mandate time doing something like reading or writing, or something hands on like a crafts project of some sort. There should be a balance, but I imagine its very difficult for parents these days Covid or not with so much of the culture already inundated with attention span dwindling tech that's in our faces for so much of our time awake. This is a problem that extends culturally not just during the pandemic. I do hope some social movements come out of this to try and foster healthy alternatives to screen time for kids, as integral as those may be to society at large I still don't think its great to let them be glued to it constantly.
I don't think this father's reaction is healthy however, its projecting a level of their own guilt onto their kid and making the latter feel like there's something wrong with them. The fuck are they supposed to do about the current situation? Games and their phone are probably the only ways for them to have any social interaction beyond their parents in this shitty pandemic reality, so if its between those and solo activities I'd say maintaining the social ones are more important. Now that's not to say it isn't important to introduce something away from screens and mandate time doing something like reading or writing, or something hands on like a crafts project of some sort. There should be a balance, but I imagine its very difficult for parents these days Covid or not with so much of the culture already inundated with attention span dwindling tech that's in our faces for so much of our time awake. This is a problem that extends culturally not just during the pandemic. I do hope some social movements come out of this to try and foster healthy alternatives to screen time for kids, as integral as those may be to society at large I still don't think its great to let them be glued to it constantly.
Problem is, today most things are done in screens. For years I'm only buying e-books, for example.
People on phones can be doing anything: socializing, working, playing, listening to music/podcasts... I think addiction to social media is unhealthy, but that's not on phones.
Most apps on your phone is designed to give constant positive reinforcement. Whether talking about mobile games, social media, youtube algorithms or spotify recommendations, most apps are designed to maximize user engagement. This is undeniable fact and very much by design. This can very possibly create an imbalance between time spent in multimedia compared to time spent in the actual physical reality your body inhabits. You are constantly aware that there is a very quick dopamine fix available on your phone.
I'll gladly admit I have problems with this myself, and considering I'm a middle aged adult with a degree, job responsibilities and a fully developed pre-frontal cortex, I can only imagine how easy it is to get caught up with these things as an adolescent. I love all forms of multimedia, but engaging with it in moderation should not be a controversial approach for most people.
Edit: And sure, e-books are a thing. But something tells me the article isn't about those.
Games and his phone are likely this kid's only way to socialize at the moment. Maybe try to look past the boomer-esque "these kids today" angle. Worst case he may need a push to exercise more since it's so easy to just sit around the house day and night this year. A melodramatic article with asinine pull quotes and dropping his whole family's real names for some reason aren't helping anyone.
Chipping away at my backlog is keeping my sanity right now.
Honestly, you can't and shouldn't do a lot of things mentioned in the OP right now, so why let it bother you? Why put more strain on hospitals because you mountain biked during a pandemic and broke your leg?
Honestly, you can't and shouldn't do a lot of things mentioned in the OP right now, so why let it bother you? Why put more strain on hospitals because you mountain biked during a pandemic and broke your leg?
Very disappointed at most of your reactions Era.
While I strongly disagree on the notion of 'hur dur if you're playing video games you're a loser' like this father seems to have, I think we can have a hearty conversations on how much should we allow game time and screen time for our kids. There is a merit in that.
I absolutely don't think playing game 40+ hrs a week is healthy, and every once in a long while I would fantasize reallocating all those times I spent playing games to doing other things; like learning french, sitting for CFA lvl 2 and 3, preparing better for that one job interview, learning more on cryptos so I can be the go to person in my office etc.
Like, seriously, unless you want to work in the industry as pro gamer or whatev it really is a net negative experience playing too much video games. Do you think elon musk play video games all day? as much as he think JC denton is cool that dude probably only had one playthrough of deus ex and called it a day..
Also, no need to make comparison to watch TV if the father himself didn't make it, you're just projecting at this point. Doing both for too long are bad for you, end of story.
While I strongly disagree on the notion of 'hur dur if you're playing video games you're a loser' like this father seems to have, I think we can have a hearty conversations on how much should we allow game time and screen time for our kids. There is a merit in that.
I absolutely don't think playing game 40+ hrs a week is healthy, and every once in a long while I would fantasize reallocating all those times I spent playing games to doing other things; like learning french, sitting for CFA lvl 2 and 3, preparing better for that one job interview, learning more on cryptos so I can be the go to person in my office etc.
Like, seriously, unless you want to work in the industry as pro gamer or whatev it really is a net negative experience playing too much video games. Do you think elon musk play video games all day? as much as he think JC denton is cool that dude probably only had one playthrough of deus ex and called it a day..
Also, no need to make comparison to watch TV if the father himself didn't make it, you're just projecting at this point. Doing both for too long are bad for you, end of story.
He inherited and stole all the wealth he has. He didn't earn it by working hard. I don't know the details of his leisure time, but I can guarantee you that like all wealthy people, it is significant.
What are the options in this situation, really. There are people getting fines here for having coffee together in a park. God know what a family going for a hike would get. People are saying play a board game as a family. Great...you've managed to pass an entire hour. Now what do they do for the other 39 hours he would have spent gaming?
He could work on other hobbies that are more "productive", but if he's only into video games then that's just what he's into.
This isn't a normal world we live in right now. And there's not a lot of options besides staying inside and doing whatever to pass the time. Which is especially true if your too young to be working. Like what exactly are the parents doing that they feel is so much better anyway? Reading books? Lol.
He could work on other hobbies that are more "productive", but if he's only into video games then that's just what he's into.
This isn't a normal world we live in right now. And there's not a lot of options besides staying inside and doing whatever to pass the time. Which is especially true if your too young to be working. Like what exactly are the parents doing that they feel is so much better anyway? Reading books? Lol.
Not everyone wants to be Elon Musk or the best employee of the office, student in class etc. I value my free time much more.
Oh get the boy a PC with PCVR so he can play modded Beat Saber to stay in shape. ;)
Kidding aside. If somebody is forced to sit at home all day for the love of god just let them play, as long as school and/or job are not suffering from it. It's okay to force some gymnastics outside of that as a parent.
Apart of that: we all gotta adapt to this lockdown thing, so do these parents. It's unfortunate the boy can't go mountain climbing and basketballing at the moment, but one also has to try and stay sane while under lockdown :)
Kidding aside. If somebody is forced to sit at home all day for the love of god just let them play, as long as school and/or job are not suffering from it. It's okay to force some gymnastics outside of that as a parent.
Apart of that: we all gotta adapt to this lockdown thing, so do these parents. It's unfortunate the boy can't go mountain climbing and basketballing at the moment, but one also has to try and stay sane while under lockdown :)
40 hours is definitely too much - there's a balance that can be found given the circumstances, and 40 hours/week is not balanced.
That being said, the parents sitting for a NYT photoshoot with their poor teenage son is going to do way more damage than any video games ever could. I truly feel sorry for the kid; he's never going to live this down.
That being said, the parents sitting for a NYT photoshoot with their poor teenage son is going to do way more damage than any video games ever could. I truly feel sorry for the kid; he's never going to live this down.
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Here's a thought, play with him. You know, a coop game, or any multiplayer game. Join him. Involve yourself with your child. Don't vilify them and their interests. At least they're doing something to stay sane and safe during a pandemic. Pathetic of these parents to turn their child into a pariah just to make themselves feel better and get 5 minutes of fame on the news.
No wife and kids, but yes, gaming can be a HUGE stress relief for me as well.
Depends what you are refeering by "treat", but more often than not, it is better to treat them like adults than kids.
What kind of argument is that?!?!
Or they could be, you know, concerned parents and want the best for their child? This is far more likely than your assumption.
Concerned parents who want what's best for their child don't put their kid on blast for the entire country to see, while also self-admitting they hadn't tried anything at all to help their kid.
Did the parents try actually engaging their child? I'm guessing they couldn't be bothered to.
Parents that want the best for their child probably aren't going to air their family grievances in the newspaper.
By forcing them into a faux mugshot for a news headline to make fun of them and turn them into a laughing stock around the world for the rest of their lives? Get out of here with that garbage.
funny, as an adult, my only contact with friends was over multiplayer games, and playing with gamepass helped me to save money over the quarantine since i was not going out or partying. But yeah, every now and them there are old fucks that think "videogames are the cause of violence" yada yada.
Is that a lot? I'm almost certain I played that amount when I was younger and I've definitely been clocking in those kinds of hours during the pandemic.
I feel like maybe 10+ a day is when it starts to become something that needs looking into.
Most addictions to things like pain pills usually start out of legitimate use don't they?
This year and last are exceptional. At this moment, I'm in favour of whatever keeps kids happy, engaged, and passionate - whether it's games or anything else. Obviously I don't encourage my daughter to play Minecraft for hours in one sitting, but I don't currently make a huge effort to rein in her overall gaming time either, because it's one of the best tools for giving her stimulation and engagement outside the house right now.
In the longer term, though, when COVID is behind us, 40 hours a week is too much time for a child to spend on ANY passive hobby. Passive being the operative word. If my daughter was learning 3D design with a view to creating characters for games, that's active engagement and a valid use of a significant amount of her time. If she was playing Call of Duty (and I like Call of Duty a lot) 40 hours a week just to grind camos, that's completely passive activitiy and not a productive use of that much of her time.
40 hours a week is 5 hours a day. It's almost a full-time job for an adult. It's a lot of time to spend doing anything.
14 hours a week in Fortnite or Warzone? I'm ok with that. That's still in "have some fun alongside your other passions and responsibilities" territory. 40 is way past that mark.
Reminder: I'm talking longer term here. During lockdown, with school closed, and no way to see friends, games can be a valuable tool for stability.
In the longer term, though, when COVID is behind us, 40 hours a week is too much time for a child to spend on ANY passive hobby. Passive being the operative word. If my daughter was learning 3D design with a view to creating characters for games, that's active engagement and a valid use of a significant amount of her time. If she was playing Call of Duty (and I like Call of Duty a lot) 40 hours a week just to grind camos, that's completely passive activitiy and not a productive use of that much of her time.
40 hours a week is 5 hours a day. It's almost a full-time job for an adult. It's a lot of time to spend doing anything.
14 hours a week in Fortnite or Warzone? I'm ok with that. That's still in "have some fun alongside your other passions and responsibilities" territory. 40 is way past that mark.
Reminder: I'm talking longer term here. During lockdown, with school closed, and no way to see friends, games can be a valuable tool for stability.
American parents are waaaaay too controlling with their kid's time and activities.
When I was a kid in Europe I roamed around on the mean streets and forests all day - when I weren't playing games for as long as I liked, whenever I wanted.
And I turned out fantastic.
#SayNoToHelicopter
When I was a kid in Europe I roamed around on the mean streets and forests all day - when I weren't playing games for as long as I liked, whenever I wanted.
And I turned out fantastic.
#SayNoToHelicopter
HA!
Also loooooool :D
seriously These parents need to trust their kids more and understand how modern life works.
"Finally enjoying that 4k goodness on console , Son"
"Yes, Dad it's awesome"
"We need to cut down on your screen time and contact the newspaper about you, Son"
"I hate you, Dad!"
Tell me what the kid should do 16 hours a day at the park? Hell, even with 40 hours a week gaming, he still needs to fill 10, TEN! hours a day, or 72 hours a week with other activities.
People in this thread just, really don't have a grasp on time management. On just how many hours there are in a day, how much time you have to fill, how to make the most of it.
god, people are complaining about this. But all honestly, games have ruined kids, who have too much freedom and can play all day. Need physical activity as well.
I have a feeling the "watching TV all the time" days are over for most people that aren't boomers or older. Watching TV used to the be activity with the highest engagement/effort ratio, but that's been largely surpassed by internet, social media, youtube, etc. that you can watch on your phone literally anywhere (even lying on your bed) and require even less commitment and focus. Whether that's a positive thing or not is of course debatable.
It's because the article itself framed the problem as the old and tiring "excessive vidya gaems will rot your kids' brain!!!1" spiel instead of, you know... centering it around a hearty conversation about how it's a stressful time for everyone, how kids have a difficulty to adapt to this new school-less environment, and how parents often don't have the resources or motivation to give alternate activities for their kids.
But no, the author explicitly titled his article "Children Screen Time Has Soared..." and framed the whole thing around that. So everybody then see the problem is 'increased screen time' and the solution is 'less screen time', while problem is deeper than that and the solution is more complex than that. Like, these are the last two paragraphs of the article, and nobody offers a solution:
I think there is an argument to be made for limiting tv/game time and having kids read, play outside in the yard (if able), or play board games/other non screen activities. That said blame should also be on the parents here for not monitoring the situation if they thought it was a concern.
That said I think if someone is having a fight with a spouse or SO and gaming is how they use to cool off that is a perfectly healthy option.
That said I think if someone is having a fight with a spouse or SO and gaming is how they use to cool off that is a perfectly healthy option.
And before games it was TV, heavy metal, rock and roll... there's always been something "ruining the kids". I can picture cavemen blaming the invention of fire on ruining the kids: "in my time, we ate meat raw, not this newfangled cooked stuff for weaklings!"
Also worth pointing out that currently, the safest and most convenient way to exercise regularly during a pandemic happens to be precisely a videogame.
Yeah, from experience, the end of that article literally says he's not getting his phone at all during the week. Without even having school to talk to his friends during, his social life is basically going to become non-existant. I know a lot of people on this site skew older, but as someone who went to highschool when smartphones finally started getting big and everyone had one, tons of social interaction is intrinsically linked to kids having phones.
There's a point where it's just too much videogames and that's just as unhealthy, as sitting on your ass binging Netflix.
Especially considering how toxic the online environments are in videogames. I can only see it having a negative affect on kids.
It's fine if the kid wants to connect with friends for a couple hours, and play - but there should be a limit.
The thing is it's also up to the parents to find activities to do together. Go outdoors for a change! Ride bikes, go fishing, go for a walk, or go to the park for a catch.
Electronic toys shouldn't be this kid's "life".
Especially considering how toxic the online environments are in videogames. I can only see it having a negative affect on kids.
It's fine if the kid wants to connect with friends for a couple hours, and play - but there should be a limit.
The thing is it's also up to the parents to find activities to do together. Go outdoors for a change! Ride bikes, go fishing, go for a walk, or go to the park for a catch.
Electronic toys shouldn't be this kid's "life".