Reagan (2024)
You know something? He did say "well" a lot.
From the director of
3 Ninjas: High Noon at Mega Mountaint,
Reagan starts with a "stylized" version of his assassination attempt, which promptly cuts into a Cold War 00s Marvel film opening credits montage.
We are then presented with an up and coming young Russian politician who asks Jon Voight why the Soviets gave up. Jon Voight, who has scouted Ronnie since day one and knew he would take down their empire, decides to tell this boy his entire life story for what it seems like days and the fake Russian accent narration dictates the film. (Editors Note: He really likes his lifeguard phase). Voight, in flashback, has dye and sprayed on facial hair and his face looks like this for most of the film.
The film loves fish eye lens shots for some reason. Every scene is wildly disconnected and feels like the "amp up" portion in a movie trailer. I'm also quite sure I saw the stick controlling a fighter pilot jet in one scene. The only criticism he receives is a very 80s montage of MTV kids dancing who (maybe?) didn't like like him and someone holding a sign for a split second about some AIDS thing.
I did get one actual laugh at a scene, where Voight goes to speak with the Soviet leaders and they just keep dying on him one-by-one before they can tell him anything as he still has the face as seen above.
If I have to be earnest, I
do think Quaid is actually giving somewhat of an effort. Most of the performances are remarkably bad. Penelope Ann Miller blows it, though not literally, and even Quaid still sounds like he is Harrison Ford for the entire film.
A lot of unintended laughter from the audience. The best moment was hearing John Williams's Superman theme for his documentary trailer, because that is always going to sound dope in a cinema.