Blocked ex, felt bad, unblocked and had an argument where of course everything she says was right. Been 2 months nearly since the breakup and even though she says she is the problem, I will always blame myself.
All I do is complain about how shit my life is and I am not deserving to be where I am, just want to go die in a hole and not worry anymore.
Bit of background:
I was dishes at age 25 with no career in focus
I can't do simple tasks
I am very depressed
25 was the age I finally started taking steps to get my life in order.
That was nine years ago. I went from being in very similar shoes at the ago of 25 to currently having been preapproved for a home loan.
You got this. I know it feels daunting, but that's part of it. You gotta decide where you want to be in ten years. Once you determine that, set milestones you should reach each year. You have to make those determined first steps, then follows those with a few more. Eventually you'll look back at where you were and wonder what took you so long to get started, but still thankful that you did start.
The end result will most likely not be exactly where you set your goal to be, but as long as you make the effort and don't try to cut corners on high risk ventures, you should at least be better off than you were when you started.
I haven't hit my milestones, but even then, I'm still much better off than where I started.
Are you in the U.S.? If so, you should qualify for a grant for school. Research and see what trades are in need in your area. Apply for grants to trade schools. Find something and set yourself on a path toward your future.
I worked long hours and did schoolwork in the evenings and weekends. It was rough, I was tired. But I did it, it's over, and I'm on the other side.
You can do it. I know you can.