Being hit by your parents as a punishment

[Paperboywriter]

Have you been hit by your parents as a punishment and how is your stance about it today?

MOD EDIT: Please refrain from posting images and gifs depicting child abuse. Thank you.

 

[CreepingFear]

1. Yes.
2. I am for this being banned as 40 plus countries have already done so.

 

[ViewtifulJC]

I'm black, so yes. That seemed pretty common, growing up. I'd like to think I wouldn't do that with my own kids, but as far as I know I don't have any so what do I know?

 

[Mediking]

I got spanked as a kid.... I cried then....

I turned out all right.

Thanks Momma.

 

[Mathieran]

I think I got spanked once. My parents weren't the disciplinary type.

I grew up feeling pretty neutral about it. I used to spank my daughter for serious altercations because I thought it was the thing I was supposed to do.

But studies show it is not helpful, in fact even harmful, so I don't do it anymore. I regret that I ever did it in the first place.

 

[Drakeon]

Corporal punishment is illegal in jails and prisons, you damn sure shouldn't be hitting a child. Violence doesn't teach anything other than violence.

 

[Deleted member 14002]

1. Yes.
2. I am for this being banned as 40 plus countries have already done so.

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This

 

[Damaniel]

Exactly once, when I was very young and getting ready to stick something in a wall socket. It was just a quick swat. I think my sister may have been spanked twice.

 

[adj_noun]

1. Yeah. Hand and belt.

2. Not a fan. There's nothing that I look back on and go "gee whiz, sure am glad I got whacked that one time. Sure taught me a lesson!"

 

[Skelepuzzle]

Spankings were fine (well the causes weren't), slapping me in the head was really shitty. Especially considering it was over extremely minor things.

Humiliating your kids, especially without cause, is a good way to make them hate you.

Generally against doing it to kids, though minor slaps to their hands are almost unavoidable when they're reaching for the inside of an oven or something. Don't so much consider that hitting in the sense of the aforementioned stuff. It's not really a punishment either so I guess it doesn't count.

 

[geomon]

Yes. Not a fan of it myself.

 

[Forsaken82]

1. Yes.
2. I am for this being banned as 40 plus countries have already done so.

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So you want spanking to be banned?

 

[Deleted member 11413]

Yes, once.

We know now that it's bad for your kids and damaging for the parent-child relationship, so you shouldn't do it. It also encourages violent and aggressive behavior in children, because they learn that it is an acceptable response to anger or method of punishment.

 

[NinjaScooter]

Yes and it didn't teach me shit but to fear my parents.

 

[Lord Hypnos]

My dad would hit me across the back, ass and back of thighs with both ends of his leather belt as punishment.

I mean, it did work as punishment but it also left me with other emotional issues. I don't think I'd hit my potential children as punishment, but I've forever been put off wanting kids as I'm afraid my issues would impact them.

 

[Seductivpancakes]

1. Yes including other physical punishment like being made to stand with one leg in a bent position. The only thing I learned from it was to be more low key whenever I decided to be bad.

2. Not a fan and should be banned. Being a child's parent isn't an excuse to hit them.

 

[ElephantShell]

I never was by my parents, neither was my brother. It's not something I would do, I personally don't think it's right.

 

[Rayne]

Yeah only thing it taught me was to dislike their touch.

I'm pretty sure that wasn't ideal for them.

 

[Pau]

When we were very young. The last time they hit us was when my dad slapped my sister on the back and knocked the wind out of her.

I don't plan on having kids, but no, I don't think I would do that and never have when taking care of children.

 

[Chamberlin]

Violence against children, no matter how mild the parent considers it to be, is cowardly, lazy abuse and should not be legal. I can understand that some parents were raised that way and 'turned out fine' as far as they know, so it may not be that intuitive how much harm it's likely to do, but any responsible parent should be looking into the data on this long before their first impulse to strike their child, and the data shows that it's a horrible idea.

 

[thefit]

I resent my mother to this day and hardly like talking to her or visit. If my kids ever hate me when they grow up it at least won't be for being beaten their entire young life.

 

[A Syrian Communist]

1. Yes.
2. I am for this being banned as 40 plus countries have already done so.

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Excellent first post

 

[Platy]

Yes
Completely against

Even without all the "violence is wrong" it just mean you are a bad parent
If the kid understands why are you hitting than you can do better
If the the kid don't understand than it is meaningless

 

[CreepingFear]

So you want spanking to be banned?

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100%. Everyone knows it's wrong and doesn't work, which is why over 40 countries have already banned it. But just like this thread, it comes down to "but I turned out okay" or "the bible says". Like clockwork.

Excellent first post

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[Ehoavash]

My dad always twisted my ear. Always hurt

It made me want to stay far from him as much as possible

Mom always slapped me but I could never take her hits seriously as dads

 

[sad but rad]

spanking is fine up to a certain age imo, however past like 4th grade it's just kinda weird. if your parents hit you in any way past that, it's bordering on abuse. slapping a kid in the face isn't cool, it's humiliating, and that's not discipline. I can see maybe like a slap in the back of the head snape style, but like obviously if you're punching, kicking, or throwing your kid around, fuck you.

 

[CHC]

A spank or a hard wrist grab was as bad as it got with me, luckily. My dad's father beat the hell out of him, to the point where my dad ran away at 16. My mom's father used to be an alcoholic, and even after sobering up is one of the most emotionally withholding and manipulative people I know. So all things considered, I feel very lucky that both my parents were awesome to me. They always did their best for me and still continue to, love 'em both.

 

[Deleted member 11413]

So you want spanking to be banned?

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It should be, imo. I'm not saying 'parent spanks kid, CPS instantly takes child away and parent goes to prison' as that would probably be worse for the child and parent in the long run, but it needs to be frowned upon and made clear that it's societally unacceptable.

 

[The Masked Mufti]

Got hit pretty badly during a really bad phase with my dad. We have a very strained relationship. Having said I'm for light discipline, for example a light spanking, though I will always prefer to handle it with words rather than my hands.

 

[Deleted member 9399]

Yeah, Brazilian parents. Usually a smack in the face when mouthing off, not so much spanking. Also my dad vehemently denies yanking me by the ear which is always funny to me because that 800% happened a handful of times.

Not for it, can't really think of an instance where it really taught me anything.

 

[Grenchel]

I was hit once by my parents, something that was encouraged by other parents believes it or not, and they never did it again. They were horrified by what they did.

I am completely against it. Violence to discourage action is disgusting.

 

[thebeeks]

Yes, a fair amount as a kid/young teenager. Hand, belt, and on rare occasion being grabbed/pulled by my hair.

Not really a fan. But I also don't have kids.

EDIT: Switches! Oh my god I forgot about switches. Yeah, I heard "go outside and cut me a switch" plenty.

 

[Spenny]

My grandma used to spank me and deep down there's a terrible amount of disdain for her.

 

[hydruxo]

Fortunately my parents never did. I think the second you resort to hitting your child is when you've failed as a parent. There are other ways that you can teach discipline without spanking/hitting your child.

 

[Stowaway Silfer]

1. Yes. Went much beyond just spanking, not that it would be justified or acceptable if limited to that level. Only truly taught me to fear at the time.
2. Don't plan on doing it when I have children. And I find the practice morally reprehensible.

 

[SweetVermouth]

Yes I've been hit and this should never be done and neither spanking.

 

[Goliath]

Yup, got the hand and belt.

Refuse to do that to my child.

 

[PanickyFool]

My father would throw me on the ground and kick me in the ribs.

I do not have a relationship with my father.

 

[Mahonay]

I'm very fortunate and have two ultra progressive parents. Was never hit by them. My mom especially had a very abusive upbringing and was 100 percent against anything like that. My dad is just a sweet man who would let you kick his ass before he ever would hit back. Although he did once chase a kid with a baseball bat that tried to steal my sister's bike, that was cool lol.

Now my older sister on the other hand...she beat my ass until I got big enough to hit back at about 12-13. That was a pretty good feeling when I finally had the upper hand.

 

[SweetVermouth]

Refuse to do that to my child.

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Angela is so proud of you.

 

[Deleted member 2145]

spanked and slapped, yes

imo it was fucked up. the most fucked up part to me was when the threat of being spanked or slapped was held over my head. it just made it this ever present thing that could happen if I acted out even if they didn't do it.

I doubt I'll have kids but I will never hit them if I do

 

[Jack Remington]

When I was very young, yes, but my parents stopped doing it and changed over to groundings and other punishments partway through elementary school, as I think they were informed that it wasn't good for child development. It didn't happen very frequently even before the change. There are a couple incidents that stick with me though, one very unjust and humiliating one in particular involving an I-said/he-said with an older adult in our church who was lying his ass off, and I still got spanked in front of a bunch of people. I will never do it to my kids if I have any.

 

[New Donker]

Italian so yes. We got the wooden spoon

 

[Buttchin-n-Bones]

It's abuse.

Corporal punishment on your kid is gambling that you're a good enough parent to compensate for exposing them to trauma.

 

[Dental Plan]

Yeah I got hit with a belt. My dad hit me a few times but after that it was a fear tactic. Instead of hitting me he would grab the belt from both sides and whip it together. When I heard that noise I knew I had to get myself in line.

 

[Paperboywriter]

What I dont understand is why you would still do it when you were hit by your parents yourself

 

[Violence Jack]

Yep. Switches, belts, smacked upside the head, and sandals until I was 10. I have a son now, and I definitely won't be doing that to him. If anything, maybe a quick pop on the butt with my hand just to get his attention, but my wife and I agreed nothing further than that.

 

[CreepingFear]

What I dont understand is why you would still do it when you were hit by your parents yourself

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It's hard to stop the cycle of violence. Also, I believe it's hard for many people to admit that it's wrong because that would admit that their parents fucked up.

 

[Servbot24]

Hit like... smacked? Or spanked? I have been spanked plenty of times, never otherwise hit though.

I have no problem with it at all. Probably made me a better kid, and it's not like they were wildly beating the shit out of me, it's just a quick sting. However I am way too much of a softy so I probably wouldn't spank my kids. Honestly if I ever had kids they would probably turn out to be spoiled jerks.

 

[Coyote Starrk]

My mom only ever hit me once and i 1000% deserved it. She cried about it later that night and apologized to me.


She spanked me plenty of times though.