So, finally left "the other site" and posting in here to re-sub. ABC (Aussie-born Chinese) represent!
Good to see you guys again!
Welcome, welcome! Always glad to be reunited with old members.
So, finally left "the other site" and posting in here to re-sub. ABC (Aussie-born Chinese) represent!
Good to see you guys again!
That depends on what it is and to what degree it changes your behavior towards that person. There are stereotypes that don't actually have anything to do with the culture at all. It's probably best not to assume something about a person based on race or gender because you're playing a numbers game and the losing end of that could end up with you offending someone. And at a certain point you're just looking for that specific behavior to confirm your way of thinking and if you follow anyone around long enough they'll eventually do something that you'll consider a stereotype.I got something that I had bubbling in the back of my mind. It's not exactly specifically an Asian problem, but it is what trigger the thought. It can be applied to people of all races.
Where do we draw the line between stereotyping and cultural conditioning? I've definitely caught myself assuming this person would do that because he's Chinese. Turned out I was right. I don't have super powers to see into the future, I guessed right because I understand the culture. Did I think that way because I was stereotyping the person, or did I think that way because I understand the culture? Do you ever catch yourself thinking a certain way about someone either because you're stereotyping them, or due to your understanding of their culture?
What about people who spit everywhere?
Are you not allowed to say country origin?
So is it considered racist or rude to point it out?
That depends on what it is and to what degree it changes your behavior towards that person. There are stereotypes that don't actually have anything to do with the culture at all. It's probably best not to assume something about a person based on race or gender because you're playing a numbers game and the losing end of that could end up with you offending someone. And at a certain point you're just looking for that specific behavior to confirm your way of thinking and if you follow anyone around long enough they'll eventually do something that you'll consider a stereotype.
Just don't be a dick about it and you're good.
It's not something ridiculous like "hurr hurr he has a small penis cause he's Chinese." It was more along the lines of the guy in a desperate house hunt because he wants to marry his girlfriend. Cause he was telling me how hard it was to find a house, and I just immediately asked if he was planning on getting married. It was a quick assumption on my part.
Here's the thing, the must-have-a-house-and-car rule wasn't a thing when I was a kid in China. Or maybe I wasn't aware of it since I was too young. I know not everyone had a car back when I was young.
I dunno... feels more like a socioeconomic thing than a cultural thing. Every culture has its form of "man needs financial security before he's worthy of marriage." Typically you see it more from middle class and up. You might've just arrived at the correct answer using the wrong assumption.
I get that, but it seems like such a big emphasis on this here in China. It's big news when someone gets into a naked marriage. Naked meaning the guy doesn't have a house and car.
It's not something ridiculous like "hurr hurr he has a small penis cause he's Chinese." It was more along the lines of the guy in a desperate house hunt because he wants to marry his girlfriend. Cause he was telling me how hard it was to find a house, and I just immediately asked if he was planning on getting married. It was a quick assumption on my part.
Here's the thing, the must-have-a-house-and-car rule wasn't a thing when I was a kid in China. Or maybe I wasn't aware of it since I was too young. I know not everyone had a car back when I was young.
Looking for a house just seems like something serious couples do in general. Usual progression is move into a place single, relationship, move in with SO, then look for bigger place. Didn't know that was considered just a thing in China. Only people I know who buy houses with their non-serious SO's are old rich people.
I don't know if a house is still a worthy investment if it's significantly more space than you need. As for the car part, I guess that never really comes up because most people already have a car for other reasons.In China, you don't marry until you already have a house and car. A lot of other countries, you can get a house after you marry. China is like dead set on it. Even if you love each other, the parents won't let you marry until you have a house and a car. My cousin did that, and his girlfriend broke up with him. That said, to him, he's made a worthy investment, so it wasn't a huge lose. It was a blow to my uncle though.
Sorry, this post is off-topic from the current conversation. Feel free to ignore me.
I find "waifu" to be racist and it hurts me that it's used everywhere and accepted by everyone.
I'm a first generation immigrant and have suffered and continue to suffer from people making fun of the way I talk. It's been a point of bullying for all my life here. It hurts when the message is "speak English or get out" and then when you try your hardest to speak English, people make fun of you for not doing it perfectly.
When I see English speakers use "waifu" mockingly it brings up these feelings. No one ever says it out of respect or admiration for the language/culture like they may when calling someone "_____-san" or something like that. It's always said in a mocking manner. How is this different from "ching chong" and stuff like that? Both are using perceived speech patterns to make fun of a people/culture.
I was in another Era community (that I left in tears) when I tried to say it was hurtful but most of them just turned on me and mocked me more and tried to make me feel like I'm wrong for being hurt. Am I wrong? Is anyone else in this or similar situation? How do you cope with it? Am I just "overly sensitive"?
Sorry, this post is off-topic from the current conversation. Feel free to ignore me.
I find "waifu" to be racist and it hurts me that it's used everywhere and accepted by everyone.
I'm a first generation immigrant and have suffered and continue to suffer from people making fun of the way I talk. It's been a point of bullying for all my life here. It hurts when the message is "speak English or get out" and then when you try your hardest to speak English, people make fun of you for not doing it perfectly.
When I see English speakers use "waifu" mockingly it brings up these feelings. No one ever says it out of respect or admiration for the language/culture like they may when calling someone "_____-san" or something like that. It's always said in a mocking manner. How is this different from "ching chong" and stuff like that? Both are using perceived speech patterns to make fun of a people/culture.
I was in another Era community (that I left in tears) when I tried to say it was hurtful but most of them just turned on me and mocked me more and tried to make me feel like I'm wrong for being hurt. Am I wrong? Is anyone else in this or similar situation? How do you cope with it? Am I just "overly sensitive"?
Nah, it's a shitty thing to do. That's the world we live in though.Sorry, this post is off-topic from the current conversation. Feel free to ignore me.
I find "waifu" to be racist and it hurts me that it's used everywhere and accepted by everyone.
I'm a first generation immigrant and have suffered and continue to suffer from people making fun of the way I talk. It's been a point of bullying for all my life here. It hurts when the message is "speak English or get out" and then when you try your hardest to speak English, people make fun of you for not doing it perfectly.
When I see English speakers use "waifu" mockingly it brings up these feelings. No one ever says it out of respect or admiration for the language/culture like they may when calling someone "_____-san" or something like that. It's always said in a mocking manner. How is this different from "ching chong" and stuff like that? Both are using perceived speech patterns to make fun of a people/culture.
I was in another Era community (that I left in tears) when I tried to say it was hurtful but most of them just turned on me and mocked me more and tried to make me feel like I'm wrong for being hurt. Am I wrong? Is anyone else in this or similar situation? How do you cope with it? Am I just "overly sensitive"?
Whenever I see someone use the term "waifu", I assume they're being tongue-in-cheek self-derogatory as that term is typically used by any non-native otaku.
Hmm, that's an interesting conversation. Whenever I see someone use the term "waifu", I assume they're being tongue-in-cheek self-derogatory as that term is typically used by any non-native otaku. I don't think they're saying it to mock the pronunciation of Japanese speakers, but rather as an indicator that they're speaking about a specific type of (usually fictional) woman that appeals to them. That said, I don't dismiss your concerns about its usage and if it legitimately bothers you, I'm glad that you're opening up about it.
Hmm, that's an interesting conversation. Whenever I see someone use the term "waifu", I assume they're being tongue-in-cheek self-derogatory as that term is typically used by any non-native otaku. I don't think they're saying it to mock the pronunciation of Japanese speakers, but rather as an indicator that they're speaking about a specific type of (usually fictional) woman that appeals to them. That said, I don't dismiss your concerns about its usage and if it legitimately bothers you, I'm glad that you're opening up about it.
It bothers me sometimes because I consider it symptomatic of the broader tendency to reduce Japanese cultural export to certain things that I do not consider representative of Japanese society holistically. In many ways, Japan is blessed because it has undue influence over the worldwide cultural milieu than it ought to, considering it's size. At the same time, I feel like there is a reductionist and ridiculing tendency -- evidenced by the popularity of tropes like "waifu," "weeaboo," "otaku", "hikikomori" and so on and so forth. Perhaps I am oversensitive about it because I am Japanese, though, I'm sure there are things that bother everybody about how their culture is represented on a global level.
That isn't to say that people can't like anime or video games or whatever pop-culture Japan that they want, hell, I like them too, to a certain extent. But I would like people to recognize that there is a broader cultural mosaic at play here.
Hmm, that's an interesting conversation. Whenever I see someone use the term "waifu", I assume they're being tongue-in-cheek self-derogatory as that term is typically used by any non-native otaku. I don't think they're saying it to mock the pronunciation of Japanese speakers, but rather as an indicator that they're speaking about a specific type of (usually fictional) woman that appeals to them. That said, I don't dismiss your concerns about its usage and if it legitimately bothers you, I'm glad that you're opening up about it.
I do think it's pretty weird when people use "waifu" to refer to their actual Japanese wives, or talk about going to Japan to find a waifu. It's all part of this really nasty history of treating Asian women as objects (which, to be honest, in certain regards Asian men aren't helping...)
Blame anime, which this site has a lot of fans. YouTube clips have this reference plastered everywhere.Sorry, this post is off-topic from the current conversation. Feel free to ignore me.
I find "waifu" to be racist and it hurts me that it's used everywhere and accepted by everyone.
Or toxic masculinity in general, not just Asians.I do think it's pretty weird when people use "waifu" to refer to their actual Japanese wives, or talk about going to Japan to find a waifu. It's all part of this really nasty history of treating Asian women as objects (which, to be honest, in certain regards Asian men aren't helping...)
I heard about this, too.In China, you don't marry until you already have a house and car. A lot of other countries, you can get a house after you marry. China is like dead set on it. Even if you love each other, the parents won't let you marry until you have a house and a car.
This is how I feel about it.Hmm, that's an interesting conversation. Whenever I see someone use the term "waifu", I assume they're being tongue-in-cheek self-derogatory as that term is typically used by any non-native otaku. I don't think they're saying it to mock the pronunciation of Japanese speakers, but rather as an indicator that they're speaking about a specific type of (usually fictional) woman that appeals to them. That said, I don't dismiss your concerns about its usage and if it legitimately bothers you, I'm glad that you're opening up about it.
Yeah.
How does your family celebrate Thanksgiving?
Used to do turkey every year with a bunch of stir-fry sides, but I'm thinking of changing it up.
Traditional American food mixed with Hawaii dishes. Haupia pie, kalua pig, etc.How does your family celebrate Thanksgiving?
Used to do turkey every year with a bunch of stir-fry sides, but I'm thinking of changing it up.
Most of the typical American trimmings, along with some bi hun (I dunno how to spell it honestly, that's what my mom calls it--stir fried cellophane noodles with cut up pork and veggies, basically) and homemade hot sour soup.How does your family celebrate Thanksgiving?
Used to do turkey every year with a bunch of stir-fry sides, but I'm thinking of changing it up.
Growing up, it was a fusion of American and Asian cuisine. We'd always have a turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy. We'd also have plenty of egg rolls, fried rice, and lettuce wraps. Also, plenty of family gambling and freshly heated arguments over nothing.
Most of the typical American trimmings, along with some bi hun (I dunno how to spell it honestly, that's what my mom calls it--stir fried cellophane noodles with cut up pork and veggies, basically) and homemade hot sour soup.
Sounds like a decent dish, lol. Seriously though that sucks. Is it one of those arguments that makes things awkward or just "family" arguing for arguments sake?
Family arguing for arguments sake. Almost exclusively my mom arguing with her sisters (who all argue together). It was all petty stuff too, mostly with regards to how to show respect or being disrespected by supposed "sleights".
I haven't checked the thread in a while - been busy.
Are we still doing food pictures?
Oh neat :3 bi hun is always on the holiday menu for sure, anything else is pretty variable.Dude, we totally do Bi-hun too. In addition to the usual stuff, we'll also have some sort of rice dish and the aforementioned bi-hun.
Hi everyone, native Chinese living in Shanghai here, been lurking for a while.
Just wanna say I really enjoy ERA and this thread particularly. Since the chance of GFW(Great fire wall) blocking a relative obscurity gaming forum is rather slim, I can stay here as long as I can I guess \o/
I know it's mostly about life experience as descendants of Asian immigrants, so I don't have much to add...but if anyone have interest in living and working in Shanghai, feel free to ask, I'll try my best to answer
Welcome to the thread (and the Dark Theme Net)! I'll probably never work outside of the US, but I'd love to visit Shanghai someday. Do you have any advice for visitors? For example, is it okay if you only know English?