Without compromising human free will, what do you choose to do with your new omnipotent abilities in the midst of your present, ever turbulent, always memorable world? ^^'
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You are given the Bruce Almighty treatment -- what are three major things you do/change?
- Thread starter TissueBox
- Start date
1) remake resident evil 6 so its actually good
2) create shenmue 3
3) world peace and end world hunger
2) create shenmue 3
3) world peace and end world hunger
Give myself the powers of Spider-Man.
Move to New York.
Give myself a shitty one bedroom apartment and a part time job that I'll struggle to keep in my new life.
Move to New York.
Give myself a shitty one bedroom apartment and a part time job that I'll struggle to keep in my new life.
- Turle-sized elephants and elephant-sized turtles
- Retroactively add a Where is Wally/Waldo component to every single movie ever made.
- Let chocolate chip muffins grow on trees.
I make myself Silver Age Superman, I begin my reign of terror.
Which fundamentally sums up to: keep running the world the way it does, keep democracy in effect, keep your ideas, religions, traditions. But if your leaders mess up, I'll go have a talk with them. An unpleasant one. Fix your countries or you get replaced.
In the free time, I'll fight natural disasters and help build infrastructures in disadvantaged areas. Probably swat down french jets in Africa as a hobby.
Which fundamentally sums up to: keep running the world the way it does, keep democracy in effect, keep your ideas, religions, traditions. But if your leaders mess up, I'll go have a talk with them. An unpleasant one. Fix your countries or you get replaced.
In the free time, I'll fight natural disasters and help build infrastructures in disadvantaged areas. Probably swat down french jets in Africa as a hobby.
1) I create the replicators from Star Trek and solve world hunger.
2) I create a planet full of renewable dilithium crystals (yeah I don't know how that would work either) somewhere in the solar system and tell everyone about it thus re-energizing the space race and solving any potential energy crisis.
3) I release the pee pee tape.
4) Fuck free will, I make everyone on Earth fall in love with Man of Steel, blu-ray sales skyrocket and I get 5 sequels, including a porn parody starring Henry himself.
edit: lol, I misread the title and the three wishes thing.
Okay, well, forget about the pee pee tape then. Sorry everyone.
2) I create a planet full of renewable dilithium crystals (yeah I don't know how that would work either) somewhere in the solar system and tell everyone about it thus re-energizing the space race and solving any potential energy crisis.
3) I release the pee pee tape.
4) Fuck free will, I make everyone on Earth fall in love with Man of Steel, blu-ray sales skyrocket and I get 5 sequels, including a porn parody starring Henry himself.
edit: lol, I misread the title and the three wishes thing.
Okay, well, forget about the pee pee tape then. Sorry everyone.
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1. Make Space travel easy, and make it easy to move multiple times faster than the speed of light. (Infinite space and planets for people to go to)
2. Make solar panels easily made with any sort of container of water, allowing 95% absorption for use. (basically free energy)
3. Change the human brain (and any intelligent creatures in the universe) to feel what people are feeling when you affect them. (Cause pain, you feel pain. Cause happiness, you feel happiness... lets just solve all the issues of the world)
2. Make solar panels easily made with any sort of container of water, allowing 95% absorption for use. (basically free energy)
3. Change the human brain (and any intelligent creatures in the universe) to feel what people are feeling when you affect them. (Cause pain, you feel pain. Cause happiness, you feel happiness... lets just solve all the issues of the world)
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1. Give myself Jean Grey level control over the Phoenix Force
2. Give Kojima full rights of the Metal Gear Solid franchise.
3. Roll back humanity's impact on the environment over the past 200 years without completely rolling back civilization. Sure, it will remove pollution and bring animals that were rendered extinct back from the dead, but the mere act of replenishing natural resources would just make humanity dependent on fossil fuels for longer than necessary and would likely just lead us back to where we are in 50-100 years again anyway.
2. Give Kojima full rights of the Metal Gear Solid franchise.
3. Roll back humanity's impact on the environment over the past 200 years without completely rolling back civilization. Sure, it will remove pollution and bring animals that were rendered extinct back from the dead, but the mere act of replenishing natural resources would just make humanity dependent on fossil fuels for longer than necessary and would likely just lead us back to where we are in 50-100 years again anyway.
#2 could just be Sony buying the rights to the "Escape From" movie series, and put Kojima in charge of everything to do with that series.
The Escape series doesn't have psychics, vampires, and giant robots.
I'd ask Morgan Freeman why is he wasting time with all the ungrateful chowderheads of his bungling creation and not playing Mario Tennis Aces in Eternity with me. Answer to all three things.
Remove all plastic waste
Fix the climate
Remove all nuclear weapons and uranium from the world
... or I give myself a Holodeck and unlimited pizza
Fix the climate
Remove all nuclear weapons and uranium from the world
... or I give myself a Holodeck and unlimited pizza
I'd go back in time and rewrite the script to Bruce Almighty and change the scene where he's replying to people's prayers as email. It makes no sense in a film otherwise grounded in reality.
I'd give everyone a companion animal like they have in His Dark Materials.
I'd invent a sex reassignment machine that would either automatically or manually resolve GID in one hour.
I'd help a cousin of a friend of mine who has mutism and whose life is being severely impacted by it.
I'd invent a sex reassignment machine that would either automatically or manually resolve GID in one hour.
I'd help a cousin of a friend of mine who has mutism and whose life is being severely impacted by it.
Rookie mistake. Your wishes are in the wrong order. You'd be gone after the first one.
Now we're talking. While we're at it, build in Alethiometers in every TV set, so it'll tell you when someone is lying or whose motives shouldn't be trusted.
1. Give myself immortality with the caveat that I can turn it off if I ever want to and also share it with others. Immortality includes immunity to aging, all diseases and any form of brain problems that may render me in any form of emotional or physical stress (like dementia)
2. Give myself the powers of the infinity gauntlet so I can make resources infinite and also bend reality to remove all hate and make space travel possible. As well as change myself at any point to whatever I wanted to be at the time to allow me to live many different lives.
3. Unify the entirety of earth under one banner, head towards space travel using my previously gained powers.
2. Give myself the powers of the infinity gauntlet so I can make resources infinite and also bend reality to remove all hate and make space travel possible. As well as change myself at any point to whatever I wanted to be at the time to allow me to live many different lives.
3. Unify the entirety of earth under one banner, head towards space travel using my previously gained powers.
Everyone but me has spiders come out of them when they pee or ejaculate.
The dollar loses its value and we watch as society spontaneously combusts
24/7 channel of Rugrats reruns to bring some levity to the hell I have created.
The dollar loses its value and we watch as society spontaneously combusts
24/7 channel of Rugrats reruns to bring some levity to the hell I have created.
That's too dangerous!
Use fear to drive men to do good things. Or just kill off 90% of the men and let woman lead without men breathing down their necks see what happens. Keep the 10% so they can still reproduce to keep humanity going.
Maybe kill off everyone older than 20, and see how kids figure it out. Is capitalism just an inherent human intelligence?
Maybe kill off everyone older than 20, and see how kids figure it out. Is capitalism just an inherent human intelligence?
Change the ocean to pudding.
Bring the moon closer so you'd get massive pudding tides.
Replace everyone's hands with pudding spoons.
Bring the moon closer so you'd get massive pudding tides.
Replace everyone's hands with pudding spoons.
Remake a version of The Last Jedi that everyone loves so I can stop seeing 4 threads a week about how bad it was even though it wasn't bad at all
Not kill, just send them to another dimension where they can all be the worst of humanity together
Damn, the amount of wannabe-Thanoses in this thread is... something.
Personally I'd:
1) Make the existence of a 'god' known so people stop fighting over who's right and who's nota
2) Make all finite resources finite, put hard limits on how much the human race can expand into nature, and remove/revert all prior environmental destruction
3) Attempt to end all kinds of discrimination, conflicts, etc by locking heads of state into a large room together and telling them they can only get out once they've fixed their shit
That scene always bothered me. It wouldn't make sense for Steve Carrell to just read off the teleprompter when it was clearly being hacked, and if he was doing so unwillingly it kind of breaks the "no changing free will," thing because "embarassing yourself on national television" is still very much a matter of free will.
That bit where he forces the cars aside so he can go past; surely 'driving where you want' is considered free will?
Frankly, Morgan Freeman was clearly not doing that great of a job at reigning in Jim Carrey's shenanigans.
Personally I'd:
1) Make the existence of a 'god' known so people stop fighting over who's right and who's nota
2) Make all finite resources finite, put hard limits on how much the human race can expand into nature, and remove/revert all prior environmental destruction
3) Attempt to end all kinds of discrimination, conflicts, etc by locking heads of state into a large room together and telling them they can only get out once they've fixed their shit
That scene always bothered me. It wouldn't make sense for Steve Carrell to just read off the teleprompter when it was clearly being hacked, and if he was doing so unwillingly it kind of breaks the "no changing free will," thing because "embarassing yourself on national television" is still very much a matter of free will.
That bit where he forces the cars aside so he can go past; surely 'driving where you want' is considered free will?
Frankly, Morgan Freeman was clearly not doing that great of a job at reigning in Jim Carrey's shenanigans.
1. Create 50.000 star trek ships and starbases and a ton of Data type androids as their crews who are 100% loyal to me.
2. Make myself and my family immortal, that means immunity to all diseases, invulnerability, no aging and an option to become mortal again (just in case).
3. Create a machine that can pull objects from alternate realities and has an AI that also knows my taste in entertainment, that way I can get all the entertainment I want, 8 seasons of Freaks and Geeks for example (and because the machine knows what I like it won't be a BD set from a reality where Freaks and Geeks, it'll be good stuff.
After my three wishes are done I'll use the star trek ships and their technology to make earth a paradise, unlimited energy and unlimited ressources because of replicators mean we no longer have to exploit and destroy the environment to get them, free future healthcare for everyone. A huge part of the fleet will start exploring the galaxy to find new worlds to colonize.
I won't bother building a moon colony or something like that, if people insist on living on the moon they can get a house on the moon but why live on a dead rock when earth is right next door? I'd only colonize nice planets.
2. Make myself and my family immortal, that means immunity to all diseases, invulnerability, no aging and an option to become mortal again (just in case).
3. Create a machine that can pull objects from alternate realities and has an AI that also knows my taste in entertainment, that way I can get all the entertainment I want, 8 seasons of Freaks and Geeks for example (and because the machine knows what I like it won't be a BD set from a reality where Freaks and Geeks, it'll be good stuff.
After my three wishes are done I'll use the star trek ships and their technology to make earth a paradise, unlimited energy and unlimited ressources because of replicators mean we no longer have to exploit and destroy the environment to get them, free future healthcare for everyone. A huge part of the fleet will start exploring the galaxy to find new worlds to colonize.
I won't bother building a moon colony or something like that, if people insist on living on the moon they can get a house on the moon but why live on a dead rock when earth is right next door? I'd only colonize nice planets.
1. Humans can no longer harm each other
2. Humans can no longer harm any life that started on this planet
3. Resident Evil 4 on Switch
2. Humans can no longer harm any life that started on this planet
3. Resident Evil 4 on Switch