PPV THEME: Let's Fighting Love
(okay not really)
It's that time of year again, when Wrestlemania is done and dusted and it turns out that half its feuds never actually concluded and we have BACKLASH, where feuds finally end and WWE goes back into wheel spinning mode until Summerslam probably.
This year the big hook is that the brand exclusive PPVs are dead once again and now we get the best of both worlds (informed to us via an obnoxious advert of WWE superstars miming song lyrics, also used to sneak female wrestlers in front of the eyes of Saudi Arabian Princes, so scandalous!).
What does this mean for us you ask? Well with the universal championship still missing in action, (presumably buried in Lesnar's washing bin under his sweaty attire for when he needs to clean them for their next use in a couple of months) we can ensure that a world title is always defended on PPV because Smackdown will fill in the gap. Also means that the lower carders get even less chance to sneak in a filler PPV match, Mojo Rawley can already feel himself fading from public consciousness as a result, unfortunately though the same goes for the Revival.
But first...
A brief history of Backlash
1999- Kicking off the trend of Wrestlemania rematches, Austin and Rock did battle for the WWE title but most people mainly just remember the PPV ending when Stephanie McMahon being abducted by The Undertaker via limo.
2000- The REAL Wrestlemania 2000, with one of the best overbooked main events in WWE history of The Rock vs Triple H, monster pops galore, the definitive backlash experience.
2001- The one where Shane O Mac decides to go stage diving and the two man power trip overcome the Brothers of Destruction which pissed me right off at the time.
2002- ONE MORE RUN BROTHER JACK DUDE, HULK STILL RULES *vomits*
2003- Goldberg's first WWE PPV kicking off the run that would lead to him hating this carny business for years to come.
2004- Orton proves himself to the WWE audience by letting Foley brutalise him with thumbtacks, meanwhile we sweep the main event under the rug for it contains he who must not be named.
2005- Oh I never watched this one *looks it up*, sounds like you missed nothing, A WM rematch for Big Dave Drax Batista and Trips.
2006- MAY 19th SAGA IN FULL SWING, Part 34 of the Kane and Big Show forever war. Also God makes his WWE debut to a loss against the McMahon's after HBK let his chosen deity down.
2007- Vince McMahon wins the ECW championship, ushering the era of insane doorag McMahon and confirming once and for all that WWECW was a mistake
2008- A bunch of mania title rematches (adding JBL to the WWE title match for some reason), not much to report unless you really felt cheated out of the full Kane vs Chavo match at WM24
2009- Cena and Edge's blood feud reaches its ultimate climax via a last man standing match that ends with Big Show coming out slam Cena through a spotlight, of course Cena was back days later.
2016- After a long hiatus, Backlash returns, only in September and as Smackdown's first PPV of the current brand split. Becky Lynch becomes the first Smackdown Women's champion (remember when Becky used to win?!) and AJ Styles finally reaches the top of the WWE mountain in an underrated match against that wacky ol' Ambrose. Styles utilises a dick kick to help win which is funny considering his match this year…
2017- Whoever wins, we lose, Orton vs Jinder for the title! The lesser of two evils in the modern day maharajah wins out and the Jinder experiment begins. Elsewhere Nakamura arrives on the main roster with his momentum immediately squandered on Dolph freaking Ziggler.
As you can see, Backlash is and event of highs and lows, surely this year will be better than last year right?
Well let's take a look
PRE SHOW
Bayley vs Ruby Riott
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After over a year of teasing, Bayley and Sasha still haven't fully turned on each other yet, so until WWE actually pulls that damn trigger here's a random match between Bayley and a new addition to the Raw Roster in Ruby Riott. Ruby bested Banks on Raw this week and has her goobers "The Riott squad" in her corner. Will the fractured friendship of Bayley and Banks play a part in tackling the squad? Or is this something completely filleriffic? In any case it could be the best women's match on the show if the kickoff show structure doesn't bugger it.
United States Championship Match
Jeff Hardy (c) vs. Randy Orton
The first of many oddball matches created via the superstar shakeup with a dash of greatest royal rumble to complicate things further. At Wrestlemania Jinder Mahal succeeded in once again besting Orton (and others) to become the champ. Orton would win a number one contenders match (no rematch clause huh?) to set us on the thrilling path to a rematch of last years shocking Backlash main event.
Until the SHAKEUP happened, Jinder got drafted to Raw, had to defend the belt against Jeff, lost it and then also lost his rematch at the greatest royal rumble after being knocked clean out by the sheer wind of a missed whisper in the wind. THEN SHAKEUP INTENSIFIES, Jeff is now on Smackdown with the US title, Orton still has his title shot, thus we have a match.
If any build is testament to how much of a clusterfuck WWE has been this month, this would be the one.
Raw Women's Championship Match
Nia Jax (c) vs. Alexa Bliss
The first mania rematch, Auntie Nia has finally found her true calling as jolly giant face and bested body shaming Bliss to win her first Women's title at mania. So far, so rematch but Bliss has been dropping some enlightening "moments of Bliss" promo segments to reveal how much of a bully Nia really is by height shaming Bliss at Disney Land, this hits too close to home for me as a shorty.
Intercontinental Championship Match
Seth Rollins (c) vs. The Miz
Despite being sent over to Smackdown, Miz invoked his rematch clause and will do battle with the man who took the belt away from him at Wrestlemania in an attempt to bring the IC title over to the now most must see show. Of course SD has the US title so logical booking tells us Miz is kinda screwed here already, so here's a foregone conclusion for you all to enjoy.
I dunno, maybe Balor Club will be watching a monitor at an angle with interest backstage, perpetual grin on his face.
Daniel Bryan vs. Big Cass
BRYAN IS BACK, SMACKDOWN IS STACKED, LOOK AT ALL THOSE DREAM MATCHES!
Wait, those dream matches have been obscured by a 7ft tall shadow, the ultimate heel move is upon us and that's a returning Big Cass getting first dibs on a singles match against Bryan on PPV. Cass cut a shockingly solid promo the other week justifying his reasons for beef with Bryan and then of course the following week undid it all by having one of those "beat up a midget" segments that gives Vinny Mac all the chuckles.
It's a battle of ring rust as two men return to the ring, the true test for if Bryan can still go, can he get a solid match out of Big Cass? Hopefully you can teach that.
Braun Strowman & Bobby Lashley vs. Kevin Owens & Sami Zayn
Last time Bobby Lashley was on WWE PPV I believe he was taking on John Cena for the title in 2007, backstage bullshittery put an end to his WWE tenure just when his almost overpush was reaching its apex, but now he's back and he's kinda clumsy and needs to really find his footing.
So just throw him in against the Yep movement duo with the backup of Braun and hope things work out. Basically a way to get these guys on the card, fine then.
SmackDown Women's Championship Match
Carmella (c) vs. Charlotte Flair
F-A-B-U-L-O-U-S
Against all predictions, the shrieking siren of Satin Island (they say princess but have you heard her in matches?) finally cashed in the MitB to success against Charlotte Flair who was just coming off the high of ending Asuka's undefeated streak. Of course Carmella had the help of NXT callups Billie Kay and Peyton Royce (aka: IIconics, Iconic Duo, Aussie Laycool) but whatever, Mella is money!
Carmella may have mastered the art of chicken shit heel tropes but will a straight one on one match with Charlotte reveal her to be a transitional champion? I'm actually not sure what they'll do here, in any case if Carmella retains she's got a hell of a face roster to contend with so good luck with that.
Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe
"LET ME TELL YOU WHY ROMAN REIGNS IS A FAILURE"
Joe returned after mania to straight up snatch Roman's soul after he lost yet again to Lesnar, leaving Roman with little retort except that this time he'd win against Brock at the Greatest Royal Rumble, Balee Dat.
….except he failed again, thus proving Joe was correct once more. Reigns is trying to hide behind the fact that the cage match ended in controversy and he's actually the real uncrowned universal champ but that's just the desperate claims of a face who has been well and truly owned by the heel.
Basically Reigns is booked like a right lemon right now, I have no idea what they're doing.
Joe got moved to Smackdown but he's still committed to kicking Reigns ass at Backlash, what a trooper. These two do good work together so maybe this is what Reigns needs to get back on track because for being Vince's boy (no amount of promos will convince me otherwise) he sure has looked like trash lately.
No Disqualification WWE Championship Match
AJ Styles (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura
After the Dream Match comes to DREMATCH, or something.
Though the Mania Dream Match was much like having one of those dreams that's just getting interesting before you abruptly wake up and feel great disappointment, Nak's disappointment was enough to go heel by socking AJ in the balls.
Thus began weekly testicular torture from the newly heel Nak who has been a fair bit revitalised by this shift. He maybe got too emotional but we can't get straight answers from him since he forgot how to speak English.
Actually these two had a rematch already at the Greatest Royal Rumble which ended in double count out, so no DQ to the rescue, will AJ finally wear a cup? Will we finally get the four stars we deserve? Will Nak become the first Japanese WWE champion?
Hopefully third time is the charm for their WWE encounters to deliver, the GRR was a strong tease of what we could get so here's hoping.
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This thread brought to you by Glenn Jacobs, "lighting the way for our future"
Remember folks, May 19th is Kane Day, the biggest WWE event of the year!
