Is it weird to speak too formally?

[Umbrella Carp]

I'll be upfront with you Era, I'm quite proficient with the English language. English was the only subject I excelled at in school. I was a typical teenage bum for everything else. For some reason, I have had just zero trouble picking up a formal writing style and extensive vocabulary that regularly gets commented on by my family unprompted. I will actually use a word as complicated as "inebriated" to describe to a loved one something that could be whittled down to "He was drunk and acting stupid" and the message would be across loud and clear. Hell I'm not even sure if this very paragraph is too long.

Like, is it strange or off putting to other people to write and speak like this? My family (read: Grandmother and mother) say that they actually find it impressive, and would if they were strangers......Soooo of course I "Ok Boomer"d that shit and decided I needed a second opinion on Era.

 

[nsilvias]

no but know your audience

 

[Deleted member 2809]

Quite so.

 

[Kurita]

Time
Place
Occasion

 

[ToTheMoon]

Doing anything "too much" is kind of weird by definition.

 

[Rinse Bassfunk]

no but know your audience

Click to shrink...

This is what I was going to say.

In the right environment it's fine but if you aren't adjusting your vocabulary and speaking style to fit the person(s) or situation at least a little you risk alienating some or giving a bad impression

 

[Deleted member 8166]

It is weird yes. But I do it myself so who the fuck cares.

 

[IDontBeatGames]

No it isn't especially if it's who you are but know when and where it's okay to be so formal. It could catch a lot of people off guard especially if they don't understand the meaning of the words you're using. Give people time to get used to you as a person and take it from there.

 

[Gakidou]

This 13 year old poster is adorable!

 

[RedSparrows]

Context.

 

[Weegian]

Yes. There's no harm is having a big vocabulary, but sounding like a thesaurus is off-putting.

 

[Skade]

Depends on the audience really.

Something i like to do when confronted with obnoxious kids or morons is to switch to a very formal way of speaking so i can politely insult them without them understanding half the things i say and thus not really realising they've been insulted.

But otherwise, i tend to be a relaxed potty mouth. I prefer it that way.

 

[big_z]

watch the lobster. speak like that.

 

[PaulloDEC]

I was probably a bit like this when I was a teenager. English was the only subject I was really good at, I watched a lot of classic Doctor Who, etc.

Over time I learned to dial it back. Unless you're hanging out with other English nerds, life's just easier that way.

 

[Deleted member 15240]

The people weirded out by it or making snap judgments because of it are the real weirdos. Fuck 'em.

 

[Daysean]

Its not weird but know who you are talking to
Sadly shit like that does get mocked VERY often behind closed doors and backs

 

[Deleted member 1476]

There's a time and place for everything.

When a close friend is being too formal with me I'll just say "cut the bullshit".

 

[Subpar Scrub]

"Quite proficient with the English language"

Yeah. Speaking/writing too formally without it being the place and time for it is really weird.

 

[Vex]

If you're a proficient in Japanese like I am, and know the Japanese way, it is imperative that you always speak formally. It is seen as extremely shameful to speak up in any other manner and you will most likely get side eyed and thrown out of establishments very quickly. Not to mention your family name will also have a stain on it for all generations that come after. Watch out.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

If you're a proficient in Japanese like I am, and know the Japanese way, it is imperative that you always speak formally. It is seen as extremely shameful to speak up in any other manner and you will most likely get side eyed and thrown out of establishments very quickly. Not to mention your family name will also have a stain on it for all generations that come after. Watch out.

Click to shrink...

Doesn't that depend on the hierarchy though?

 

[Deleted member 15428]

Anyone who uses a sociolect different than what the people around you use is bound to face rejection

 

[Deleted member 8852]

Read the room.

 

[Zelenogorsk]

Instead of "he's inebriated" or "he's drunk" just say "it would appear that our friend is anything but a teetotaler, 'carpe vinum' indeed"

 

[sheaaaa]

No, talk like a normal person. Using unnecessarily verbose words whether in speech or in writing doesn't impress anyone above 21 who's not related to you.

 

[Kitsunebaby]

It can be. If you're constantly using formal speech while others are trying to have a relaxed, casual conversation it's gonna feel awkward. At best it seems kind of stilted, and at worst it might come off as condescending. You don't have to dumb down your vocabulary, but your speech should flow naturally and effortlessly. That is, assuming you're trying to have an enjoyable conversation, and not just trying to show off your "proficient" English skills.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

It can be. If you're constantly using formal speech while others are trying to have a relaxed, casual conversation it's gonna feel awkward. At best it seems kind of stilted, and at worst it might come off as condescending. You don't have to dumb down your vocabulary, but your speech should flow naturally and effortlessly. That is, assuming you're trying to have an enjoyable conversation, and not just trying to show off your "proficient" English skills.

Click to shrink...

Well I'm not conversing like Microsoft SAM 100% of the time, but I will throw in a verbose word every now and then just out of habit. It's how my brain works.

 

[Deleted member 41178]

I'll be upfront with you Era, I'm quite proficient with the English language. English was the only subject I excelled at in school. I was a typical teenage bum for everything else. For some reason, I have had just zero trouble picking up a formal writing style and extensive vocabulary that regularly gets commented on by my family unprompted. I will actually use a word as complicated as "inebriated" to describe to a loved one something that could be whittled down to "He was drunk and acting stupid" and the message would be across loud and clear. Hell I'm not even sure if this very paragraph is too long.

Like, is it strange or off putting to other people to write and speak like this? My family (read: Grandmother and mother) say that they actually find it impressive, and would if they were strangers......Soooo of course I "Ok Boomer"d that shit and decided I needed a second opinion on Era.

Click to shrink...

Since when did inebriated become a "complicated" word.

Its all about knowing your audience.

 

[Aureon]

Archaic words used out of proper context can be great for comedic timing.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

Since when did inebriated become a "complicated" word.

Its all about knowing your audience.

Click to shrink...

Are you reading this thread? People be ribbing me for my use of "proficient".

 

[Dervius]

As others have said, it's a case of knowing the audience and adjusting your speech accordingly. The same goes for writing.

Try not to be quite so sesquipedalian.

 

[Cugel]

No.

 

[Good4Squat]

If other people think it is weird that is their own problem. Communicate how you are most comfortable communicating.

 

[Officer Big Mac]

There was a mod on GAF that sounded like a robot. It came off as self parody.

 

[VaporSnake]

Lol funny you mention the word inebriated, I've definitely used that and people will look at me like "The fuck?" "He's drunk" "Oh....well just say that!

 

[Teenage Fansub]

Inebriated isn't some complicated word. Every adult knows it, they just don't use it outside of particular formal situations.
Sorry, nobody but mum will be impressed.

 

[Xiaomi]

Definitely tone that shit down when trying to make friends, if you're very fastidious about it. It can make you feel like you're trying to hold people at a distance. The moment you start dropping words like "desuetude" and "tendentious" into friendly conversations, you know you have a problem. Do use good punctuation, though. That's always cool.

 

[Rinse Bassfunk]

Are you reading this thread? People be ribbing me for my use of "proficient".

Click to shrink...

Speaking from personal experience, my friends with a somewhat limited vocabulary just get distracted by what may seem to be innocuous language. It's just easier to speak plainly in those situations. Being understood in varying situations is a skill worth learning

 

[VaporSnake]

Inebriated isn't some complicated word. Every adult knows it, they just don't use it outside of particular formal situations.
Sorry, nobody but mum will be impressed.

Click to shrink...

Absolutely isn't the case, know countless adults that don't/didn't know what it meant.

 

[shaneo632]

Honestly I would probably find it a bit offputting. It would make me think you're showing off/being pretentious.

If someone in my social group said inebriated without their tongue poking in their cheek I would be a bit baffled.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

Definitely tone that shit down when trying to make friends, if you're very fastidious about it. It can make you feel like you're trying to hold people at a distance. The moment you start dropping words like "desuetude" and "tendentious" into friendly conversations, you know you have a problem. Do use good punctuation, though. That's always cool.

Click to shrink...

Luckily for me I didn't know what any of those words were until 5 seconds ago so maybe I'm not forever lost.

It seems to me like a fine line to walk for someone like me who just does it....because, and not because I'm trying to show off or be pretentious. Like that right there "Pretentious", it comes across like a "big" word and yet so many use it.

 

[Wackamole]

Affirmative.

 

[Roxas]

As everyone said... Know your audience. I speak in a more 'formal' lingo most of the time, specially at work, but when I'm with friends I try to keep it simple

 

[Patitoloco]

There was a mod on GAF that sounded like a robot. It came off as self parody.

Click to shrink...

I'm not sure if it was a mod, but I remember the dude with Ribery's avatar, which always ended his posts with:

Yours,
Franck

What a damn dumb idea to have as your Internet persona.

 

[Teenage Fansub]

If you're self conscious about it or even really noticing, I don't know how casual it could actually be for you.
Speak like a regular dumb dumb and you might feel more relaxed :)

edit: Become a poet. That's a great excuse for randomly plugging in smarty words.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

If you're self conscious about it or even really noticing, I don't know how casual it could actually be for you.
Speak like a regular dumb dumb and you might feel more relaxed :)

Click to shrink...

That's the thing, I didn't take much notice of it until recently. My family have been commenting on my style of talking for a long time. The fact that my friends never have from memory probably says something.

 

[Doober]

Hell, I feel weird for using mostly complete sentences and passable grammar in text and social media.

To this day I find it strange that 30-50 year-old people use text speak and tons of emojis.

 

[Umbrella Carp]

If you're self conscious about it or even really noticing, I don't know how casual it could actually be for you.
Speak like a regular dumb dumb and you might feel more relaxed :)

edit: Become a poet. That's a great excuse for randomly plugging in smarty words.

Click to shrink...

Oh man, I must be way more ignorant than I thought. I NEVER imagined this would be such a big deal in social spheres. No wonder I'm a loner.

 

[OG Kush]

If someone used the word "Inebriated" to describe someone as drunk, I would think they were a narc.

 

[Teenage Fansub]

Oh man, I must be way more ignorant than I thought. I NEVER imagined this would be such a big deal in social spheres. No wonder I'm a loner.

Click to shrink...

Watch The Beach Bum. Everyone loves a poet.

 

[Geoff]

Do what you want to do but remember that brevity is the soul of wit. You can get away with verbosity if you have a certain style to go along with it but mostly it just comes off as pompous and affected.