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Ninja has some harsh words about Fortnite ‘rehab’ and parental responsibility
- Thread starter Deleted member 2172
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That's the thing though, we are talking about a videogame here. Of course addiction can form without parents noticing, but with videogames it's increasingly more unlikely than with most other things. Because they need a phoene or a console to do this. Mobile gaming is a problem in that regard, but there are measures against that. Build in parental controls, just phones that can't run the newest craze etc.
I'm the one being condescending? I'm not the one telling people they don't know what they are talking about.
You are severely underestimating the lengths an addict will go to feed their addiction, which I'm surprised by since you are a recovering addict yourself. This type of addiction is actually far more difficult to detect than a drug addiction in many cases, because it can be mistaken for relatively normal behaviors, unlike drug use.
The subject of this thread are kids who are clearly at the point where they need professional help, hence why they are in rehab. Yes, there are things parents can do to limit the likelihood that their child becomes addicted to something, but parents are not omniscient and they cannot be everywhere at once, so inevitably even the kids of good, involved parents will sometimes become addicts, despite their parents' efforts to prevent that.
Your interpretation of the mod post is incorrect. At no point did Volimar or any other mod tell parents not to participate. Instead, the mod post was directed towards the parents and others who were doing exactly what you claimed Volimar did with that mod post: telling people with opinions and their own viewpoints to not participate in the thread. In fact, Volimar made his personal opinion crystal clear with this post:
For the record, Volimar did not ban AdolRed. All of our bans are made after a group discussion. We stand by the decision to ban AdolRed for his comments following the mod post.
I'm going to sit firmly on the fence with this one, because I can definitely see it from both sides.
As a parent gaming can provide a way to get a moments peace, and even without intent you can end up letting your kids spend way more time on games then you even intended. For example, my wife and I only let our kids (mostly my 10 year old son) play on the PS4 on the weekends. However he wakes up at 6:00 AM and despite my best intentions, there are times when I need to lie in at least till 8 god forbid I ever make it to 9. By the time I have had a cup of coffee and made breakfast for everyone, it can easily be pushing 10 before I've realized hes been on the computer most of the morning (and if not playing, watching youtube videos about playing). Repeat that on Sunday and hes playing for 8 hours a weekend and I swore that I would never let my kids play that much.
We've actually banned them from technology this weekend, as both kids have been getting a bit /mouthy recently. And as much as it is a punishment to them, it feels like a punishment to my wife and I more.
As a parent gaming can provide a way to get a moments peace, and even without intent you can end up letting your kids spend way more time on games then you even intended. For example, my wife and I only let our kids (mostly my 10 year old son) play on the PS4 on the weekends. However he wakes up at 6:00 AM and despite my best intentions, there are times when I need to lie in at least till 8 god forbid I ever make it to 9. By the time I have had a cup of coffee and made breakfast for everyone, it can easily be pushing 10 before I've realized hes been on the computer most of the morning (and if not playing, watching youtube videos about playing). Repeat that on Sunday and hes playing for 8 hours a weekend and I swore that I would never let my kids play that much.
We've actually banned them from technology this weekend, as both kids have been getting a bit /mouthy recently. And as much as it is a punishment to them, it feels like a punishment to my wife and I more.
You're out of line, and being disrespectful. To claim that a parent fucked up by letting a depressed kid play a videogame that makes them happy to THEN see that the kid has developed an addiction is EXACTLY what I said it was.
You're being hostile. Knock it off.
Edit #2: And exactly what does 'knowing you' have to do with my statement, or your response?
At NO point was I being condescending towards you. If you read my post without bringing your anger, ego, defensiveness, or whatever other lens you're looking at it through, you wouldn't have responded the way you did.
Woa first time Reset Era and I agree on something, he's definitely right. There are definitely psychological issues you should take your kid to a specialist if they are highly addictive to certain things, but you are also the parent and should be able to deal with these issues.
I mean in what scenario will the kid be able to get their videogame fix with the measures I mentioned?
Maybe it's because I'd be more aware of videogame addiction due to personal circumstances and would be alarmed as soon my kid was showing certain behaviours. I get that not every parent can be up to the case 100%, depending on their schedules, their background with addiction (videogame addiction in particular) and so on all the time and that it still might happen even if you give your best. But I also know that a lot of parents just shove a smartphone into their kids face so they leave them alone as some sort of high tech pacifier, at super young ages too and don't check on what their kids are doing in their room or at friends or...in general at all.
So, my wife and I are strict about 8 am, and that's for waking us up (for anything like TV or games). We also set up activities (swim classes, mostly) for Saturday mornings, and errands, etc. My son will absolutely get to play (pending acceptable behavior and performance), but it's a privilege, not a right. We've removed access for a weekend before, and it's worked, but it's definitely a balance, I hear you.
I have a perfectly fine discussion in here with someone who didn't just tell me I don't know what I'm talking about. Maybe learn some respect yourself before you expect it from others.
Telling me I don't know what I'm talking about despite not knowing me or my past (yes, that matters, believe it or not), telling me I bring my ego in this or that I'm being defensive "or whatever lens I'm looking at it" (you just ran out of generic descriptors there to dismiss my opinion) is disrespectful alright.
I'd always respond to people who do that like this, no matter what mood I'm in, because I can't stand it.
Ok, so in the scenario you've described, we have a kid whose parents have prevented them from:
1. Using a game console
2. Using a phone
3. Using a school computer or device for anything other than school work
4. Going to the public library
5. Going to friends' houses
6. Using any other devices in the home by keeping them all under lock and key
7. One parent always being home to monitor the behavior of the child
To start, all of this that you've laid out is an insanely monumental task, and completely impossible to enforce in single-parent household or if the school is uncooperative, both of which are likely. But I'm going to humor you and say that somehow, the parents have managed to do all these things you've outlined. In that case, the kid could still have a device that the parents are unaware of, and be using that to engage in the addiction. This device could be procured from a friend or another kid at school pretty easily, and easily hidden from the parents and used only when the parents aren't around/are asleep.
On top of that, the level of resentment the child is going to feel for their parent is going to be huge, and the underlying causes of the addiction are not being addressed. That is a recipe for disaster, and highly increases the likelihood that the child will lash out.
Ok I understand you more. Sorry if i came off as mean at all. Thanks for not lashing out at me for it.
How does describing a classic case of addiction bolster your point that parents should be able to stop it from manifesting in the first place?
That's the thing: addiction typically crosses a series of blurry lines in order to strike at the people who are most susceptible to it. "My kid and their friends love playing this game" may not become "wait, this is dangerous" until it's actually too late. The problem is that certain signs are inherently ambiguous and don't obviously telegraph themselves as dangerous; actually, in most cases, diagnosing addiction from them would be a massive overreaction.
Catching addiction is neither easy nor straightforward, and failing to do so doesn't imply anything about your quality as a parent.
Because I've played fortnite. A lot. And I also played Halo 2 online way back in the day and many other older PC online games with micro transactions. Nothing has changed, the games are as addicting as they were a decade plus ago, parents just aren't stopping children UNTIL they have gone too far.
The moment you notice your kid is spending more time than you would want them to on a game, put on the parental controls and stop that shit. Nothing has changed.
LoL Yep ... Ninja seems like generally good human being. most parents don't seem to understand that you are your child's primary teacher and need to spend time with them and use discipline and routine on a daily basis.
I dont know if I'm right or wrong in about 95 percent of my parental decisions but in my opinion each kid needs to be evaluated on how to handle certain situations with them. As a father of 3 each of my kids respond completely different on discipline and I think that needs to be taken into consideration when parenting.
Personally, growing up I never got in trouble for playing outside all day but once the NES came into the household I would get it taken away from me for playing it too much.
Every now and then I make my kids go out and play, but as a gamer myself I find it unjustified to keep my kids from playing games if they wanted to.
Personally, growing up I never got in trouble for playing outside all day but once the NES came into the household I would get it taken away from me for playing it too much.
Every now and then I make my kids go out and play, but as a gamer myself I find it unjustified to keep my kids from playing games if they wanted to.
Bullshit. You're the one that told me I was talking out of my ass, in response to me highlighting a statement and saying that it demonstrated a lack of understanding of how addiction manifests itself.
Nothing to do with your 'past', because it wasn't an insult.
You're hostile, and you're not interested in discussing. You just said I was talking out of my ass, which demonstrates that you WERE angry, or egocentric, otherwise you wouldn't have thrown an insult at me. And THAT was the context I was using it in. You wouldn't have told me I was talking out of my ass if you weren't feeling insulted. Continue to pile on low-key insults if you want, and feel free to add as many 'generic descriptors' as you like. You're only demonstrating how out of line you are.
The resentment line of thinking can fuck off. Parents let their children walk all over them to a higher degree than was acceptable when i was a child and that is a huge part of why people can't be effective parents anymore. Sometimes being a good parent means having your children resent you; if you can't handle this then don't have kids.
Your here to be a fucking parent not their best friend.
#DisciplineIsDead
You are misunderstanding my point. The resentment leads to lashing out, aka other behavior problems manifesting that the parent then has to deal with. Obviously kids are going to 'resent' being disciplined by their parents, and in a normal situation they will get over it. Addiction is an entirely different beast, the level of resentment and lashing out that results from preventing an addicts access to their addiction is not even remotely comparable to normal consequences for normal behavioral issues.
Not exactly, no:
1. Using a console while unsupervised at home (via locking it away if necessary)
2. Restricting the phone. Parental apps, not buying the newwest model that can run Fortnite. Never said anything about prevening the usage entirely
3. Checking with the school there isn't Fortnite installed on the computers. The school should be able to handle that. No other form of checking needed. School computers should be for work, yes.
4. If my kid is going to the public libarary daily I'm pretty sure it's not for studying, so yes, let them not go to the libary daily.
5. They can go to friends houses if I know they aren't left unchecked playing Fortnite for hours. A simple talk with the other parents solves that. If they are not willing to, my kid can't go there. I'm sure there will be parents willing to. Again never said anything of preventing them to go to firiend's houses entirely.
6. There are no other devices. Either you are at home and can check on your kid playing their playstation or you are not and don't let them by locking it away if you already have a hunch the kid overdoes it. Playing on the phone is not possible without you tpying in the code to let them play for a set time, so you don't have to check on much.
7. If no parent is at home the kid doesn't have a playstation to play with because it's locked away, yes.
Why do you act like I made the points you typed out there? I never said you should prevent them from using phones entirely. Come on. The only possibility that's actually unchecked here and you didn't even bring up is them going to friends while you are not at home and the friend's parents aren't either.
Most of the stuff I listed is relatively basic parenting. Install a parental control app on the phone, check from time to time what you kid is doing when you're home, talk with school authorities about your concerns of your kid playing at school, make sure what households your kid is visiting when visiting friends...
Of course some parents don't have to the ability to do all that all the time, single parents, parents with awful job schedules, and of course sometimes it happens even when you do all that, but I'm willing to bet a lot of these addictions come from simple negligence.
You didn't actually address anything in that post. "It's hard for me to be resented by my child, so I feel forced to appease them..." isn't a point that it made at all.
That's fine but the fear of resentment from the child does cause many parents to be pushovers. I've seen it firsthand from some of my good friends and it bugs the every living shit out of me.
Addiction can take many shapes and the topic needs nuance. I agree with that. I believe that in some cases that parents can see addiction where there is nothing but a child who knows they always get what they want.
Worthless post. Find something better to do.
So why are people talking like he is giving one serious parenting advice. He is just stating that he believe the parents are not doing enough to stop this kind of thing from happening. Take their game away is just a simple way of saying it. I agree fully just calling them terrible was a little tactless.
Yes Addiction can be a mental health issue but these are children and parents hold the greatest influence on their daily lives and development.
You may feel I don't understand addiction that's okay, I think I do and I believe Video game Addiction in children is much easier to prevent with close monitoring and frequent communication than other forms
Yes Addiction can be a mental health issue but these are children and parents hold the greatest influence on their daily lives and development.
You may feel I don't understand addiction that's okay, I think I do and I believe Video game Addiction in children is much easier to prevent with close monitoring and frequent communication than other forms
No need for hostility, and also the world changes along with the technology. To simply deprive the child of ALL gaming access is just a really ignorant thing to say. You can bet your ass that your kid will hate you for a long fucking time, and that's no good for any household, this is going to generate a bad atmosphere in the family that can and will affect everyone's emotional state.
Also I don't think you understand parent-son/daughter relationship. I was raised in a abusive household where I didn't get any love from my parents since they were always away for work and they took everything that was fun for me while I was alone (with the excuse that it was better for me) and I resent them to this day and I feel everyday a huge hole in my consciousness for not having a good relationship with my parents while my friends around me says stuff about their parents and how they would play with them and have fun.
You can still teach your children while also being a loveable and compassionate parent. Of course, lines have to be drawn, but to not show them love is a recipe for disaster.
I thought you were suggesting that parents take the most extreme measures to prevent access to the addictive behavior. If that's not what you are suggesting, then that is going to be even less effective in preventing the behavior than what I thought you were suggesting. You also didn't address the device that a parent is not aware of, which is a significant problem and something I used as a teen to prevent my parents from noticing my addiction. All of the limitations I laid out in that post are limitations my parents did place on me, and even with those limitations I was able to engage in addictive behaviors...because the only way to stop the addiction was to get psychological help. That's what I'm trying to explain to you, because the way I engaged in my addictive behaviors used the same methods a kid who is addicted to video games would use.
I'm not talking about parents who fear their child's resentment. Nerokis is right, you didn't address my point at all.
You can love doing something in moderation and parents have a lot of tools to make sure it's in moderation when it comes to videogames. Obviously certain signs are ambiguous and not immediately identifiable as dangerous, but if those signs appear in general I'd rather take previntive measures and take my kid being pissed at me rather than see it out to make the child happy short-term and have the risks. Maybe that's being overly protective, but I'd rather be protective than have to send my child into rehab. Obviously that won't work all the time, but if you are trying to argue most of the cases described in the OP aren't due to negligance I won't be able to agree with you.
This is the tricky part. Ninja is right to an extent, but especially when Fortnite is available on mobile it's not as simple as confiscating the games console.
I have a friend who is a mother of two, and she was venting about Grand Theft Auto last year and why a game so shamelessly violent is allowed to exist given the number of kids who play it. I suggested it should be up to parents to monitor that, and she explained that her kids had been playing GTA3 at school on one of their friend's iPads. That really made me stop and think. It's a different era to when I was at school, and mobile gaming was Pokemon on a Game Boy. Now all it takes is one kid in a class to have parents who give them a mobile device without parental restrictions set up properly, and your kids might come home and tell you about the prostitutes they slept with at lunch time =S
Haha. Sorry, man. Correcting a misunderstanding is a valid way to participate in a discussion. If you can't handle being corrected, don't make posts.
Don't let your kids walk all over you = deprive them of ALL gaming access. Does that make sense? NO
Some of you I swear will read a post, put in your own thoughts, and then respond to both at once.
I had loving parents. I also knew they wouldn't let me get away with anything I wanted to. Its OBVIOUSLY a balance.
It's like you've never seen anyone go on a tangent before. Amazing.
He's not wrong, not entirely right either though. I've read plenty stories of kids who's parents did try and take the kids game away, turn off the internet etc. Yet the kids found ways of still playing. So while it's definitely true that a lot of parent's need to be better at taking control of their kids gaming habits if they're spiraling out of control, however some of the time it just won't be enough
Stop attacking them, they were completely right. You misunderstood my post, and you response to my post still didn't address what I actually said.
I went on a tangent about parents now wanting to be resented. I'm not trying to address the entire post. It was by design.
I could've picked any number of posts that mentioned "you will be resented" but most unfortunately for me I chose your post.
Then why would you even respond to my post with that? It didn't add anything to the conversation.
Lol it makes me chuckle all these comments thinking a parent should interact 100% of the time with their kids.
Like that's not healthy either.
And even in moderation with the hooks that these games have these days it's hard to stop your kid getting addicted.
I'll tell you my anecdotal story so you can see where I'm coming from and call me a bad parent.
We bought our son (now 13) an Xbox one around three years ago and we set it up in his room but monitored what he was doing by popping in to make sure he was ok, it started off so well. he played FIFA 15, FIFA ultimate team mainly so you can guess he was wanting to buy fifa packs, I explained to him how the odds are stacked against him and he still wanted to spend his money on it, we allowed him to spend £10 here or there, in the packs he opened he got nothing.
He eventually got bored of FIFA and realised he was never going to get Messi, so stopped playing. He eventually got into Overwatch and loved it, he was loving the skins and whatnot but eventually it was seeming like he was more interested in the slight buzz of getting epic skins, he also wanted to be spending more money on Xbox points to buy even more boxes, so I once again explained to him the odds etc and we once again let him have his £10 or so every once in a while, it was with this game it started going a little wonky.
His time was limited to maybe 5-6 hours through the week after his homework was done and maybe 4 hours on Saturday afternoon, but he was constantly wanting to level up and to earn more boxes, we eventually twigged he was gaming at 1/2 for a couple of hours in the morning as my girlfriend heard him, we had to take his controller out of his room and put a password in his sign in.
Things settled down, and then he got into Fortnite. We still had the restrictions in place on his Xbox but the problem was he was now creeping downstairs to play on my Xbox which had all the family accounts signed in, and he was once again doing this at night.
You see it's not so simple as to simply blanket all parents to blame for this, and seeking help is IMHO a far better solution.
Yeah I grew up in the 80's gaming lots as well, but games are so much different now than the ones I played and the social pressure of instagram videos and YouTubers showing off the latest skins is all psychological effects that you can't necessarily spot as a parent.
The breaking point came when had cleaned out his savings to buy vbucks for levels and skins, when challenged he denied it but we obviously had the confirmation emails from MS. A month or so later he took my bank card out of my wallet to buy vbucks (only £20) when I went out to pick his brother up, I flipped and took his Xbox out of his room and he hasn't had it back since (this was August time) and he's banned from Fortnite period.
Like that's not healthy either.
And even in moderation with the hooks that these games have these days it's hard to stop your kid getting addicted.
I'll tell you my anecdotal story so you can see where I'm coming from and call me a bad parent.
We bought our son (now 13) an Xbox one around three years ago and we set it up in his room but monitored what he was doing by popping in to make sure he was ok, it started off so well. he played FIFA 15, FIFA ultimate team mainly so you can guess he was wanting to buy fifa packs, I explained to him how the odds are stacked against him and he still wanted to spend his money on it, we allowed him to spend £10 here or there, in the packs he opened he got nothing.
He eventually got bored of FIFA and realised he was never going to get Messi, so stopped playing. He eventually got into Overwatch and loved it, he was loving the skins and whatnot but eventually it was seeming like he was more interested in the slight buzz of getting epic skins, he also wanted to be spending more money on Xbox points to buy even more boxes, so I once again explained to him the odds etc and we once again let him have his £10 or so every once in a while, it was with this game it started going a little wonky.
His time was limited to maybe 5-6 hours through the week after his homework was done and maybe 4 hours on Saturday afternoon, but he was constantly wanting to level up and to earn more boxes, we eventually twigged he was gaming at 1/2 for a couple of hours in the morning as my girlfriend heard him, we had to take his controller out of his room and put a password in his sign in.
Things settled down, and then he got into Fortnite. We still had the restrictions in place on his Xbox but the problem was he was now creeping downstairs to play on my Xbox which had all the family accounts signed in, and he was once again doing this at night.
You see it's not so simple as to simply blanket all parents to blame for this, and seeking help is IMHO a far better solution.
Yeah I grew up in the 80's gaming lots as well, but games are so much different now than the ones I played and the social pressure of instagram videos and YouTubers showing off the latest skins is all psychological effects that you can't necessarily spot as a parent.
The breaking point came when had cleaned out his savings to buy vbucks for levels and skins, when challenged he denied it but we obviously had the confirmation emails from MS. A month or so later he took my bank card out of my wallet to buy vbucks (only £20) when I went out to pick his brother up, I flipped and took his Xbox out of his room and he hasn't had it back since (this was August time) and he's banned from Fortnite period.
I'm really curious what addiction you are talking about since I wonder if it's really as applicable to videogames as you are suggesting but it's obvious you don't want to mention it so let's leave it at that.
If my child has the money to get a phone they can play Fortnite on without me being aware of said phone then I made a mistake there as well.
I was suggesting measures that prevent the child getting addicted in the first place. Addiction isn't something that happens from one second to the other, would you agree with that? (not saying those measures are working 100% of the time of course, nor that they are applicable by every parent). Obviously if I have to take measures like locking up the console all the time and my kid, for example, is throwing fits every time I say no they can't play, the kid is already addicted and nothing of what I meantioned would be of help, because even if it did prevent the kid from feeding the addiction, the addiction wouldn't go away.
I could've picked any number of posts that mentioned "you will be resented" but most unfortunately for me I chose your post.
I'll be sure to never quote you again if something in your post makes me want to go on a tangent Capiche?
Also feel free to ignore me or my opinions. Its free and easy to do.
I think it's extremely simplistic to consider all of the burden on parents. Obviously many cases will involve slapdash parenting, but it's amazing to see the degree to which people absolve gaming companies of all responsibility for their products which are addictive in nature, particularly when the anger against some specific practices (e.g. loot boxes) is so extreme. Fortnite is designed to be addictive. Save the World is modeled on the most effective free to play games despite bearing a price tag. Battle Royale may not have the contentious loot llamas, but daily challenges and battle passes are schemes designed to get people logging on and playing habitually rather than when and how they actually want.
It's not Epic or Fortnite that should be questioned though, it's modern gaming as a whole - what Fortnite does is nothing unusual. As gamers we should not be as free market ideologues acting as if every criticism of our hobby and this industry is an attack on us or an existential threat to gaming. Trying to curb the negative externalities of gaming is as much the games industry's responsibility as the gamer's (or the gamer's parents).
It's not Epic or Fortnite that should be questioned though, it's modern gaming as a whole - what Fortnite does is nothing unusual. As gamers we should not be as free market ideologues acting as if every criticism of our hobby and this industry is an attack on us or an existential threat to gaming. Trying to curb the negative externalities of gaming is as much the games industry's responsibility as the gamer's (or the gamer's parents).
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Very good point. I don't absolve the companies of responsibilty but I've kinda lost hope that anyone will reign them in. Maybe the FTC investigation will lead to something positive but I think for now parents have to monitor their children closely for signs of addiction and do their best to try and never let it get to that point.
I've been addicted to many things in my life but I truly feel that my parents limiting my gaming time (and telling me why they did it) helped me control my desire to play video games at all times of the day. Obviously I'm not everyone and I may just not be predisposed to gaming addiction as much as chemicals.
I've talked about it on here before, I don't really like talking about it much but this is pretty much the only place I can other than with my therapist due to the relative anonymity of the forum. I'm a recovering sex/pornography addict, my addiction started when I was twelve. The reason why I'm saying they are similar is because the way I engaged in the addictive behaviors is similar to how someone would engage in a video game addiction, I used the same devices to engage in my addiction (phones, computers, iPods, consoles) as a video game addict would to engage in theirs. I was abused through World of Warcraft and other online/social games.
Sorry if I was rude, this is an emotional topic for me and your response seemed really flippant. I'm still open to having a discussion if you are.
Look, it's not that simple.
It's not about games being as addicting as before, which is wrong because GaaS nowadays gives you plenty of incentives to keep playing. It's also about kids who develop an addiction to games. Real bonafide addiction.
There's already research being done and thankfully, it looks like the number of kids who can get addicted are low (1%), but giving parents the option to help their children get over the addiction is always good.
The problem with Ninja's tweet is that it glazed over this. It's similar to how the majority of people aren't addicted to gambling but is it as easy as that they should just suck it up and stop gambling? Should we close down all gambling rehabs because the majority of people do not have this problem?
Now some people may be right that the children who are addicted may have underlying mental problems that helps exacerbate it. Still most parents arent actually mental health professionals who knows what to do in these type of situations.
First of all please note that I don't want to call you a bad parent, I just want to note a few things.
Obviously you can't prevent your kid from playing certain modes in a game but personally I would not have let him spend even a dime on this, not matter how often he asked. Firstly because we all know how these things are designed to make you addicted (it always starts with 10 bucks) and secondly because a 13 year old usually has no idea about the worth of money and how to use it responsibly. Heck, a lot of adults don't, but kids in general don't.
Again, why did you give him the money? All it does is giving him the impression it's alright and incentivizes spending without having a clue where the money comes from.
Yeah at this point it's already clear he has a massive problem...sorry to hear that.
Of course seeking help is the better solution, I don't really see anyone arguing against that if the kid is already at that point.
It really sucks and is just another burden on the parents to watch out for.
Sorry for for your situation anyway. Did you take him to therapy? Taking his Xbox away was definetly the right thing to do it doesn't make the problem go away.
Gaming is an expensive luxury where I reside. So it may be simplistic but I believe parents hold greatest responsibility. Yeah shit happens but when its a child involved i cant fully blame a company that provides luxury entertainment with a straight face.
he said it in a very simple manner but he is right.
This was back in early 2016 and early in the OW cycle, wefigured well why not, I explained to him the value of money and that it's his Xmas/birthday money gone on nothing of value and the design of these systems as I am highly against them and always have been, that's why we allowed it, little did we know the damage it would do.
No we have not taken him to a professional.
And it's seemingly what the whole ninja thing is based on, it's like he's saying no need for rehab just take the console away you bad parent
Ah got you. That sucks to hear, hope you're at a better place in life at the moment. Yeah I can see how they are similar for sure. Would you agree with the rest I wrote? All these measures I proposed are preventive ones. I'm not saying they work all the time or that all paretns have the time to enagage in them, and obviously if it spiraled out of control already like in your case therapy is the only solution, but I'm still willing to bet a lof of these cases are just paretns who let their kids hang on the phone 24/7 so they themselves aren't bothered by them.
THis is a bit off topic but if you can have you talked with a pedo-psychiatrist? The bolded part are some really big red flags. Obviously without talking with with your child and you it is a bit a moot point but, imo, You are a case that is worth asking if behavioral therapy is worth undertaking.