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NYT opinion: The pursuit of excellence has infiltrated and corrupted the world of leisure
- Thread starter fleeting
- Start date
Social media has certainly amplified this. There's always someone better than you at something. Problem is, back in the day, truly exceptional people were either famous, or they'd never interfere with your life. Nowadays, every John Doe who's really good at something is on FB or YT. You will be compared to them.
And because everyone can be compared to so many others, we get the creeping feeling that we're never enough. And this can influence your social life and relationships. With so many people to choose from and at a touch's distance on your phone, why would anyone choose you if you're not the best? Only 20 years ago people were much happier to settle. Not anymore. Every age feels like high school, you're constantly scrutinized, weighted, compared, judged. The "alphas" are noisier than ever.
And because everyone can be compared to so many others, we get the creeping feeling that we're never enough. And this can influence your social life and relationships. With so many people to choose from and at a touch's distance on your phone, why would anyone choose you if you're not the best? Only 20 years ago people were much happier to settle. Not anymore. Every age feels like high school, you're constantly scrutinized, weighted, compared, judged. The "alphas" are noisier than ever.
I guess I'm still guilty of this though getting less so as I get older.
I put off learning guitar for years because I thought I was too old but bought one a couple of years ago and self taught through YT and the internet. I'm good enough to play songs well enough that it makes me happy and that's enough.
OTOH I want a mountain bike as the region in live in has some of the best MB trails in Scotland and even more just within driving distance but have held off for ages because cycling has become the refuge of elitist bores rocking £5000 worth of gear and sleeping in Team Sky gear. There's almost an expectation that you have to have expensive kit to even enter the sport
I put off learning guitar for years because I thought I was too old but bought one a couple of years ago and self taught through YT and the internet. I'm good enough to play songs well enough that it makes me happy and that's enough.
OTOH I want a mountain bike as the region in live in has some of the best MB trails in Scotland and even more just within driving distance but have held off for ages because cycling has become the refuge of elitist bores rocking £5000 worth of gear and sleeping in Team Sky gear. There's almost an expectation that you have to have expensive kit to even enter the sport
I experienced this on the internet in artist circles before the current ubiquity of the modern kind of social media and it caused me to stop drawing for almost a decade. Woe to think of how intense it is now.
There was such a backlash against kids who were overly sensitive and would scream IT'S JUST MY STYLE in response to reasonable critique. But that was also seen as someone making an "excuse to be bad at art". That was the subtext under the mockery.
No one thought about how all those hours spent making fun of "bad art" and "bad artists" and their "excuses to be bad at art" on webcomic hosting sites or DeviantArt would have a collateral effect on me.
It made me not want to say "yeah I'm not good at this and I'm not really in it to get better", because, among my peers who were in it to get better, that would mean I'd be the kind of person they made fun of — a person who had no respect for myself, no respect for art, and no respect for effort, and thus deserved to be ridiculed.
So I stopped drawing. :/
I moved entirely to creative pursuits I did want to put the time and effort into becoming proficient at (music, games). But I used to draw all the time. Reading this article, I cried a bit remembering how much I used to love drawing. It was one of my absolute favorite pastimes as a kid. And that's what it was — a pastime. I feel like the internet kinda took that from me.
Even now with more maturity and hindsight, I've had fun picking up the pencil again recently, but I haven't been able to bring myself to do it without the excuse of it being supplemental to something else I'm doing "for real" i.e. game concept art, music cover art.
There was such a backlash against kids who were overly sensitive and would scream IT'S JUST MY STYLE in response to reasonable critique. But that was also seen as someone making an "excuse to be bad at art". That was the subtext under the mockery.
No one thought about how all those hours spent making fun of "bad art" and "bad artists" and their "excuses to be bad at art" on webcomic hosting sites or DeviantArt would have a collateral effect on me.
It made me not want to say "yeah I'm not good at this and I'm not really in it to get better", because, among my peers who were in it to get better, that would mean I'd be the kind of person they made fun of — a person who had no respect for myself, no respect for art, and no respect for effort, and thus deserved to be ridiculed.
So I stopped drawing. :/
I moved entirely to creative pursuits I did want to put the time and effort into becoming proficient at (music, games). But I used to draw all the time. Reading this article, I cried a bit remembering how much I used to love drawing. It was one of my absolute favorite pastimes as a kid. And that's what it was — a pastime. I feel like the internet kinda took that from me.
Even now with more maturity and hindsight, I've had fun picking up the pencil again recently, but I haven't been able to bring myself to do it without the excuse of it being supplemental to something else I'm doing "for real" i.e. game concept art, music cover art.
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This is so true. I really like to read about cinema and its history, but in my circle of friends, it is very tiring since everyone thinks you must write a review about every movie or TV show you watch. People talking over and over and over about photography, ''homages'' to other mainstream directors, and fucking long takes. And of course, sport hating Netflix originals.
Not to mention the need of having a supposedly ''refined taste'' that most of the time don't even reach art/independent films, but mostly is composed of people saying how Nolan's Batman Trilogy is one of the biggest cinematic masterpieces ever made. Can't we just... Enjoy watching stuff and not over analyze it?
I also play the piano and sing and it ALSO was a competition. Apparently, you can't play or sing anymore without having a YT channel with your covers to ''prove it'' - studio techniques and equipment for recording obligatory. Or if you write, you must publish it online and gather a ''social media following''. And drawing - only digital drawing is ''valid''. And reading - you are not allowed to read things translated into your native language if you understand English, because apparently, every translation is trash. And people classifying every book into tropes and talking about goddamn Joseph Campbell over and over again.
I feel all my hobbies were kinda tainted by this to some extent and this even mined my pleasure in doing it. It's easy to say ''just get over it'' but it's something hard to dodge, feeling like you are not good enough, ''why you bother'' thoughts creeping inside your mind when you just want to share your hobbies and interests with other people and online communities. Maybe the right way to enjoy hobbies is doing everything offline, strictly by yourself.
Not to mention the need of having a supposedly ''refined taste'' that most of the time don't even reach art/independent films, but mostly is composed of people saying how Nolan's Batman Trilogy is one of the biggest cinematic masterpieces ever made. Can't we just... Enjoy watching stuff and not over analyze it?
I also play the piano and sing and it ALSO was a competition. Apparently, you can't play or sing anymore without having a YT channel with your covers to ''prove it'' - studio techniques and equipment for recording obligatory. Or if you write, you must publish it online and gather a ''social media following''. And drawing - only digital drawing is ''valid''. And reading - you are not allowed to read things translated into your native language if you understand English, because apparently, every translation is trash. And people classifying every book into tropes and talking about goddamn Joseph Campbell over and over again.
I feel all my hobbies were kinda tainted by this to some extent and this even mined my pleasure in doing it. It's easy to say ''just get over it'' but it's something hard to dodge, feeling like you are not good enough, ''why you bother'' thoughts creeping inside your mind when you just want to share your hobbies and interests with other people and online communities. Maybe the right way to enjoy hobbies is doing everything offline, strictly by yourself.
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This is one of the top ten weirdest posts I've seen here.
Load up your software, grab your guitar, or take whatever you've been using to make music and play around with it for 10 minutes. You'll probably feel better after that.
With weightlifting, don't think for a second that your 20s are your prime unless you are competing. I couldn't break 495 in the deadlift until I was 40
Protip: Don't post about it on social media until you get better at it if you're self conscious about not being good at it.
I feel this completely and in fact it's killed my drawing in the last few years... I really wish I could ignore it, but I'm not sure I can.
I just recently got back into Gundam models and now I'm thinking about painting, distressing, building landscapes, etc. I really shouldn't though.
I just recently got back into Gundam models and now I'm thinking about painting, distressing, building landscapes, etc. I really shouldn't though.