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Redditor Asked Straight Guys “What’s The Most Intimate Moment They Had Shared With Another Guy”
- Thread starter SugarNoodles
- Start date
In high school, one of my best friends and I agreeing to hold hands as we walked together because we were scared.
Also, weeping openly with each other as the first member of our group went to college.
But we constantly hug and tell each other we love each other now so it's never really been a thing.
Oh, I was also in a car with another best friend driving through downtown Chicago late at night and he really had to pee, like an emergency. And there was nowhere to pee, and I wound up holding a big gulp cup as he peed into it. That one was a bit psychologically scarring though haha.
Also, weeping openly with each other as the first member of our group went to college.
But we constantly hug and tell each other we love each other now so it's never really been a thing.
Oh, I was also in a car with another best friend driving through downtown Chicago late at night and he really had to pee, like an emergency. And there was nowhere to pee, and I wound up holding a big gulp cup as he peed into it. That one was a bit psychologically scarring though haha.
Obligatory "reddit has a bunch of communities; they're called subreddits"
You can't just call all of reddit garbage. Sometimes I feel like the only person that backs the good communities, jeez. Plethora of info on that site as a tech guy, DIY guy, fixer-upper, etc etc. C'mon now.
I have a friend which was engajed for almost four years, but they broke up one day and he was pretty depressed, because it was almost the vacations. Since he bought a 2w package for vacations on litoral, I asked him to buy her part and we went to Jurere International, here on Brazil. It was there that he found his wife and I date for some time her cousin.
2011, good times...
2011, good times...
My best friend was humoring me when I told him I wanted to go bigfoot hunting. We were out in the woods and we heard rustling, then some kind of growling and roaring. We both woke up and we could see something huge outside. I looked to him and told him " this is it man," He looked to me and said "It's a fucking bear, we're done." I looked back to the tent door and told him "If i die take care of my family, and if you die, i'll do the same." he said yeah and we grabbed our bats we brought (this is before I had guns).
I then told him, "if we going to go down, we're gonna let the mutherfucker know it was in a fight tonight. It'll tell all its bear friends these two humans gave it a good go." he said "yeah, lets leave some damage on that fucker!" and we opened the tent, it was a brown bear rummaging through trash, then it ran off. But scared the shit outta us!
I then told him, "if we going to go down, we're gonna let the mutherfucker know it was in a fight tonight. It'll tell all its bear friends these two humans gave it a good go." he said "yeah, lets leave some damage on that fucker!" and we opened the tent, it was a brown bear rummaging through trash, then it ran off. But scared the shit outta us!
Yeah as described its more or less two dudes in a spa together...
The closest I can think of is staying up with a bud of mine until like 3:00 in the morning talking about life goals and trying to help him through some tough decisions. It was just one of those kinds of talks where ya lay a few things out in the open.
But otherwise I'm not very close with most people, and other than that one friend that one time, we never really got too "fealingsy" with each other. I keep that shit bottled up so it'll give me brain cancer in a few years.
Admittedly, when i dated this one lady, I never really got too emotional with her, either. And I didn't like it when she did. I just kinda ... don't really feel things all that strongly most of the time. And if I do, I keep it to myself. Not trying to sound like a badass since I kinda figure it means I'm broken in some way, but not enough to you know, go see a doctor or something.
But otherwise I'm not very close with most people, and other than that one friend that one time, we never really got too "fealingsy" with each other. I keep that shit bottled up so it'll give me brain cancer in a few years.
Admittedly, when i dated this one lady, I never really got too emotional with her, either. And I didn't like it when she did. I just kinda ... don't really feel things all that strongly most of the time. And if I do, I keep it to myself. Not trying to sound like a badass since I kinda figure it means I'm broken in some way, but not enough to you know, go see a doctor or something.
My best friend's fiancé left him and started fucking all his other male friends. It was the first woman he ever loved and when she did this it broke his heart. She kept playing with his heart by telling him sweet nothings and coming over to use sex to control him. He started drinking real bad and almost lost his job cause he'd keep calling in sick cause of hangovers.
One night he was drinking heavy and the girl came over, had sex with him, then slept in his bed. He texted me in tears not knowing what to do. I drove half an hour to come pick him up and take him over to my fiance's place to talk and sober him up. Over 3 three hours of laughing, crying, and all other emotions at once. I held him in my arms as he cried for how he loved her and how he was so torn. I had him give me all his alcohol at his place when I took him home. I told him to kick her out in the morning, but he wanted to wait to see if she'd stay. Turns out next day she pulled the same bullshit and he kicked her ass to the curb shortly thereafter.
Btw, she lied to all his male friends and they all didn't realize that she was piggy backing off all of them.
One night he was drinking heavy and the girl came over, had sex with him, then slept in his bed. He texted me in tears not knowing what to do. I drove half an hour to come pick him up and take him over to my fiance's place to talk and sober him up. Over 3 three hours of laughing, crying, and all other emotions at once. I held him in my arms as he cried for how he loved her and how he was so torn. I had him give me all his alcohol at his place when I took him home. I told him to kick her out in the morning, but he wanted to wait to see if she'd stay. Turns out next day she pulled the same bullshit and he kicked her ass to the curb shortly thereafter.
Btw, she lied to all his male friends and they all didn't realize that she was piggy backing off all of them.
When I was 12-13 my friend and I would watch porn and jerk off together.
Other than that probably just hugging my friends after not seeing them for a long time.
Other than that probably just hugging my friends after not seeing them for a long time.
Sureeeeee! Get his number afterwards? :)
I kiss my best friend whom i rarely see ALL the time. On the cheek, but still. It's a sloppy kiss, lol
I'm noticing a lot of the stories being shared start with being "super drunk". Can't say I'm even remotely surprised that the only time many straight men can tolerate being intimate around another man is when they're a sloppy mess.
Also, those of you accounting moments of bullying and assault as intimacy or trolling with obviously fake gay sex anecdotes? How does it feel to have your masculinity be so paper-thin fragile that you shit up a thread you clearly want no part in just so you can try and shut it down and not exist? I'm seriously asking. I imagine it as being in a state of constant fear, but figured I should get a clarification.
Also, those of you accounting moments of bullying and assault as intimacy or trolling with obviously fake gay sex anecdotes? How does it feel to have your masculinity be so paper-thin fragile that you shit up a thread you clearly want no part in just so you can try and shut it down and not exist? I'm seriously asking. I imagine it as being in a state of constant fear, but figured I should get a clarification.
I get you, you're not alone here.
Nobody's saying heterosexuality isn't a valid concept. It's more that pop culture has dictated for ages that sexuality (and romance!) is generally binary and far less commonly non-binary. When it makes more sense that even heterosexuality and homosexuality exist on a spectrum and are truly relative to something, are multifaceted and possible to change (but not in a correctional prayer group way). Is your sexuality defined by who you think you are or what you've done? Or what you haven't done?
And just as heterosexual people might understand bi/pansexuality but not directly relate to the same feelings, bi/pansexuals might respect but not exactly directly understand the experience and values of a binary or even gendered sexuality.
I'm a male who considers himself "straight", but have come to realize my attraction lies more in features and personality and isn't tied exclusively to gender/sex. So I know in the rare chance someone who exclusively identifies as "man" but ticks my boxes, and there's mutual interest, I'd be stupid for not taking the chance.
On topic I guess I've shared nudie pics with (non-straight)men I'm not interested in but appreciated that they like them and how I look lol. Tho ymmv if that's considered "intimate"...
This is a really excellent thread to read, and reassuring at that too. I think there's a lot of norms that we build up when to comes to non-romantic male relationships, and I fear it stops a lot of meaningful connections from being made.
I'm bi, so I guess I don't fit the exact direction of this question, but most of my meaningful interpersonal relationships have been with men whom I share absolutely no romantic feelings. I think it's really important to know that you can have really potent non-romantic feelings towards someone and it doesn't need to imply any romantic connection. Going on road trips talking with friends about where our lives are going, having friends text you out of the blue to ask how things are, or how a date you mentioned in passing a week ago went, walking around your hometown with your bud just talking your way through some intense mutual pain; that stuff is important, and I fully believe it'll make your life more fulfilling to have those moments with someone, and not just wait until there's a significant other in the picture, or if there is then to avoid leaning on your SO for 100% of all interpersonal closeness.
If there's one thing I'd like to add to the conversation too, it's that I've seen more than a few of these stories share one particular anecdote of closeness followed by "then we never mentioned it again and went back to normal". In the end, only we can judge what we want our relationships to be, so make that choice for yourself, but I'd implore anyone in those cases to consider whether, if that moment felt useful or comforting to you, you should actually strive to not go back to "normal", but instead open up communication with them a bit more at times, and try to be open and close with them, and have more moments like that.
I'm bi, so I guess I don't fit the exact direction of this question, but most of my meaningful interpersonal relationships have been with men whom I share absolutely no romantic feelings. I think it's really important to know that you can have really potent non-romantic feelings towards someone and it doesn't need to imply any romantic connection. Going on road trips talking with friends about where our lives are going, having friends text you out of the blue to ask how things are, or how a date you mentioned in passing a week ago went, walking around your hometown with your bud just talking your way through some intense mutual pain; that stuff is important, and I fully believe it'll make your life more fulfilling to have those moments with someone, and not just wait until there's a significant other in the picture, or if there is then to avoid leaning on your SO for 100% of all interpersonal closeness.
If there's one thing I'd like to add to the conversation too, it's that I've seen more than a few of these stories share one particular anecdote of closeness followed by "then we never mentioned it again and went back to normal". In the end, only we can judge what we want our relationships to be, so make that choice for yourself, but I'd implore anyone in those cases to consider whether, if that moment felt useful or comforting to you, you should actually strive to not go back to "normal", but instead open up communication with them a bit more at times, and try to be open and close with them, and have more moments like that.
So many things:
holding hands, being close, spending hours awake at night laying all emotions bare. Everything. A lot of the weird things you can think of too. I am so happy I have had such intimiate non-intimate (if you know what I mean) contact with men.
Ideas of masculinity getting in the way of men being actually sympathetic and empathetic and able to be physical is fucking horrible, and I hate it. The pressure to be a certain style of man (the only type apparently) was one of the worst things when growing up, and shedding that at my coming of age and over time was wondrous.
holding hands, being close, spending hours awake at night laying all emotions bare. Everything. A lot of the weird things you can think of too. I am so happy I have had such intimiate non-intimate (if you know what I mean) contact with men.
Ideas of masculinity getting in the way of men being actually sympathetic and empathetic and able to be physical is fucking horrible, and I hate it. The pressure to be a certain style of man (the only type apparently) was one of the worst things when growing up, and shedding that at my coming of age and over time was wondrous.
My best friend has tucked me and my drunk ass in a couple of times. We've also said we love each other a few times. That's as intimate as it got.
Playing guitar and singing songs around a bonfire with my best friend. I've got a lot of intimate moments with my guy friends though, just how my personality is. We always says we love eachother after long phone calls, hugs goodbye etc.
me and a couple of friends in middle school discovered our sexuality together by looking at pics of the lady wrestlers on the wwe website.
One of my friends is gay and accused me of being homophobic, so I kissed him on the mouth. That's about it as far as physically.
I mean I give my friends hugs and be there for them when they're in their feelings about something, but I feel like that's regular behavior for good friends.
I mean I give my friends hugs and be there for them when they're in their feelings about something, but I feel like that's regular behavior for good friends.
Yeah I sleep with chicks all the time. Even one bi chick. Spooning and shit. Totes not a lesbian.
Meanwhile my brother wasn't comfortable rooming with a dude after he came out to my brother, after having roomed together for months. I told him the above and he and my dad gawked and said various versions of "YEAH WELL IT'S DIFFERENT FOR GUYS."
Further on topic, the stories in OP are adorable actually.
Lots of moments for me. I went to a boarding school, and although it was coed the dormitories were gender specific and there were many, many antics that could be considered intimate in one way or another. Also lots of just-friends-spooning.
My current best friend that I met in college and I have had too many intimate moments to count. We've spooned, hug every time we see each other, have kissed on the cheek a ton and chastely on the lips a few times. We routinely spoon on nights of heavy drug use. I got ordained online just to officiate his wedding, which was emotionally intimate if not so much physically. Similarly we're always sharing new facts and discoveries with each other and try and plough through philosophy and life's meaning and mysteries together. We have a standing pact stemming from our days of mutual depression in college that if either of us ever decided to kill ourselves we absolutely must call the other and not follow through until we've had the opportunity to try and talk the other out of it at most or say goodbye at least. My college gf used to say we have "the kind of bromance that they make movies about." I'm an only child and he's the closest thing I'll ever have to a brother.
I think I'll drop by his work and surprise him tomorrow. Maybe I'll bring him flowers in honor of this thread lol.
My current best friend that I met in college and I have had too many intimate moments to count. We've spooned, hug every time we see each other, have kissed on the cheek a ton and chastely on the lips a few times. We routinely spoon on nights of heavy drug use. I got ordained online just to officiate his wedding, which was emotionally intimate if not so much physically. Similarly we're always sharing new facts and discoveries with each other and try and plough through philosophy and life's meaning and mysteries together. We have a standing pact stemming from our days of mutual depression in college that if either of us ever decided to kill ourselves we absolutely must call the other and not follow through until we've had the opportunity to try and talk the other out of it at most or say goodbye at least. My college gf used to say we have "the kind of bromance that they make movies about." I'm an only child and he's the closest thing I'll ever have to a brother.
I think I'll drop by his work and surprise him tomorrow. Maybe I'll bring him flowers in honor of this thread lol.
i've kissed my best friend for fun. just two straight dudes touching lips nbd
i've had two close friends get super drunk and throw up everywhere. they then decide to turn on the tub and shower, hop in naked, and just sit there. it smelled awful :(
i've had two close friends get super drunk and throw up everywhere. they then decide to turn on the tub and shower, hop in naked, and just sit there. it smelled awful :(
We hit the gym with a friend of mine, afterwards we went to his place (it was actually his girlfriends place), prepared food, ate like crazy and afterwards I went to their bed to take a nap. Not long after he snuck there next to me to take a nap as well. So we took a nap under one blanket for an hour or so and laughed about it afterwards.
I'm gay and I totally understand being attracted to one sexual presentation.
I didnt have any i didnt wanna go to the storw. He had more than he would ever need that night.
A friend, who has since died in a car crash, told me he loved me when he was drunk and I let him stay in my spare room after a rough break up. I replied, "love you too gaybo" and we hugged.
Your unintended implication is that you gave him the condom back after you used it lol.
Well in a way...i mean its too long a story but does it count if at the end of it all they were disposed off in his room?
I guess when my dad hugs me. I hate hugs. I only let him do it because it's my dad. So he kinda have a right to it.
Physical interactions other than a handshake are reserved ONLY to romantic partners. I'm extremely sensible to tickles and about everything cause them to me (really, even a ribbon lightly glancing on the sleeve of my shirt give me the creeps). So i avoid them as much as i can.
Physical interactions other than a handshake are reserved ONLY to romantic partners. I'm extremely sensible to tickles and about everything cause them to me (really, even a ribbon lightly glancing on the sleeve of my shirt give me the creeps). So i avoid them as much as i can.
