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How much sex do you have a week or month?
- Thread starter JK-Money
- Start date
Heterosexual courtship is at least 50 years behind gay culture.
Remember that Seinfeld episode where Jerry says to Elaine: "I remember it was a good thing..." ?
That's me right now.
That's me right now.
No it's not a joke, wtf?
My GF is dealing with strong mental issues that are also affecting her physically with for example weight gain and many complications surrounding her period. She has insomnia like crazy and depression is zapping almost all of her motivation from her with extreme social anxiety making any time leaving her apartment a pure act of will. She can't work a job at the moment and is focusing solely on working on improving her situation. As I said earlier when I say "supporting my GF" I mean with actual support not money. We live in Germany so I don't need to do that
It's just that 3 years with zero sex while in a committed relationship sounds insane to me. I wish you the best.
I just got married a week ago so it's kind of been almost every night or morning. We cuddle and then she gets really turned on lol.
Sex isn't really something I put a massive emphasis on. We got a very strong bond of love
2-3x per week now that I have the kids trained to do 7-7 at night. It's tough to have the energy or inclination sometimes with a 2 yr old and a baby, but it's always worth the effort just for the mental boost. I totally feel other parents with the blah, though.
Not quite every other day, but we only just got out of the 6 month sleep deprivation hell from #2. Am I crazy for considering a third?
Once you get their sleeping in order it's not too bad.
It's true that you're so fried sometimes that you kind of just want to puddle on the couch, but like I said above, it's not forever and I haven't found it to be lame. Hell, it's more fun in some ways because you have to get creative a lot of the time time/location-wise.
Not quite every other day, but we only just got out of the 6 month sleep deprivation hell from #2. Am I crazy for considering a third?
Once you get their sleeping in order it's not too bad.
It's true that you're so fried sometimes that you kind of just want to puddle on the couch, but like I said above, it's not forever and I haven't found it to be lame. Hell, it's more fun in some ways because you have to get creative a lot of the time time/location-wise.
Some of the responses made me LOL.. With a baby and a 4 year old in an apartment, I've come to appreciate more the quiet, private moments my wife and I had before. 1-2 times a month would be where we're at if all the stars align.
That said -
Montresor Hang in there buddy. Sex in of itself isn't a yardstick to measure your life by or a checkbox on a task list. Sure its great when it is with someone you care about/cares for you - but not having it should not take away from who you are and your accomplishments. Great work on your fitness drive! I wish i had your resolve :)
I don't know you or your context - but I don't believe sex in any way, shape or form should be something you need to identify with. I do hope I've not antagonized you in any way with this - but as with any member from this community, I'd wish for you to be the best version of yourself. Be well!
That said -
Montresor Hang in there buddy. Sex in of itself isn't a yardstick to measure your life by or a checkbox on a task list. Sure its great when it is with someone you care about/cares for you - but not having it should not take away from who you are and your accomplishments. Great work on your fitness drive! I wish i had your resolve :)
I don't know you or your context - but I don't believe sex in any way, shape or form should be something you need to identify with. I do hope I've not antagonized you in any way with this - but as with any member from this community, I'd wish for you to be the best version of yourself. Be well!
I'm not a biologist but I would guess after having a kid the main drive for sex lessens because the primary goal for having sex is fulfilled?
I can't speak for guys, but giving birth can result in traumatic physical injuries/changes and sex can be very painful for months if not years afterward. Those changes can also be very embarrassing for some women (think 3rd degree tears, C-sections, breasts after weaning, etc.) which can hit right in the confidence and make them reluctant to get naked much less intimate. Then there are the hormones which can tank any desire or lead to debilitating depression. Sleep deprivation hits you physically and mentally... The list goes on and on.
A handful of times a year. Admittedly, both of us work a ton, we're both older than most of you (45 and 50), and neither of us place much importance on it. When our spare time would be rather spent sleeping in late, playing games, or going to dinner and/or a movie, sex is not very high on the list of things we look to for recreation.
It's honestly no big deal.
It's honestly no big deal.
That makes a lot of sense. I had no idea it could be painful to have sex after birth.
honestly, maybe once a month.
We used to be touchy and mild active. Now we're just like "Meh". Kinda makes me wonder if we'll just not have kids.
We used to be touchy and mild active. Now we're just like "Meh". Kinda makes me wonder if we'll just not have kids.
Search "perineal tear" and tell me what you think*. That's one of the most common injuries post-childbirth and far, far less bad than some of the others.
*Don't go to images. I'm not that cruel. Just look at the medical drawing on the general search page.
Oh we both would like to have more sex but somehow we're too busy or tired or whatever. When we do, it's great. And when we don't, i still think i'm the luckiest guy alive, so no worries. We probably should put a bit more effort into it though. We've been together for 23 years now.
Full on sex? Maybe a few times a year. Blowjobs? About once every few months if that.
Honestly I've never been big on sex, my mind operates oddly when it comes and I find sex to be a hassle and I'm lazy. I'm more than happy to just get a blowjob and that be it.
Honestly I've never been big on sex, my mind operates oddly when it comes and I find sex to be a hassle and I'm lazy. I'm more than happy to just get a blowjob and that be it.
Yeah, basically this, we both like oral better than sex, so it's usally she first then me.. Full on sex takes ages and is exhausting. When we were trying to get pregnant we did have sex 6 days in a row during the fertile days each month. After 3 days neither of us was anywhere close to being in the mood anymore, it was basically work after that.
Some people on here apparently have insane libidos and energy
usually it's oral 2-3 time a month and actual sex about once every month for us and we couldn't be happier with that ;)
Thanks y'all, hehe! It's been a lot of fun, most important thing has been communication throughout :)
Does that work for you both?
I have only had casual sex once, and it felt very cold and transactional, unlike sex in a relationship.
Married, no kids.
Couple times a week. She'd prefer daily but my drive isn't as high as hers. I always think about that bit from Chris Rock's netflix special about how important sex is. Doesn't matter if you're tired, busy, etc, make time for it.
Couple times a week. She'd prefer daily but my drive isn't as high as hers. I always think about that bit from Chris Rock's netflix special about how important sex is. Doesn't matter if you're tired, busy, etc, make time for it.
Nah its fine. We know each other pretty good by now. It started as a "drunken accident" after a mutual friends birthday party 7 month ago but we exchanged phone numbers and it developed to a little more than just a one night stand.
We both are in no need for a relationship right now so this suits both of us...
You're a good guy man. Severe social anxiety is no joke and I know where she's coming from (had many periods of times where I've been housebound for months at a time aswell). She needs someone like you in her life that supports her and appreciates you for it even if she finds it hard to show it at times.
Obviously the situation ain't ideal for you but the fact you're still with her & supporting her through her hard times says a lot about you man. Hope she can get her mental health under control