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Sex isn‘t all that important. Do you agree?

Thickstone

Thickstone

Member
Oct 27, 2017
213
IMO of course

Given that our society/media make such a fuss about the whole topic and many relationship problems revolve around the quantity of sexual activity, I always felt that sex isn't all that great or important.

I'm even in an open relationship and do not use the opportunity that often. Being a male gay, getting prepped for the act is often quite the hassle and in addition, it never feels as good as I'm anticipating. This is basically my main gripe: I have the wildest fantasies but the actual act in reality is often just ''quite good'' and this is not because the other one is bad but rather since sex is often awkward (even with familliar partners) and the feeling - while nice - is not that life-changing experience many make it out to be. If the act is taking too long, I will even get bored and hope for it to be done soon. In fact I'm totally okay with having sex every two months since I feel that a mere masturbation suffices and is more hassle free.

Whenever I'm having sex with my SO, I feel that cuddling would be so much better.

Is sex an important aspect in your life or do you have similar feelings?
 

Mister Saturn

Banned
Oct 31, 2017
308
Well, it does help with that whole "continuation and propagation of the species," thing, so that would be my first point of disagreement.
 
Laserdisk

Laserdisk

Banned
May 11, 2018
8,942
UK
In a relationship, can take or leave it does not think it's important...
Try not having the option?
 
Biestmann

Biestmann

Member
Oct 25, 2017
7,413
Sex is nice, but I think society has produced an unhealthy obsession with it, resulting in a plethora of problems.
 
ShyMel

ShyMel

Moderator
Oct 31, 2017
3,483
Sexual compatibility is an important part of romantic relationships for the vast majority of people. Many relationships end if both people do not have the same frequency desire for sex.
 
TheGhost

TheGhost

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
28,137
Long Island
I think it's very important if you actually love the person you're with, plus it's a great stress reliever. But there is less prep time when I do that so not the same.
 
Principate

Principate

Member
Oct 31, 2017
11,186
It's alright, nice thing to have/do but the people that tend to be most obsessed about it tend to have it rarely or not at all, so put it on a pedestal.
 
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VaanXSnake

VaanXSnake

Banned
Jul 18, 2018
2,099
I'm sorry but people that don't think sex is awesome or amazing just have bad partners or have accumulated too much bad sex.
 
THEVOID

THEVOID

Prophet of Regret
Member
Oct 27, 2017
22,865
It's everything to me. I have to have passion and that includes sex.
 
julia crawford

julia crawford

Took the red AND the blue pills
Member
Oct 27, 2017
35,285
Like, in life? There are things I'd rather be doing like travelling and stuff. In a relationship it's uhhh... hard to generalise, I'd rather have no sex than have bad sex, but good sex is ok but I'd maybe still rather be travelling and seeing new things instead
 
TyrantGuardian

TyrantGuardian

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,293
It depends. Optimal sex (obviously 100% subjective, as it should be) is up there. If you're one of those people for whom optimal sex is incredibly rare and you're not willing to put in the effort and potential shaming in searching for others who are compatible with that and being open about it, sex is obviously going to be less rewarding and thus less important for you than for those who click perfectly with more stereotypical forms of sex.

I, personally, could not care less about generic sex in the long run. The initial thrill of getting to know someone new is fine regardless but after that my interest dies of real quick if I'm not specifically compatible with that person. Thus, most sex isn't that important to me but with the right partner it can easily shift in terms of priorities. Making an absolute statement one way or the other either means that you've already got what you want or you just haven't gotten to know your own sexuality well enough yet. Which is perfectly fine, by the way. Also none of this applies to people who identify as being Asexual.
 
BeforeU

BeforeU

Banned for use of alt account
Banned
Oct 30, 2017
1,936
Eat, Breath, Shit and Fuck.

Are primal need. There is nothing more important than these 4 things. So idk wtf you talking about dude.
 
ParanoidRED

ParanoidRED

Banned
Nov 2, 2017
2,931
Sex can't be awkward, especially if you are with someone you like or have feelings for

Loosing the awkwardness and being able to go all out is what made me realise that i was actually in love with my bf and he was the right person for me

And the sex is amazing, just like our first time, i also find it quite relaxing after a day of work
 

Snack12367

Member
Oct 28, 2017
3,191
Depends, but as a society we tend to put way more importance on it than it should, but that's only because sex sells. Sex is very primal and appeals to just about everyone. Male or Female, sometime all you want to do is have sex.

In a relationship I think it's important. Being intimate with you so is an important part of determining chemistry.
 
bshock

bshock

Self-requested permanent ban
Banned
Nov 3, 2017
1,394
It's awesome when you're with a woman you care for. It's whatever when you aren't.
 
Germangerbil

Germangerbil

Member
Oct 27, 2017
103
Germany
I´m pretty sure I could go years without sex and not feel any worse. Sure it is an awesome feeling but it is so ephemeral that it has no lasting impact on my wellbeing. Watching a really good movie with my wife has a more lasting and profound impact on my wellbeing and our relationship than having sex one more time.
 
Servbot24

Servbot24

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
43,138
Sex is great but it's not a driving factor in my life. I haven't had sex in close to two years and I honestly don't feel that bad about it.

The main problem is that I don't enjoy sex unless I love my partner, and getting to that stage is a big time and emotional investment I can't really spare.
 
sersteven

sersteven

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,206
Philadelphia
From an evolved standpoint, no, its not that important.

From a biological standpoint, its the only reason we exist and even things we inherently don't think about have to do with a deep coded instinct to eventuall procreate like most other creatures on the planet.

So I'd say its meh.
 
RM8

RM8

Member
Oct 28, 2017
7,903
JP
Servbot24 said:
Sex is great but it's not a driving factor in my life.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...
This is exactly how I'd put it. It's great and I prefer having it over not having it, but it's not really detrimental to my quality of life when I'm not having it. And even though it's quite important in a romantic relationship, it's not even what I like the most about being in one.
 
Vommy

Vommy

Chicken Chaser
Member
Oct 27, 2017
4,928
I think that sex is important in a relationship but it is not essential.
 
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