Why aren't people more considerate when you have less items than them at the checkout line?

In the grand scheme of things it all balances out. The person at the store with 100 items is going to the store much less frequently than the person who gets three things. I say this as someone that often stops at the store to get 1-5 items. The ones getting a ton of stuff at once are shopping much more efficiently and using less cashier time per item as the real delays come from payment, not the scanning/bagging of items. Self-checkout or express lines are there for those of us who get just a few things. Barring that I never feel like someone should be obligated to let me ahead of them because I only have a few things. The only thing I ask of those ahead of me is to be fast when paying, be aware that small talk with the cashier is just to pass the time and should not lead to them sticking around once the transaction is done, etc...
I'm personally much more frustrated with the number of people that are too slow/dumb to properly use a self-checkout machine, can't figure out how to insert their credit card, etc...

Microsoft said:

You know, you have 3 or less items and they have 150+ yet they do not let you go in front of them. Three items will take 2 minutes at most vs a lot more than 2 minutes with 150+ items. People should let those with very few items go ahead and pass...

Edit: All self checkout machines were closed at the time. It was almost closing hour. For more context. So lines were packed.

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Haven't read the whole thread so apologies if this has been asked, but why do you feel your time is more important than others'?

May just be a British thing but people regularly let me go ahead if them if I'm just grabbing a drink or something.

Conversely they might be thinking, why you make a trip to the store for 3 items chump, wasting everyone's time.

If there is a mom with small kids in a hurry absolutely. Otherwise wait you turn.

ObbyDent said:

Regretfully I work as a cashier at a major grocery store. My heart goes out to you if you were waiting behind that person near closing time and the self-checkout was closed. Which, it shouldn't be, btw.

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I work at a Target.

We close self-checkout about an hour before closing because they need someone to watch while they do it for safety reasons (This area's kinda sketchy) and lotsa people leave after that.

That said, you can just go to guest service if you only have a few items so... *shrugs*

No Onions said:

If they have 150 items they probably have kids and shit and grocery shopping for a family is a huge chore. They just want to buy their stuff and go home, you think they have time to worry about you and your 3 items? Grow up, the world doesn't revolve around you.

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Wow. What a shitty mentality, and part of the reason the world is so shit is that so many people think like you, unable to look beyond themselves. If I had 150 items and noticed the person behind me had 3, I would 100% ask them to go ahead of me. I believe in slightly inconveniencing myself in order to take a massive inconvenience off someone else. I'm sorry for you, if you think anyone who shares this mentality needs to "grow up". Yes, I always "worry" about those around me and try to make the lives of those around me slightly easier especially if it costs me nothing.

Paradoxal Utopia said:

Wow. What a shitty mentality, and part of the reason the world is so shit is that so many people think like you, unable to look beyond themselves. If I had 150 items and noticed the person behind me had 3, I would 100% ask them to go ahead of me. I believe in slightly inconveniencing myself in order to take a massive inconvenience off someone else. I'm sorry for you, if you think anyone who shares this mentality needs to "grow up". Yes, I always "worry" about those around me and try to make the lives of those around me slightly easier especially if it costs me nothing.

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That's great. Congratulations.

Somebody not doing the same does not make them a shitty person though.

Doom said:

That's great. Congratulations.

Somebody not doing the same does not make them a shitty person though.

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Exactly. It's a nice gesture, but should not be expected. I haven't seen a supermarket in the US without either express lines or self-checkout in decades, so this would have been a bigger issue 30-40 years ago.

i'll ask if someone just has a few items and have been asked. but i don't get mad if someone doesn't. what if there are multiple ppl in line with only a handful of items, do you let them all go? lol

Paradoxal Utopia said:

Wow. What a shitty mentality, and part of the reason the world is so shit is that so many people think like you, unable to look beyond themselves. If I had 150 items and noticed the person behind me had 3, I would 100% ask them to go ahead of me. I believe in slightly inconveniencing myself in order to take a massive inconvenience off someone else. I'm sorry for you, if you think anyone who shares this mentality needs to "grow up". Yes, I always "worry" about those around me and try to make the lives of those around me slightly easier especially if it costs me nothing.

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Again, we know nothing of the person with 150 items. There time is equally a valid as the person with fewer items. People are not shitty for valuing their time. It is shitty to assume people are selfish for waiting in cue.

Letting someone ahead of you is situational. If I'm not in a hurry, and I notice someone would be quicker, I may consider letting someone ahead of me. I have a narrow window of time to complete my shopping chores, I'm not letting anyone in front me. My time is just as valuable as everyone else. I look at the lines when I enter to store to gauge the wait. If it is going to be too long- I'll come back another time or figure out what else I can cut from my day.

If they ask, I'll weigh my options. More often it is yes, but some time it is no- I don't have time to give.

Objektivity said:

Haven't read the whole thread so apologies if this has been asked, but why do you feel your time is more important than others'?

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This.

It's nice when people recognize that you have fewer items, and if they have the time, let you through first. But here's the deal; Their time is just as valuable as yours. OP, you're not entitled to go first just because you're shopping lighter. No one is obligated to let you through first.

Huh.

I have never once thought someone should let me go in front of them because they have more items than me. I just wait my turn.

Do you guys think the OPs of thread backfires learn and grow, or do they think everyone else is wrong?

Night Angel said:

Do you guys think the OPs of thread backfires learn and grow, or do they think everyone else is wrong?

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Depending on what kind of person OP is. I think studies have shown authoritarian loving conservative types double down on their 'wrongness'.

Op sounds entitled.

I regularly see people with 40+ items at the express lanes. People suck

Calling someone else entitled because you think your time is more valuable than their time is... wow.

The bigger problem is when you've been waiting in line for 10 minutes and a new line opens and the person in the back of the line runs to go first. Fucking hate those people.

Dusktildawn48 said:

The bigger problem is when you've been waiting in line for 10 minutes and a new line opens and the person in the back of the line runs to go first. Fucking hate those people.

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I've worked retail. What the cashier supervisor is supposed to do is get the next person in line bring them over to the closed register then open the register. Voila!

Objektivity said:

I've worked retail. What the cashier supervisor is supposed to do is get the next person in line bring them over to the closed register then open the register. Voila!

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If only they actually did that. See this shit at Walmart and gas stations constantly

never once thought to do this. in the aisles, the only thoughts on my mind are survival and escape.


i also never once thought to expect this, i am not entitled, i am on the consumer battlegrounds and no one owes me any mercy.

I once allowed a guy behind me who had a handful of items to go ahead, he thanked me, then his wife comes around the corner with a stacked trolley after forgetting a bag of sugar and the only thing I've done is extend my wait from 3 seconds to 5 minutes.

People are monsters, never again.

Actually at least in the Seattle area. (east side , Redmond,Kirkland), I've been shocked how often people do tell me to go ahead. They usually ask if that's all I have and then say well you go ahead. Shocks me every time but happens at least 50% of the time I'm in that situation.

I do look like a kid so maybe they call themselves being nice to a kid and remembering how hard patience was for them back then. It usually is people who appear older than me who often make the offer.

Night Angel said:

Do you guys think the OPs of thread backfires learn and grow, or do they think everyone else is wrong?

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I don't think so. OP has commented a few time but never (at least as far as I've seen) to one of the many critics.

I mean, usually when someone starts a thread they really just want validation on what they were doing, not debate.

The opposite happened to me this morning. Lady with a cart full who is already filling up the conveyer belt sees me and says go ahead. I only had 3 items so I was quick and thanked her. It's like 50/50 where they'll volunteer but the rest of the time I just ask and only had one old fart who told me no but overall people just don't notice or aren't paying attention

How do you know how many people with less items they've already let pass them before you arrived though? Maybe 3, maybe 5? Where do you draw the line?

Even if they were in line when you arrived and everyone behind them has less items how many people should they let pass?

Dude they probably just spent like 2 hours shopping for all those items. God forbid they just want to get the hell out there.

Dusktildawn48 said:

If only they actually did that. See this shit at Walmart and gas stations constantly

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Aldi does it the correct way. Existing cashier goes around grabs the person who is next and takes them to the soon to be opened line. Pretty quick and thoughtful

I do it for others and am pleasantly surprised if they do it for me, but I have no expectation.

self checkout makes this not a thing, so I dislike stores that don't have them.

Microsoft said:

I feel like no matter what I'd say I'd be in the wrong. I mean, I meant no harm asking this question. I was just wondering. I only go out shopping when I need something quick. In my particular case, it was 2 bottles of shampoo and a toothbrush. I couldn't wait a day or two from online shipping. I don't feel I'm entitled because though, in my mind I was hoping they would let me pass them, I waited my for turn as expected. It's not the thought that counts, it's the intent or how you act on them that counts.

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What you opened the thread with was more than hoping.....

I was in line once with maybe 10 items in a bit of a hurry and this woman gets in line behind me with one item and she says "Excuse me.." I reply "No, sorry your time isn't more valuable than mine" and tried to smile but all I could manage was a smirk.

Microsoft said:

I feel like no matter what I'd say I'd be in the wrong. I mean, I meant no harm asking this question. I was just wondering. I only go out shopping when I need something quick. In my particular case, it was 2 bottles of shampoo and a toothbrush. I couldn't wait a day or two from online shipping. I don't feel I'm entitled because though, in my mind I was hoping they would let me pass them, I waited my for turn as expected. It's not the thought that counts, it's the intent or how you act on them that counts.

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What do you mean intent? We're you forcibly going to skip the person?

I will usually let the person with a few things by me if I'm shopping by myself. If I'm with my kids, not happening. I bring my one year old to the store, I'm racing against the clock until meltdown.

lol

Like what, the guy with the F150 is going to let the Civic cut in front of them for the gas line? Think about that for a sec

Sometimes people will let me in front when I only have a few things, but I don't expect it and it's always a kind thing for them to do

Not really something peeps should request, just wait like 3-4 minutes max

Magus Z said:

Sorry OP, full of good arguments here. If you are not a priority (pregnant, with a baby or old) wait until it's your time.

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I don't care if you're pregnant, old, bleeding out or have a baby. Go to self checkout or 10-15 or less checkout. I'm headphones in not paying attention to anything from the second i step foot in a grocery store to the second i get out. You're time isn't more valuable than mine.

It's a nice gesture if offered but I would never ask someone if I could cut them in line just because I have fewer items than them. That seems pretty rude tbh.

Edward said:

I don't care if you're pregnant, old, bleeding out or have a baby. Go to self checkout or 10-15 or less checkout. I'm headphones in not paying attention to anything from the second i step foot in a grocery store to the second i get out. You're time isn't more valuable than mine.

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Actually someone who's bleeding out's time is more valuable than yours because they could die. In no way shape or form do they compare to entitled people who just think they should get to skip ahead because they have one item.

I always check to see if the person behind me only has a few items and will say that they can go ahead of me.

I've seen way too many people in Publix/etc. before where they bring like 30+ items to the "10 items or less" fast checkout lane, never understood the mentality of people who did that.

I will do it for others, but I won't hold it against someone if they don't do the same for me. But I will silently rage against those that bring a loaded cart to the express checkout. Fuck people like that.

Microsoft said:

Probably not the right word to use but, say if I had demanded to pass the people in front of me or something like that. Which ovbiously I'm not going to do. Otherwise I'd be entitled an an asshole.

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Expecting other people to let you cut in line since you have have fewer items - whether you asked them to or not - and thinking them inconsiderate if they don't, is very self-entitled.
Everyone has a finite amount of time, and you don't know how long they might have been waiting if it's busy, so you should expect to wait in line like anyone else even if you have a single item.
It's nice if the line is empty and someone with a large order offers to let you in front of them, or if you do that when the situation is reversed, but you should never expect it, and I'd think you were an asshole if you cut in line when there are other people waiting behind you.

You think i ever pay attention to the people behind me?

Self checkout for the win.

So I've had people offer let me go first all the time, but I've never asked for that I'm usually just standing in line minding my own business. I usually ask, "Are you sure? You don't have to and I'm no rush".

Then I've been in line with like 10 things and I've had someone come up behind me in line and say, "Hey I only have 1 item can I go in front of you?". Fucking no you rude ass motherfucker, is what I think but I'll say, "Nah sorry I was here first." These are the type of people who then rant in public, and once I was called a "racist" because of it ... like wtf? I've also countless times offered to let people go in front of me when I see they have less but if you flat out ASK me to cut in line.. fuck off.