When did you think you finally "made it"?

[FaceHugger]

I'm unmarried. No kids. No debt. Six figure salary. Plenty in savings and retirement. Kind of a high maintenance girlfriend but she's not wild about spending my money. She might go off and spend $500 on a purse or coat or something but nothing too crazy.

When I turned 29 I paid off all of my student loans and other debt and landed this job that pays me so much I don't even bother to budget or anything. So I thought "this is it, I finally made it. Time to go on cruise control". But then I saw how some of my bosses lived, particularly this women I used to work under (she gave me my first big break into tech) who pivoted from a job at Adobe to one at Microsoft. Her home is basically an estate, it looks like Wayne Manor from the movies. She casually showed me her Fidelity retirement account summary one day and it is literally more than I could ever earn working at my current job. Millions of dollars.

So I got to thinking. Maybe I really haven't made it yet. But I mean, how could I? Get lucky? Save the CEO's life or something and have him promote me to VP? Am I overthinking things and should just be happy? Hell should I get married? Have kids?

I just don't know. It seems like nothing is ever enough. Also sorry if I sound like a well-off jag off, I came from extreme poverty. I worked numerous kitchen jobs through college, lived in my car some weeks. $40k a year to child me would have sounded like luxurious riches. So this, actually having money, is uncharted territory for me.

 

[rpm]

I absolutely have not "made it"

I mean, IMO, if you think you've "made it", then you "made it". If you're happy with your current circumstances, that's all that matters, try not to feel the need to keep up with the Joneses

 

[Fulminator]

i don't think i ever will. not necessarily because i don't think i can but because what the hell is "it" anyways? I don't make much money at all (like really not a lot lol) but i'm ok with that. I think chasing after "it" is kinda a fools errand. Just do what you want to do in life and try to make the best choices you can. I don't really think too hard about it beyond that.

in your situation though OP, what does it matter? You say you already make enough to not have to budget for things. WOuld making that much more money even make a difference to your lifestyle? Who cares. After a certain point it all kind of becomes the same imo.

i'm not really a money oriented person though so maybe i can't relate

 

[Lightus]

Looking at what others have is a waste of time. Work to be happy and leave it at that.

 

[aerts1js]

Your post is going to rub some people the wrong way but good for you. I paid off all my debt a few years ago, everything. I am saving at a (fairly?) rapid rate but I don't feel like i'll have "made it" until I have a mil or two in the bank. That will be quite some time from now.

 

[deimosmasque]

Looking at what others have is a waste of time. Work to be happy and leave it at that.

Click to shrink...

Yup

 

[Stinkles]

I'll tell you tomorrow after the powerball drawing.

 

[Soriku]

What job do you have

Also lol at the Scarface avatar

 

[Ryuelli]

I'm unmarried. No kids. No debt. Six figure salary. Plenty in savings and retirement. Kind of a high maintenance girlfriend but she's not wild about spending my money. She might go off and spend $500 on a purse or coat or something but nothing too crazy.

When I turned 29 I paid off all of my student loans and other debt and landed this job that pays me so much I don't even bother to budget or anything. So I thought "this is it, I finally made it. Time to go on cruise control". But then I saw how some of my bosses lived, particularly this women I used to work under (she gave me my first big break into tech) who pivoted from a job at Adobe to one at Microsoft. Her home is basically an estate, it looks like Wayne Manor from the movies. She casually showed me her Fidelity retirement account summary one day and it is literally more than I could ever earn working at my current job. Millions of dollars.

So I got to thinking. Maybe I really haven't made it yet. But I mean, how could I? Get lucky? Save the CEO's life or something and have him promote me to VP? Am I overthinking things and should just be happy? Hell should I get married? Have kids?

I just don't know. It seems like nothing is ever enough. Also sorry if I sound like a well-off jag off, I came from extreme poverty. I worked numerous kitchen jobs through college, lived in my car some weeks. $40k a year to child me would have sounded like luxurious riches. So this, actually having money, is uncharted territory for me.

Click to shrink...

As a teacher I certainly hope the qualifications for "making it" is more than just money.

 

[Sobriquet]

When I was making decent money at the job I wanted to do

 

[Ryuelli]

What job do you have

Click to shrink...

I'm assuming one of those part time under water basket weavers that buy large houses on HGTV.

 

[Silly Buck]

You've "made it" when you finally realize no one else's opinion of you matters more than yours. When you give your all to all relationships but know you've got enough just being your own best friend. When you've got enough to survive and are spending your time working on or building something that resonates deeply with yourself.
I ain't there yet but that's what making it means to me!

 

[Darryl M R]

There is definitely tiers of making it. I'm more than likely in your tier. It's the "striving" tier. No longer surviving to get by, you have time, capital, and social capital to influence more around you. As someone who grew up in poverty, I'm not a believer that wealth does not define "making it." It's not the only thing, but it is important.

Now add in the element of loving the work you do and you're in a sweet spot. More money doesn't change that much around you and you get into the hoarding tier.

I'm in my mid 20's and I'm making more money than my wife and I combined before she entered grad school. The thought of how much we would make as DINKS (before we actually try for a child), as two graduate degree holders is insane. We both have a start up itch, so we might even hit gold with an IPO one day. But the focus so far has been making enough to live comfortably, cherishing each other and our lived ones, working in a job we enjoy, and prioritizing our health and wellness.

 

[FaceHugger]

What job do you have

Also lol at the Scarface avatar

Click to shrink...

My job title is "Senior Solution Architect". I basically do a combination of things systems and network engineers do, but with a focus on automation. So sadly I write programs that put people out of jobs. It's fucked up but it pays a lot.

 

[The Unsent]

I don't want to worry about that, to be honest. The world is often a brutal and fake place and as long as I'm relaxed and get a good night sleep, I'm happy.

 

[jchap]

When I started making good money for my hobby

 

[Soriku]

My job title is "Senior Solution Architect". I basically do a combination of things systems and network engineers do, but with a focus on automation. So sadly I write programs that put people out of jobs. It's fucked up but it pays a lot.

Click to shrink...

Ok tech job. Makes sense.

 

[FaceHugger]

There is definitely tiers of making it. I'm more than likely in your tier. It's the "striving" tier. No longer surviving to get by, you have time, capital, and social capital to influence more around you. As someone who grew up in poverty, I'm not a believer that wealth does not define "making it." It's not the only thing, but it is important.

Now add in the element of loving the work you do and you're in a sweet spot. More money doesn't change that much around you and you get into the hoarding tier.

I'm in my mid 20's and I'm making more money than my wife and I combined before she entered grad school. The thought of how much we would make as DINKS (before we actually try for a child), as two graduate degree holders is insane. We both have a start up itch, so we might even hit gold with an IPO one day. But the focus so far has been making enough to live comfortably, cherishing each other and our lived ones, working in a job we enjoy, and prioritizing our health and wellness.

Click to shrink...

Thanks man. I wish you and your wife the best.

 

[Wackamole]

I never think that. But i'm perfectly happy otherwise.

 

[Deleted member 4367]

The first time we did a budget and realized how much we could put away each year and still go on cool vacations and eat out.

Dink for life man.

 

[Stickyricegirl]

I'd say you've made it! You are living comfortably and like you said budgeting isn't a necessity for you right now. I'd say not having to worry about that and feeling comfortable just doing and buying what you want is what I'd call makin' it! Being happy and satisfied with what you've got is something a lot of people never achieve - even people with more money than you could ever spend. Happy for you OP!

 

[LGHT_TRSN]

It's easy to fall into the consumer consumption machine and always desire the next big thing that the next big job will provide. I don't think you ever "make it" if you give into that system completely.

I think you've "made it" when you can look at your life and what you have and can say honestly to yourself that you have what you need and what you love to feel fulfilled.

 

[marcus]

edit: removed

 

[grang]

Kind of a high maintenance girlfriend but she's not wild about spending my money. She might go off and spend $500 on a purse or coat or something but nothing too crazy.

Click to shrink...

Yeah...you've more than made it when you can write this sentence and not think twice about it.

 

[Strike]

Financial security. I don't want to survive, I want to live.

 

[MrHedin]

I think for me it was once we had our "forever" house (at least until the kids leave and we downsize) and we both had jobs that we both like and made enough to cover everything. The feeling that we have everything we need, most of what we reasonably want, and not have to worry about trying to climb the job ladder was very freeing. Sure we would like to make a little more, especially to build up retirement savings, but we don't need to make more for our version of comfortable.

 

[Threadkular]

Having "not made it" or never having enough is one of those problems I'm told I have as an addict, but I think it's a general human problem. I think we adapt to our norm and reach homeostasis and then want to consume again. The solution is practicing gratitude.

 

[Darryl M R]

Thanks man. I wish you and your wife the best.

Click to shrink...

Same to you and your girlfriend. Hopefully you don't feel like you need to stay on the hamster wheel of corporate America for life. "Maybe I'll shoot for VP. Maybe I'll take this COO position at this start up." Maybe, maybe, maybe. Make sure to spend time reflecting on how far you came and decide how further you want to go without the pressure of others.

 

[ItRhymesWithDoom]

when enough is enough

 

[Illenium]

When I don't have to stress about potentially getting fired/quitting and not being able to make it on my own two feet until I'm dead.

 

[qaz]

removed

 

[napk1ns]

Having "not made it" or never having enough is one of those problems I'm told I have as an addict, but I think it's a general human problem. I think we adapt to our norm and reach homeostasis and then want to consume again. The solution is practicing gratitude.

Click to shrink...

Aaaand we have a winner. Too much is never enough until some gratitude adjustment happens.

 

[Septimus Prime]

 

[Soapbox Killer]

I made it out the hood and that is good enough for me.

 

[Jon Carter]

I wish I were you, OP. I think you've made it. Though I wouldn't feel complete without kids.

 

[Ra]

It's never been about money for me. I've accepted that I'm never going to have much of that at one time. I want acknowledgement.

I'll feel "I've made it" when I'm acknowledged on some scale that my warped mind seems to raise every time I achieve anything. It's never enough. How many people need to recognize me for me to stop?

At this point I need to pull off something that'll be remembered in 1,000 years or I'll be forever disappointed as I strive in futility.

Financial success brings peace? I envy you.

 

[Daingurse]

I'll let ya know once I have. Not even close to having my life together.

 

[cecilpaladin32]

I used to have a monetary view of what making it would mean to me. But as I've gotten older, I've realized that this goal means less and less. The only things that being wealthy would mean for me materially is I'd pay people to do things that I don't want to do or can't do very well (cooking/cleaning/driving) but otherwise have no real impact for me.

I think these days I'd feel like I made it if I end up with a nice girlfriend/wife one day, make enough money to easily pay necessary expenses (and still be able to save some every month), be able to retire on time with a modest lifestyle, and if/when I have a kid be able to pay for the kid's college education in full so that they incur no student loan debt.

Looking at what others have is a waste of time. Work to be happy and leave it at that.

Click to shrink...

Yup

Click to shrink...

+1. I admittedly still sometimes struggle with this (I've gotten much better though!), but comparison with others who have more than you is futile and invariably leads to frustration. My mom would always tell me to focus on what I have rather than what I don't have and realize how much I have to be thankful for, and she was right. Instead, I think it's important to be proud of what you accomplish and to try to focus on competing against yourself and bettering your own situation as much as you can.

 

[Dennis8K]

How much do you make per year?

 

[Aurica]

I think humans have a tendency to focus on what could be better, so I doubt many feel that they've made it. I think you have "made it" financially, so maybe try to focus on your happiness and what you can do with your financial freedom.

I don't have crazy standards, and I think I really can be truly happy one day. I'm really not doing anything that's getting me into that life right now, though. Life's hard.

 

[onadesertedisland]

Won't ever, don't mind it. Like my life.

 

[deftones r cool]

I make just under 40k a year and have my own house in metro Detroit. I'll be 29 next month. While I'd love to have a family one day, I must say I didnt think I'd ever make it this far and I'm happier than I've ever been. I couldn't even imagine making as much as some people in this thread are posting about. I wouldnt even know what to do with it tbh

 

[Darryl M R]

It's never been about money for me. I've accepted that I'm never going to have much of that at one time. I want acknowledgement.

I'll feel "I've made it" when I'm acknowledged on some scale that my warped mind seems to raise every time I achieve anything. It's never enough. How many people need to recognize me for me to stop?

At this point I need to pull off something that'll be remembered in 1,000 years or I'll be forever disappointed as I strive in futility.

Financial success brings peace? I envy you.

Click to shrink...

This is a post from a future Hokage. I believe in you.

 

[Deleted member 49482]

I just don't know. It seems like nothing is ever enough.

Click to shrink...

You'll have "made it" when you feel content and happy with your life and don't feel the need to compare yourself to others.

There is always going to be someone with a bigger house, larger Fidelity balance, or faster car. You make it when you figure out what YOU want and then achieve it.

 

[low-G]

Money's not that important (at least, high levels of wealth are unnecessary compared to comfortable living), but I know a lot of people who grew up in severe poverty feel that way.

I think I've almost 'made it'. Have a job I enjoy, can grow at, and pays well (but not yet as much as I deserve), I can take it easy when I want to - work from home & its a relaxed environment. I am in a long term relationship I find fulfilling and I have a kid who I get to see grow and I can see the world through her eyes. I have hobbies, interests, the things I enjoy, and do travel I enjoy. I still want to buy a very nice house, not necessarily the most expensive type but the sort of home I like, and I'd like to retire near some good forest.

I'll feel less like I've 'made it' if I become a workaholic, though. I don't want to put work at that high a priority in my life. I don't want to be putting in weekends or work late very often. The balance is key to having 'made it'.

I'm unmarried. No kids. No debt. Six figure salary. Plenty in savings and retirement. Kind of a high maintenance girlfriend but she's not wild about spending my money. She might go off and spend $500 on a purse or coat or something but nothing too crazy.

When I turned 29 I paid off all of my student loans and other debt and landed this job that pays me so much I don't even bother to budget or anything. So I thought "this is it, I finally made it. Time to go on cruise control". But then I saw how some of my bosses lived, particularly this women I used to work under (she gave me my first big break into tech) who pivoted from a job at Adobe to one at Microsoft. Her home is basically an estate, it looks like Wayne Manor from the movies. She casually showed me her Fidelity retirement account summary one day and it is literally more than I could ever earn working at my current job. Millions of dollars.

So I got to thinking. Maybe I really haven't made it yet. But I mean, how could I? Get lucky? Save the CEO's life or something and have him promote me to VP? Am I overthinking things and should just be happy? Hell should I get married? Have kids?

I just don't know. It seems like nothing is ever enough. Also sorry if I sound like a well-off jag off, I came from extreme poverty. I worked numerous kitchen jobs through college, lived in my car some weeks. $40k a year to child me would have sounded like luxurious riches. So this, actually having money, is uncharted territory for me.

Click to shrink...

Millions of dollars isn't that much to save up if you're earning six figures. I had relatives that had millions by the time they died and they were only in the six figure range and they had a child and they spent at least some of their money. I'd say that in within your grasp.

 

[FunMouse]

I'm 30 and started college late and my goals as well. I have not made it but I do have a job that pays enough for my college. I am almost done with college and hopefully within the next year or so I can land a job that is more inline with my career goal. But right now I have a job and a roof over my head and thats enough to be content for now. The day I feel I "made it" would be when I have a stable job and not having to worry about the next bill while living comfortable based on my standards.

 

[GYODX]

You'll never feel like you've made it if you keep comparing yourself to people who make more money than you.

That's why you have people with high 6 figure salaries who still feel "average", because the further up they go, the richer the people they start to compare themselves against.

The vast, vast majority of Americans will never reach the point you're currently at. To me, that's "making it". You've got no debt, a six figure salary in your early thirties, and I presume your retirement is adequately funded.

 

[Powdered Egg]

If you have a six figure job that you're happy with and someone else's bank account or house made you insecure, then you will never make it.

Those rich people you're chasing, like half of them are probably unhappy shitty parents chasing bags till their dying day.

 

[low-G]

Also what title does your boss that went to Microsoft have? Because I know people that went from my place to work at Microsoft directly after and they're nowhere near as rich as your boss, apparently...

 

[cnorwood]

Your problem is that your goals are capitalistic and ultimately that is unfulfilling as there will always be more money you can make, more deals you can make, and someone who is richer than you and may be your direct competitor. Internal fulfillment is really all you should focus on and you can if you are making a lot of money, you should have the time and resources. Anthony Bourdain and Robin William's both committed suicide and they had "dream jobs"