What embarrassing moments still haunt you?

Deleted member 11093 · Mar 16, 2018

Having the worst case of stomach rumbling during a midterm, they are LOUD as hell and pretty consistent, no way the entire class doesn't hear it.

Fucking hell. No diet ever stops this from happening to me. I read on google that students who used to get stomach rumbling during exams also get them during their job interviews.. gosh do I dread the day I go to an interview and let them go through hearing that shit. I just hope that they think I'm just hungry and not just throwing audible farts out in the open.

BWoog · Mar 16, 2018

When I was 13 at summer camp, I tried breakdancing and dislocated my knee.

In the middle of the dance floor, paramedics had to cut off my pants in front of everyone. Good times.

Deleted member 7756 · Mar 16, 2018

Fainted whilst having sex.

First time in Thailand and I wasn't doing so well with the humidity

Girl was lovely though. Met her again a few days later and continued without any issues lol.

Doctoglethorpe · Mar 16, 2018

Pretty much my entire teenage era is one big fuckin embarrassment that plays out in my head over and over and makes me want to perform a self-lobotomy.

Has Bean · Mar 16, 2018

When I was in college, my roommate (who I went to high school with) and I were bored and decided to get high and go to the mall. We both hadn't smoked much prior to college, so just a little bit went a long, long ways.

Within 5 minutes of being at the mall, we run into another HS classmate of ours who had just recently had an accident and was paralyzed from the waist down. We were so high that we handled it as badly as you can imagine - stammering, outright ignoring the situation, little eye contact, etc. I don't remember exactly what we said, but I remembering feeling like I just wanted to run fast away. That was the first and last time I ever got high and went to the mail.

scottbeowulf · Mar 16, 2018

Einchy said:
Dozing off in high school and letting a massive one rip 'cus for a second there I forgot I was in class.

I think I would have slept alot less in class if someone would have put it in my head that this could happen.
I remember falling asleep once with my head laying on my arm. I was wearing a corduroy shirt and woke up with my forehead kinda looking like Worf. Lasted for like 30 minutes.

Zen · Mar 16, 2018

Hooked up my laptop to show a YT vid to my classmates and prof. Forgot I was still logged into YT. Everyone got an eyeful of anime girl thumbnails and ear licking/eating videos.

Puck Beaverton · Mar 16, 2018

Too many to list

Transistor · Mar 16, 2018

A few that I'll save for the anonymous confessions thread

D65 · Mar 16, 2018

Surprisingly...

None of them. I don't dwell on the past anymore and all my past mistakes are part of my learning. As social creatures it makes sense our worse moments are in the presence of others. Including ones that make us look stupid and unknowing.

The best thing you can do is to not be that person after the event.

shnurgleton · Mar 16, 2018

One time I thought somebody was a big Sonic comics fan but actually they were simply talking about chili dogs

It’s Time To Go · Mar 16, 2018

I farted in class when I was in year 5 (so 10 years old or so) to the extent the teacher had to let everyone out of class for 5 minutes with every window and door open to air it out.

Yossarian · Mar 16, 2018

Let's see... all of them? Even ones that aren't, I just retroactively make them embarrassing.

Not a particularly juicy answer, but an accurate one. God, I fucking hate my brain. Freeloading, parasitic bastard.

kickz · Mar 16, 2018

gfxtwin said:
Public speaking in my advertising classes (i was inherently bad at it, shitty flow, boring voice, ugly, uninteresting, with the charisma of a log), but that's the tip of the iceberg.

This has been solved by technology;

put a podcast on and set it for like 5 to 15 min to turn off automatically

-people talk, so your brain has to shut the fuck up =D

jelly · Mar 16, 2018

kickz said:
This has been solved by technology;

put a podcast on and set it for like 5 to 15 min to turn off automatically

-people talk, so your brain has to shut the fuck up =D

What magic is this?

Yossarian · Mar 16, 2018

gfxtwin said:

GET OUT OF MY HEAD THERE IS ONLY ROOM FOR THE THREE OF US

cyress8 · Mar 16, 2018

I hyper extended my knee during military training and fell right down on the knee that was injured. Bawling like a baby because of the pain.

I was pulling myself up like the guy in the front at the top of this thing. I had my leg completly stretched out while I was coming up past the middle bar and just heard a loud crunch sound.

Fucking embarrassing to see. Plus my knee never healed right.

Blue Sky Noise · Mar 16, 2018

Common Knowledge said:
That time the pizza delivery man said, "enjoy your food", and I said, "thanks, you too." Horrible.

i do this all the time

It’s Time To Go · Mar 16, 2018

jelly said:
What magic is this?

You can do it on the podcast app on ios. You can set automatic turn off between 5/15/30/45/60 minutes.

kickz · Mar 16, 2018

jelly said:
What magic is this?

Post above explains

Mr X · Mar 16, 2018

gfxtwin said:
Public speaking in my advertising classes (i was inherently bad at it, shitty flow, boring voice, ugly, uninteresting, with the charisma of a log), but that's the tip of the iceberg.

Alternatively

tellNoel · Mar 16, 2018

I crawled on the floor of a restaurant and barked like a dog for a free burger with fries and a drink.

It wasn't about the food.
My friends said I wouldn't do it

Forsaken82 · Mar 16, 2018

One day at work about 18 years ago, we ordered Pizza, i paid for it, total cost after delivery of everything was like 9.89 or something weird, i handed the delivery guy a 10 and told him to keep the change, not realizing i just tipped the guy 11 cents...

naturally as a jewish guy, it took a while to live this down as the cheap stereotype jokes kept flying in.

It’s Time To Go · Mar 16, 2018

Oh in primary school also I blew up a used condom someone found on the football field for like, half a mars bar. Didn't know it was a used condom, just thought it was a balloon.

Robin · Mar 16, 2018

I just remembered the time I was in community college and a cute girl came back to my house with me and ky friends for break and we were watching stuff on my computer and my autocomplete said something like "extreme bondage" while she was typing in and instead of playing it cool i yanked the keyboard away and was like "uh uh uh that's not mine and if it was uh uh" and she was like "it's cool" and I just continued to stammer and avoid eye contact.

Skyebaron · Mar 16, 2018

I reached down my pants, pulled out my ass hairs and threw them at grandmas face. She was screaming at me so some got in her mouth. RIP Grandma, still miss you.

Deleted member 28564 · Mar 16, 2018

I try not to remember.

I just remembered one. I cried in class after a speech in English class. Thanks, OP.

Driggonny · Mar 16, 2018

my life is one huge embarrassing moment

Slime · Mar 16, 2018

My family had just got internet when I started 9th grade, and I got kind of addicted to MSN messenger, chat rooms and message boards. As such, I was typing "lol" a lot.

One day in gym class, a bunch of my friends were just standing around chatting and one of them said something funny. With no hesitation whatsoever, as if it was perfectly natural, instead of laughing like everyone else, I said "el oh el." It wasn't even deliberate, but I was embarrassed as fuck.

The weirdest thing is that none of them even laughed at me.

ginger ninja · Mar 16, 2018

Where is that legendary gafer who was riding the stairway knob when his in laws walked in on him. That's one I still haven't lived down for him man.

Robin · Mar 18, 2018

ginger ninja said:
Where is that legendary gafer who was riding the stairway knob when his in laws walked in on him. That's one I still haven't lived down for him man.

I said no making fun of other people!! >:0!!!

Driggonny said:
my life is one huge embarrassing moment

Drig I still think you're great, keep your chin up! Hit me up on discord if you're feeling blue.

Skyebaron said:
I reached down my pants, pulled out my ass hairs and threw them at grandmas face. She was screaming at me so some got in her mouth. RIP Grandma, still miss you.

This thread was a mistake.

Deleted member 6223 · Mar 18, 2018

In middle school while playing hoops I missed a shot with the basketball and hit the girl I liked at the time. Was very awkward for me lol.

Nikus · Mar 18, 2018

ginger ninja said:
Where is that legendary gafer who was riding the stairway knob when his in laws walked in on him. That's one I still haven't lived down for him man.

Oh yeah, perfect with what he was yelling.

MAYBE A RIMJOB FOR GOOD MEASURE.

One of my favorite threads, I nearly died of laughter.

crimsonheadGCN · Mar 18, 2018

I farted while doing sit ups in gym class.

I talked about bigfoot when the teacher asked the students to share any interesting news that they saw on tv or in the paper.

Suede · Mar 18, 2018

One that comes to mind was when I was getting undressed, the window cleaner popped up at the window, and I was only in my underwear at that moment, so I just awkwardly smiled at him while slowly backing out the room.

Augh.

PhoenixDark · Mar 18, 2018

I have 3 brothers, and when we were kids we used to hang out with a similar group of kids on the block. Playing basketball, football, Pokemon, whatever. One day, one of our friend's mom came out and suggested we head about 20 houses down the street to play with a boy she said had no friends. She said she always saw him shooting hoops by himself and felt sorry for him. So my brothers, friends, and I made the long trek down the street until we reached his house. He was outside looking sorry as fuck, all lonely and shit. So when we walked up to him I said "we heard you were looking for friends. Well, here we are." Everyone in the group busted out laughing at me, my brothers were disgusted, and even the lonely kid looked at me weirdly.

To this day, 15+ years later, my brothers still give me shit for that line. That kid was a total jerk too, we played with him for like 20 minutes and never went back to his house again. So I took the L for nothing.

AnansiThePersona · Mar 18, 2018

A girl accepting my friend request on Facebook in middle school and me going back to her old pictures liking them and commenting on them and shit. I remember that shit and wanna jump out a fucking window.

TheBeardedOne · Mar 18, 2018

I've said some dumb things without thinking, including at school when I was embarrassed by a teacher who knew I had been zoning out and almost sleeping, then asked me what day it was. I replied with the wrong one.

Another time, I was home alone and getting ready for a date. My family was out, and I didn't expect them home for a while. I showered, then as soon as I got out my phone rang downstairs and I rushed down to answer it because I was home alone. Well, I got to the table, checked my phone and then heard someone speak, that being my dad who'd come home early. Hopefully he didn't see much.

All he said was, "Well, that's a scary sight."

Stormed · Mar 18, 2018

In 7th grade, I had to go to the bathroom. While I was gone, my autistic lab partner started googling weird shit like "lady on toilet". When I came back, the teacher was blaming me for what he did.

Deleted member 2171 · Mar 18, 2018

kickz said:
This has been solved by technology;

put a podcast on and set it for like 5 to 15 min to turn off automatically

-people talk, so your brain has to shut the fuck up =D

Box fan though

whiskas_fanatic · Mar 18, 2018

I saw Ryan Gosling at a grocery store in Los Angeles. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn't want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything.
He said, "Oh, like you're doing now?"
I was taken aback, and all I could say was "Huh?" but he kept cutting me off and going "huh? huh? huh?" and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying.
The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like "Sir, you need to pay for those first." At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter.
When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually "to prevent any electrical infetterence," and then turned around and winked at me. I don't even think that's a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.

Deleted member 11426 · Mar 18, 2018

I knocked over an urn while installing dish network in someones house. Who puts an urn next to a tv though.

Dr.Phibes · Mar 18, 2018

I told my mom to have fun when she left the house to attend her fathers urn interment.

Robin · Mar 18, 2018

Selina said:
One that comes to mind was when I was getting undressed, the window cleaner popped up at the window, and I was only in my underwear at that moment, so I just awkwardly smiled at him while slowly backing out the room.

Augh.

I'd probably finger gun at the dude while crying.

capitalCORN · Mar 18, 2018

I was at a house party, and getting along really well with this girl. Then i joined a drinking game, and then [redacted]. Woke up on the couch the next morning, in nothing but my underwear, full of scrapes. And the girl was FURIOUS with me.

take_marsh · Mar 18, 2018

I once digitally painted and then printed it, pretty big, of a girl/friend who I liked (with a "humorous" twist of a little devil on the shoulder). Then I gave it to her. During a school day. In High School.

That one... I still sometimes wish I hadn't been born. I had an astounding lack of self-awareness for someone so socially anxious.

Deleted member 3534 · Mar 18, 2018

I was in a music class, playing around with the microphone trying to record different sounds. I was in the classroom all by myself at this point and I thought it would be cool to record the sound of a zipper. My pants zipper. So I had the mic in front of my crotch and I was zipping my zipper up and down but little did I realize my class and teacher were right outside at that moment looking at me.

My dad caught me humping my pillow when I was 13 when he burst into my room to announce dinner was done. I didn't come down for dinner....

ItRhymesWithDoom · Mar 18, 2018

Can't remember any for some reason.

Dad · Mar 18, 2018

A few years back, I went on an extremely strict clean, low calorie diet for several months. Had a few friends from out of town in for a weekend, so we all decided to have a games night with a big group of us. I decided, what the hell, I'd break diet and have a little bit of rum for the occasion. I didn't even get buzzed. I went from completely sober to black out drunk almost instantly. I apparently got on some weird soapbox about the Roman Empire and then vommited all over myself. Everyone else was sober. It was fucking awful

kickz · Mar 18, 2018

FyreWulff said:
Box fan though

Suppose this works to, but its hard in the winter to turn one on. So podcasts is a year round solution.

What embarrassing moments still haunt you?

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▲ Legend ▲

The Wise Ones

Vodka martini, dirty, with Tito's please

Restless Insomniac

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Restless Insomniac

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Gotham's Finest

Started a revolution but the mic was unplugged

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Restless Insomniac

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