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We had (one of) our work Christmas parties today and I felt like I was having a panic attack the whole time

ExhaustedWalrus

ExhaustedWalrus

Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,850
We have two parties. One with the entire division I'm a part of (the one today) and one with my immediate team (much smaller and next week). We had it at a brewery downtown, and there were probably close to 100 people packed in there. It was cramped, I was sweaty and I felt like I was being seen from all directions.

They had a prize drawing, which I couldn't participate in since I'm a contractor (which they rudely told me), so I bolted after they handed out the prizes. It fucking sucked.

What's your opinion on company/office Christmas parties? Does anyone else get extremely uncomfortable? I just felt like I didn't belong or want to be there.
 
CloseTalker

CloseTalker

Member
Oct 25, 2017
30,583
I don't go to mine. I love my job, and the people are work with are lovely, but I have absolutely zero desire to spend time with them outside of work. Our company has quite a few off-hours activities, and I've never really gone to any of them. I work hard for eight hours, then get the hell out.
 
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ExhaustedWalrus

ExhaustedWalrus

Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,850
CloseTalker said:
I don't go to mine. I love my job, and the people are work with are lovely, but I have absolutely zero desire to spend time with them outside of work. Our company has quite a few off-hours activities, and I've never really gone to any of them. I work hard for eight hours, then get the hell out.
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I wish I could do this but they really push us to go to every event.
 

Deleted member 41178

User requested account closure
Banned
Mar 18, 2018
2,903
I enjoy our company Xmas party, usually just over 100 people there.

Now that I'm a little older I usually leave after the food and only have a few drinks. 5 or 6 years ago I would have been out clubbing with the rest of the until 4am but those days are now behind me I think.
 

Cokie Bear

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Banned
Oct 27, 2017
4,944
Are you the guy who posts a bunch of threads about hating his job? Or am I confusing you with another poster?

if it is you, find a new job.
 
AstronaughtE

AstronaughtE

Member
Nov 26, 2017
10,196
I typically can't handle company xmas parties. I hate going to parties with lousy food, that wastes my time and drains my cash. All I want for Christmas from my work is time off, and if that's not possible, just dont make me come to your party.
 
Septimus Prime

Septimus Prime

EA
Verified
Oct 25, 2017
8,500
I don't know most of the people at the company holiday party, and most people are there with their SOs anyway. I'm mainly there for the food, drink, and festivities.

Studio parties, on the other hand, are super fun because I know everyone, and we're all hanging out in a non-work context.
 
Ryuhza

Ryuhza

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
11,431
San Diego County
Yep, sounds like you had a panic attack. I get them around crowds a fair bit too, especially those of total strangers. Happened to me a few years back at an art museum, of all places. I was supposed to write a paper on a painting, and I just couldn't take being there. Came back a few days later and I was fine, but it was also less busy. Something similar happened more recently at a bookstore. Just that insane feeling of being watched and judged. I tanked an assignment to get out of there.

Primal instinct going haywire with my brain, I figure.
 
nded

nded

Member
Nov 14, 2017
10,563
We just do an extended lunch with company provided food and some kind of game or trivia contest. It's fun and I appreciate that they're not trying to cut into my personal time.
 
Valkyr

Valkyr

Member
Oct 26, 2017
2,934
There are very few work events that I attend but my company also doesn't do a whole lot of them. There is a Christmas party but it's like a Christmas Ball for the whole division which would a TON of people an I've never heard of anyone I know who works there actually going to it. I pretty much attend the 1 charity event they do each year and that's it. I will sometimes go to a ball game if there is like a team outing or something too. Only happy hours that ever happen are usually for people that are retiring because the company won't actually sponsor them usually.
 
krazen

krazen

Member
Oct 27, 2017
13,123
Gentrified Brooklyn
Im pretty sociable but I hate forced events. My bosses love to text (which I find unprofessional) and I remember being at a rock show with shitty reception and having my phone blow up from my bosses texting us to pop into a happy hour with another team presumably because nobody showed up and they felt embarassed. Just a bunch of chain txt's of employees making excuses for not being at a function they shouldn't have to give a fuck about.

This was after a few months where they fired a bunch of people out of nowhere.
 

ChrisJSY

Member
Oct 29, 2017
2,053
I am very very uncomfortable In social situations and mustered the courage to go to last year's and it went fine. This year I am equally worried, mostly due to the unknown random seating plan that you only know when you get there and I hate being forced to sit with random people I don't know. I got lucky last year sitting with someone I directly worked with.

It is also happening right after I have been up 14 hours for a shift. The only team in the company that works on the day of the event, poor sods who cover us don't get to go at all.
 

Deleted member 33533

Banned
Nov 17, 2017
12,864
It's fine, I guess. Free food and alcohol so I can't complain. It's not as if I'm super excited about them though.

AstronaughtE said:
I typically can't handle company xmas parties. I hate going to parties with lousy food, that wastes my time and drains my cash. All I want for Christmas from my work is time off, and if that's not possible, just dont make me come to your party.
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They make you pay for your company holiday party?
 
ReAxion

ReAxion

Member
Oct 26, 2017
3,882
we used to have them and now we don't. i'd rather have them than not, i think. ask me again if they start them up again for a few years.
 
flaxknuckles

flaxknuckles

Member
Oct 25, 2017
4,302
I've went to one in my life and it sucked. There was just a small table with a bunch of people I never talked to and I just sat there eating and being awkward as hell. I did get a laugh out of someone opening my last-minute Secret Santa gift which was a electric Spider-Man toothbrush.
 
Aldi

Aldi

Member
Oct 27, 2017
4,634
United Kingdom
Ours is next Friday. I'm going to be honest, I'm only going because I'm fairly new and I don't want to be that guy that doesn't show up. There are alot of people that work for this company that I have no desire to socialise with, I'll try to sneak out early when everyone inevitably gets drunk.
 

Deleted member 21411

Account closed at user request
Banned
Oct 28, 2017
4,907
I hate Christmas because it triggers a lot of dark memories for me so my work is nightmarish this time of year. I look like an ass hole but I just can't do these gatherings this time of year
 
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KentP

KentP

Member
Oct 28, 2017
703
Yep, social anxiety drives me to make up excuses (where needed) to avoid all and any work parties these days
 
peteykirch

peteykirch

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,831
I didn't go to mine last year. This year, it went from an After Work thing, now a Holiday Luncheon between 12-3:30PM, and you can go home afterwards.

If you don't go, you have to work until 5PM.

I'll go, and try to make my escape as quickly as possible.
 
Soapbox Killer

Soapbox Killer

Member
Oct 28, 2017
27,090
I'm going to the Christmas party at my old job for shits and giggles. I know a lot of people there and there will be booze so yeah Christmas parties are ok with me. I've only been at this gig since May but if it's a party happening, I'm in there.



It does suck to be a contractor at company functions. There is too much exclusion in those situations. But fuck it, grab a beer and let it burn.
 
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ExhaustedWalrus

ExhaustedWalrus

Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,850
xxracerxx said:
Seriously though, you don't need to go to these functions even if they push you to do so.
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I guess I feel a sense of danger if I don't go. I don't know, it's like if you don't go, you'll be on a watchlist to be fired or something. I don't have proof of that but that's the vibe I get. And being a contractor it's worse, cause I want to work there full time, but then stuff like this turns me off.
 
mentallyinept

mentallyinept

One Winged Slayer
Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,403
I like mine.

As much food and booze as I can consume and my coworkers are pretty great.

Except for a couple I know for a fact are Trumpers. Ugh.
 
xxracerxx

xxracerxx

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
31,222
ExhaustedWalrus said:
I guess I feel a sense of danger if I don't go. I don't know, it's like if you don't go, you'll be on a watchlist to be fired or something. I don't have proof of that but that's the vibe I get. And being a contractor it's worse, cause I want to work there full time, but then stuff like this turns me off.
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You are overthinking a lot about this workplace (from your other threads), if you are doing good work and not an absolute ass while in the office you are more than likely not on the chopping block because you don't go to 1 of 2 holiday parties.
 
Seirith

Seirith

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,309
My former company put on an awesome party, they rented a party room at a hotel complete with dinner, drinks and a DJ. People danced, drank and had a fun time. There was also a rooftop deck with a fire pit and if people wanted to stay at the hotel due to drinking, they organized discounted rates. A lot of people stayed the night but I went home since I don't drink.
 
JilloftheJungle

JilloftheJungle

Member
Oct 27, 2017
360
Mine is during work hours so I participate. No booze though, just food and raffles. My last job tho was cool seeing the lab directed get wasted and it's fun - I/past co-workers still go and get drunk lol
 
Einbroch

Einbroch

Member
Oct 25, 2017
17,978
I like mine, but I hate my wife's. I don't know anyone and they just want to talk about work stuff. I either get smashed or I find a corner and dick around on my phone, unless there's an activity.

Last year I found a fellow spouse and we talked about Alaska for a bit. Sometimes you try to seek out a fellow introvert and go "this shit sucks" and see how they respond.
 
SilkySm00th

SilkySm00th

Member
Oct 31, 2017
4,801
ExhaustedWalrus said:
I guess I feel a sense of danger if I don't go. I don't know, it's like if you don't go, you'll be on a watchlist to be fired or something. I don't have proof of that but that's the vibe I get. And being a contractor it's worse, cause I want to work there full time, but then stuff like this turns me off.
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You seem way too stressed here, my guy. Like - unless you are actually way terrible at your job and just basically managing to convince people you know what your doing even though your madly out of your depth - you're not gonna get fired cause you didn't go to a holiday party?

Like... that's some wild shit to be worried about. I've worked a lot of places and everywhere throws a holiday thing of one size or another. I've never felt like i HAD to go to any of them - occasionally felt like i missed out when I hear after the fact how Daniel from Project management showed her tits at the afterparty or something but that's about it.
 
Jogi

Jogi

Prophet of Regret
Member
Jul 4, 2018
5,445
ExhaustedWalrus said:
We have two parties. One with the entire division I'm a part of (the one today) and one with my immediate team (much smaller and next week). We had it at a brewery downtown, and there were probably close to 100 people packed in there. It was cramped, I was sweaty and I felt like I was being seen from all directions.

They had a prize drawing, which I couldn't participate in since I'm a contractor (which they rudely told me), so I bolted after they handed out the prizes. It fucking sucked.

What's your opinion on company/office Christmas parties? Does anyone else get extremely uncomfortable? I just felt like I didn't belong or want to be there.
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Are you me? I have mine coming up this Friday at a Brewery and I'm legit trying to bail haha
 
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ExhaustedWalrus

ExhaustedWalrus

Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,850
SilkySm00th said:
You seem way too stressed here, my guy. Like - unless you are actually way terrible at your job and just basically managing to convince people you know what your doing even though your madly out of your depth - you're not gonna get fired cause you didn't go to a holiday party?

Like... that's some wild shit to be worried about. I've worked a lot of places and everywhere throws a holiday thing of one size or another. I've never felt like i HAD to go to any of them - occasionally felt like i missed out when I hear after the fact how Daniel from Project management showed her tits at the afterparty or something but that's about it.
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I mean, everybody's always a little out of depth in their job. I didn't go to college to do what I do now (and that is besides the point), and I feel like I do a good job. Sometimes I feel I have to be perfect and one little mistake or glimpse of me messing up will make them fire me.
 
SilkySm00th

SilkySm00th

Member
Oct 31, 2017
4,801
ExhaustedWalrus said:
I mean, everybody's always a little out of depth in their job. I didn't go to college to do what I do now (and that is besides the point), and I feel like I do a good job. Sometimes I feel I have to be perfect and one little mistake or glimpse of me messing up will make them fire me.
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Nah man. You're good. You do what you gotta do to feel confident and ok in your life - so go if you feel like you gotta - but believe us when we say that the chances of you getting in some shit or having a bad experience after the fact are pretty small.
Weighed against how uncomfortable the setting and crowds make you i'd say the decision is easy but I know it's hard parsing and dealing with the many crazy thoughts and insecurities we all have everyday so make your decision and barrel on through the next month and a half resting easy in the knowledge that -at the very least- this shit is over relatively quickly lol

GL my man, have fun.
 
Reeks

Reeks

Self-requested ban
Banned
Oct 27, 2017
1,326
Sorry OP. That blows. I hate forced fun events, especially with coworkers. Don't feel like you need to stick around. I usually pop in and quickly leave when no one is looking.

As a sidebar, sounds like an anxiety attack, not a panic attack.
 
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ExhaustedWalrus

ExhaustedWalrus

Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,850
SilkySm00th said:
Nah man. You're good. You do what you gotta do to feel confident and ok in your life - so go if you feel like you gotta - but believe us when we say that the chances of you getting in some shit or having a bad experience after the fact are pretty small.
Weighed against how uncomfortable the setting and crowds make you i'd say the decision is easy but I know it's hard parsing and dealing with the many crazy thoughts and insecurities we all have everyday so make your decision and barrel on through the next month and a half resting easy in the knowledge that -at the very least- this shit is over relatively quickly lol

GL my man, have fun.
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I think one of the things that amplified the attack was that I was working from home and just showed up to see all of my coworkers in one room - it was really jarring. I don't know, it's like I can't take just showing up somewhere being expected to be social, I have to sort be eased into it.
 
Desi

Desi

Member
Oct 30, 2017
4,210
I'm always invited to my friends holiday parties. Always have a ton of fun but then again I love free booze, food, swag, and conversation. Drugs also a plus but that goes without saying.
 
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