Michael Cohen testifies on Capitol Hill (over)

[thecouncil]

Imagine Donald Trump thinking you're an incompetent moron.

 

[Deleted member 50969]

I love the MC basically told DJT white supporters that he doesn't care about you.

 

[SwampBastard]

he doesn't like people captured? RIP

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This is old news, man.

 

[Not Asleep]

Oh man, every late night host is going to have a field day with the Don Jr part of this statement.

 

[Annoying Old Party Man]

Best to not get your hopes up and just be pleasantly surprised when something good does happen.

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If nothing comes out and it is just to belittle Trump, I can easily see him turning this around - his rhetoric has always been that he is the accused one because he tells it like it is. We all know what a fucking bastard he is - but something needs to happen.

 

[OrdinaryPrime]

Cummings is absolutely right - we have no reason to trust anything that comes out of Cohen's mouth.

But, this is so cathartic to see every news site covering it. To see someone being so raw about how terrible Trump is.

Here's hoping there's more evidence held up for the Mueller investigation.

For now, let's enjoy some schadenfreude and some ridiculous Twitch chat.

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PogChamp

 

[marrec]

I'm going to ask again. Is this for show only? Will something come out of it? Will there be legal repercussions from it?

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This is more for public show, but remember Cohen has already had long interviews with Mueller's team and just yesterday had an hours long behind closed doors testimony with Congress. Legal repercussions for Cohen's assertions will have already begun taking place within currently occurring investigations.

 

[Owzers]

The GOP basically have Cohens old job now, lie and cover for trump, and are mad the old guy is still around.

 

[Lifendz]

Please let him have more audio tapes of Trump conspiring to break the law.

 

[daveo42]

Fire on Don Jr and the comments that it was more likely that Trump set up the infamous Russian meeting cause Jr is a fucking moron. Whew lawd.

 

[Ashdroid]

Like father, like son. LUL

 

[Deception]

Actors are on the phone with their agents right now to secure this role. For the speech.

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My vote is for Mark Ruffalo to play Cohen.

 

[DoubleTake]

Actors are on the phone with their agents right now to secure this role. For the speech.

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So true. This Movie/Series is gonna be sought after hard.

 

[MisterSnrub]

I'm just going to repeat this to further emphasise that Michael Cohen improvised his Vietnam/ironic crack. Guy just went for it., camstare and all

 

[Goodstyle]

I hate that none of this will matter.

 

[Deleted member 2321]

Yeah, that´s nothing.

This is not gonna bring Trump one inch closer to impeachment.

 

[Kaako]

"Nor would I accept a pardon, by president Trump."

 

[Nightbird]

"I have lied"

All the GOP needs

 

[PassiveObserver]

"I'm no longer your fixer, Mr. Trump." Oscar-bait right there.

 

[Joeku]

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lmao Megasoum when'd you retweet this?

 

[TheGhost]

Imagine addressing Jordan as "my esteemed colleague" and then immediately getting shit on by the same piece of shit.

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Exactly...like....twice in a ten minute window. That was horrible

 

[Ephonk]

haha calls him mobster

 

[Lonestar]

"I find it ironic that you're in Vietnam right now."

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[Brinbe]

Just like Donaghy and Canseco. You should believe him 100%

He has literal receipts

 

[Jag]

Ben Stiller needs to play him in the upcoming Adam McCay drama/comedy.

 

[RoKKeR]

I hate that none of this will matter.

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Just enjoy the ride man.

 

[Foffy]

Jesus christ this is a good narration.

Can't wait for people to ask for racist examples...

 

[Saya]

Actors are on the phone with their agents right now to secure this role. For the speech.

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[Zoph]

I'm just going to repeat this to further emphasise that Michael Cohen improvised his Vietnam/ironic crack. Guy just went for it., camstare and all

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It's in the submitted transcript, though.

 

[DeathbyVolcano]

Yeah, that´s nothing.

This is not gonna bring Trump one inch closer to impeachment.

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Pretty much. The GOP is too wrapped up with him now.

 

[Vincent Alexander]

I hate that none of this will matter.

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It will piss Trump off more than anything that has happened before. Trump already isn't bright when he is calm. I wonder what he'll do pissed off?

 

[Deleted member 1589]

Ben Stiller needs to play him in the upcoming Adam McCay drama/comedy.

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Mark Wahlberg

 

[Window]

I'm just going to repeat this to further emphasise that Michael Cohen improvised his Vietnam/ironic crack. Guy just went for it., camstare and all

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That wasn't part of the leaked statement?

 

[PMS341]

I'm just going to repeat this to further emphasise that Michael Cohen improvised his Vietnam/ironic crack. Guy just went for it., camstare and all

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The Vietnam line was in the leaked speech from last night.

 

[Shard Shinjuku]

Oh boy, the mob analogy!

 

[DiceHands]

I hate that none of this will matter.

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If you keep saying this shit all the time, they win. Take that defeatist attitude somewhere else.

 

[HotTakeCakes]

He actually called him a mobster.

This is fucking great.

 

[FaceHugger]

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[Madison]

"I find it ironic that you're in Vietnam right now."

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This one will go on the poster for the movie

 

[Deleted member 2913]

I can't get over TV Lawyer. lmao

 

[Nappuccino]

It will piss Trump off more than anything that has happened before. Trump already isn't bright when he is calm. I wonder what he'll do pissed off?

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Probably arrange to have us all blown up. So that'll be fun.

 

[Mgs2master2]

"Unleash his TV lawyer" Hahahahhaa I mean I read this, but its awesome to hear it.

 

[FuturusX]

Right on schedule, my neighbors are having sex in the shower, where the wall is thinnest. So I'm listening to Michael Cohen spit hot truth about the president against the background noises of a woman cumming.

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Quite the remix, you should record it and upload it to YouTube!

 

[Netherscourge]

The fact that Don Jr. is signing checks to pay for his dad's Porn Star payoff is the most cringey thing I've ever heard.

-Hey Son! Sign this check for me? I have to pay this lady I banged to stay quiet so Melania doesn't find out!

/barf

 

[Catdaddy]

I hate that none of this will matter.

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True...his base is stupid and will believe whatever he says..SAD!

 

[Sparkedglory2]

Tv lawyer is the best thing i've heard all day

 

[daveo42]

I hate that none of this will matter.

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Just let us have one good day. Please.

 

[Chuck]

"TV lawyer" is fucking gooooooooood

 

[Deleted member 733]

Yeah, that´s nothing.

This is not gonna bring Trump one inch closer to impeachment.

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Why do you feel this way? He specifically cited evidence like the checks / records. That might at least be worth an inch.

 

[stupei]

I'm just going to repeat this to further emphasise that Michael Cohen improvised his Vietnam/ironic crack. Guy just went for it., camstare and all

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It was definitely in CNN write ups as of yesterday.