Warhammer 40K for Young Readers

Keasar · May 21, 2018

Coyote Starrk said:
What is that gif from?

It looks pretty funny

"If The Emperor Had A Text-to-Speech Device", a show where the immortal Emperor after millennia finally gets a device installed that enables him to speak again, of which he immediately proceeds use to take out his 10.000 years of frustration and anger.

It starts as a couple of episodes of the Emperor learning what has happened to his Imperium during his absence but then spins out into this quite massive and entertaining plot, based a lot on what material was available at the time of the (very) stagnant WH40K universe (before the whole 8th Edition plot advance occurred). It is a quite hilarious take on an absurd universe with many jokes around how absolutely hilarious many aspects of it is.

Here is a remake of the first episode, the first couple of episodes are kinda low quality compared to now so the first was remade to give a better sense of current quality, recommend giving that a watch:

Coyote Starrk · May 21, 2018

Keasar said:
"If The Emperor Had A Text-to-Speech Device", a show where the immortal Emperor after millennia finally gets a device installed that enables him to speak again, of which he immediately proceeds use to take out his 10.000 years of frustration and anger.

It starts as a couple of episodes of the Emperor learning what has happened to his Imperium during his absence but then spins out into this quite massive and entertaining plot, based a lot on what material was available at the time of the (very) stagnant WH40K universe (before the whole 8th Edition plot advance occurred). It is a quite hilarious take on an absurd universe with many jokes around how absolutely hilarious many aspects of it is.

Here is a remake of the first episode, the first couple of episodes are kinda low quality compared to now so the first was remade to give a better sense of current quality, recommend giving that a watch:

That sounds like alot of fun. I will be bookmarking that for sure.

I have always seen bits and pieces of the lore and it seems like deep and interesting lore. Its just kind of hard to wrap your head around it all and know where to start.

Siggy-P · May 21, 2018

Pilgrimzero said:
That's GWs biggest issue (and always has been), game/world is cool but so damn expensive. The other is your favorite army might not see an update in decades.

Sisters finally getting a real update *cries with joy*

Seriously. There are quite a few people I genuinelly could have convinced to by armies that didn't once they saw how much it was.

I don't mind the new kits being as much as they are, but dammit the kits from back in 2003 shouldn't be the exact same price today as they were then. It'd be a good way to get people into it and more invested in buying expensive models for their armies when they're updated later.

Contramann · May 21, 2018

The book on the left isn't for 40k it's for Fantasy battle.

Actinium · May 21, 2018

If GW wants to attract new young players because the hobby is shrinking and becoming increasingly insular they need to start lowering prices and making more small scale intro products. Kids already want warhammer stuff because it's goofy lovable heavy metal album cover lookin stuff that is fun to collect and paint, same as the adults do. This product seems more like it wants to trick people, you can't sell kids' parents on a family friendly adventure setting only to have them pick up a necron codex and see knife robots wearing people's skin.

Pop-O-Matic · May 21, 2018

Contramann said:
The book on the left isn't for 40k it's for Fantasy battle.

Fantasy Battle got discontinued a few years ago. It's for Age of Sigmar.

Griselbrand · May 21, 2018

Actinium said:
If GW wants to attract new young players because the hobby is shrinking and becoming increasingly insular they need to start lowering prices and making more small scale intro products.

They've been doing just that.

There are several starter sets, at least one for each faction, and some two player sets which come with a mat and simple terrain along with colored plastic, two or three piece minis. Compared to other wargames it's still expensive (wargaming as a whole is not cheap anyway) but there are savings to be found still. Especially compared to years ago.

Related to that, GW has been posting serious gains year over year lately. AoS has been a huge success for them in particular.

Watercolour · May 21, 2018

The Immortal Emperor would not approve.

Pilgrimzero · May 21, 2018

Griselbrand said:
They've been doing just that.

There are several starter sets, at least one for each faction, and some two player sets which come with a mat and simple terrain along with colored plastic, two or three piece minis. Compared to other wargames it's still expensive (wargaming as a whole is not cheap anyway) but there are savings to be found still. Especially compared to years ago.

Related to that, GW has been posting serious gains year over year lately. AoS has been a huge success for them in particular.

They always "make money" but $50 for a box of basic Tac Marines is dumb.

I've started to pick up the new Star Wars mini war game and it's 1. Star Wars 2. Half the cost of GW

Actinium · May 21, 2018

Griselbrand said:
They've been doing just that.

The dark imperium and know no fear sets are i guess better than it has been for like 10 years, but you used to be able to get a starter paint set with a squad of 6 marines for 24 bucks, right now a starter paint set comes with 3 primaris marines and costs more than twice as much at 50. Inflation is a thing, sure, but no 10 year old can mow a couple lawns and add a squad to their army like they used to, even very budget minded players need to shell out as much as a used car. You can't compete with video games and beyblades or whatever with the current pricing structure, and releasing some kid scholastic looking adventure books isn't going to onboard kids like an affordable squad+paint set would.

GaijinDensetsu · May 21, 2018

The prices of some individual sets are bad but there are good deals. Most of the start collecting boxes are a great value, as are the core sets. I think a lot of people fall into the trap of buying whole armies up front, when really they should be building and painting a little at a time.

NathanS · May 21, 2018

Oh good, stories about how right Fascism is. This is what we need to be giving to kids. Every single thing about Warhammer 40K is changed for me to be okay about this at all.

Deleted member 7082 · May 21, 2018

best 40k fiction that isn't 40k fiction:

tumour_love · May 21, 2018

NathanS said:
Oh good, stories about how right Fascism is. This is what we need to be giving to kids. Every single thing about Warhammer 40K is changed for me to be okay about this at all.

Pop-O-Matic · May 21, 2018

Megatherium said:
best 40k fiction that isn't 40k fiction:

2nd best, you mean. 1st place has been locked up for ages by Event Horizon.

Keasar · May 22, 2018

Coyote Starrk said:
That sounds like alot of fun. I will be bookmarking that for sure.

I have always seen bits and pieces of the lore and it seems like deep and interesting lore. Its just kind of hard to wrap your head around it all and know where to start.

There are three sites for lore reading that I go to, Lexicanum which is the most lore dense site I know. Just a heavy focus on everything in-lore and canon. The Warhammer 40K wiki which is a bit of a easier read. And, while sadly associated with a pretty bad crowd, the site I would argue is probably the most abridged and easiest introduction to the insanity of Warhammer 40K, 1d4chan. At times pretty NSFW and have quite inflammatory language but they are pretty good at summarizing the whole mess. And there is A LOT of mess to go through. There are also a ton of lore podcasts with introduction episodes out there that should be easy to find out on Youtube as well so quite recommend checking around there.

Warhammer 40K is absolutely awesome and remains my favourite sci-fantasy universe in existence, still waiting for a worthy movie or TV show to bring this thing to the masses that isn't the weird Ultrasmurfs movie.

Nemesis Warlock · May 22, 2018

What?

I mean, I'll buy it, but... What?!

(I mean, how does the child of a Rogue Trader meet up and have adventures with a Skitarii kid?)

Mockerre · May 22, 2018

A bit bummed by this. WH, especially 40k, is - and I say it with a heavy heart, because I have a soft spot for the universe and also think its creators didn't intend it this way - like an introduction to alt-right philosophies.

pochi · May 22, 2018

Baka! It's not like I want to sacrifice you or something!

Dictator · May 22, 2018

Mockerre said:
A bit bummed by this. WH, especially 40k, is - and I say it with a heavy heart, because I have a soft spot for the universe and also think its creators didn't intend it this way - like an introduction to alt-right philosophies.

I lik emore people getting into 40, but you have a point here I guess.
The one thing that is negative about this all, is that it "white washes" a bit what the imperium is. Sure you can be heroic as an individual or group in battle, saving innocents, sacraficing yourself... what have you. But the "nuanced" idea of the imperium being a horrible place and regime may not come across in these children's text. I mean... I think that is a great thing for children to appreciate if they can.

Feral · May 22, 2018

Mockerre said:
A bit bummed by this. WH, especially 40k, is - and I say it with a heavy heart, because I have a soft spot for the universe and also think its creators didn't intend it this way - like an introduction to alt-right philosophies.

well, the Imperium in the WH40k universe is kind of a parody of both the fascist 20th century regimes and medieval fanatical faith, and I'd say the lore regularly reminds the reader that the Imperium are in fact not the good guys, it has become a horrifically twisted and perverted version of what the now powerless Emperor intended. Humans are put through the meatgrinder in the millions and a single life is completely worthless. Of course, this context would probably get lost in the kids-friendly version

Страна Мечты · May 22, 2018

Megatherium said:
best 40k fiction that isn't 40k fiction:

avg_ss13_round.jpg

Calabi · May 22, 2018

Menace said:
well, the Imperium in the WH40k universe is kind of a parody of both the fascist 20th century regimes and medieval fanatical faith, and I'd say the lore regularly reminds the reader that the Imperium are in fact not the good guys, it has become a horrifically twisted and perverted version of what the now powerless Emperor intended. Humans are put through the meatgrinder in the millions and a single life is completely worthless. Of course, this context would probably get lost in the kids-friendly version

Someone did mention that parody's and satires can sometimes have the opposite intended effect, if there not done well. Its hard to say if WH40 is strictly a satire/parody, it is but I can see how people could take it straight.

BossAttack · May 22, 2018

Dictator said:
I lik emore people getting into 40, but you have a point here I guess.
The one thing that is negative about this all, is that it "white washes" a bit what the imperium is. Sure you can be heroic as an individual or group in battle, saving innocents, sacraficing yourself... what have you. But the "nuanced" idea of the imperium being a horrible place and regime may not come across in these children's text. I mean... I think that is a great thing for children to appreciate if they can.

Calabi said:
Someone did mention that parody's and satires can sometimes have the opposite intended effect, if there not done well. Its hard to say if WH40 is strictly a satire/parody, it is but I can see how people could take it straight.

This is what I was alluding to in my earlier post about WH40k being already for 12 year olds. Sure, the series was originally rooted squarely within satire, it made sure you understood that the Imperium was fucking horrible and not something to be emulated. But, these days they lean too hard into the awesomeness of the Imperium and Space Marines to seriously call it satire, shit even the Eisenhorn novels I read were more interested in showing how fucking badass the Inquisitors were than espousing any sort of actual theme. Thus, the idea that the "adult" books are more "nuanced" just doesn't really hold water these days. Thus, I don't know how much harm the series can do by introducing full on fascism to kids as a good/cool thing. After all, the Empire in Star Wars is fascist and kids love Stormtroopers. I don't know how much harm that can do to a developing mind.

HStallion · May 22, 2018

BossAttack said:
This is what I was alluding to in my earlier post about WH40k being already for 12 year olds. Sure, the series originally rooted squarely within satire, it made sure you understood that the Imperium was fucking horrible and not something to be emulated. But, these days they lean too hard into the awesomeness of the Imperium and Space Marines to seriously call it satire, shit even the Eisenhorn novels I read were more interested in showing how fucking badass the Inquisitors were than espousing any sort of actual theme. Thus, the idea that the "adult" books are more "nuanced" just doesn't really hold water these days. Thus, I don't know how much harm the series can do by introducing full on fascism to kids as a good/cool thing. After all, the Empire in Star Wars is fascist and kids love Stormtroopers. I don't know how much harm that can do to a developing mind.

That's why kids need to be introduced to the real good guys, the forces of Chaos.

Dictator · May 22, 2018

BossAttack said:
Thus, the idea that the "adult" books are more "nuanced" just doesn't really hold water these days.

You read any 30K as of late? The Horus Heresy stuff? The imperium rather often does not come across as good at all.

Asmodai48 · May 22, 2018

Wtf is this shit LOL

DouglasteR · May 22, 2018

What could possible go wrong ?

"Papa, i crushed my friend at the school today'' !

- What ? For what ?

- FOR THE BLOOD LAD papa !

Feral · May 22, 2018

I liked the old story where a squad of Space Marines killed their Sisters of Battle allies and bathed in their blood for an extra ward save roll against demonic corruption. Nothing but pragmatic, those Space Marines. Also, sending waves of thousands of Imperial Guards to their gruesome deaths to tire out the enemy lines as phase one of their standard mode of engagement

Pilgrimzero · May 22, 2018

So is each book going to cost like $75 so the kids know what they are getting into?

Perturabo · May 22, 2018

Menace said:
I liked the old story where a squad of Space Marines killed their Sisters of Battle allies and bathed in their blood for an extra ward save roll against demonic corruption. Nothing but pragmatic, those Space Marines. Also, sending waves of thousands of Imperial Guards to their gruesome deaths to tire out the enemy lines as phase one of their standard mode of engagement

Thank fuck that was retconned.

Feral · May 22, 2018

Perturabo said:
Thank fuck that was retconned.

really? Booh!

Pilgrimzero · May 22, 2018

Perturabo said:
Thank fuck that was retconned.

Just one of many examples of when "We need to show how awesome these guys are, let's have have wipe out some SoB!"

Greigor the FellHand · May 22, 2018

starpower said:

imperial child: " Tell me a bed time story oh glorious dreadnaught?"
Dreadnaught: " Once upon a time I came across a heretical band of Xenos..."
Dreadnaught: " they were prancing all merrily, upon the emperors sacred world of balthe"
Dreadnaught: " and so i joined the merrily dance, and ripped their horse in twain, then I threw it at the xenos and burned them all."
Dreadnaught: ' THE EMPORER PROTECTS"
imperial child: " Night metal man"

Perturabo · May 22, 2018

Pilgrimzero said:
Just one of many examples of when "We need to show how awesome these guys are, let's have have wipe out some SoB!"

Which is why I will always recommend the Sisters of Battle omnibus. It's a fantastic read.

droog · May 22, 2018

Gareth said:
So it's aimed at 8-12 year olds. Pretty common age for people just starting Warhammer. I started aged 10 and would've been all over these.

Yep, same here. Even at that age I knew the setting for 40K (Rogue Trader, I'm so old) was clearly satirical.

Keasar · May 22, 2018

To see a future generation where a little girl get the question "So who's your role model?" and this image pops up on the auditorium screen:

And in the back your hear a voice going "That's my girl~"

I wouldn't mind it.

Mockerre · May 22, 2018

Dictator said:
I lik emore people getting into 40, but you have a point here I guess.
The one thing that is negative about this all, is that it "white washes" a bit what the imperium is. Sure you can be heroic as an individual or group in battle, saving innocents, sacraficing yourself... what have you. But the "nuanced" idea of the imperium being a horrible place and regime may not come across in these children's text. I mean... I think that is a great thing for children to appreciate if they can.

Menace said:
well, the Imperium in the WH40k universe is kind of a parody of both the fascist 20th century regimes and medieval fanatical faith, and I'd say the lore regularly reminds the reader that the Imperium are in fact not the good guys, it has become a horrifically twisted and perverted version of what the now powerless Emperor intended. Humans are put through the meatgrinder in the millions and a single life is completely worthless. Of course, this context would probably get lost in the kids-friendly version

I know what it was supposed to be - but Starship Troopers it isn't. The 'parody of fascism' and 'nuanced' may have been a part of it at its inception, but they're really not part of what WH40k was for the last 20 or so years. Pick up any Space Marine codex and read the fluff, it's all straight. The Imperium may be shown as horrible, but it's 'all for the greater good'. Those of other faiths, those that are alien or different, they are the real enemy.

The white, almost exclusively male, hypermasculine warmachines safeguard the world by serving thier God-Emperor.

"Beware the alien, the heretic, and the mutant."
"Burn the heretic. Kill the mutant. Purge the unclean."

These are used unironically in in-game text and outside, by fans.

And listen, I still like aspects of it as an adult, and I'm also not inclined to turn fascist because of it. But what is a 10-12 year old supposed to think of it? It's the heroes.

I think it's a part of a larger discussion, about how fantasy and games (video games too) glorify totalitaristic regimes that fight the greater evil (very real in their fictinonal universes), while completely missing the fact that real world totalitarian regimes invent fictional enemies to legitimize their rule. It's kinda depressing.

adj_noun · May 22, 2018

Let's check out the characters in the 40K line.

We have a pacifist, tech savvy arachnophobe, an imperial guard draft dodging gang member with a heart of gold, and a prosthesis wearing misanthrope who needs to learn the power of friendship.

I'd guess that the Warhammer 40K grimdark will be turned way down to make room for Saturday morning style cartoon battles and moral lessons.

though necron players should get ready for their faction to get schooled by a bunch of tweens

Tacitus · May 22, 2018

Keasar said:
To see a future generation where a little girl get the question "So who's your role model?" and this image pops up on the auditorium screen:

And in the back your hear a voice going "That's my girl~"

I wouldn't mind it.

Sister of battle with lightning coming from her eyes? BURN THE WITCH!

Nemesis Warlock · May 22, 2018

adj_noun said:
though necron players should get ready for their faction to get schooled by a bunch of tweens

ASSHOLETEP WILL HAVE NONE OF THIS.

Plasma · May 22, 2018

Good, kids should be learning from a young age about heretics.

OhSatan · May 22, 2018

Pilgrimzero said:
Just one of many examples of when "We need to show how awesome these guys are, let's have have wipe out some SoB!"

I'm still salty that the most poweful SOB ever created was jobbed to Ahriman in the old B/W comics.

Tacitus said:
Sister of battle with lightning coming from her eyes? BURN THE WITCH!

And I love that legit all the imperium turns their heads to the weird things the SOB can do.

Doukou · May 22, 2018

I mean I I understand appealing to kids but what is the goal. The miniatures are way out of the price range and most parents would probably rezearch why they are dropping 100 dollars on a miniatur, then decide not to after finding how mess up the universe is
Wait like 10 years when the kid hss enough disposable income.
Maybe it's part of a bigger initive.
IAtleast it will be a good tool for parents who want to get their kid into Warhammer.

The kids should have been in the one true greater good faction, The Tau!

Pilgrimzero · May 22, 2018

Muskieratboi said:
ASSHOLETEP WILL HAVE NONE OF THIS.

HA! I forgot about ASSHOLETEP! Best Necron.

Keasar · May 22, 2018

Tacitus said:
Sister of battle with lightning coming from her eyes? BURN THE WITCH!

Don't you diss Ephrael Stern!

Poppy · May 22, 2018

the only 40k faction i actually like is the tyranid because they are amoral and exist only to feed and grow and survive, afaik. also i respect the orkz

i enjoy chaos in theory because outright evil is fun, but once space marines etc. become involved in it i tune out

everyone else is like a maximum slider satire of some high school level negative concept

Wolven Hammer · May 22, 2018

Fucking badass.

Prolepro · May 22, 2018

The idea of children existing in the 40k universe is somehow less believable to me than eldritch chaotic sex gods.

TheCthultist · May 23, 2018

Warhammer 40K for Young Readers

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