Today, I've finally overcome my anxieties about driving and have acquired my license

[Choppasmith]

So, I'm 35. I've never been that crazy about driving even when taking Drivers Ed in High School. Partly due because my mom was struggling to support her four kids as a single parent so I figured having any sort of vehicular freedom was off the table.

When I left the nest and she moved to New Zealand, she left me her car so I can learn how to drive. I did okay, but I got distracted easily and almost hit someone. There was a hitch in the insurance so I was never able to take the actual driving test. I was moving to a small town, so I opted to sell the car and get around by bus and bicycle.

That near hit of a pedestrian always bugged me though. I mean it was easy to tell people that I just liked the greener/healthier alternative to transport, but the idea of hitting something or someone always bothered me in the long run.

I would have my permit and practiced on and off for the next decade or so, but I could never get excited about driving. It felt like such a chore. But as years went on, I thought I'm never going to meet anyone without a license. Co-workers and even people here were pushing for me to drive. I think I posted in an "Ask Women Questions" started by Morrigan in the old place which party much cemented that "Yeah, I really need my license..."

It wasn't until a year ago when I watched a little import on Netflix called "Canada's Worst Driver" that really inspired me to start driving. Seeing this show with people with problems worse than mine rally inspired me. I realized, I'm NOT as pathetic as I think I am. The show offered a bunch of great tips as well. Even after the show was taken off I scoured the web for other episodes and learned even more.

Meanwhile I got my permit and practiced and things were different this time, I was actually enjoying driving. After a while things just clicked. I failed the first two driving tests over really little things. The second time was really discouraging, but today was my third time and I had a really chill tester, but I passed.

So yeah sorry for the vent, or stealth brag, it's just so liberating to have finally overcome this mountain in my life.

 

[Bleu]

and in 4 to 5 weeks you will wonder how you could ever think of driving as a somewhat complicated thing (if you drive daily).
and then you will start to hate others humans for being so bad at driving (blinker for F* sake you idiots !!.1!)
all of this is normal.

 

[Davilmar]

I'm proud of you. Make the most of it, and explore the world! Or the place you live in, lol.

 

[Deleted member 56449]

Good job OP! Now enjoy it and I hope your place isn't crowded always

 

[Sal_S]

Hey congrats!
I got mine a few weeks ago and felt miserable and like failing going into it, but it went pretty nicely. I don't see myself driving much until I get my own car (and even then, I'm used to taking the bus), but passing the driving test lift a little weight off my shoulders.

 

[Cordy]

Congratulations!!

 

[Wok]

Congratulations!

I have yet to learn it when I get the time and the money. I am nowhere near owning a car, but it could be useful one day.
I am lucky to live in a place with good public transport these days.

 

[spindashing]

Congrats, man. Be safe out there.

 

[Gwenpoolshark]

Good work!

 

[Seductivpancakes]

Good for you OP.

 

[Maolfunction]

That's a huge accomplishment, congrats. I was also really nervous about driving when I first got my permit. Something about controlling a massive chunk of metal that can easily kill someone made me apprehensive about it.

But, after getting my license and starting to drive daily, it's obvious that you have a lot of control of what happens to you and your car and where it goes. I drive in a way that keeps the risk of being in a accident as low as I can make it while still driving safely by trying to account how badly other people drive lol. It's second nature now after driving for 15 years.

 

[TigerKnee]

Congrats and admire the fact that you overcame this at the age of 35 ;)

 

[oneils]

Congrats! Good for you. I am 41 and still have not bothered with learning how to drive. Its on a list of things that I want to eventually get to. Have other stuff I want to focus on, first, though.

 

[SweetVermouth]

When I started learning how to drive I couldn't even imagine being able to do it. Especially since I was learning on a manual transmission car. Then I learned way quicker than I thought I would and driving a car has become very easy and about 2 months after I got my license I already felt like a veteran.

 

[HeartlessNobody2134]

and in 4 to 5 weeks you will wonder how you could ever think of driving as a somewhat complicated thing (if you drive daily).
and then you will start to hate others humans for being so bad at driving (blinker for F* sake you idiots !!.1!)
all of this is normal.

Click to shrink...

Best way to put it. From lack of turn signals to tailgaters on your ass and everything in between, it can be really frustrating driving most of the time.

 

[oledome]

brag away, good work!

 

[Morrigan]

I think I posted in an "Ask Women Questions" started by @Morrigan in the old place

Click to shrink...

?? Wasn't me

 

[sappyday]

I was in the same boat. I'm only 24 but i got my license in December after always being scared to drive.

Funny enough that fear is entirely gone and just two weeks ago I was almost in a deadly accident.

 

[Deleted member 8852]

Congratulations!

I'm 32 now and have had my license for just over a year now, so I can relate. Was quite anxious during driving lessons as well, but now that I have my license and car things feel super natural. As long as it's not rush hour I actually look forward to driving, put on spotify and enjoy some alone time.

 

[_Karooo]

Congrats and drive safely fren!

 

[Melhadf]

and in 4 to 5 weeks you will wonder how you could ever think of driving as a somewhat complicated thing (if you drive daily).
and then you will start to hate others humans for being so bad at driving (blinker for F* sake you idiots !!.1!)
all of this is normal.

Click to shrink...

"The pedal on the bloody right...the right. Oh for f...."

Seriously though, congrats and welcome to the world of never looking at your phone for hours... It's freeing

 

[fontguy]

Fuck yeah.

 

[Carn]

congrats! ive had my license for a few years now but I hardly ever drive. not owning a car does that. I moved to a new city a few months back and I'm actually considering to get a bunch of lessons to just get back into it a bit.

 

[super-famicom]

Congrats! Drive safe and please use your turn signals.

 

[Hayvic]

Drivers who don't have anxiety about hitting someone are the worst drivers.

 

[DJtal]

Congrats man! I started driving around your age too. I perfectly know the feeling.
Long story short I had my license when I was 18 but I was never confident to really drive. So I bought a car and have friends drive me around.
I went through that phase, got married and my wife took over the driving me around. Til the day she was sick and I really needed to be able to drive her around. So I took the car with a heartbeat off the roof to practice in real traffic, man I have never been yelled at like that before.
I decided to ignore and continue to build my confidence.

In my country the majority of cars are manual, so that was my major problem, getting comfortable shifting gears. In 3 days of hard practice, I was confident to have my wife as a passenger. I never saw her so proud of me before (my PhD was peanuts compares to me driving haha). She thought I will just call a cab or call a friend. After a few weeks, I got less and less anxious and learning more about how to adapt my driving on different situation.

It's when I realized the burden I was to my friends and wife. And the freedom I was missing out. Now I wake up, and I can drive everywhere I want.
I drive manual, automatic, left wheel, right wheel (trust me that's another challenge, but easily manageable).

Congrats again ! :)

 

[Lunchbox]

Congrats OP!

 

[Dan]

Congrats OP. Hopefully you will enjoy driving when you can - it has it's moments. Also, enjoy your new movements freedoms :)

 

[Eldy]

Congratulations! Glad you were able to get through the whole process, and that you had a chill tester this time around. :)

 

[RatskyWatsky]

I'm 28 and don't have a license despite living in a small town where it's basically a requirement to do anything. Like you, I've driven a bit but find it super stressful and I'm constantly afraid of crashing into someone. Turning in particular is really hard for me for some reason. Your story is inspiring though, so maybe I'll give it another shot...

 

[Riversands]

Im not sure how come driving is difficult. It is very easy. I had already been capable to do it in senior high school, i was 16 at that time. Some even 15

 

[Fat4all]

While I've never had issues with driving myself i can understand the stress and fear that can come from driving.

There's a lot of dangers that come with it, but driving can also be very rewarding and calming in a certain mindset, especially when you can drive to places for a break away from work.

 

[Donos]

Congrats. Now book a flight to Germany and rent a VW Golf GTI or something like that and enjoy the Autobahn. Or drive mountain roads/serpentines.

 

[Kiru]

Congrats, I got mine this year with 27. :)

 

[Deleted member 1478]

Congrats.

I'm 34 and in a very similar situation. I was supposed to start learning around my 18th birthday but not long before that I was in a tiny crash with a friend. Nothing major but enough to shake me up in cars since then. I'm not nearly as bad as I was but I would get very paranoid as a passenger (got it again last night actually on the way to the cinema).

It's something I hope to work past soon and start learning but as you know, it takes some work.

 

[butzopower]

32, still no idea how to drive, and no uh... drive... to learn how to.

Strangely I feel like I've met more people who don't know how to drive the last few years than I did when I was younger. Maybe it's due to living in a bigger city, or anxious people just tend to meet more anxious people.

 

[Deleted member 37928]

I'm 33 now and I'm so scared of driving that I haven't been able to get my drivers license. It's really bothering me because there's so many situations in my life where I could've used a car.

Did it take long before you started to feel comfortable in the car? I feel like I need some words of encouragement, and maybe some hard truths.

 

[thezboson]

Congrats!

I am 39 and I just started to work on getting my drivers license. Growing up we were poor and there was never enough money. I had to sell my Playstation to even move to go to university. I also live in a city where going by bus is both cheap and very comfortable. Probably going to keep taking the bus, even when I have my drivers license (but I am temped to get a nice environmentally friendly car to be honest).

I'm 33 now and I'm so scared of driving that I haven't been able to get my drivers license. It's really bothering me because there's so many situations in my life where I could've used a car.

Did it take long before you started to feel comfortable in the car? I feel like I need some words of encouragement, and maybe some hard truths.

Click to shrink...

I have been driving for 1-2 hours every day for two weeks (with a teacher). The first 20 minutes were uncomfortable, and every new situation was nervous. But on day three I started feeling way more comfortable and now that I have done the high speed lessons it has started to become quite enjoyable.

The first lesson took place on an open street with almost no traffic, that helped making me less nervous. If it gets really bad you might want to try cognitive behavioral therapy to help you get over the worst hurdle.

 

[Deleted member 37928]

Congrats!

I am 39 and I just started to work on getting my drivers license. Growing up we were poor and there was never enough money. I had to sell my Playstation to even move to go to university. I also live in a city where going by bus is both cheap and very comfortable. Probably going to keep taking the bus, even when I have my drivers license (but I am temped to get a nice environmentally friendly car to be honest).


I have been driving for 1-2 hours every day for two weeks (with a teacher). The first 20 minutes were uncomfortable, and every new situation was nervous. But on day three I started feeling way more comfortable and now that I have done the high speed lessons it has started to become quite enjoyable.

The first lesson took place on an open street with almost no traffic, that helped making me less nervous. If it gets really bad you might want to try cognitive behavioral therapy to help you get over the worst hurdle.

Click to shrink...

Thanks for the encouragement. I've actually went through some therapy recently and it has pushed me towards taking the license now. I've gained a lot more insight and confidence. But taking those first steps is always a challenge. Hopefully I will get comfortable sooner rather than later. :)

 

[Untzillatx]

Congratulations, but don't stop now. I got my license at 18 and have barely driven since (I'm 26), so I still get quite anxious when I have to.

Luckily I live in a city with superb public transportation.

 

[thezboson]

Thanks for the encouragement. I've actually went through some therapy recently and it has pushed me towards taking the license now. I've gained a lot more insight and confidence. But taking those first steps is always a challenge. Hopefully I will get comfortable sooner rather than later. :)

Click to shrink...

That's great!
Yeah, the first steps are scary. I remember being worried that I would be the oldest at my driving school or that I would meet one of my students there. I wasn't the oldest one, but I did meet some former students. xD

Anyway, hope you get comfortable quickly, good luck!

 

[DevilNeverCry]

Congrats! I got my license almost 2 years ago at 19. Initially confidence was a big issue but i soon realised that its the key to driving, being sure in your actions and not second guessing or delaying will help you avoid accidents and help reduce stressing others on the road. Overconfidence and aggressive driving is what causes the majority of issues on the road. Not having a car is common in the UK, especially when young or when living in big cities. Insurance prices are an absolute joke so its not a luxury everyone can afford.

 

[Minky]

Big grats, well done on overcoming those fears!! I'm 27 and starting lessons again in a few weeks... Failed my test back when I was 19, was never massively confident on the road anyways but that was a big hit that stopped me trying again. Dawned on me recently that I'll probably need driving ability if I'm to be flexible enough for new work opportunities in the future, as well as other life shit... So I put down a deposit on an EV and I'm gonna see if driving an automatic will be any easier! I hope I can manage as well as you did. :)

 

[The Albatross]

Congrats!

 

[Jeronimo]

Congrats. I couldn't be where I am today if I didn't learn to drive. It was an expected/common thing where I'm from but if I didn't learn I never would have been able to leave home for college, move out of state for more school, buy the house we bought, get the job I have, or commute to work because of lack of good public transportation.

 

[Deleted member 6582]

I got mine last month, but even though I passed I have about 5 hours in the last 10 years driving so I don't feel confident. Now I need to get a car which is hard when you don't have a car and insurance...

 

[Redowl]

I live in NYC and don't have to drive but I want to be able to enjoy driving. I'm jealous of people who sing in their cars and drive effortlessly with their elbows leaning out the window. I am a bundle of nerves every time. I have a huge irrational fear of making a mistake and wrecking the car. Compounding that fear is the fact that it's not my car (zip car) so I will be in super debt if I wreck it. I'm glad you were able to conquer that fear and hope I will be able too as well. I am 39 and got my license in my early twenties.

 

[Strider_Blaze]

Great to hear! Was personally anxious about driving myself, but once you get the hang of things all should be good.

Got mine at 21; currently 28 now.

 

[Tora]

Nice, yeah it's different for everyone. Funny how we're all expected to drive haha, some people can blitz it within 10 lessons, others 100.

You got there in the end, all that matters!

 

[Xiao Hu]

I admire you. Personally, I don't see myself overcoming my anxiety with vehicles in the near future. Thankfully, I also don't plan to live in areas without public transport either.