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There's a homeless woman living outside my apartment. She seems harmless, but is a causing a nuisance. What to do?
- Thread starter ToddBonzalez
- Start date
I'd recommend calling a homeless shelter and asking for resources (food banks, where she can shower, temp shelters to sleep in, etc). I'd also ask if they know of any trained professionals that can come speak with her to help.
The key thing is not to instigate a negative relationship, as sometimes homeless people can suffer from mental illness or other cognitive impairments or conditions. Basically, you don't want to escalate to the point where you "need" to call the police.
OP
OP
The most aggressive she gets is that she sometimes follows me from my car to the front gate of the building and asks for me to let her in/ asks which apt I live in, etc. I usually just say "I can't let you in, sorry." and quickly enter. It's a bit annoying/uncomfortable, but I never feel unsafe, so def not worth risking what the cops might do.
A group of homeless people live outside my friend's apartment. They just drink and crack jokes. My friend buys them food and chats to them sometimes. Be like my friend.
Yeah. I think it would be nice to give her care packages every so often, but I definitely don't think he should be inviting her into his apartment at all, let alone for a shower.
OP
OP
Sure, but it seems like whatever food was left outside definitely drew them in. There were a bunch of rats that seemed to have set up shop in our parking alcove due to whatever was in these boxes. I hadn't seen anything else like that since living there.
As others have said don't call the police. If you're feeling generous buy her a hotel room for a night along with a giftcard for a meal.
Ignore her as best you can.
Do not call the cops unless there is immediate physical danger.
Lot of folks ITT offering advice like give her a meal, offer your shower (!!!,) but the fact is most homeless people are suffering from serious mental illness. The fixes aren't quick, and unless you are ready to take on the significant responsibility of caring for troubled person, steer clear. You can give her money, but it will never be enough.
Do not call the cops unless there is immediate physical danger.
Lot of folks ITT offering advice like give her a meal, offer your shower (!!!,) but the fact is most homeless people are suffering from serious mental illness. The fixes aren't quick, and unless you are ready to take on the significant responsibility of caring for troubled person, steer clear. You can give her money, but it will never be enough.
Do not invite into your home.
I would ignore this person and let the management know if she's being too disruptive.
I would ignore this person and let the management know if she's being too disruptive.
Jesus some bad advice in here.
I would not advise you invite a complete stranger into your home, no
I would not advise you invite a complete stranger into your home, no
You hadn't seen them because they hide. they are rats.
Friendship is fuckin magic huh? Corny ass
You wouldn't invite a homeless stranger that might be suffering from mental illnesses to your home for food and a nice bath?
Wowow 🤔
😂
If that video you're referring to is another thread on here i'm 99% certain the guy was waving around a gun at the officers and cars passing by prior to getting shot.
Anyways, i'd either call management to handle or some form of social services if they're for sure staying around the area. Could talk to them yourself if you're feeling up to it but I'd probably leave them be unless they were causing problems.
Yeah I don't know if it's some kind of guilt complex or just online posturing, but don't invite people you don't know in. Be nice and find resources for them if you think there is a real problem.
Best bet is to call a homeless shelter, let them know about her situation, and ultimately involve yourself as little as possible.
As noted do not call the cops or management (since management will just call the cops). It sucks because that's one of the myriad responsibilities that the police should be trusted with but we know what's going to happen if they get involved.
As noted do not call the cops or management (since management will just call the cops). It sucks because that's one of the myriad responsibilities that the police should be trusted with but we know what's going to happen if they get involved.
Please don't call the cops. I understand this may seem counter-productive, but there are enough stories of this very sort of thing going horribly wrong without you inadvertently adding to the tally, and I'm sure you don't need reminding that the current climate doesn't exactly bode well for anybody involved in "low-priority" cases like this.
Mocking someone for one bad piece of advice while suggesting another (calling the police) is interesting.
The real answer continues to be to call an actual outreach team if they need help.
100% feel good posturing. We have it plastered all over entryways in my area that if you let someone you don't know in the building you'll be evicted. I sure as hell won't let someone I just met up in my pad, and letting them wander around the building would get me booted.
Find decent hearted people in your complex and see if yall can put your heads(and maybd a little disposable income) together to find a way to lend her a hand if possible.
Please don't call the cops right off the bat. If worst comes to worst call the super I guess.
Please don't call the cops right off the bat. If worst comes to worst call the super I guess.
This is important. Management will just call the cops.
Call your local shelter for outreach so they can handle it.
Yea, it's weird.
Homeless or not, I'm not letting a complete stranger into my house.
Then you have a bright future in the quantum computing field ahead of you OP. Just don't try anything dumb on your first day of new job.
(as others suggested - call a homeless shelter)
And for God's sake don't let her in your home. Would you let any random stranger in your home? If not, then you shouldn't let her in your home. You don't have to invite yourself into a potentially-unsafe situation just to be empathetic to someone else.
Call a homeless shelter/outreach program. They're the closest thing to professionals here, they'll be able to handle this better than you can.
Call a homeless shelter/outreach program. They're the closest thing to professionals here, they'll be able to handle this better than you can.
Whatever you choose just please, please, please do not listen to advice such as "invite into your home". You never just invite random strangers into your home like that, especially when a good portion of the homeless population have mental issues. You don't know who exactly it is you're bringing inside. If you have children then that decision is even more wreck less.
Honestly I don't know if I would offer money or food either unless it could be done in a way where they wouldn't know where your home is because it could lead to them just spending time outside your home waiting for more.
I agree with those saying to look into outreach programs. They can help her much more than you can. They can not just give her food but also shelter.
Honestly I don't know if I would offer money or food either unless it could be done in a way where they wouldn't know where your home is because it could lead to them just spending time outside your home waiting for more.
I agree with those saying to look into outreach programs. They can help her much more than you can. They can not just give her food but also shelter.
Don't do this please
OP just keep your head down and go on with your day.
I heard that one can summon rats simply by reading aloud from the Vim manual. I'm too afraid to try it.
Ignore the peanut gallery in here telling you to let her in your house, that's a recipe for disaster. She'll either trash the place, lock herself in the bathroom, steal your things, refuse to leave, or will try to enter again later with her friends when you're not there and then tell the cops "he let me in last time!"
Don't give her anything either, because then she'll never leave your complex and will seek you out daily and harass you if you got nothing for her that day. Also, don't call the cops because she'll probably get tazed or murdered.
Inform your building management, and try your best to ignore her. Eventually she'll be relocated or sheltered.
Don't give her anything either, because then she'll never leave your complex and will seek you out daily and harass you if you got nothing for her that day. Also, don't call the cops because she'll probably get tazed or murdered.
Inform your building management, and try your best to ignore her. Eventually she'll be relocated or sheltered.
Lol all the " I wouldn't invite a stranger into my home " ppl must have never did online dating. Op has communicated with the homeless lady quite a few times. I think that's comparable to a tinder convo lol. Millions n millions of ppl meet up at strangers houses n vice versa every night. Especially in fuckin LA where op lives lol.
"That's not fair. She might have a mental illness!!"
Yes so might every single person on tinder but if they are Sexy enough ppl risk it. Wonder what's different here 🤔.
just say " I wouldn't invite a homeless person inside" n cut the bullshit 🙄🙄🙄🙄
Just continue living ya life op. It's just rats which LA has a fucking lot of. They are always there. You just don't see them.
"That's not fair. She might have a mental illness!!"
Yes so might every single person on tinder but if they are Sexy enough ppl risk it. Wonder what's different here 🤔.
just say " I wouldn't invite a homeless person inside" n cut the bullshit 🙄🙄🙄🙄
Just continue living ya life op. It's just rats which LA has a fucking lot of. They are always there. You just don't see them.
Or maybe not everyone is viewing this with the same lens as you and don't consider Tinder dating and invited homeless people into your home as the same exact scenario.
Or some of us speak as parents. I know for sure I don't invite random strangers into my home with my family here. Why would I do something like that?
I don't know you. I wouldn't just invite you in my home either.
Do not invite random people into your building, that's nuts and how people wind up dead.
Call some shelters to see if they do outreach. It's probably the safest thing for her and for yourself. I wouldn't engage with her either if she's made you uncomfortable before asking where you live and whatnot.
Call some shelters to see if they do outreach. It's probably the safest thing for her and for yourself. I wouldn't engage with her either if she's made you uncomfortable before asking where you live and whatnot.
Equating people on tinder with homeless people on the street
Galaxy Brain.jpeg
Clearly haven't read other responses in this thread. Plenty of other options to get her help other than cops/building management who will most likely call the cops. I think it's pretty obviously cops should be the last resort to solve anything that isn't violent in nature.
This is probably the most sound advice in the thread. But please do not call the cops or your property management company
Okay I will be more practically helpful...
It doesn't take much. It's scary at first. People are just people. You are just trying to help. Respect the person's boundaries. Just do a little.
You can drop off food & water when they are sleeping, anonymously, to begin.
What difference is there that makes it any safer for someone to invite strangers from tinder into their home than inviting a homeless person?
"Relocated" what a nice word for being forcibly detained and dropped off in the hills somewhere, not getting roughed around if you're lucky. I'm sure grateful that I can't be picked up and dropped off somewhere totally random purely on the basis that I have enough money to reside somewhere. Must suck!
don't call management. Seriously how are some of you still this addicted to the taste of boot. Call one of the dozen support groups linked in the thread
I wouldn't invite anyone into the house right now. We're in the middle of a full blown pandemic.
Don't talk to her
Don't give her money, food, water, etc
Don't invite her in
Don't call the cops unless she actively threatens violence against you or someone else in your apartment area
As others have said, contact an outreach shelter and let them handle it
Don't give her money, food, water, etc
Don't invite her in
Don't call the cops unless she actively threatens violence against you or someone else in your apartment area
As others have said, contact an outreach shelter and let them handle it