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The number of adults without sex in the prior year is disproportionately increasing among young men
- Thread starter mutantmagnet
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Look man I don't think anyone denys that some type of men (short or whatever flimsy preferences are 'in') have trouble in casual hook up apps. But like... That's the point of those apps, to find some meaningless sex and if you're average looking or short or whatever then of course you ain't gonna get many. Most people are vapid and surface level on these hook up apps, even women.
You'll have to put in extra effort to get noticed which means making more interesting bios and taking better pics and shit. (And yeah I do see short dudes with God awful bios too which probably reinforces that mentality)
Also doesn't mean you can't get any from dating IRL. In fact I think online hook ups makes it easier to meet and get to know people IRL and date. I mean it certainly takes longer to get to the sex part lol.
And personally I think people have better luck using non social media dating. But that's just me.
The person you are looking for is a clothier. Ask around or check Yelp to find a good one. They will take all your measurements and have big books of fabric samples and shirt designs. At that point you spend half an hour feeling fabric, going "ooh that's nice, I like that color, I want one in that". You can decide pockets, collars, sleeves, monogramming. All the good stuff.
Once you've gotten to your budget they'll take your requests, send it out to a tailoring factory who will print out your pattern, and then cut and sew your clothes. Six weeks later or so your clothier will call you to let you know they're in. You'll come back to their office, try on the shirts, and if anything is out of whack they'll send them to a local tailor for minor alterations. If they're all good you take them home.
You can find internet firms that will do custom shirts based on you measuring at home but a clothier will make sure it fits perfectly. Plus when your clothes come up in conversation you can be all "Yeah my shirt guy is really good. What? You don't have a shirt guy? You need a shirt guy. Here's my guy. He'll make you look a million bucks."
Between this and that Tinder height verification thread there's this subcurrent of feminist schadenfraude around here that's kind of icky.
"Man, height verification is basically body shaming so that would suck."
"Yeah well women have been objectified forever sooooo...."
"There's a sharp drop sexual activity, especially for men. That could be problematic."
"Step your game up, mediocre oppressor!"
"Man, height verification is basically body shaming so that would suck."
"Yeah well women have been objectified forever sooooo...."
"There's a sharp drop sexual activity, especially for men. That could be problematic."
"Step your game up, mediocre oppressor!"
"Always broke"
He got a whale to give him 12k at Christmas, his "brokeness" is just dumb self inflicted money mismanagement and him genuinely thinking that he "deserves" to be debt free. Dude has two houses.
As a guy that is single and is his mid 30s, I can't complain as I'm doing just fine in that department. It seems alot of women in their early to mid 20s have no problem dating me and prefer the fact I'm older and have my shit together.
I also exercise somewhat regularly and stopped dressing like a slob in my early 20s which completely changed the game for me. I have a feeling couch potato living is fucking these poor younger guys up and holding them back. Sure I'll game it up for hours at a time but I try to keep it balanced with activities and such.
I also exercise somewhat regularly and stopped dressing like a slob in my early 20s which completely changed the game for me. I have a feeling couch potato living is fucking these poor younger guys up and holding them back. Sure I'll game it up for hours at a time but I try to keep it balanced with activities and such.
People have to remember that sexlessness doesn't only affect the basement dwellers, but also the extremely beautiful.
They apparently get fewer dates.
But 1 in 5 though? It's a trend that is affecting both men and women and I don't think it's because people are getting collectively shittier.
They apparently get fewer dates.
But 1 in 5 though? It's a trend that is affecting both men and women and I don't think it's because people are getting collectively shittier.
If he's confident and has found someone who likes that, that's fine.
But for most nerds struggling for sex, going for that look isn't going to increase their opportunity window.
That's just not going to get you laid often.
Or if your beard is really patchy and looks like someone has randomly stuck lint on your face, just shave it.
I was rocking this for a while (when I had my long hair) a few years ago. But man it is can be excruciatingly difficult to maintain a shapely beard and worse still if one suffers from dandruff related issue. In the end, my job told me "No
While it lasted, it was fun listening to people who didn't know that brown folks could also have reddish beard. Now that my I trim my hair to shortest length possible, perhaps I will pursue this again to look like a (smol) biker. Of course, I'd be immediately unemployed :(
Yeah I get you. From my perspective, a lot of socializing can come off as so fake. There's all these rituals and rules, it often feels like posturing. Not to mention the headache of actually navigating the actual meat of the conversation. But you understand your current friend status. Just gotta put in the grinding to get the results lol. FWIW, I have a friend who's in a similar spot and I wish he had as much of a grasp on the situation as you. He's still preferring to ignore the situation and we're not sure how to help him. :(
Congrats on your progress though, sincerely! Shit ain't easy.
Look at the post above mine, and all the Incel jokes in this thread.
Reminds me of the the article where female Trump supporters were not getting dates after disclosing that political fact.
A lot of people don't really understand what feminism is, huh. People are joking when they say things and doesn't represent what feminism actually is.
Depression and anxiety are on the rise in all youth/young-adults. As much as medical intervention may be necessary to sort that out, for all the reasons that could be causing it, self-respect, self-worth and putting in effort to focus on yourself are still key.
As I said, look at how much anger and rage gets broadcasted daily now due to social media usage rising. There's always been angsty teens and raging against the machine, but now many are living in a perpetual state of anger and rage at the word, and in relation to this topic, anger and rage at the opposite sex (or even same sex if you're gay/bi).
While there can be legitimate issues to focus on with the sexes, if you make yourself an almost permanently bitter and angry person (on top of being jealous and envious), you will push away most people. In fact, nearly all people. It's not fun or pleasant to be around and anger and rage can be quite toxic emotions if they aren't used with precision and meaning. Just lashing out at everyone and everything is too much for most people to want to wade through, no matter how good looking you might be.
Yeah, dry skin through a beard is killer. I can grow a decent full beard, but I have sensitive skin that needs looked after or it can become quite dry and itchy.
But then I also get bad shave rash, so it's a bitch all round. Still, less complaining, more finding ways to deal with things.
Yeah I was gonna post this too. Goes with my earlier post. Political polarization is one of the biggest factors that lines up with the timeline and could be pretty reasonable reason why there's a massive spike rather than a gradual change.
OOOoOooof fuck that. As someone who can empathize on having sensitive skin, I essentially gave up shaving except for special occasions since a few years ago. I simply trim to the shortest length possible.
I am 26 and my last relationship was 6 years ago.. tbh i feel zero drive or motivation to seek one out. I am doing pretty good for myself, have a nice job and a nice apartment, so i am really content with the way things are going right now for me. the only annoying thing about this is my parents with their constant : have you found a gf yet? i don't give a shit!
seriously, entertaining another human being is just not worth the effort with the rise of electronic entertainment possibilities. everytime i jerk one out i just shudder at the thought of having someone else around me afterwards
seriously, entertaining another human being is just not worth the effort with the rise of electronic entertainment possibilities. everytime i jerk one out i just shudder at the thought of having someone else around me afterwards
This. I also want to rebut that this is a game of their own making. The problem isn't that they CAN'T get sex. The problem is that they cant get sex with 10/10 babes. I'm an average woman. I'm a nerd (duh I'm on this board.), I practice skin care but don't do makeup. My experience growing up was only getting hit on as a bullying tactic because I'm considered an 'uggo'. Plenty of dudes would proclaim I'm dating someone to get 'Ew!' Response because I'm not a walking Kardashian. I'm lucky that I was self confident enough to bear through it. However all those Insta models were/are women and girls like me who faced utter ridicule and humiliation from the very guys crying about fucking tinder being a Chad's and Stacy's fest and stepped up their game meet their unrealistic expectations.
Quit bullshitting there is a 50/50 chance your loner ass had the heart of a decent amount of when but you didn't give them the time of day because they don't look like Jane from Spiderman.
From media, to character designs, to looks- men always set the standards for us at the Heavens Gate and lo and behold the moment women demand standards that are 3 inches off the ground its 'Tindrs' fault.
I'm pretty sure most of the incel talk is joking but I get why people are touchy about this subject. That's not to say that incels aren't scum of the earth though
Reasons I think this is largely growing:
Dating apps concentrating choice
Social media deteriorating traditional social skills ironically
Porn
Inability to move out largely due to cost / shared living spaces
More divisive attitudes and expectations when it comes to worldviews (this one ain't hard to figure out)
Internet allows for more loneliness vortexes
That being said... In my experience I see the trend start reversing when dudes are in their early thirties (concurrently, this is when most of them start taking care of themselves and have better independence related skills and traits)
Reasons I think this is largely growing:
Dating apps concentrating choice
Social media deteriorating traditional social skills ironically
Porn
Inability to move out largely due to cost / shared living spaces
More divisive attitudes and expectations when it comes to worldviews (this one ain't hard to figure out)
Internet allows for more loneliness vortexes
That being said... In my experience I see the trend start reversing when dudes are in their early thirties (concurrently, this is when most of them start taking care of themselves and have better independence related skills and traits)
Yeah I think this is just a perfect storm of tons of issues—political polarization, hookup apps and social media, tougher economic situations for young people, and increasing gender disparities in terms of economics and education.
I use an electric shaver most of the time. It's quite decent and is smooth when leaving the house.
I've tried to master safety razor shaving but because my skin is soo sensitive AND dry, it usually just ends badly.
This is so damn true, found this out for myself 10 years ago. Step up your game young guys and stop throwing a pity party that it's everything except you that's causing to to not be getting sex.
OP
OP
Well actually! It's Mary Jane and Spider-Man with a hyphen, perhaps if you got your references right you would have been seen as more attractive.
/s obviously
Thanks for the sentiment but to be clear it's nothing I'm depressed about. I'm depressed about plenty but companionship isnt one of those things.
I've got plenty of friends both Male and female. Just never been really interested in actual romantic relationships. I'm someone who really tends to need their space and solitude. And that's just kind of largely incompatible with tending to a partners needs.
I'll be interested to see if the numbers keep going up and up as the years pass. I certainly can't put my finger on one reason why this is happening but I'm not that suprised. I guess there's nothing wrong with this theoretically but with how society puts sex on a pedestal it is sure to cause issues down the line imo
Since when do you need money for dating when you're young? I mean I was meeting women with less than 5 bucks in my pocket when I was around 18 to 20. Just bought a few beer and went to the park.
User banned (1 day): trolling
Sorry to the folks not having sex. My wife and I had some mind blowing, hip numbing, stinky, sweaty, neighbours call the cops type sex last night.
Glad I put down the fucking controller, stop giving a shit about my post count and stopped feeling sorry for myself years ago.
Glad I put down the fucking controller, stop giving a shit about my post count and stopped feeling sorry for myself years ago.
Depression and anxiety and general "disconnection" are a huge part of this, no doubt.
I feel for the people going through this kind of thing, and do my best to spend time in places like reddit helping young men shift their attitudes away from bad conclusions and towards self-improvement and open connection with people and all that. But there's only so much you can do, and there does seem to be some systemic shifts, especially with internet-savvy young men, where radicalization and other influences are making them... let's say "unappealing" to many women.
I feel for the people going through this kind of thing, and do my best to spend time in places like reddit helping young men shift their attitudes away from bad conclusions and towards self-improvement and open connection with people and all that. But there's only so much you can do, and there does seem to be some systemic shifts, especially with internet-savvy young men, where radicalization and other influences are making them... let's say "unappealing" to many women.
Congrats on the sex.
So whats there to do for those who aren't blaming women/feminism but realize the problem is themselves, but don't have the motivation to improve? Whenever I say I'm not looking for a relationship I've had people react with surprise. Like as if its so odd?
Never used electric shaver tbh. That said I have heard that it does no favours for folks with dry skin. However, it is good to know that it has worked for you.
And talking of dry skin- have you or do you use moisturizer? It helped me to great effect. Furthermore, an unconventional remedy that also did wonders for was high quality beard oil- took a few drops and applied on clean shaved skin.
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