The mental health of this community [Read Staff Post Before Posting]

[TheGhost]

I've noticed the Spike and I was wondering why when we have an excellent mental health community it's not being posted about in there? Where there are people more than capable of being able to help out? Is it because of discord and people don't post in there as much as they would have 5-6 years ago.

With the problems community groups have on here (with the general off topic forum we are posting on now) I feel like there has to be some sort of game plan to help these individuals.

People are going to read this and laugh in my face, and I don't know who would want to do this for free. But this forum needs counselors. Mods are not counselors, that's not a knock against them but it's unreasonable to put that role onto what they already do. Maybe there could be some volunteers? Idk? It would need a intense screening process because I'm sure there are probaby some sick fucks on this forum tucked away in a corner somewhere that would enable people to actually take their life.

But if you take a even further step back. This forum wasn't built to evolve and support this level of mental health support. It was built as a safe place for people to post. So yeah I don't know the answers just have suggestions.

Edit: I do think seperating news from entertainment would go a long way. My anxiety and panic levels has gone through the roof being on this site because you're constantly surrounded by negative world news. You notice it with people thinking we are going to enter WW3 or just straight up panic. That's when you have to log off for a bit and go outside and see life is still ok.

 

[Lentic]

I think the ideal split would be a News/Entertainment section and a Casual Talk forum.
"Politics" would obviously still be allowed anywhere, but the idea would be to give quieter conversations their own place. As of now, all of the loud conversation and sensationalism seems to make its way to the front page. That's just the nature of the internet I guess, but it can be mitigated.

Personally, there are many times when I don't want to read about the latest news or entertainment and would rather just listen to people talk about miscellaneous topics. Being plugged into PR and marketing so often can't be good for your mental health.

 

[RedMercury]

I've noticed the Spike and I was wondering why when we have an excellent mental health community it's not being posted about in there? Where there are people more than capable of being able to help out? Is it because of discord and people don't post in there as much as they would have 5-6 years ago.

Click to shrink...

A bunch of people have mentioned it, it's even in the staff post

 

[Rotobit]

A pinned thread with resources is better than pinning the mental health OT itself, IMO. I can't imagine many people would feel comfortable with airing their problems on a platform that will be seen 24/7 front-and-center at the top of a forum page. Could always link to it as part of the resource links, though.

 

[Jimnymebob]

Edit: I do think seperating news from entertainment would go a long way. My anxiety and panic levels has gone through the roof being on this site because you're constantly surrounded by negative world news. You notice it with people thinking we are going to enter WW3 or just straight up panic. That's when you have to log off for a bit and go outside and see life is still ok.

Click to shrink...

I absolutely agree with this, and while I'm not advocating whatever website did the whole "you can't talk politically about video games" thing (was it Escapist?), I feel like both gaming and etcetera need a third subforum where people can just have an experience free from all the doom and gloom of the constant WW3 is happening right now, Trump did another stupid thing, Twitch steamer attacked their cat, developer refuses to include playable women characters threads that are constantly on the front page.

Like, I know a lot of video games are political, but sometimes I just want to talk about how impressive it was to be able to slip on seagull poop on MGS2, without getting into a big debate over the political elements of its story.

Ideally I'd say it should be split into:
Gaming news, reviews, and rumours.
Gaming Hangouts
General gaming (for other threads, like LTTP, Games you remember, what KH game had the silliest plot etc.)

News and politics
Etc Hangouts
General discussion (poop threads, my leg is on the other side of the road: should I see a doctor?, which is your favourite type of Haribo etc.)

 

[RedMercury]

I absolutely agree with this, and while I'm not advocating whatever website did the whole "you can't talk politically about video games" thing (was it Escapist?), I feel like both gaming and etcetera need a third subforum where people can just have an experience free from all the doom and gloom of the constant WW3 is happening right now, Trump did another stupid thing, Twitch steamer attacked their cat, developer refuses to include playable women characters threads that are constantly on the front page.

Click to shrink...

They tried that and the majority of people disliked it. Those threads are also often on the front page because they generate a lot of views and discussion, separating them would just further bifurcate the userbase.

 

[Relix]

I am all in for a Gaming, News and Politics, and Etcetera forum. The community needs it.

 

[Kittens McMittens]

I've seen threads where people directly cite the the "state of the world", "climate change", "fascism" as a direct cause of their hopelessness and driving force to why they feel suicidal. The entire OT is a pool of hopelessness and nihilistic feedback loops. I'm not claiming ERA is causing people to become suicidal, I'm saying that it's a factor that can drive people deeper into depression or the feeling of hopelessness due to how they view the media they consume on ERA to be "informed".

As for asking if I've personally dealt with mental illness... that's kinda a ridiculous thing to ask someone to be honest, especially in the context that you misunderstood my post. If you don't think my criticisms of leaving these threads open are valid, that's fine, but they can stand on their own without me having to give a deep dive into my history with mental illness as some type of justification for my views on the subject.

I'm not taking it personally, but I think you misunderstood my post on multiple levels.

But I think the community needs to start asking why these threads are popping up more often and if the community itself has responsibility for the current uptick in these threads, as well as moderation asking themselves if their actions in keeping them open are actually helping.

Click to shrink...

Thanks for your response. The reason why I asked is because this is a case where someone who has direct experience of ideation is likely to have a different capacity to understand than someone without, which obviously conditions the kind of discussion that is possible. I'm going to assume the answer is 'yes' (I wasn't looking for anything deeper than that!).

With the matter of why these threads happen here, I don't think it's related to Era as such. I've noticed in general that left leaning spaces tend to have higher prevalence or presentation of people with mental health problems. I think the reason for that is a confluence of factors - first, it's considered more acceptable to be open about such issues in left spaces. Secondly, poverty and economic disadvantage is a big driver of alienation and isolation that contributes to mental health issues such as anxiety and depression. In my experience, it's very common for people to reason that many of the problems facing them are structural, and fundamentally relate to the political economy of our society. As such, they come to left leaning conclusions.

Obviously I'm not claiming mental health is completely economically determined, just that it is a big determinant.

That leaves the question as to whether this forum is toxic for people with mental health issues. I don't think it is. I remember about 20 years ago when pro-ana forums started emerging. I know someone who used to frequent those spaces, and obviously it had a massive negative impact on her (already existing) eating disorder. That's the kind of environment we have to be careful to avoid. It's very important that we don't allow a culture that encourages the further development of any pathology. This is something that occurs in some spaces, where individuals with depression encourage each other and exchange methods. However, I see no evidence that is occurring here on Era.

I appreciate your experience has led you to feel that the best approach is to shut down anyone who posts while in ideation. However, I'm sure you can acknowledge the breadth of experience on this matter. Look at it this way: if someone is threatening to jump is it best to just wait for the emergency services to arrive or is it worth speaking to them, just one human to another?

So, that's why I feel it's wrong to blanket lock anyone who is in crisis. Obviously if a thread becomes toxic mods need to step in. To be honest though, I think most forums have that policy just so they can avoid any liability in case the worst happens. Really though, it's not the fault of anyone here if a poster in crisis makes a tragic choice. The best anyone can do is such people some attention and encouragement, and hope they have the means and the courage to seek help.

Note that none of this precludes a change in policy or approach to better manage these kinds of threads.

 

[B-Dubs]

I am all in for a Gaming, News and Politics, and Etcetera forum. The community needs it.

Click to shrink...

Last time that was tried, by the previous admin team, y'all had a mini-riot.

I will say, I would like to see more silly and weird threads. Not stuff that would make women on the site uncomfortable, but more fun stuff in general that everyone can feel good about posting in or reading. And honestly, I think the rest of the mod staff is with me on that one.

 

[Deleted member 1248]

It's amusing that people think they can actually separate politics and social issues from any of the media they consume. Like we're all gonna agree to just not discuss it when it comes up in relation to a movie or show or game.

 

[Yippiekai]

Last time that was tried, by the previous admin team, y'all had a mini-riot.

I will say, I would like to see more silly and weird threads. Not stuff that would make women on the site uncomfortable, but more fun stuff in general that everyone can feel good about posting in or reading. And honestly, I think the rest of the mod staff is with me on that one.

Click to shrink...

Silly and weird threads won't change the issue. They will just get pushed out of the front page, like all the others. People are more interested in any thread where you can hate someone that did something bad, even if the response to the action is unjustified. We are in a day and age where we prefer to feel outraged by things instead of praising the things that need to be praised. It's easier to be an ass on the internet than in real life so people really go all out on the negative feelings here.

 

[Jimnymebob]

They tried that and the majority of people disliked it. Those threads are also often on the front page because they generate a lot of views and discussion, separating them would just further bifurcate the userbase.

Click to shrink...

Yeah, I get what you mean, but I always feel like a lot of those threads only serve for negative discussion.

It's amusing that people think they can actually separate politics and social issues from any of the media they consume. Like we're all gonna agree to just not discuss it when it comes up in relation to a movie or show or game.

Click to shrink...

No, it's entirely possible, and this is kind of the line of thinking which makes this place so damn negative. Again, it's not a case of not discussing it, it's the case of who you're discussing it with.

Let's take Uncharted Lost Legacy for example: if there is a thread discussing how creative you can get with the enemy encounters, and a thread discussing if it was appropriate for a black character to be voiced by a white voice actress, which thread would someone with any common sense voice their issues on how they feel it isn't appropriate that a black character was voiced by a white voice actress, and how there should be more black, Asian, etc. voice actors getting roles in games?

 

[Symphony]

There is one thing I've always felt that could help offer early support, but that isn't possible to implement due to the reality of the internet - anonymous posting in specific community threads, with posts needing to be fully vetted by moderators before appearing. There are times where on forums over the years, including Era, that I've wanted to ask for advice regarding a difficult subject from people who have already been through the same, but with the permience of the internet it'd be out there for all to see forever, attributed to a username that real life friends know about, and so I've kept my mouth shut and forced on through alone.

But then if you think about the reality of it, permitting anonymous posts in sensitive community threads leaves them wide open to abuse from people wishing to weaponise that anonymity, without a trail leading to the poster how can you ban them? A case of the bad apples ruining it for everyone. I don't know if there is a solution to counter the worst parts of the internet that would allow such a feature to work, but if there is then it's something I think would help.

 

[RedMercury]

Silly and weird threads won't change the issue. They will just get pushed out of the front page, like all the others.

Click to shrink...

Do you have any evidence of that? All threads run their course eventually, every thread gets pushed off the front page. There's always a bunch of fun, or positive, or neutral threads on the front page.

Hey Era, say something nice about another member!

This is a thread I like to do every 6-7 months to try to generate some good vibes and positivity! To participate, just tag another Era member and say something nice about them. There's a lot of reasons to be feeling down, let's try to lift up some spirits! Nepenthe is always really nice and...

www.resetera.com

Say something nice about another member: The Return!

We haven't had this thread in quite a while, and it's always good to uplift people and try to brighten someone's day a bit. In a recent thread, some users thought that maybe Era was a bit too serious or confrontational, so let's set all that aside for a while and spread some good vibes! If...

www.resetera.com

Hey Era, say something nice about another member!

I was pretty bummed out yesterday with all the Kavanaugh stuff, and really just following too much news in general and being over-saturated with bad things going on in the world, I just though it would be cool if we could take a minute to say something nice about someone and spread around a...

www.resetera.com

These threads all did pretty well, right? Heck, go bump the one that isn't old if you want, or start a positive thread, the option is there.

 

[Yippiekai]

Do you have any evidence of that? All threads run their course eventually, every thread gets pushed off the front page. There's always a bunch of fun, or positive, or neutral threads on the front page.

Hey Era, say something nice about another member!

This is a thread I like to do every 6-7 months to try to generate some good vibes and positivity! To participate, just tag another Era member and say something nice about them. There's a lot of reasons to be feeling down, let's try to lift up some spirits! Nepenthe is always really nice and...

www.resetera.com

Say something nice about another member: The Return!

We haven't had this thread in quite a while, and it's always good to uplift people and try to brighten someone's day a bit. In a recent thread, some users thought that maybe Era was a bit too serious or confrontational, so let's set all that aside for a while and spread some good vibes! If...

www.resetera.com

Hey Era, say something nice about another member!

I was pretty bummed out yesterday with all the Kavanaugh stuff, and really just following too much news in general and being over-saturated with bad things going on in the world, I just though it would be cool if we could take a minute to say something nice about someone and spread around a...

www.resetera.com

These threads all did pretty well, right? Heck, go bump the one that isn't old if you want, or start a positive thread, the option is there.

Click to shrink...

You know you pretty much are hammering my point head on?

"There is a problem with negativity"
"We should do silly threads to fight that"
"It doesn't work"
"But look at those silly threads!!"

Like you said, all threads gets pushed off the front page. Like I said, all threads gets pushed off the front page.
It doesn't currently improve Resetera. They exist. The solution is already there. It doesn't work.

 

[Heraldic]

Just my two cents. It also concerns me when I see these type of threads. I have a bachelors in psychology. I'm not a trained therapist with a masters degree. My focus was behavioral, and neuropsychology. Counseling was the subject I least researched, besides my interest in the humanistic approach of Carl Rogers (worth a read). To the point, I see a recurring theme in many posts that feel these subjects should only be handled by trained therapists, and that the common lay person should not be involved, or could potentially amplify, thereby promoting or escalating a suicide. I feel nothing could be further from the truth.

We as fellow people in a shared experience of life do have a lot to contribute in dialogue with another person simply by reaching out. Remember, access to mental health services in the U.S. is sadly very difficult with many barriers such as distance, financial, and a shortage of therapists ; especially in rural areas. We could be all they have. Despite formal training we still have a lot to offer. Most of the responses I have read are very positive, nurturing and informative (suicide hotline, websites). Just offering another person that olive branch of shared suffering, and solidarity, can be significant. "You are experiencing this, well so am I. I understand your pain, let's talk"

And going back to Carl Rogers, he was a huge believer in group therapy. Yes, most of these sessions are headed by a trained therapist, but the basic principle foundation, and framework still remains the same. People in need, helping others who are also in need. Listening.

 

[RedMercury]

You know you pretty much are hammering my point head on?

"There is a problem with negativity"
"We should do silly threads to fight that"
"It doesn't work"
"But look at those silly threads!!"

Like you said, all threads gets pushed off the front page. Like I said, all threads gets pushed off the front page.
It doesn't currently improve Resetera. They exist. The solution is already there. It doesn't work.

Click to shrink...

I don't really agree that there's a problem with negativity, I've seen the assertion but not really any evidence to back it up beyond anecdotally saying it's an issue more than other forums

 

[Yippiekai]

I don't really agree that there's a problem with negativity, I've seen the assertion but not really any evidence to back it up beyond anecdotally saying it's an issue more than other forums

Click to shrink...

It's not because you don't agree with it that it negates completely how the others feel about it.
This whole thread here started because Resetera had some suicide threads in the last few days. People are negative about this world, where it goes, who rules it, how it will end... Coming here and just say "There is no problem, you have no proof" is a real lack of empathy.

 

[RedMercury]

Coming here and just say "There is no problem, you have no proof" is a real lack of empathy.

Click to shrink...

You should probably read my other posts in this thread, or in similar threads dealing with mental health, or threads I've created myself before making that assertion. And no, it has nothing to do with empathy to not think that era doesn't have more negativity than similar forums of this size. It's a completely legitimate opinion.

 

[Deleted member 5086]

Last time that was tried, by the previous admin team, y'all had a mini-riot.

I will say, I would like to see more silly and weird threads. Not stuff that would make women on the site uncomfortable, but more fun stuff in general that everyone can feel good about posting in or reading. And honestly, I think the rest of the mod staff is with me on that one.

Click to shrink...

Yeah I imagine some people weren't around for it, but... the backlash for this was very intense, despite having an announcement thread for it beforehand. People really, really, really didn't like it. I was a mod at the time, and as one of the people who were actually around to help out at the time, it was a very stressful situation to deal with.

 

[Deleted member 283]

It's not because you don't agree with it that it negates completely how the others feel about it.
This whole thread here started because Resetera had some suicide threads in the last few days. People are negative about this world, where it goes, who rules it, how it will end... Coming here and just say "There is no problem, you have no proof" is a real lack of empathy.

Click to shrink...

Well, that's the thing. I've lurked a lot in a lot of those suicides (parking because I'm not sure what to say/can't say anything better than anyone else already has before I get there and just being a lurker in general) and the vast, vadt majority of them have nothing to do with the dite at all but real-life issues those people have had. How the site is strictured or what is or isn't posted tends to be the least of their issues.

And as someone who has and still does deal woth many of those same issues myself, the same goes for me. I've definitely struggled with this, and it has absolutely nothing to do with this site. I love this dite and am just fine with it. My hang-ups, my issues are completely due to real-life stuff, such as work and job prospects and tye like, and ResetEra is just do neither here nor there in any way in terms of any of that.

And when I lurk in those threads, there are exception s, but the broad trend is the same, that it's due to real-life situations and what is or isn't posted here or the structure of the site or whatever doesn't begin to factor in.

So people uding this to talk about "the site is too much this" or "too much that" or whatever and taking out all these other grievances is just super weird to me and is giving me huge like Mandela effect vinrs or something because that just personally hasn't been my experience with those kind of topics, it's not what I personally usually see, so it's just personally weird to me that that keeps definitively getting brought up as the answer when they hasn't been my experience at all, if that makes sense.

Like, whether the site is too negative or not or whatever not only is it not my experience at all, but even if it were true anyway, which I disagree with, but even if I were to grant it anyway, extremely few of the suicide threads I've lurked in have anything to do with "this site is too negative" or "too much bad news is posted" but rather much more common threads are stuff like financial situations, like needing money to pay the bills that they don't have, including medical bills sometimes and just feeling it's pointless regardless, or lacking a purpose in life and a general feeling of not wanting to be a burden to others, sometimes some relationship stuff gets mixed in there or stuff like medical issues in general, but anything to do with tyr dite/general world news/a general sense of negativity tend to be much, much less common than idiosyncratic and deeply personal stuff like that that none of these suggestions would do anything to change since they're not in any way tye problem to begin with in tye majority of cases so focusing on them so much anyway is just kind of really, really odd to me, and I hope that makes sense.

 

[darkazcura]

Last time that was tried, by the previous admin team, y'all had a mini-riot.

I will say, I would like to see more silly and weird threads. Not stuff that would make women on the site uncomfortable, but more fun stuff in general that everyone can feel good about posting in or reading. And honestly, I think the rest of the mod staff is with me on that one.

Click to shrink...

What I remember was them merging the community threads into the main forums. I don't remember them ever creating essentially a second OT board. Merging the community boards into the main forums was a bad idea and the 'mini riot' made sense. This is a very different idea.

The closest I remember is someone suggesting a politics board, and I get why that is an issue also. It was never tried, though. Just make it a news board. All the headlines in one spot for discussion. I don't know why people would be against that but who knows.

Maybe I am missing the feature, but I wish categorizing threads was forced for every thread owner. Then people could filter out what they don't like. If the boards can't be split up, at least let people sort out topics they personally don't want to see.

 

[Yoshimitsu126]

ERA is not a healthy place to be, especially for people who have anxiety, depression and other issues that are exacerbated by an endless flood of nihilistic shit that people post.

I'm extremely concerned that suicide threats aren't instantly locked and reported on, especially when you factor in that people who are making suicide threads are very likely being influenced by what they are consuming on ERA as well. It's beyond reckless that mods let these threads stay open and let untrained posters deal with someone who may or may not be having a "cry for help".

Not to mention, it isn't healthy for the community at all if suicide threads are just allowed to be on the top of the OT page for an entire day, it's not fair to people who suffer from suicidal idolization if they see a thread about self arm get flooded with support, and not fair for people who are just on ERA to see a thread where someone is threatening self harm. There really seems to be a complete lack of regard for basically everyone else and the impact these threads have on others in the community.



If your average internet poster can talk someone out of suicide, then a trained professional will almost always have the toolset to do that. And what about the flip side? How can you be sure that random people on the internet aren't going to say the wrong thing and cause far more issues than just locking the thread, contacting authorities if needed, or posting a the suicide hotline? This blind faith on the general ERA posting population to handle suicide threads is insane.

There has been a lot of talk about moderation of the last few months, and by far the lack of any action on suicide threads is probably the most reckless shit I've seen in regards to the mods choosing to do nothing and letting the threads stay up and have untrained people openly comment and "help" OP's who are claiming to wanting to self harm or end their lives.

Click to shrink...

Agreed. If anything a mod can reply with a link to resources before closing the thread.
But I agree with having mental health issue thread stickied and maybe a locked suicide awareness thread stickied as well. That thread could have links to helpful resources for those seeking help.

 

[Deleted member 283]

Like, I think a lot of y'all have it backwards. If you think this place has more suicidal ideation threads compared to site X and site Y, could it be just perhaps NOT because ResetEra is more negative or whatever than any of those sites, NOT because of anything like that, but perhaps, JUST PERHAPS.... maybe the exact opposite?

That is, perhaps the reason they post them here versus those other sites, could it maybe, just maybe be thst this site is more accepting of those people and precisely because those threads don't tend to be instantly locked here, and that being the case had actually helped out a number of people time and time again, tysts definitely something I've seen happen a lot in those threads very fortunately, that the bulk of them thankfully tend to end well with the OP being very thankful for people's support and talking them out of it and stuff, other just giving them a chance to clear their head and just get thst all out?

And that just maybe, just maybe, that if there are indeed more threads here compared to other places (which I wouldn't know because this is really the only online space I hang out these days), but assuming that's the case, that that's precisely because, nothing to do with the site being too negative or whatever, but rather precisely the opposite, because tye community here is actually supportive and doesn't tell them to just go elsewhere or just locking the thread with links to phone numbers that might be well-intentioned but completely fucking useless to them because say they're in a completely different country or say because they have too much social anxiety to speak on the phone with someone and that's why they're posting about it on an Internet message board in tye first place...

And that, looking at it from that perspective, it could be just perhaps a sign not about the site being too negative but perhaps, just perhaps thst people feel comfortable and safe opening up about extremely personal information and details about themselves in a way they don't necessarily feel safe/comfortable doing at other sites, and it's a sign of how suppportive and great this community is that people even feel safe enough to do that here in the first place, to make themselves thst vulnerable, and it has nothing at all to do with the site being too negative or whatever (which, as I covered in my previous post, while there are exceptions, isn't usually the type of thing to get brought up to begin with), but those are just my two cents on all this.

 

[carlsojo]

What I remember was them merging the community threads into the main forums. I don't remember them ever creating essentially a second OT board. Merging the community boards into the main forums was a bad idea and the 'mini riot' made sense. This is a very different idea.

The closest I remember is someone suggesting a politics board, and I get why that is an issue also. It was never tried, though. Just make it a news board. All the headlines in one spot for discussion. I don't know why people would be against that but who knows.

Click to shrink...

I think that the problem you would have by creating a third board is that people would complain that "important issues" weren't getting enough exposure.

 

[Lothar]

What I remember was them merging the community threads into the main forums. I don't remember them ever creating essentially a second OT board. Merging the community boards into the main forums was a bad idea and the 'mini riot' made sense. This is a very different idea.

Click to shrink...

Is that what was tried? Because Merging is the direct opposite of what's being suggested here. Of course Merging would cause a riot. I don't see why anyone would have an issue with an additional forum.

 

[Yoshimitsu126]

What I remember was them merging the community threads into the main forums. I don't remember them ever creating essentially a second OT board. Merging the community boards into the main forums was a bad idea and the 'mini riot' made sense. This is a very different idea.

The closest I remember is someone suggesting a politics board, and I get why that is an issue also. It was never tried, though. Just make it a news board. All the headlines in one spot for discussion. I don't know why people would be against that but who knows.

Maybe I am missing the feature, but I wish categorizing threads was forced for every thread owner. Then people could filter out what they don't like. If the boards can't be split up, at least let people sort out topics they personally don't want to see.

Click to shrink...

+1. That merging was weird and having news in one place when we want to look for them would be nice.

 

[Deleted member 5086]

What I remember was them merging the community threads into the main forums. I don't remember them ever creating essentially a second OT board. Merging the community boards into the main forums was a bad idea and the 'mini riot' made sense. This is a very different idea.

The closest I remember is someone suggesting a politics board, and I get why that is an issue also. It was never tried, though. Just make it a news board. All the headlines in one spot for discussion. I don't know why people would be against that but who knows.

Click to shrink...

That was only part of the complaints. The other part was placing politics into a separate forum where serious issues would go ignored, and there was a lot of disdain for this idea. That's obviously not what the staff were trying to do, and serious topics would still be allowed in an entertainment section (just like they are on gaming side), but this concern still persisted and I can empathise with why. A lot of people really value that such issues garner serious discussion here. Given the intensity of the backlash though, I think it's quite unlikely it will be attempted again. At least any time soon.

 

[darkazcura]

I think that the problem you would have by creating a third board is that people would complain that "important issues" weren't getting enough exposure.

Click to shrink...

I would argue that it is all there for people to see if they want to. Nothing would be taken away.

If another forum couldn't be created, we need to look into categorizing every thread to allow for filtering. I would love to filter out threads that are categorized news or politics when I want to 'escape'. It would help with my anxiety levels personally.

 

[darkazcura]

That was only part of the complaints. The other part was placing politics into a separate forum where serious issues would go ignored, and there was a lot of disdain for this idea. That's obviously not what the staff were trying to do, and serious topics would still be allowed in an entertainment section (just like they are on gaming side), but this concern still persisted and I can empathise with why. A lot of people really value that such issues garner serious discussion here. Given the intensity of the backlash though, I think it's quite unlikely it will be attempted again. At least any time soon.

Click to shrink...

Fair enough, I suppose, but I disagree with splitting politics also. I'm talking about news and politics. The issue people had back then was splitting up news and politics and how there is a fine line in what defines both. That's what scared people, imo. That's why I would suggest a 'News and Politics' forum rather than splitting politics out on its own island which was the big concern. I wouldn't want news and politics separate either. They often go hand in hand, and that was a reason why a lot were against it.

If that won't happen, I would consider an option to force every thread owner to categorize or tag their threads, so a filter option could be applied. If I could filter out news and politics in my personal settings, I feel like it could help with some of my mood/anxiety that builds up when I want to 'escape' from real life at times.

 

[Yoshimitsu126]

That was only part of the complaints. The other part was placing politics into a separate forum where serious issues would go ignored, and there was a lot of disdain for this idea. That's obviously not what the staff were trying to do, and serious topics would still be allowed in an entertainment section (just like they are on gaming side), but this concern still persisted and I can empathise with why. A lot of people really value that such issues garner serious discussion here. Given the intensity of the backlash though, I think it's quite unlikely it will be attempted again. At least any time soon.

Click to shrink...

I think this community's culture would actually benefit more with a separate news section since many of us like to view and discuss news here already. We already built a brand in being inclusive and taking news seriously. Having it all in one place makes it easier to collect and discuss them.

 

[Lothar]

Like, I think a lot of y'all have it backwards. If you think this place has more suicidal ideation threads compared to site X and site Y, could it be just perhaps NOT because ResetEra is more negative or whatever than any of those sites, NOT because of anything like that, but perhaps, JUST PERHAPS.... maybe the exact opposite?

That is, perhaps the reason they post them here versus those other sites, could it maybe, just maybe be thst this site is more accepting of those people and precisely because those threads don't tend to be instantly locked here, and that being the case had actually helped out a number of people time and time again, tysts definitely something I've seen happen a lot in those threads very fortunately, that the bulk of them thankfully tend to end well with the OP being very thankful for people's support and talking them out of it and stuff, other just giving them a chance to clear their head and just get thst all out?

And that just maybe, just maybe, that if there are indeed more threads here compared to other places (which I wouldn't know because this is really the only online space I hang out these days), but assuming that's the case, that that's precisely because, nothing to do with the site being too negative or whatever, but rather precisely the opposite, because tye community here is actually supportive and doesn't tell them to just go elsewhere or just locking the thread with links to phone numbers that might be well-intentioned but completely fucking useless to them because say they're in a completely different country or say because they have too much social anxiety to speak on the phone with someone and that's why they're posting about it on an Internet message board in tye first place...

And that, looking at it from that perspective, it could be just perhaps a sign not about the site being too negative but perhaps, just perhaps thst people feel comfortable and safe opening up about extremely personal information and details about themselves in a way they don't necessarily feel safe/comfortable doing at other sites, and it's a sign of how suppportive and great this community is that people even feel safe enough to do that here in the first place, to make themselves thst vulnerable, and it has nothing at all to do with the site being too negative or whatever (which, as I covered in my previous post, while there are exceptions, isn't usually the type of thing to get brought up to begin with), but those are just my two cents on all this.

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What good is it doing to ignore the site being negative, when it's a fact, or it's fact that it's at least seen this way? Mods have agreed that the atmosphere is dour. It's silly to act like that the obvious depressive nature here has nothing to do with it also getting a lot of suicide threads. And I don't think people contemplating suicide feel very accepted, so I don't think patting ourselves on the back for being accepting is a good way to view it either.

 

[The Unsent]

I might understand this argument if we only had one board. But we already have two (really four with communities). We even have a politics community thread. Yet, I don't perceive there being a chilling effect on discussing game-related politics on the gaming side. Do you? If not, why would adding another board change that?

I've been posting on internet forums for more than two decades now, and in my experience the only thing that actually stops people from bringing politics into any thread is strict moderation. Based on what I have seen from this site's moderators and community, I have a hard time believing that would happen.

Mind you, I'm not certain that more boards is necessarily the best or only solution to the problems raised in this thread. However, I think it speaks poorly to the community if we have to dismiss a possible solution because we are too worried about the external optics or about a slippery slope fallacy.

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Sorry it's not meant to be a fallacy, I appreciate Era is more in depth than most gaming forums and I'd feel wary about how caterorising politics might be unconstructive to discussions.

I absolutely agree with this, and while I'm not advocating whatever website did the whole "you can't talk politically about video games" thing (was it Escapist?), I feel like both gaming and etcetera need a third subforum where people can just have an experience free from all the doom and gloom of the constant WW3 is happening right now, Trump did another stupid thing, Twitch steamer attacked their cat, developer refuses to include playable women characters threads that are constantly on the front page.

Like, I know a lot of video games are political, but sometimes I just want to talk about how impressive it was to be able to slip on seagull poop on MGS2, without getting into a big debate over the political elements of its story.

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That sounds hard to avoid, they're very political entertainment. Sorry if it's going off topic, just an example.

This topic is very serious. I wish I knew what a most positive change could be.

 

[Gestalt]

Gonna have to mirror some of the sentiments in this thread that the world news threads and suicide threads have been getting way too much for me lately and my usage of the site has gone down as a result. I don't know if it's the environment, thread content, site culture, or the userbase itself but the atmosphere sometimes rivals sites like 4chan that are known for being full of nihilistic and depressed people. This site just isn't somewhere where I feel sure I'll be able to walk away without feeling more stressed/anxious about my day, so I'm more likely to just hop on twitter or something instead.

 

[SpottieO]

I'll mirror some of the comments in that the vast majority of content posted here is too dark, depressing or nihilistic. Even threads on the gaming side get exhausting to read. I've got a stable of threads that I go to like the Eshop thread and then specific game OTs that aren't excessively depressing to read. I'm a very positive person in real life so the attitude of people on this site can just be exhausting at times.

 

[Iron Mike]

As much as I align with this forum politically, the constant catastrophising that takes place here makes it a very unpleasant place to browse, which I've pretty much stopped doing except for 5 minutes a week. If you're feeling suicidal, I suggest looking for more positive things do to. Reading Etcetera and debating with (a lot of) people on this site probably isn't going to be an incredibly positive experience due to the culture that's been allowed to prevail. It wasn't always this bad but it's festered.

 

[Uncivilized Elk]

This site just isn't somewhere where I feel sure I'll be able to walk away without feeling more stressed/anxious about my day, so I'm more likely to just hop on twitter or something instead.

Click to shrink...

I know it's easier to curate your twitter feed than this forum, but wow is twitter about 100x worse for my mental health than this forum. 1000x worse if I can't stop myself from reading twitter replies.

 

[Brass Body Dave]

I know it's easier to curate your twitter feed than this forum, but wow is twitter about 100x worse for my mental health than this forum. 1000x worse if I can't stop myself from reading twitter replies.

Click to shrink...

We should disable twitter embeds. There's a reason why a lot of people curate their lists and don't want to see everything under the sun.

 

[Deleted member 283]

And can I say one more thing?

Like, obviously directing people toward professionals is the best case scenario because professionals will be better equipped to handle these situations than anyone here (as, even if there are professionals among the community, said professionals would know it's not good to try and diagnose people over the Internet, etc, etc).

No duh, it would be best if people sought out professionals.

But if someone's not, then maybe, just maybe there's a reason fir that and just sending them to professionals isn't necessarily that helpful in the end?

Like, in my case, I want a professional psychologist. I really, really want one as that would really be the first step. But I can't afford one as not a single one of them accept Medicaid, and like hell can I afford one without that. Like, my patents ate helping me the best they can, but they're running into the same issue. None of them take my plan. And this is using the list of people that my insurance, Michigan Medicaid, recommends itself. It's all nonsense apparently and I have no idea what the deal with it is, but tye pint is, they don't take it.

So yeah, while obviously talking to a professional is the best case scenario and ehst should be done if at all possible, that at the same time, if someones not doing that, maybe, just maybe, there's a reason for that and the advice, while generally helpful and generally a good idea and definitely well-intentioned, is at the same time hardly a one-size-fits-all approach and there definitely has to be more consideration to a person's individual situation in there, that's all I'm getting at.

 

[Yippiekai]

It's a completely legitimate opinion.

Click to shrink...

That's it. An opinion. It doesn't invalidate everything else people think or feel.

Well, that's the thing. I've lurked a lot in a lot of those suicides (parking because I'm not sure what to say/can't say anything better than anyone else already has before I get there and just being a lurker in general) and the vast, vadt majority of them have nothing to do with the dite at all but real-life issues those people have had. How the site is strictured or what is or isn't posted tends to be the least of their issues.

And as someone who has and still does deal woth many of those same issues myself, the same goes for me. I've definitely struggled with this, and it has absolutely nothing to do with this site. I love this dite and am just fine with it. My hang-ups, my issues are completely due to real-life stuff, such as work and job prospects and tye like, and ResetEra is just do neither here nor there in any way in terms of any of that.

And when I lurk in those threads, there are exception s, but the broad trend is the same, that it's due to real-life situations and what is or isn't posted here or the structure of the site or whatever doesn't begin to factor in.

So people uding this to talk about "the site is too much this" or "too much that" or whatever and taking out all these other grievances is just super weird to me and is giving me huge like Mandela effect vinrs or something because that just personally hasn't been my experience with those kind of topics, it's not what I personally usually see, so it's just personally weird to me that that keeps definitively getting brought up as the answer when they hasn't been my experience at all, if that makes sense.

Like, whether the site is too negative or not or whatever not only is it not my experience at all, but even if it were true anyway, which I disagree with, but even if I were to grant it anyway, extremely few of the suicide threads I've lurked in have anything to do with "this site is too negative" or "too much bad news is posted" but rather much more common threads are stuff like financial situations, like needing money to pay the bills that they don't have, including medical bills sometimes and just feeling it's pointless regardless, or lacking a purpose in life and a general feeling of not wanting to be a burden to others, sometimes some relationship stuff gets mixed in there or stuff like medical issues in general, but anything to do with tyr dite/general world news/a general sense of negativity tend to be much, much less common than idiosyncratic and deeply personal stuff like that that none of these suggestions would do anything to change since they're not in any way tye problem to begin with in tye majority of cases so focusing on them so much anyway is just kind of really, really odd to me, and I hope that makes sense.

Click to shrink...

You're making good points and I feel like I was not really clear on the things I said. I'm not saying Reset is causing suicides. Of course, those threads were way more personal, with issues related with the people posting it.

But what I want to say is that we all know the world has gone to shit these last few years. We have an orange asshole running the first country in the world, a virus that spread at least as fast as the paranoia around it, UK deciding to fuck off and see if they can move the whole island as far away as possible to the other side of the atlantic, racism, anti semitism, homophobia and a shit ton of other issues. We know that and we don't like that.

Every day, we have threads on the last tweet President Fuckface wrote. Or some random republican doing stupid shit. Or how we will all die from the coronavirus because another country has been hit. And then one about a democrat runner-up, because, hey, you know, everyone in the world is shit and you should know it. Or how the economy is going straight down. For fuck's sake, today, I learned that Gwen Stacy from spiderman is a fuckin nazi sympathiser.

Then we have threads about lighter things, movies, games. Until it becomes really divisive because plot point/director/actor/developer is "choose one of any reason to be pissed, really". And the whole community start saying shit people shouldn't say to each other. Sometimes people gets banned. Sometimes they don't. But one or the other, when we're being assholes to one another here, where we are a community sharing some certain common sense about people and how we should destroy those inequalities and hate, it feels awful.

I personally find everything about those threads suffocating. It's something that slowly eats me sometimes. I know I'm part of the issue here, like a whole bunch of other users. I tend to lurk more easily about sensational topics, to see if someone I know is shit can anger me even more. It also helps that some threads more "clickbaity" are not about loveable cat pictures.

What I'm saying is, living in this constant remembrance that the world is shit really takes a toll on all of us. It won't be what causes anyone to break and end their life. But if you keep being surrounded with negativity all day long about how the world is fucked and everything we do is meaningless, maybe, just maybe, the next big issue you will have will tip the balance towards ending it all way more easily.

 

[sleepnaught]

If someone had really decided to end their life they wouldn't be posting about it here. I agree the forum being open to the conversation might be a good thing.

Click to shrink...

Sorry, but this is absolutely false. I've lost someone to suicide and they had been talking about it for months on an unnamed forum. Many people there tried to help him, but he lost that fight in the end and posted what he was going and did it.

I believe we even have a case or two of that happening right in this forum. If anyone ever talks about suicide, please for the love of God take it seriously. You'll regret it every day for the rest of your life if you dont.

 

[Deleted member 5086]

Fair enough, I suppose, but I disagree with splitting politics also. I'm talking about news and politics. The issue people had back then was splitting up news and politics and how there is a fine line in what defines both. That's what scared people, imo. That's why I would suggest a 'News and Politics' forum rather than splitting politics out on its own island which was the big concern.

If that won't happen, I would consider an option to force every thread owner to categorize or tag their threads, so a filter option could be applied. If I could filter out news and politics in my personal settings, I feel like it could help with some of my mood/anxiety that builds up when I want to 'escape' from real life at times.

Click to shrink...

I think this community's culture would actually benefit more with a separate news section since many of us like to view and discuss news here already. We already built a brand in being inclusive and taking news seriously. Having it all in one place makes it easier to collect and discuss them.

Click to shrink...

It was actually more like... there was a new Entertainment section, separate from Etcetera. Etcetera was for everything else, including politics.

The Entertainment section covered these topics (including any news related to them, which also meant serious social issues related to them would fit in there):

Movies, Comics, Television, Sports, Music, Literature, Toys, Anime and Celebrities.​

Etcetera covered these topics:

Technology, Science, Culture, Religion, Hobbies, Travel, Health, Fitness, Dating, Family, Politics, Lifestyles, Education, Employment, Finance, Cooking, Food, Fashion, Cars, Pets, Nature, Humor, Random Thoughts, Forum Games, and more.​

There was even a Q&A that mentioned this:

1) Where can we talk about political or social issues?

We know that our members are passionate about political and social issues. As long as the threads are relevant, you can talk about them on all 3 boards (Video Games, Entertainment, EtcetEra).

In the #MeToo era, many of the serious threads in the existing EtcetEra are related to entertainment, sports, and celebrities. A change to the structure will not affect much in terms of the visibility of serious stories, and an Entertainment board will still encompass plenty of serious topics.

Past Examples of serious entertainment-related stories include:

All of these stories would have been appropriate to post in the upcoming Entertainment section.

Click to shrink...

The staff quickly recognised that getting rid of the Etcetera hangouts section was a mistake, as it simply wasn't working. But we didn't get the feedback to simply make a hangouts section on top of the entertainment/etcetera sections. We were very clearly and collectively told that things should revert to the way they were, because they were fine as is. So that's what the admin team at the time did (I had no say in the decision as I was a mod at the time, but I did witness how incredibly stressful it was for everyone involved).

I can't speak definitively one way or another, and I wouldn't necessarily have anything against such a change myself, but I'm just explaining why the team would be very apprehensive about changing the structure of the forum again. It's a stressful and time consuming enough volunteer position as it is, and every time we get that kind of reaction, it's very taxing on everyone's mental health.

 

[darkazcura]

It was actually more like... there was a new Entertainment section, separate from Etcetera. Etcetera was for everything else, including politics.

The Entertainment section covered these topics (including any news related to them, which also meant serious social issues related to them would fit in there):

Movies, Comics, Television, Sports, Music, Literature, Toys, Anime and Celebrities.​

Etcetera covered these topics:

Technology, Science, Culture, Religion, Hobbies, Travel, Health, Fitness, Dating, Family, Politics, Lifestyles, Education, Employment, Finance, Cooking, Food, Fashion, Cars, Pets, Nature, Humor, Random Thoughts, Forum Games, and more.​

There was even a Q&A that mentioned this:



The staff quickly recognised that getting rid of the Etcetera hangouts section was a mistake, as it simply wasn't working. But we didn't get the feedback to simply make a hangouts section on top of the entertainment/etcetera sections. We were very clearly and collectively told that things should revert to the way they were, because they were fine as is. So that's what the admin team at the time did (I had no say in the decision as I was a mod at the time, but I did witness how incredibly stressful it was for everyone involved).

I can't speak definitively one way or another, and I wouldn't necessarily have anything against such a change myself, but I'm just explaining why the team would be very apprehensive about changing the structure of the forum again. It's a stressful and time consuming enough volunteer position as it is, and every time we get that kind of reaction, it's very taxing on everyone's mental health.

Click to shrink...

We all appreciate the effort you put in. It is very hard, I'm sure, especially as volunteers. Thank you.

I will say, I can understand the push back on that structure. That is very complicated and hard to police. What some of us are suggesting is just straight up News and Politics. Very simple to understand and curates it for those who want it.

Thanks for responding, though, and the transparency.

Logistically I don't know how hard the filter idea I mentioned would be, but I think that solves most people's issue without rocking the boat too much (or at all since it is functionally no different).

 

[Iron Mike]

I know it's easier to curate your twitter feed than this forum, but wow is twitter about 100x worse for my mental health than this forum. 1000x worse if I can't stop myself from reading twitter replies.

Click to shrink...

I completely disagree, but I suppose it depends on your interests. Also, I don't even give people on the political right wing the time of day, whereas it's easy to get into a debate/arguement on this place about not being left wing enough.

 

[Gestalt]

I know it's easier to curate your twitter feed than this forum, but wow is twitter about 100x worse for my mental health than this forum. 1000x worse if I can't stop myself from reading twitter replies.

Click to shrink...

Not for me, my feed is mostly just drawings, memes, pictures of homebrew robot figures, stuff about cars, some musicians and artists, and niche videogame stuff. I found that using the mute feature liberally as well as curating my own feed really helps a lot. Also trying to keep in mind that Twitter is inherently formatted to prioritize hot takes and snappy opinions so not bothering to use it like a news aggregator like some do. Usually the stressful content it was showing me would come from the same few accounts/sources/friends of friends so I just muted them. Rarely do I think to myself "I need to get off this stupid site" for reasons that relate to being stressed out, on Twitter it's usually just about losing an hour to scrolling endlessly.

 

[R0b1n]

it's quite saddening to see, definitely. This place can feel very doom and gloom at times, tethering to hyperbole, and not all people can take that in stride and remain optimistic.

 

[Lentic]

The way I think it should be is:
Etcetera -

News - For posting threads revolving around links to news articles or current events (new Marvel trailer, breaking news, etc.)​

Discussion - For direct engagement with the community through original content (what restaurants do you like, what did you think of the new Marvel movie, etc.)​

Hangouts - Same as usual​

A big problem with the site is that a lot of it has just become a news aggregator. This format would allow people who just want to shoot the shit to go directly to the discussion and avoid news topics altogether. Personally speaking, avoiding the news does wonders for my mental health. Not everyone needs to be absorbing it every single day. Staying up to date weekly is much more healthy. Ideally, I think the same format would work well on the Gaming side. Separate the news discussion from general discussion.

The people who want both could just click on the parent forum and get both boards combined together.

 

[Deleted member 5086]

We all appreciate the effort you put in. It is very hard, I'm sure, especially as volunteers. Thank you.

I will say, I can understand the push back on that structure. That is very complicated and hard to police. What some of us are suggesting is just straight up News and Politics. Very simple to understand and curates it for those who want it.

Thanks for responding, though, and the transparency.

Logistically I don't know how hard the filter idea I mentioned would be, but I think that solves most people's issue without rocking the boat too much (or at all since it is functionally no different).

Click to shrink...

Yeah, I get that. And there's a chance that would work out better. I just meant to explain the apprehension about restructuring the forum again. But thank you for understanding where I'm coming from as well.

 

[RedMercury]

That's it. An opinion. It doesn't invalidate everything else people think or feel.

Click to shrink...

Can you point to where I said it does? Of course it's an opinion.

Like, I think a lot of y'all have it backwards. If you think this place has more suicidal ideation threads compared to site X and site Y, could it be just perhaps NOT because ResetEra is more negative or whatever than any of those sites, NOT because of anything like that, but perhaps, JUST PERHAPS.... maybe the exact opposite?

Click to shrink...

Exactly.

Also, I made an attempt to compare some numbers here: https://www.resetera.com/threads/th...taff-post-before-posting.172243/post-29459909 and while it's not a complete picture, I don't know how Era is being painted as an outlier based on that. These are things people struggle with every day, but here people have the ability to put a voice to it that they wouldn't elsewhere.

 

[Secretofmateria]

I honestly hate this site some times. And i get incredibly frustrated by some of the takes i see here. But the thing is visiting gaf, then era has been such a daily part of my life for the better part of 10 years that its become sort of an addiction. I get anxious when i cant check era every two hours or so. And it fucking sucks. Some times this place pisses me off so much that i feel sick to my stomach. Its unhealthy as shit, and for whatever reason this fucking awful nihilism has been allowed to flourish on this site. Most threads are outrage bait, your opinion Is invalid because i posted someone esle's tweet that dissagree's with your opinion, this place can be trash some
Times. And i hate it because i used to love talking about video games here with folks, but this site just has this constant air of toxic negativity. People should be allowed to discuss whatever they need to, but it sucks that the threads that bring in the most clicks are the one's where people can feel as if they are on a moral high horse, or that they can insult other users, or get a shitty snarky comment in. Fuck.

sorry i really needed to vent.
Sorry for all of the swearing. I was frustrated and a lot of word vomit came out lol