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The conflict before you end your life
- Thread starter LexingtonKruger
- Start date
OP
OP
Wow this is so nice thank you. I fell asleep.
I appreciate the offer so much.
OP
OP
I am trying to find strength to deal with everything. A friend suggested I am not thinking properly due to depression. She suggests I try different medication though I'm opposed as I don't see any reason why this current medication shouldn't work. All the other medications come with the nasty side effects.
I am trying desperately to study but it's totally unclear what the teacher wants me to know.
I am just going to prepare to fail and I'll have to try again.
It's the most horrible feeling.
I am okay for now.
I am trying desperately to study but it's totally unclear what the teacher wants me to know.
I am just going to prepare to fail and I'll have to try again.
It's the most horrible feeling.
I am okay for now.
There is nothing wrong with failing.
People do it all the time. The most successful people have failed and keep trying.
We learn from our failures. Life isn't about a perfect run.
Isn't this like the second thread on this by the OP? You've had people offer pizza and an actual chemist offer to help you figure it out.
How about you take advantage of the generosity and resources people are offering instead of making threads about how terrible your life is.
How about you take advantage of the generosity and resources people are offering instead of making threads about how terrible your life is.
In freshman year of college 4 years ago if I had access to a gun as I was on the brink of failing a core class for my degree, I almost definitely would have killed myself. In fact I did end up failing 3 degree-relevant classes throughout my time at school, and I still made it through with a 3.48 GPA. Also, this year has been incredibly stressful for me to find an internship, the last thing I needed to graduate. Also, if I didn't find one by the end of the year, I would have been kicked out of school and would have to reapply altogether. I was also flirting with the possibility of killing myself on New Years since my parents have a shotgun sitting right at the front door. Thankfully, I ended up getting an internship for this semester and will be graduating in December. But the point is that while you are alive and pushing forward, there's always a chance of coming out the other side no matter what.
OP
OP
This isn't helping. No one is under any obligation to accept offered assistance, nor should they feel bad if they choose not to.
It's just some pizza.
I was referring moreso to the chemist and chemistry professor offering help.
I felt the same way last year when I failed a class, but believe me, it's not that bad. I did the class again this year with a really good teacher and learned more than I would otherwise.
And don't be scared of medicine, depression is a disease like any other, and if it happens to have bad side effects you can change it.
I dropped so many freaking college courses, but eventually I graduated.
Drop this course and take it again next semester. Don't let your teacher be the deciding factor of your life, they don't deserve that. Come back stronger next time.
I remember dropping biology at least once. I dropped an economics course 3 times and passed it the 4th. That's a whole semester dedicated to one class.
You got this, just have to keep trying!
Drop this course and take it again next semester. Don't let your teacher be the deciding factor of your life, they don't deserve that. Come back stronger next time.
I remember dropping biology at least once. I dropped an economics course 3 times and passed it the 4th. That's a whole semester dedicated to one class.
You got this, just have to keep trying!
I always like to say, probably something I heard from Doctor Who: Where there's life, there's hope. I take it to mean that as long as there is life, there are chances that things will get better. Even if it's only a 1% chance, there is a chance. In death, there are no chances for anything to improve, only the single outcome of irretrievable loss. Every moment you're alive is a chance to move in a better direction, even if things are hard and even if you make mistakes. It's sometimes very difficult to recover from the situations we find ourselves in or traumatic shit that happens to us or that we're born into, but it's possible to do so especially with help from others. Living is no easy feat and to be sentient at it's core is to be privy to suffering, but as long as you are alive, there is still a hope that things can get better.
Every person I know with depression had to try differing medication and levels of medication before they got things right. It was a hard journey for every one of them.
Wholeheartedly agree. To end things is to deny yourself all these moments that you think will never exist but can exist and will exist. Good moments, happy moments, beautiful moments. The world is a tough place for many. Nay, for most, but if you carry on you experience the upticks. Even the most impossible things become possible in time. I've had fleeting moments of true despair, you think you're not good enough, but you are, you truly are. There are so many stories. People who were an inch away from closing off their story, but something happened, someone happened, something happened, and they are here recounting their tales years, decades later having lived a whole life that they never thought possible.
And I understand, I truly do. I'm quite a nihilist I suppose but to be super cliche, every cloud has a silver lining. Darkness is just a moment in between the brightness.
Edit: Listen to those with more solid, less flowery advice than my own. Whether it be medication or meditation your mind is a machine that can be fixed, improved upon and thus can change your entire outlook.
The anime movie End of Evangelion is about this, at its core.
Stay strong OP, failure is part of life, everyone's life in fact, we all go through rough patches.
It can be depressing, hard to accept, but later on you'll look back and see these events as only a small piece of dust in your story.
That's not true.
How about other types of really big change? Moving to a completely different place to get out of the grind. There's so much out there to experience.
How old are you? What are things that have brought joy in the past?
Yup, that's Eva in a nutshell.
OP, if you're going through hell, keep going. It will get better.