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Should I feel comfortable that my SO introduces me as her "best friend"?

Deleted member 49319

Account closed at user request
Banned
Nov 4, 2018
3,672
The girlfriend I've been with for five years and I have been trying to figure out some alternative ways to refer to each other as boyfriend/girlfriend no longer feels right at this stage. But so far no word has been feeling right, like partner. We used it shortly and decided to drop that.

Since that she has been introducing me to people in different weird jokey ways, ranging from "roommate", "co-cat owner" to "emotional support".
And last week she introduced me as her best friend. I know it's great for someone to call the person they are in relationship with a best friend privately, but I am not sure it's good to be introduced in this way. To be honest I don't feel good but I don't know if I should have a conversation about it.
 
sphagnum

sphagnum

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
16,058
You're being silly. She's just testing out a new term, which she's already been doing.

If you don't like that one, just ask her not to say it next time.
 
Admiral Woofington

Admiral Woofington

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
14,892
OP I've played many a Bioware game so I'm kind of an expert on relationships.

You clearly didn't complete your S.O.'s loyalty mission and need to reload a past save.
 
mm04

mm04

Member
Oct 27, 2017
584
Simple, hold hands prior to introduction and then just be introduced by name. Boyfriend, significant other etc., is implied.
 
UltraJay

UltraJay

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
1,574
Australia
You really should try partner. Pretty much everyone here in Australia uses it to describe their SO. I guess that is the reason it doesn't feel weird or anything here.
 
WolfeTone

WolfeTone

Member
Oct 25, 2017
611
Just communicate this to your partner. Let them know you think it fails at communicating the romantic element from your relationship and suggest another term that you find more appropriate.
 

Deleted member 224

Oct 25, 2017
5,629
I thought it was odd until I read your post. You don't want to use boyfriend/girlfriend and have been trying out different terms for a while. She used "best friend". Is there a reason you decided boyfriend/girlfriend wasn't working anymore? Was it not intimate enough? If so then maybe it's an issue but otherwise not at all
 
Man God

Man God

Member
Oct 25, 2017
38,306
This is a great one as it either means they love you and trust you beyond anyone else or are embarrassed to even consider you as partner material!
 
Static

Static

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
6,108
"My future fiance." "My next ex-husband/wife." "The jerk I'm boning right now."

But really, you should probably just use partner.
 
Notaskwid

Notaskwid

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
5,652
Osaka
You've been together for 5 years, how many more people are there to be introduced to.
Why not just use the name?
 
.exe

.exe

Member
Oct 25, 2017
22,233
May I suggest...

tSlfatZ.gif


Pardner?
 
Kuro

Kuro

Member
Oct 25, 2017
20,654
Have her introduce you as The Captain. Worked for all my girlfriends and it still works for them. All 5 of them.
 
FFNB

FFNB

Associate Game Designer
Verified
Oct 25, 2017
6,118
Los Angeles, CA
"Hetero-lifemate" seems like a good one.
In all seriousness, "boyfriend/girlfriend" seems fine. I mean, it's pretty much boyfriend/girlfriend until she becomes your fiancé.

I referred to my ex-wife as girlfriend until we got engaged. Well, that or introduce her by her first name only. The fact that we were holding hands, had arms around each other, or pecked each other on the lips was usually enough to convey we were more than friends.
 
Joe

Joe

Member
Oct 25, 2017
8,612
Sometimes I introduce my wife as my "ex-girlfriend." Then she pretends like it's some tired, mean joke that she's sick of, but privately we laugh about it.

Also, when we were dating for a long time (like nine years), she told me the same thing about "boyfriend." That she didn't like telling people at work that she had a "boyfriend" because it sounded so immature. Those were hints that I should propose (that I took way too long to pick up on).

What I'm trying to say here is, yeah, talk to her. You two are the only two people in the world who know your relationship.
 
TrueSloth

TrueSloth

Member
Oct 27, 2017
6,067
You can also clarify to the people that she introduces you to that you guys fuck. Wink after you say that.
 
SweetNicole

SweetNicole

The Old Guard
Member
Oct 24, 2017
6,542
sounds like you really need a term to express a similar level of being married without being married

maybe life partner?
 
BringBackSonics

BringBackSonics

Member
Oct 27, 2017
45,195
Seattle
Aestivalis said:
The girlfriend I've been with for five years and I have been trying to figure out some alternative ways to refer to each other as boyfriend/girlfriend no longer feels right at this stage. But so far no word has been feeling right, like partner. We used it shortly and decided to drop that.

Since that she has been introducing me to people in different weird jokey ways, ranging from "roommate", "co-cat owner" to "emotional support".
And last week she introduced me as her best friend. I know it's great for someone to call the person they are in relationship with a best friend privately, but I am not sure it's good to be introduced in this way. To be honest I don't feel good but I don't know if I should have a conversation about it.
Click to expand...
Click to shrink...

Stop looking for advice here and TALK to your SO
 
Subpar Scrub

Subpar Scrub

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
3,576
Stop giving a fuck whether you "should" or "shouldn't" feel comfortable about something. If you don't like it, speak up and communicate. If you're indifferent then don't worry about it. This isn't complex OP.
 
voOsh

voOsh

Member
Apr 5, 2018
1,665
If it bothers you tell her. I think boyfriend and girlfriend is fine to use when meeting new people because those people have no context to your relationship anyways.

But really I don't think you have anything to worry about unless she asks for permission to have a threesome with her best friend and best friend's boyfriend.
 
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