Sex Ed Era: Judgement-free zone for questions

[Nooblet]

Maybe use some backup protection with the thinner one if your'e worried. (spermicide)

That way way you can see how things go, and then you'll be more comfortable/or sure of whether you like it or not. I think they're tighter for a reason.

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Actually I didn't think of it this way i.e. the extra thin ones being tighter for a reason, due to the texture and the thickness it sits on like a 2nd skin.
It'd actually makes sense if that was the case.

Bit of a weird question but what should I be expecting from a blowjob? This is my first adult relationship, been going on for about four months now.

As amazing as it has been with my girlfriend, sex has been a bumpy road for me. First I couldn't come through fucking because of years of death grip, then only ever in one position. Now I have a few decent moves and can finish pretty fast if need be but still cannot come from a blowjob for the life of me, no matter how turned on I am in the moment. Becoming a bit of a complex now, my girlfriend has been understanding and helpful throughout but this in particular has taken a knock to her confidence, and I can't help but feeling self conscious while in the act.

Ofc a lot of this is on me and I need to find a way to relax, but anything I can tell my partner to do?

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Ya know, it's funny cause back in March I said this in reply to your post above.

Man I came in here to say pretty much the exact thing.
It feels good but then suddenly it'll hit a sensitive spot and I'll lose all enjoyment and go soft, same during penetration. I do not have issues lasting but I don't seem to be able to get much stimulation going that gets me to finish and it's worse during blowjobs, I can feel being close but then something somewhere will happen and it's back to square one again. I'm also very sensitive to the environment and it could be something as minor as a temperature change, a little bit of discomfort in my foot etc and I'll get distracted and I don't really know what I can do about it. It may be a mental thing but I'm comfortable with my own body because I'm physically fit and flexible and I'm often in better shape than most people guys or girls I'm with. I tried to think less and just enjoy it, but trying to think less ends up feel forced and as such takes my attention away causing me to get distracted again lol.

It's a bit problematic now as maybe it's years of death grip or something causing my body to feel accustomed to something specific and now that I'm suddenly sexually active this change isn't compatible with what my body expects. If someone has any suggestions on what I can possibly do then I'd be glad to hear it.

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Since then I've met this girl who changed everything for me when it came to BJ, I realised after sleeping with her that all the BJs that I got before from others were just either too toothy, not deep enough, not the right pace, not enough attention to the testicles, not enough eye contact, not the right movements etc etc. Basically it was several things here and there. But with her it's like she is a wizard and does all kinds of magic and it's just perfect. So I think it just depends on the person giving them. Some are good at it some aren't, just have to work around it really and not let it hinder you.

 

[Deleted member 9182]

Okay wierd question but I had to get a medical circumcision about 3 weeks ago and I swear to god my dick when erect is significantly smaller than what it was, I even compared old pictures and it's lost quite a bit of length. Is this normal?

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I can help answer this as it happened to me too. The simple answer is there's nothing gone wrong here, as all they did was remove the foreskin. However, because the skin around the circumcision point is still having to regain its elasticity back around the circumcision line itself, you won't be able to go to full length until the skin has fully healed itself which'll take a while longer, though bear in mind it took me a few months because my recovery went on for longer than usual. You just have to be patient on this one.

 

[Sheentak]

I can help answer this as it happened to me too. The simple answer is there's nothing gone wrong here, as all they did was remove the foreskin. However, because the skin around the circumcision point is still having to regain its elasticity back around the circumcision line itself, you won't be able to go to full length until the skin has fully healed itself which'll take a while longer, though bear in mind it took me a few months because my recovery went on for longer than usual. You just have to be patient on this one.

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Oh that's a relief

 

[Nooblet]

Maybe use some backup protection with the thinner one if your'e worried. (spermicide)

That way way you can see how things go, and then you'll be more comfortable/or sure of whether you like it or not. I think they're tighter for a reason.

Click to shrink...

So tried the elite in action. It didn't break obviously and was quite sturdy, the sensation was amazing but it did something that I've never experienced before, the ring was too tight around my shaft and when it came time to ejaculate the tightness actually prevented me from properly finishing. It was like turning on a faucet that's connected to a hose pipe and then squeezing/bending the hose thereby preventing proper flow. So I went in again after 2 mins with the same condom and while this time around it was much better felt proper I could still feel it was not 100% and there was still some left in me that wanted to be out but couldn't didn't. So yea I'll stick to large, it feels almost as good sensation wise anyway. It was basically like the first picture on the right hand side showing a tight fit in the "condom fitting" paragraph (don't worry it's not pictures of real dicks, just illustrations). https://www.theyfit.co.uk/pages/condom-size-chart

 

[Rainy]

Is this thread still active at all? I'm a little embarrassed about asking something but it seems to be a common problem.

 

[Solo]

Ask away!

 

[Rainy]

I'll just kinda start from the beginning. Had one relationship in high school for 9 months, was sexually active with no erection-related problems. And I was in a relationship from 2017-19 with someone on the pill. As the relationship went on we essentially started doing it without any protection and then before I came I would put one on. No problems.

Since that relationship ended...I've had sex a few times, but I've had some difficulties. So this girl I started dating a few weeks ago....the first time we had sex it was fine, everything went well. But since then, every time I get hard and try to put on a condom, my erection instantly dies? Literally right when I take it off it comes back. I'm sometimes able to get it back by stroking for a bit but it seems that when we're about to do the deed it dies again.

This has happened a few months ago with another girl as well. I mean I'm assuming it's all psychological at this point. It also doesn't help that I have an anxiety about losing my erection every time I use a condom which creates this cyclical thing of...losing my erection due to the anxiety. She's getting and IUD soon but still that doesn't matter because I want to deal with this problem. Of note, I've been using the same condoms since 2017.

 

[Disclaimer]

I'll just kinda start from the beginning. Had one relationship in high school for 9 months, was sexually active with no erection-related problems. And I was in a relationship from 2017-19 with someone on the pill. As the relationship went on we essentially started doing it without any protection and then before I came I would put one on. No problems.

Since that relationship ended...I've had sex a few times, but I've had some difficulties. So this girl I started dating a few weeks ago....the first time we had sex it was fine, everything went well. But since then, every time I get hard and try to put on a condom, my erection instantly dies? Literally right when I take it off it comes back. I'm sometimes able to get it back by stroking for a bit but it seems that when we're about to do the deed it dies again.

This has happened a few months ago with another girl as well. I mean I'm assuming it's all psychological at this point. It also doesn't help that I have an anxiety about losing my erection every time I use a condom which creates this cyclical thing of...losing my erection due to the anxiety. She's getting and IUD soon but still that doesn't matter because I want to deal with this problem. Of note, I've been using the same condoms since 2017.

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You're using the same condoms since 2017, so I assume they haven't been an issue in the past (i.e. it isn't their size)?

Anxiety is certainly the most common cause of erectile dysfunction, and it sounds like it's at play here, if only due to the vicious cycle of the E.D. causing it.

Have you tried abstaining from sexual activity for some days, to see if erections come/stay easier?

Since condoms are the cause of all this, you might also try working through any mental barrier on your own time -- outside of sex -- by using condoms alone, getting used to them again.

 

[papermoon]

I'll just kinda start from the beginning. Had one relationship in high school for 9 months, was sexually active with no erection-related problems. And I was in a relationship from 2017-19 with someone on the pill. As the relationship went on we essentially started doing it without any protection and then before I came I would put one on. No problems.

Since that relationship ended...I've had sex a few times, but I've had some difficulties. So this girl I started dating a few weeks ago....the first time we had sex it was fine, everything went well. But since then, every time I get hard and try to put on a condom, my erection instantly dies? Literally right when I take it off it comes back. I'm sometimes able to get it back by stroking for a bit but it seems that when we're about to do the deed it dies again.

This has happened a few months ago with another girl as well. I mean I'm assuming it's all psychological at this point. It also doesn't help that I have an anxiety about losing my erection every time I use a condom which creates this cyclical thing of...losing my erection due to the anxiety. She's getting and IUD soon but still that doesn't matter because I want to deal with this problem. Of note, I've been using the same condoms since 2017.

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Until someone with more expertise chimes in, my suggestion would be to try masturbating with a condom on. Maybe in a no-pressure situation set up in the most mentally pleasurable way for you. Hopefully, you can get your mind and body used to the condom or even associate it as an active turn-on. After that, maybe with your partner, ask her to stimulate you either manually or orally with the condom on. Maybe there's something about vaginal sex - concerns about pregnancy, etc. - that kills it for you.

Also, do penises change sizes as you get older? I honestly have no idea. But does the fit of the condom feel different. Too tight or otherwise uncomfortable. If that's an issue, maybe try a different brand.

 

[Rainy]

You're using the same condoms since 2017, so I assume they haven't been an issue in the past (i.e. it isn't their size)?

Anxiety is certainly the most common cause of erectile dysfunction, and it sounds like it's at play here, if only due to the vicious cycle of the E.D. causing it.

Have you tried abstaining from sexual activity for some days, to see if erections come/stay easier?

Since condoms are the cause of all this, you might also try working through any mental barrier on your own time -- outside of sex -- by using condoms alone, getting used to them again.

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Yeah I've never really had any issues with them. And I haven't abstained, but it could be worth a shot. So what I've done the last few days is try to use condoms when I'm on my own. I seem to have no real problem. (i.e. I can get an erection while wearing them, and if I put it on when I have an erection, I might lose the erection for a little bit, but it eventually comes back fairly quickly and i can ejaculate.)

Until someone with more expertise chimes in, my suggestion would be to try masturbating with a condom on. Maybe in a no-pressure situation set up in the most mentally pleasurable way for you. Hopefully, you can get your mind and body used to the condom or even associate it as an active turn-on. After that, maybe with your partner, ask her to stimulate you either manually or orally with the condom on. Maybe there's something about vaginal sex - concerns about pregnancy, etc. - that kills it for you.

Also, do penises change sizes as you get older? I honestly have no idea. But does the fit of the condom feel different. Too tight or otherwise uncomfortable. If that's an issue, maybe try a different brand.

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Yeah that's what I've tried doing the last few days, just hoping its working. And those are valid concerns.

I'm actually considering getting a new brand or type of condom just mix it up and see if that does anything too.

 

[papermoon]

Yeah I've never really had any issues with them. And I haven't abstained, but it could be worth a shot. So what I've done the last few days is try to use condoms when I'm on my own. I seem to have no real problem. (i.e. I can get an erection while wearing them, and if I put it on when I have an erection, I might lose the erection for a little bit, but it eventually comes back fairly quickly and i can ejaculate.)




Yeah that's what I've tried doing the last few days, just hoping its working. And those are valid concerns.

I'm actually considering getting a new brand or type of condom just mix it up and see if that does anything too.

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Sounds good. If - for whatever reason - it doesn't resolve itself right away, try not to stress about it too much. I know that's easier said than done. See what happens after your partner gets the IUD. Maybe the assurance of having to rely on the condom as only a secondary mode of birth control - like you used to - will return things to how they used to be.

 

[Rainy]

Sounds good. If - for whatever reason - it doesn't resolve itself right away, try not to stress about it too much. I know that's easier said than done. See what happens after your partner gets the IUD. Maybe the assurance of having to rely on the condom as only a secondary mode of birth control - like you used to - will return things to how they used to be.

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I never thought about the "secondary thing" that's actually a really good point.

And my partner has been nothing but supportive. I also just try to make her enjoy as much as i can (through oral or other forms of stimulation) since I feel a tad guilty.

 

[Dahbomb]

I'll just kinda start from the beginning. Had one relationship in high school for 9 months, was sexually active with no erection-related problems. And I was in a relationship from 2017-19 with someone on the pill. As the relationship went on we essentially started doing it without any protection and then before I came I would put one on. No problems.

Since that relationship ended...I've had sex a few times, but I've had some difficulties. So this girl I started dating a few weeks ago....the first time we had sex it was fine, everything went well. But since then, every time I get hard and try to put on a condom, my erection instantly dies? Literally right when I take it off it comes back. I'm sometimes able to get it back by stroking for a bit but it seems that when we're about to do the deed it dies again.

This has happened a few months ago with another girl as well. I mean I'm assuming it's all psychological at this point. It also doesn't help that I have an anxiety about losing my erection every time I use a condom which creates this cyclical thing of...losing my erection due to the anxiety. She's getting and IUD soon but still that doesn't matter because I want to deal with this problem. Of note, I've been using the same condoms since 2017.

Click to shrink...

I had very similar issue.

Used to be fine with or without condom. Before I was married with my wife, we had sex and it wasn't an issue until we decided to not tempt fate and use condom. Been a while since I used them so I would usually lose erection in the time it took fumbling around with the condom. And that one time was enough where it just started the vicious cycle of not being able to get it up at appropriate moments. My wife thought it was her but it was purely psychological on my part.

It was definitely mental for me but 3 things fixed it for me (now completely fine):

*Stop worrying about lasting long. Before I had sort of engraved myself to do whatever to prolong intercourse. I could get over 20 mins easily but it would take me a bit to get started.

*Stopped watching porn or relying on it to get off or to go to sleep. This is just a general tip for this thread. My sexual health improved greatly after doing this. Less expectations, less anxiety and external factors. Porn sex isn't really close to actual sex, most of it is awful for the woman (but they are paid to pretend like they are enjoying it when they may not be).

*Space out my sexual encounters. I used to try to force it every day because well... somehow I was convinced that it was good for long term relationships. I have seen that for me at least having sex 3-4 a week is a good enough rate (basically every other day, sometimes two day break). I am 31 now so I am not in my hormonal years anymore, I can take it slower.


As far as the condom issue goes, I got over it by doing sex normally at first and then before I feel like I would orgasm (or close enough) then I would put it on when it was peak hardness. Of course eventually my wife was on pills so we stopped using condoms altogether.

Generally speaking good physical health, exercising, dieting and mental health are big for sexual health... its all inter-related.

 

[Rainy]

I had very similar issue.

Used to be fine with or without condom. Before I was married with my wife, we had sex and it wasn't an issue until we decided to not tempt fate and use condom. Been a while since I used them so I would usually lose erection in the time it took fumbling around with the condom. And that one time was enough where it just started the vicious cycle of not being able to get it up at appropriate moments. My wife thought it was her but it was purely psychological on my part.

It was definitely mental for me but 3 things fixed it for me (now completely fine):

*Stop worrying about lasting long. Before I had sort of engraved myself to do whatever to prolong intercourse. I could get over 20 mins easily but it would take me a bit to get started.

*Stopped watching porn or relying on it to get off or to go to sleep. This is just a general tip for this thread. My sexual health improved greatly after doing this. Less expectations, less anxiety and external factors. Porn sex isn't really close to actual sex, most of it is awful for the woman (but they are paid to pretend like they are enjoying it when they may not be).

*Space out my sexual encounters. I used to try to force it every day because well... somehow I was convinced that it was good for long term relationships. I have seen that for me at least having sex 3-4 a week is a good enough rate (basically every other day, sometimes two day break). I am 31 now so I am not in my hormonal years anymore, I can take it slower.


As far as the condom issue goes, I got over it by doing sex normally at first and then before I feel like I would orgasm (or close enough) then I would put it on when it was peak hardness. Of course eventually my wife was on pills so we stopped using condoms altogether.

Generally speaking good physical health, exercising, dieting and mental health are big for sexual health... its all inter-related.

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I appreciate the thorough response. i think i might take your suggestions into consideration. Space out how often I masturbate will probably help, and I'll stray away from using porn. And she might get an IUD soon so I could kinda take your last point into account. I'll try my best to work through these issues. I kinda hate how cyclical the problem is lol.

 

[Dahbomb]

Toning down on masturbation helped a lot too for me. I still do it but not as frequently which was 1-2 times a day previously.

One time I went for 2 weeks without sex + maturbation (after I was marrie), and then when we finally did it I think we ended up doing it 5 times in a row or something lol. My legs turned to jelly afterwards (never skip leg day for gyms!).

 

[Jaaake]

So a bit of an embarrassing question but

Partner and I were having sex earlier and as I was 'finishing' I got the most sudden and intense headache I have ever had in my life. Like huge pain in the back of my head that lasted half an hour+! Made me feel quite weak in the extremities and I was just having an all round bad time.

Has this ever happened to you guys? Is it something to be concerned about?

 

[Doctor_Thomas]

So a bit of an embarrassing question but

Partner and I were having sex earlier and as I was 'finishing' I got the most sudden and intense headache I have ever had in my life. Like huge pain in the back of my head that lasted half an hour+! Made me feel quite weak in the extremities and I was just having an all round bad time.

Has this ever happened to you guys? Is it something to be concerned about?

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Dehydration, maybe?

 

[Disclaimer]

So a bit of an embarrassing question but

Partner and I were having sex earlier and as I was 'finishing' I got the most sudden and intense headache I have ever had in my life. Like huge pain in the back of my head that lasted half an hour+! Made me feel quite weak in the extremities and I was just having an all round bad time.

Has this ever happened to you guys? Is it something to be concerned about?

Click to shrink...

Sex headaches are unfortunately rather common, and the onset is usually approaching orgasm. It's probably nothing to worry about.

 

[RatskyWatsky]

um

is anyone here a doctor

I have a sex(ish?) related question that I don't wanna post here 😬

 

[Juan29.Zapata]

I'm a doctor. What's up?

 

[Kotto]

I'll just kinda start from the beginning. Had one relationship in high school for 9 months, was sexually active with no erection-related problems. And I was in a relationship from 2017-19 with someone on the pill. As the relationship went on we essentially started doing it without any protection and then before I came I would put one on. No problems.

Since that relationship ended...I've had sex a few times, but I've had some difficulties. So this girl I started dating a few weeks ago....the first time we had sex it was fine, everything went well. But since then, every time I get hard and try to put on a condom, my erection instantly dies? Literally right when I take it off it comes back. I'm sometimes able to get it back by stroking for a bit but it seems that when we're about to do the deed it dies again.

This has happened a few months ago with another girl as well. I mean I'm assuming it's all psychological at this point. It also doesn't help that I have an anxiety about losing my erection every time I use a condom which creates this cyclical thing of...losing my erection due to the anxiety. She's getting and IUD soon but still that doesn't matter because I want to deal with this problem. Of note, I've been using the same condoms since 2017.

Click to shrink...

I actually would run into this here and there myself. It is weird because I don't think it is anxiety because things would be fine for a while and then he will just be like, "You know what? I deserve a break" and just go limp right there. Of course, going raw is fine but its weird sometimes with a condom for me. I think it is a feeling thing, though.

Makes me wonder how would female condoms go.

 

[fanboi]

um

is anyone here a doctor

I have a sex(ish?) related question that I don't wanna post here 😬

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It is lupus.

 

[Pixieking]

It is lupus.

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If House taught us anything, it's that it's never lupus (except for that one time when it was).

 

[Lightning Count]

This more advice than a question for GayERA and Bisexual men.

Don't feel pressured into doing anal, yes it feels good, but it's also not for everyone.

Try other things, one of my personal favourite sex things to do with with guys is frottage. Take those two dicks and pairs of balls and rub them together as many ways as possible, trust me it feels amazing.

Also as a bonus, frottage is very low risk for contracting STI's because there is no penetration or exchange on of bodily fluids.

 

[Radec]

I guess porn really does have some negative effect. After months of drought, I met a girl few weeks ago and we did it 4 times already but I haven't finished once. We both got tired every time before I can feel I'm close to finishing.

I regularly do porn once a day due to lockdown and shit.

 

[dude]

I guess porn really does have some negative effect. After months of drought, I met a girl few weeks ago and we did it 4 times already but I haven't finished once. We both got tired every time before I can feel I'm close to finishing.

I regularly do porn once a day due to lockdown and shit.

Click to shrink...

Stop masturbating for a couple of weeks. Happened to me once after a period of depression, and it took some time for my sensitivity to go back to what it was.

 

[Illuvatar]

I guess porn really does have some negative effect. After months of drought, I met a girl few weeks ago and we did it 4 times already but I haven't finished once. We both got tired every time before I can feel I'm close to finishing.

I regularly do porn once a day due to lockdown and shit.

Click to shrink...

Did you masturbate a few hours before you had sex? It has happened to me but I usually masturbated beforehand.

Stop masturbating for a couple of weeks. Happened to me once after a period of depression, and it took some time for my sensitivity to go back to what it was.

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I don't think I've ever gone more than a day without, but if it helped you, all the better.

 

[RatskyWatsky]

It is lupus.

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Only time will tell!

 

[Perzeval]

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

 

[Night Hunter]

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

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If this is actually a real question

 

[Damien1990]

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

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It can depend on the location. If in the bathroom, down the toilet. If in the bedroom, in a tissue. Some people even use their socks/boxers but that is disgusting in my opinion. Some eat it.

 

[Lightning Count]

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

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Scrape it with my fingers and eat it, I've swallowed cum plenty of times before, both mine and other people's.

 

[SlasherMcGirk]

If this is actually a real question

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I know this is common but this confuses me. Anything less than say a bounty paper towel and well it's not enough. I need something with some absorption power.

 

[Mediking]

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

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I don't really milk myself anymore but when I did... it really depends on the location. Best place to do it is in the shower though

 

[Inugami]

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

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This is why having a foreskin is secretly the best. Can be comfortable in bed, then have a way to carry the load to disposal. Garbage, toilet, etc whatever is closest.

 

[Camwi]

I know this is common but this confuses me. Anything less than say a bounty paper towel and well it's not enough. I need something with some absorption power.

Click to shrink...

Use multiple tissues? Unless you're shooting off like a fire hose.

One is never enough for me, but two or three work fine for the trip to the bathroom.

 

[hwarang]

Girls like it when you lightly bite their jaw.

Go slow and foreplay. Don't go all in and just nut in the first 30 seconds.

 

[mentok15]

This is why having a foreskin is secretly the best. Can be comfortable in bed, then have a way to carry the load to disposal. Garbage, toilet, etc whatever is closest.

Click to shrink...

What. Why not just use a tissue of sock or something?

 

[disparate]

y'all can just rub one out into a toilet

What do guys do with their milk after pleasuring themselves?

Click to shrink...

flush

 

[Inugami]

What. Why not just use a tissue of sock or something?

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I could... but why? Seems like a waste of tissue or another piece of clothing I have to clean.

 

[mentok15]

I could... but why? Seems like a waste of tissue or another piece of clothing I have to clean.

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Couldn't it cause a mess though through spillage? Does it all fit in there all the time? I can only speak for myself but I don't think it would.

 

[Cosmic Bus]

How the hell do you overcome premature ejaculation that isn't related to sensitivity; those numbing condoms, sprays, and wipes don't do anything. I don't know if I've managed to go more than two minutes in my entire life, and more frequently than not, can't even make it to penetration. Anti-anxiety medication didn't help, the SSRIs I happen to be on currently don't have any effect either.

 

[Night Hunter]

How the hell do you overcome premature ejaculation that isn't related to sensitivity; those numbing condoms, sprays, and wipes don't do anything. I don't know if I've managed to go more than two minutes in my entire life, and more frequently than not, can't even make it to penetration. Anti-anxiety medication didn't help, the SSRIs I happen to be on currently don't have any effect either.

Click to shrink...

What exactly do you mean not related to sensitivity? Is it nerves?

 

[Shadybiz]

How the hell do you overcome premature ejaculation that isn't related to sensitivity; those numbing condoms, sprays, and wipes don't do anything. I don't know if I've managed to go more than two minutes in my entire life, and more frequently than not, can't even make it to penetration. Anti-anxiety medication didn't help, the SSRIs I happen to be on currently don't have any effect either.

Click to shrink...

Back when I had sort of an issue with this, I found that having a good fap before seeing my then SO would help to prevent that. Also just taking your mind off of the act itself. You hear guys joke about thinking about baseball while having sex; well, premature ejaculation is why that joke exists. You don't have to literally think about baseball, just try to focus your mind elsewhere.

 

[Cosmic Bus]

What exactly do you mean not related to sensitivity? Is it nerves?

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I used to think it was nerves, but even with a long term partner, the problem was always there. A doctor tried prescribing me Cymbalta for anxiety to see if that would help, but it had no effect.

It's also difficult to explain the issue because there isn't a specific feeling or sensation that I experience when it happens. For example, the last person I was with, we were like five minutes into making out/foreplay and suddenly I'm, uh, unloading all over the bed. I've never gotten that intense euphoria(?) people associate with orgasm, either, it just feels like a regular bodily function to me which seems to makes it impossible to predict or moderate myself to delay. 😞

 

[Night Hunter]

Cosmic Bus

But you do lose your errection afterwards? And do you have the same issue when masturbating? Both the ejaculating very fast and the fact, that you don't feel anything when orgasming?

 

[Cosmic Bus]

Cosmic Bus

But you do lose your errection afterwards? And do you have the same issue when masturbating? Both the ejaculating very fast and the fact, that you don't feel anything when orgasming?

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Yeah, it's no different when masturbating. I've very, very occasionally been able to maintain an erection after, but thats almost exclusive to masturbation if there's something keeping me especially engaged (whether a video or my imagination). I always lose the erection with another person out of embarrassment/shame/disappointment; there's a couple of instances where I was able to continue going, but those times were extreme outliers.

Probably worth mentioning that I'm a gay man in their 40s, started late, and have only actually had sex less than ~25 times. It's just so disheartening to go so long without really understanding what it feels like to have a happy, satisfying sex life.

 

[Night Hunter]

Cosmic Bus

Ok, forgive the strange questions, but have you ever been able to ejaculate a second time?

Because I've read of (a select few) men who are able to ejaculate multiple times without having an orgasm. I think there's even a pornstar who's able to do it. For them, ejaculation and orgasming are two completely different things.

So as hard as this has been for you, it might actually turn out to be your own personal superpower. But it might also be a medical condition.

Also, might I ask, are you a top or a bottom?

 

[Aomame]

How the hell do you overcome premature ejaculation that isn't related to sensitivity; those numbing condoms, sprays, and wipes don't do anything. I don't know if I've managed to go more than two minutes in my entire life, and more frequently than not, can't even make it to penetration. Anti-anxiety medication didn't help, the SSRIs I happen to be on currently don't have any effect either.

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Not a guy but have you been on the SSRIs since you've become sexually active? I was briefly on an anti-depressant and it really fucked up my ability to have satisfying orgasms (or orgasm at all).

 

[JorSneezy]

If House taught us anything, it's that it's never lupus (except for that one time when it was).

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And that one time it WAS lupus is the ONLY time nobody suggested lupus in the opening possible diagnosis' scene.