[edit: senior is a term for an experienced developer, you know]
This is the first time I'm in the role of recruiter instead of the applicant for a position, so I really want to make it fair and hire the best person as possible, possibly someone who is just out of school and not really experienced; our requirements are very simple and bare, we do not require past experience, we just want someone who is able to participate in code reviews possibly in person and will work from remote, without disappearing for weeks like some ugly experiences we had in the past. We've already received applications from seniors (developers), but I want to hire people who is young (or new) and that wouldn't have the same opportunities. There are already plenty of offers in my area for seniors (developers) too.
But this time, I receive the worst application I've ever seen. This candidate claims to be able to make "solutions that fit us like a fine bespoke dress" (literally wrote "tailor made" in the mail) by "deeply and intimately analyzing our business needs". They would improve our workflow, our quality of work, by cutting time. And their pay is literally three times of what a junior developer makes in my country. They sell "exclusive days" because their clients would get "the best attentions and the best price".
Their website breaks the GDPR and has 2 small examples of work, that might as well be outsourced. They have quotes from themselves and lavish phrases about how cool they are. Did I mentioned this is a candidate speaking in the majestic plural? And there is no mention in their curriculum about the actual requirements for the job.
I'm pissed.
First of all, I taught myself code. I never pretended to be a company to get some work.
Moreover, I never put in fake abilities in my curriculum vitae. I deeply dislike liars.
I'm sorry I can't offer a job to everyone. My fiancée has no job yet and has been discarded often in favor of shitty people.
Then some guy decides they're cool to come take the jobs for inexperienced people and even straight up try to bully out developers in the company. This is something that I've seen happening in the past: companies specialized in offering outsourced workers, head hunters, companies that straight up propose vertical solutions that would make my job obsolete as a CTO - though we have other projects where I'm fundamental anyway. Good thing we never really gave a fuck, and laugh instead about it. An outsourced solution will never have the personal and intimate connection with the project and business requirements, and we wouldn't ever replace our employees with companies.
I fucking hate this entire culture. I want to train a person and give them an appropriate job.
And if you ever read this know what not to do to get a job.
This is the first time I'm in the role of recruiter instead of the applicant for a position, so I really want to make it fair and hire the best person as possible, possibly someone who is just out of school and not really experienced; our requirements are very simple and bare, we do not require past experience, we just want someone who is able to participate in code reviews possibly in person and will work from remote, without disappearing for weeks like some ugly experiences we had in the past. We've already received applications from seniors (developers), but I want to hire people who is young (or new) and that wouldn't have the same opportunities. There are already plenty of offers in my area for seniors (developers) too.
But this time, I receive the worst application I've ever seen. This candidate claims to be able to make "solutions that fit us like a fine bespoke dress" (literally wrote "tailor made" in the mail) by "deeply and intimately analyzing our business needs". They would improve our workflow, our quality of work, by cutting time. And their pay is literally three times of what a junior developer makes in my country. They sell "exclusive days" because their clients would get "the best attentions and the best price".
Their website breaks the GDPR and has 2 small examples of work, that might as well be outsourced. They have quotes from themselves and lavish phrases about how cool they are. Did I mentioned this is a candidate speaking in the majestic plural? And there is no mention in their curriculum about the actual requirements for the job.
I'm pissed.
First of all, I taught myself code. I never pretended to be a company to get some work.
Moreover, I never put in fake abilities in my curriculum vitae. I deeply dislike liars.
I'm sorry I can't offer a job to everyone. My fiancée has no job yet and has been discarded often in favor of shitty people.
Then some guy decides they're cool to come take the jobs for inexperienced people and even straight up try to bully out developers in the company. This is something that I've seen happening in the past: companies specialized in offering outsourced workers, head hunters, companies that straight up propose vertical solutions that would make my job obsolete as a CTO - though we have other projects where I'm fundamental anyway. Good thing we never really gave a fuck, and laugh instead about it. An outsourced solution will never have the personal and intimate connection with the project and business requirements, and we wouldn't ever replace our employees with companies.
I fucking hate this entire culture. I want to train a person and give them an appropriate job.
And if you ever read this know what not to do to get a job.
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