People jumping to the defense of that post need to realize that if you want to talk about mental health, you can't be that insensitive.
People jumping to the defense of that post need to realize that if you want to talk about mental health, you can't be that insensitive.
Do you want to have a dialogue about mental illness or do you want to complain about moderation because this is all you guys have done. Telling someone with depression to man the fuck up is akin to saying "just kill yourself" its not fucking cool at all and there was nothing wrong with that user getting a ban for it.And if we are to have actual, fruitful discussion, bans can't be that reactionary. Yes it might take extra time to parse a posters intent, but it's worth the dialogue to dissect and learn from it.
Do you want to have a dialogue about mental illness or do you want to complain about moderation because this is all you guys have done. Telling someone with depression to man the fuck up is akin to saying "just kill yourself" its not fucking cool at all and there was nothing wrong with that user getting a ban for it.
Goes both ways. I still regularly have hospital visitsDon't fucking lecture me about mental illness. You're talking to someone who has attempted to take their life twice and nearly succeeded the last time.
Do you want to have a dialogue about mental illness or do you want to complain about moderation because this is all you guys have done. Telling someone with depression to man the fuck up is akin to saying "just kill yourself" its not fucking cool at all and there was nothing wrong with that user getting a ban for it.
RIP Etika. Had a lot of fun watching your Direct reactions.
The awareness of mental health issues is a general problem in our, you need to function, society. Im doing OT for a living and worked with people having for example depressions and bipolar disorder. And from my experiance mental illness does'nt have the equal status as a broken leg or a stroke, parcoinsons etc. couse you cant actually see it on person. So people more or less react with *cmon get out do something like partying and you'll be fine* but thats not how treatment of mental illness works at all.
I can understand that everybody has a different story, but what are the contributing factors? Maybe you are right, and i can not understand it because i don't feel that way. Yes the hurt and pain is there, but i process and coop with it differently. Is it then will or willpower, or no self worth?
Do you want to have a dialogue about mental illness or do you want to complain about moderation because this is all you guys have done. Telling someone with depression to man the fuck up is akin to saying "just kill yourself" its not fucking cool at all and there was nothing wrong with that user getting a ban for it.
Of course it is, but he genuinely dont know about the subject. So the "notoriously" is not valid here.Probably the whole "man the fuck up" part, which is a notoriously shitty thing to tell depressed people.
I'm sorry man, my mistake, it came out wrong. I wasn't annoyed at you at all. Annoyed at how inefficient mental health care is, though.
Sorry I snapped at words I've been hearing over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over my entire lifeIt's one thing to ban somebody who's being purposefully malicious and it's another thing to ban somebody who's genienuly asking while offering their own perspective AND experience with that particular issue.
Posts like yours are exactly the reason why some people here find issue with moderation, you just want their head on the platter because he said this one silly thing while completely ignoring the rest of his message.
I think he was saying 'man the fuck up' to himself. He didn't actually tell someone else to do it. He gets angry for seeing things he doesn't understand. It happens to all of us. After many attempts at something unknown, we get frustrated. Thats exactly what happens. He doesn't understand why others can't get through it the way he did. Thats fine. That is exactly why he asked. Reading from previous stories a lot of professional help was mentioned, but what does that mean exactly? I think that is what this person is looking for. Answers to how other people got through it."Man the fuck up"
"If you were really going to do it, you wouldn't be talking about it"
"Just kill yourself"
"Do it already then"
I've heard all of these before and so many others, and people who say these things don't think that they're helping. They're just selfish jerks who don't want to think about what other people are even going through. And there are countless people who have come in here and talked about their experiences with mental health, and this is a thread where the topic is literally someone dying. He could have stopped to actually listen to any one of us or think about the impact of what he was saying, but instead he just wanted to tell us how angry he gets when he sees depressed people and how we need to "man the fuck up"
I think he was saying 'man the fuck up' to himself. He didn't actually tell someone else to do it. He gets angry for seeing things he doesn't understand. It happens to all of us. After many attempts at something unknown, we get frustrated. Thats exactly what happens. He doesn't understand why others can't get through it the way he did. Thats fine. That is exactly why he asked. Reading from previous stories a lot of professional help was mentioned, but what does that mean exactly? I think that is what this person is looking for. Answers to how other people got through it.
I feel anger and sadness when i see someone going trough depression. I just want to say man the fuck up and show them what you are made of and never accept defeat. You are missing out on so many beautiful things that you also deserve to have.
Sorry I snapped at words I've been hearing over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over my entire life
Very sad turn of events.
just saw this tweet a few minutes ago,and it hits like a hammer.
Very sad turn of events.
just saw this tweet a few minutes ago,and it hits like a hammer.
Yep and it drive me nuts. He is out of the "circle", knowing and saying is out of it, and he said a stupid thing. Some are in the circle, can explained it to him (like he asked) and let him join the circle, but they decided to let him out and making him speechless. It is disgusting.Posts like yours are exactly the reason why some people here find issue with moderation, you just want their head on the platter because he said this one silly thing while completely ignoring the rest of his message.
Almost like someone who has difficulty doing these things might have a mental illnesswe have ample time to collect our thoughts and explain to them WHY you are so sick of hearing it instead of asking for their head.
Sorry I promise to man up and not let those posts get to me againYep and it drive me nuts. He is out of the "circle", knowing and saying is out of it, and he said a stupid thing. Some are in the circle, can explained it to him (like he asked) and let him join the circle, but they decided to let him out and making him speechless. It is disgusting.
You're asking a question where the answer is based on an almost infinite amount of variables. There are so many different factors involved with how people deal with mental health issues or just life in general.I can understand that everybody has a different story, but what are the contributing factors? Maybe you are right, and i can not understand it because i don't feel that way. Yes the hurt and pain is there, but i process and coop with it differently. Is it then will or willpower, or no self worth?
Whatever...Sorry I promise to man up and not let those posts get to me again
Very sad turn of events.
just saw this tweet a few minutes ago,and it hits like a hammer.
We're never going to reach where you want to go. That's just how society is. You can only keep teaching and helping others as you can.Man up = men aren't allowed to heal from their wounds we repress them and pretend they aren't there instead!
Man we have a loooonnnnnnnnnnnnmnng way to go.
Yep and it drive me nuts. He is out of the "circle", knowing and saying is out of it, and he said a stupid thing. Some are in the circle, can explained it to him (like he asked) and let him join the circle, but they decided to let him out and making him speechless. It is disgusting.
Bingo. Theres a handful who care overshadowed by a mass thats just mad about modsBad faith arguers: Mods are too insensitive to mental health issues
Mods ban user who tell those who are depressed to "man up." A highly douchey thing to say.
Bad faith arguers: Wow that guy didn't deserve to be banned. Mods are being tyrants.
I KNEW it would come to this. I knew it wasn't a concern for mental health awareness. It's just taking vengeful piss swipes at Era.
Not singling you out but I get it, I still hear this almost daily from people in my life. It's still unfortunately one of the most common canned phrases people use, along with the timely classics of "just go outside" and "just go out and meet people". The vast majority of people never have to actively question these things, which is great for them obviously but means they come across as insensitive without realising it. It may seem like common sense to us, but people come from all sorts of backgrounds and this is far from commonPeople jumping to the defense of that post need to realize that if you want to talk about mental health, you can't be that insensitive.
Bad faith arguers: Mods are too insensitive to mental health issues
Mods ban user who tell those who are depressed to "man up." A highly douchey thing to say.
Bad faith arguers: Wow that guy didn't deserve to be banned. Mods are being tyrants.
I KNEW it would come to this. I knew it wasn't a concern for mental health awareness. It's just taking vengeful piss swipes at Era.
You're being reductive. They said something shitty but the post was insightful regarding their experience. It's not any less valid. It didn't deserve a ban in my opinion.Bad faith arguers: Mods are too insensitive to mental health issues
Mods ban user who tell those who are depressed to "man up." A highly douchey thing to say.
Bad faith arguers: Wow that guy didn't deserve to be banned. Mods are being tyrants.
I KNEW it would come to this. I knew it wasn't a concern for mental health awareness. It's just taking vengeful piss swipes at Era.
What about those of us who stated the former but not the latter? In fact I think that him saying that and being supported by so many to the point that the mods backtracked is evidence that there's a problem.Bad faith arguers: Mods are too insensitive to mental health issues
Mods ban user who tell those who are depressed to "man up." A highly douchey thing to say.
Bad faith arguers: Wow that guy didn't deserve to be banned. Mods are being tyrants.
I KNEW it would come to this. I knew it wasn't a concern for mental health awareness. It's just taking vengeful piss swipes at Era.
You mean people aren't being upset that the mods are taking their advice?
What!? It was a post at an attempt to learn from people who have experienced mental health issues. How fucking dare you label me a "bad faith arguer" because I don't think a person should be banned for trying to understand people like ME a little bit better. No one is defending the term Man Up, in fact we're universally against that term, we're defending his right to ask a genuine question in a civil environment. You are the worst kind of person to try and defend MY plight. Piss off.Bad faith arguers: Mods are too insensitive to mental health issues
Mods ban user who tell those who are depressed to "man up." A highly douchey thing to say.
Bad faith arguers: Wow that guy didn't deserve to be banned. Mods are being tyrants.
I KNEW it would come to this. I knew it wasn't a concern for mental health awareness. It's just taking vengeful piss swipes at Era.
I don't see in my post where I am saying people are not allowed to be upset. They are allowed to feel whatever they feel, like everyone else in the world.People are allowed to be upset when others say things that upset them. Sure banning was probably the wrong course of action but saying "man up" in a thread about a young man who has killed themselves is going to hurt others. The people calling for bans need to be more thoughtful and not make snap judgements but at the same time your post isn't helping matters either.
It wasn't steviejd1's words.Yeah I guess telling a depression sufferer they should get over it is douchey. Guess thats one word for it
Because it's not that simple, and even if someone "man ups" they usually just repress those feelings and it comes back even worse in the future because you've never actually dealt with the issue.Honest question, because i do not know much about the subject of mental illness. How is it that one has a fighting spirit and hope and another get broken and defeated.
In short, don't feel like writing a novel:
I have been living on my own since i was 16 (37 now), my father abused my mother when i was a baby (father was oke in my teens, but then died when i was 18). My Mother has always been distanced because she missed her own childhood always gone to work or with friends. I have been to prison, been stabbed and been hurt a lot emotionally and have hurt a lot of people also. From being alone across sea in a foreign country with not even 1 cent to my name to the passing away of an stillborn. And lets not talk about racism because i am mixed, that they see my name and have a job interview and see me and all of a sudden no job available anymore. To losing all my friends and family, to a couple of years of alcohol and drug abuse A lot of shit has happened.
But i never and never once thought about suicide or giving up or going to that dark place. I always kept fighting and kept hope that i did not deserve this life. I have been lonely and questioned why do these things happen to me. But i always told myself it is just a matter if time and keep going and survive. Now i am a manager at an energy company i have a caring loving wife and 3 beautiful kids and no more debt and i am living a very good life. I have a good relationship again with my mother and family and i feel so loved. And looking and feeling good if i may say so myself and working out in the gym 4 days a week. I would have missed all these thing if i gave up and i am so blessed now. I feel anger and sadness when i see someone going trough depression. I just want to say man the fuck up and show them what you are made of and never accept defeat. You are missing out on so many beautiful things that you also deserve to have. Are my feelings unreasonable? Because i do not want to offend anyone, i just want to understand.