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Number of past intimate partners.

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mentok15

mentok15

Member
Dec 20, 2017
7,315
Australia
Do people still care about this?

Drunkenly talking with a group of friends last night and this came up and a few had some negative opinions of having too many. I was surprised as we're all pretty progressive, the age range was mid 20s to early 30s, and no one was religious. I didn't think it was much of a concern for this demographic anymore, or I'm I just out of touch?
 
Rosebud

Rosebud

Two Pieces
Member
Apr 16, 2018
43,599
For people it's bad if you have many and it's bad if you have just a few (or none).

Someone please make a guide about how many you should have at every age.
 
Cation

Cation

The Fallen
Oct 28, 2017
3,603
Lmfao I thought I clicked gaming forums and saw this at the top - so I was thinking why do people care about how many gaming co-op friends I have lol
 
leap that wall

leap that wall

Banned
Jul 18, 2020
914
mentok15 said:
Do people still care about this?

Drunkenly talking with a group of friends last night and this came up and a few had some negative opinions of having too many. I was surprised as we're all pretty progressive, the age range was mid 20s to early 30s, and no one was religious. I didn't think it was much of a concern for this demographic anymore, or I'm I just out of touch?
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It's ingrained in western culture, it's harder to keep down while you're drunk. Rationally it's irrelevant, but when you're drunk it's a talking point when it's mentioned out of the blue. Don't worry too much about being out of touch, it's just one of those things.
 
OP
OP
mentok15

mentok15

Member
Dec 20, 2017
7,315
Australia
Chance Hale said:
It's straight up not something I ever talk about lol

And no one ever asks personally as of late 20s
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Everyone was very drunk lol, only reason it came up.

leap that wall said:
It's ingrained in western culture, it's harder to keep down while you're drunk. Rationally it's irrelevant, but when you're drunk it's a talking point when it's mentioned out of the blue. Don't worry too much about being out of touch, it's just one of those things.
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When these discussions come up online in progress space no one cares, I was just under the assumption that carried over to real life.
 
RedStep

RedStep

Avenger
Oct 27, 2017
2,652
It's been discussed as a general topic but yeah, I haven't met anybody that really cared in a long, long time. There are some tinges of jealousy that creep up when there's a big disparity but it seems to dissipate pretty quickly once all parties realize that it doesn't really mean much.
 
Kopite

Kopite

Member
Oct 28, 2017
6,025
It's something I'm a bit insecure about as I'm on the lower end of the spectrum. Makes me feel guilty when I think about it too as I'm in a loving long term relationship with someone with even less experience
 
JaseMath

JaseMath

Member
Oct 27, 2017
9,387
Denver, CO
Kopite said:
It's something I'm a bit insecure about as I'm on the lower end of the spectrum. Makes me feel guilty when I think about it too as I'm in a loving long term relationship with someone with even less experience
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Again, this legitimately doesn't matter. It doesn't define who you are as a person, lover, or anything else. Give it zero attention.
 
Dice

Dice

Member
Oct 25, 2017
22,365
Canada
2528-jpg.jpg


Everyone is a virgin at one point. However many find people to do it with is their business. All this stuff is what it is and shouldn't matter really. 🤷‍♀️
 
Khanimus

Khanimus

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
40,212
Greater Vancouver
Aside from the fact that it ain't nobody's business and doesn't mean shit, as others have mentioned, it's also a metric that is used historically in very one-sided ways in-regards to gender dynamics.

Namely, some kind of point of pride for men, yet used to demean or slut-shame women.
 
BasilZero

BasilZero

Member
Oct 25, 2017
36,348
Omni
Yes

Well when it comes to friends or acquaintances - its whatever

But if you are looking towards a relationship like marriage, I believe its vital info especially in certain cultures.

As for me, I didnt have a single intimate relationship with anyone because my goal was focused on education and getting money/a job and then romance after that.
 

Deleted member 64609

Banned
Mar 18, 2020
2,434
mentok15 said:
Everyone was very drunk lol, only reason it came up.


When these discussions come up online in progress space no one cares, I was just under the assumption that carried over to real life.
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Of course people care, media burns it into you from a very young age. It's just a question of whether you snap out of it later.

And you should know better than to use online spaces as measures of reality. I've seen threads where people said 80 partners by college was nothing or not enough
 
OP
OP
mentok15

mentok15

Member
Dec 20, 2017
7,315
Australia
Labor said:
And you should know better than to use online spaces as measures of reality. I've seen threads where people said 80 partners by college was nothing or not enough
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I generally know not too, it's just the group wasn't a random sample of the population.
And lol at 80 before collage, and I was embarrassed last night by my number.
 
Sanka

Sanka

Banned
Feb 17, 2019
5,778
Many definitely do for women. Don't know if it has ever been a bad thing to have too many partners for men. So the double standard still persists.
 
Viewt

Viewt

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,806
Chicago, IL
It matters to the extent that it matters to you, I guess. To me, it never mattered when I was single and meeting women. And now that I'm married and long since outta the game, even less so.
 
Dragon Puncher

Dragon Puncher

Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,336
People really shouldn't care, but people will be people. Personally I do not give a shit.

And I will say the best sex usually doesn't come before you've been with someone bit and learned what makes each other tick.
 
Compbros

Compbros

Member
Oct 30, 2017
5,406
It's still very much a thing as women, for some, still need to be "virtuous" otherwise how can they expect someone to "wife" them. I've gotten into many discussion with my friends about it as I don't care if you've had 5 partners or 50 but others think even 5 is pushing it.

Have sex with who you want when you want as long as you both consent and it's legal.
 
Senator Toadstool

Senator Toadstool

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
16,651
I don't care. And I've had enough. Not too many in 2020 and 2021 tho for obvious reasons.

I think people who care about "too many" typically are insecure. As long as you've been safe and tested why would I care if you want to hook up with me? I see that as a compliment.
 
Feign

Feign

Member
Aug 11, 2020
2,505
<-- Coast
I wouldn't be able to tell you and I haven't even slept with that many people. It shouldn't matter. Especially now that hookup apps are fairly standard lol.
 
Siggy-P

Siggy-P

Avenger
Mar 18, 2018
11,865
One of those things where what people claim to think and what they think in a void doesnt quite always match up with their actual emotions in their animal brain irl. (Talking about OP's friends here, not any particular poster).

Might be a tinge of jealously. Might be assumptions they won't say. Unfair but that is what peoples braisn often do in the moment.
 
Soapbox Killer

Soapbox Killer

Member
Oct 28, 2017
27,133
This is going to sound like horseshit to a lot of people but a long time ago I was told that the energy you share from sex will last with a person for about 6 months after they're last encounter and if you mix too many energies of different people you can start to have conflicts in ones spirit.
 
Aprikurt

Aprikurt

▲ Legend ▲
Member
Oct 29, 2017
18,782
Don't ask, don't tell. With the girl I'm currently dating she doesn't want to know and neither do I. Wouldn't be a big deal if I found out, but it's such a childish question. Changes literally nothing.
 
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