Sure and I agree, things are confusing based on that.
Microsoft's Dante (the dev kit) is more powerful than Anaconda, this is typical, as you give devs the kitchen sink and ship a subset of that hardware. From what i have seen, the dev kit matches the CPU/GPU but things like RAM, and ports are different. Anaconda will have a smaller amount of RAM but I dont think it's locked down yet as they wait to see how performance shakes out across the industry.
To go from 12 to 16 gb of ram is trivial at this point, or to go from 16 to 32 etc can be done but will come down to cost. So what I believe is happening, they are weighing out Sony's options and pricing RAM and storage etc (still expecting full solid state, likely of the NVME flavor) to make sure they are significantly more expensive than the PS5 but they also want that crown of highest performing device.
It's a bit like poker, Microsoft wants to, at minimum, match the PS5 but in reality, is trying to have better specs at the end of the day. But with neither company playing their cards fully yet, we don't quite know.
Remember, the base features, CPU/GPU are both coming from AMD, so raw features for those parts will be similar but will come down to thinks like clock speed, cooling, and software optimization.