Married ERA - how much did you spend on an engagement ring?

[Perfect Chaos]

Like $300? Wasn't even an issue of affordability, more that neither of us really see the value in a piece of jewelry. I was actually going to spend a good bit more, but she insisted I keep it cheap. It's also emerald, not diamond. Again, she insisted.

Neither of us are big on pomp and ceremony, though. We're going to get married at the courthouse in spring and have a small dinner with our family. We've been together 5 years now.

 

[Jellycrackers]

I think we spent like ~300 each for both our rings. We were both working the same $9/hour part time job when we got engaged, plus we're both quite practical.

 

[CerealKi11a]

Lexus December To Remember Event...

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Lmao if I surprised my wife with a $60K car she would kill me.

 

[Adder7806]

Zero dollars. Total waste of money. She bought a new mountain bike instead.

 

[linkboy]

$80

I bought my wife a Moissanite ring from Amazon.

She absolutely loves it and we made sure her wedding ring works with it.

We got our wedding rings from JCPenny's since my wife worked there in jewelry at the time and got a nice discount.

 

[HamSandwich]

Good timing, I'm going to propose today. I spent about 4k on the ring and the band together. Went with a lab diamond, we both thought that would be best. Finding a good diamond is a bit of a rabbit hole, there's a lot to learn. We both went ring shopping together and tried quite a few. I really liked this approach and would recommend it unless you're really intent on keeping it a surprise.

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Good luck to you! After reading some of the replies in this thread, I thought maybe I should take her along. Unfortunately most of the jewelry places in this area are at the mall and she hates going there lol

 

[Keywork]

About 4K. The main cost of it was that the band was pure platinum as my wife is allergic to nickel. She also wanted a topaz for her stone. I had luckily come into 8K from my grandmother as she had a life insurance plan payout and divided the money between all the grandkids. So I was able to get the more expensive engagement and wedding bands.

 

[lt519]

Here's a great primer if you want to get technical on buying it:

Ultimate Diamond Buying Guide 2023

This Ultimate Diamond Buying Guide will cover all of the materials you should consider before buying a diamond in 2022.

www.pricescope.com

They explain really well, with pictures, and provide suggestions on how cuts, depth, all matter. For example these are all 1 carat diamonds:

 

[Trouble]

A little over 2K all said and done. She would probably be horrified that I spent that much, she's not a big spender.

 

[SpottieO]

My wife had her ring custom designed, it was expensive… but she's happy and I could afford it so whatever. 🤷🏽‍♂️

 

[CerealKi11a]

Here's a great primer if you want to get technical on buying it:

Ultimate Diamond Buying Guide 2023

This Ultimate Diamond Buying Guide will cover all of the materials you should consider before buying a diamond in 2022.

www.pricescope.com

They explain really well, with pictures, and provide suggestions on how cuts, depth, all matter. For example these are all 1 carat diamonds:

Click to shrink...

The four Cs: cut, clarity, color, and carat!

 

[Shadybiz]

$150. We had discussed it, and she thinks expensive engagement rings are pointless. Phew.

 

[Barrel Cannon]

Under 1.5K. I got hooked up by a coworker whos' family owns a jewelry store. I helped my coworker a lot over the years to get out of some tough spots so he basically did an under the table deal for me for all the times I've helped him out. My budget was 5K so I'm pretty happy. I personally don't think a diamond is necessary and the cut/placement style matter way more.

 

[modernlifeisANDY]

$525. Used her birth stone, an aquamarine, instead of a diamond. White gold band.

 

[adj_noun]

Zero dollars. Total waste of money. She bought a new mountain bike instead.

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best purchase ITT so far tbh

 

[Dogstar]

Not much at all, as my proposal was spontaneous, and therefore I didn't have a ring, so my wife chose her own and as she hates glitzy stuff, she chose a simple silver ring, with a labradorite stone.... I think it cost £60. We did get married in a 16th century castle though, but even that was cheap, as the owner hadn't cottoned on to the whole wedding extortion thing at the time.

I honestly think it's not worth spending money on all this stuff, unless you have money to burn, as there are far more important things as you start life together... The huge sums spent on weddings is insane. I think the average in the UK is 20+k which is ridiculous. Keep it simple and meaningful.

 

[Darryl M R]

You should have an open conversation about engagement rings and go shopping together. It may sound weird but truthfully it is quite common. No need to listen to any rule like 3x your monthly salary.

But to answer your question,

Spoiler

a little under 20k. I proposed with her dream ring and we both agreed that we did not want a wedding.

 

[DJ_Lae]

Nothing - we didn't get one.

Spent a few hundred on wedding bands instead.

 

[CitizenVectron]

Looking to propose to my gf of 5 years within the next few weeks. I've been wanting to do this for a while, but major life changes always scare me lol. Finally I've decided to get off my butt and do something about it.

I've been looking around different places and I've seen stuff like "3 months salary", which imo sounds completely made up and complete BS. I have been thinking around the range of $1.5-3k. She doesn't want to have a wedding and would rather save for a house, which leads me to believe that she won't want something too expensive. Her tastes are very similar to mine as well, old fashion, minimalistic, etc.

I know I probably should discuss this with her, but I really want it to be a surprise. This whole process seems overwhelming to me.

Thanks!

In b4 $3.50.

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Perhaps a suggestion, to do something similar to what I did—talk to your gf about marriage, and make sure she's into the idea. If she is...let her pick out the ring (unless she indicates she wants the surprise). In our case, my wife and I picked out the ring together online (Etsy) and spent about $600 CAD ($400 USD). She knew I was going to propose, but the timing and method were a surprise.

Just a thought!

 

[Bossking]

Bought a birthstone ring for like $30 and a silver wedding band from Walmart for roughly the same price.

Been married for about 10 years now.

 

[Alric]

Around $50. It was tungsten steel with an entrancement. Did an ocean marriage so wanted something that wouldn't rust or matter much if a fish stole it.

 

[pokeystaples]

Hers was $297.94 and I think mine was under $50. That doesn't include the engraving. Neither of us have lost our rings and we're still married.

 

[skeptem]

Too much. At the time we were young and felt like it was the right purchase. I think it was like 5-6k for the ring and the bands.

These days, we both agree it was dumb and she would have loved a monsanite ring just as much and not worried about it as much.

 

[lt519]

I used a similar jeweller, Taylor & Hart in London, and comparing diamonds became my min/maxing obsession for a short while.

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Yup, I looked at a lot of clarity charts and settled on something I knew I could hide with a prong, etc. Was a fun little project for a while.

Compared to having a few options in a single store versus thousands online, it was much easier to go with an online seller. I didn't feel comfortable at my local mom & pop place either, they explained a lot of the ratings but they went so fast it was hard to digest.

 

[HamSandwich]

Perhaps a suggestion, to do something similar to what I did—talk to your gf about marriage, and make sure she's into the idea. If she is...let her pick out the ring (unless she indicates she wants the surprise). In our case, my wife and I picked out the ring together online (Etsy) and spent about $600 CAD ($400 USD). She knew I was going to propose, but the timing and method were a surprise.

Just a thought!

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Oh she definitely is, we've been having the discussion for quite a bit now (to the point where we've already decided "yeah its time" haha).

 

[Deleted member 70788]

I was young and we didn't have a lot. I think the first one was $1300?

This year we celebrated a big milestone and her tastes have changes, so I had a custom one made with a lot of cool features from a local artist. I think it was $2.3K?

She rarely buys fancy things. I can't imagine wanting to spend more than about $3k though after seeing the options. And we make good money.

 

[The Albatross]

I didn't spend 3mos salary.

I think I spent about $6500 back a while ago, which was expensive, but got what my wife wanted for style.

 

[Nigel Tufnel]

$150

 

[Genesius]

Around $4K, which I definitely couldn't afford at the time, but don't regret.

 

[fracas]

I just bought a really pretty moonstone engagement ring off Etsy for like $80. I can't imagine spending more than a couple hundred bucks on a piece of jewelry and thank goodness my girlfriend feels the same.

Not knocking anyone who splurged on a ring but I'd much rather spend that few grand on the best honeymoon imaginable instead of a ring.

 

[TooBusyLookinGud]

$700, no diamonds. It was a very unique art piece that was made locally and we bought it. The artist resized it for us and that was that. I don't think he made another ring after that either.

Edit:
The engagement ring was the wedding ring.

 

[deimosmasque]

$50 on Etsy.

My partner didn't want a diamond, instead they wanted a pearl.

And even then we both stop wearing our wedding bands 3 years into our marriage and bought new ones.

 

[Daingurse]

I paid about $1800 for a Princess Diana style sapphire ring.

 

[SwampBastard]

~$2200 in 2009.

 

[Luke_wal]

Proposed in 2019, spent $3k. We were also fairly young and didn't have a ton of money, and I had a friend whose cousin made jewelry, so he made it custom for us. I think if I'd paid retail, it probably would've been 4 or 5? But as long as it's something she wants, and something she's going to look at and it will make her happy, you've bought the right thing. You don't have to spend a ton of money to get that, either.

 

[Ramathevoice]

500€. How? We shopped for rings that weren't labeled "engagement". Ethically-sourced gold and stones too. Not diamonds obvs because fuck that racket.

 

[Deleted member 13328]

My ring cost roughly 80$ and hers 90$.

Another thread that shows how poor I am haha.

 

[Maligna]

Like $300 for her engagement ring. Our weddings rings were like $150 each.

We later pawned them because we weren't wearing them. (We both hate wearing jewelry on our hands)

 

[GeorgePBurdell]

Around 6k for the engagement ring and another 2k for the matching wedding ring.

 

[Darren Lamb]

Around 3k or so, she wanted something nice but subtle, and that wouldn't break the bank since we were still planning on doing a wedding. Got it from Bario Neal in NYC

 

[Adam_Roman]

Just proposed a couple weeks ago, and I spent around $1100 on her ring. I'm a little worried about the wedding band because we're gonna do something custom that kind of wraps around the one side of the engagement ring.

 

[Kill3r7]

Buy what you can afford. IMO the money is better spent on a vacation or even as a down payment towards a home. Obviously different people like different things and have different priorities.

 

[thewilddeadhero]

$0. Actions are worth more to us than jewelry. That said, we did get matching ceramic rings lined with koa wood and opal for the odd occasion when we can use it.

 

[loco]

Buy what you can afford. IMO the money is better spent on a vacation or even as a down payment towards a home. Obviously different people like different things and have different priorities.

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I agree but its not always about affording things. You can be rich as hell and still think that anything over a couple hundred bucks is out of the question. But to your point priorities and whats important varies from person to person.

 

[Devilgunman]

If I remembered correctly, around $2,500.

 

[Worldres]

2k CAD for the white gold diamond engagement ring and the wedding band. I got it on a cyber Monday sale from a chain jeweler and the whole thing bit me in the ass in the end because the salespeople lied to me about the piece, but that's a long story. I usually shop family-owned, but my special lady fell in love with a Disney branded one. I like stones, so we will probably do moissanite for me. It seems like custom ring comissions start around 2k, so that is our target for mine.

It is nice to spend very little on it if jewelry doesn't matter much to you, but the nuance is that if you want something that will last decades or more, or a unique piece with personal meaning, you're going to have to spend some money. Diamonds are a massive scam, yes, but you still want to get something that will last, like diamonds or moissanite- on a budget, cubic zirconia should last awhile (any stone under a hardness of 8 should not be worn every day because it will not last). Fairly sure that 10k is the most durable gold and anything above that is essentially bragging rights - there should be other durable metals, but just make sure they can be safely cut in an emergency. Stuff like Sterling Silver will just get covered in scratches very quickly.

TLDR, I think 2k is a decently fair price for something that should last you decades at least.

 

[master15]

There is no right or wrong answer. I recently went through this whole process and am in final stages of creating a custom engagement ring for my Girlfriend and proposing.

As this was a long time coming, I asked to see what rings she liked on Instagram and we visited a handful of jewellers together. I am extremely thankful we did this because otherwise I wouldn't know where to start. Once I got idea on general design, I worked with the jeweller on my own. The one debate we had was between lab and mined diamonds. I personally was in favour of the former but she put sentimental value on a mined diamond and that's what I ultimately chose.

While I don't particularly want to disclose price I ended up getting 2.25, E, VS1 diamond. Again it will come down to what you want as a couple and your priorities.

 

[sHitman]

340€ on a handmade golden ring with a conflict free ruby placed inside. She still wears it everyday together with her wedding ring.

 

[RedNalgene]

I proposed with her grandmother's engagement ring. We then took it to the family jeweler and worked on a custom design using the stone from her grandmother's ring. My wife got a design she loves, and one that fits her hand well. I think it was like $5k all in, but we had the main diamond already (we added two stones on the side so it upped the price). She loves it, and got exactly what she wanted. You don't NEED to have the exact ring to propose.

But if you do, I'd recommend using either Blue Nile or James Allen. I actually ordered a different engagement ring from James Allen the day before my sister in law offered to give me her grandmother's ring. It was 0 hassle to return the ring I bought from them. Literally no questions asked - just ship it back to them and they refund your money. It's a good way to have that insurance policy if she wants something different.

 

[Dr. Mario]

€400.

Which was more expensive than our wedding rings, since we mail ordered those. Jewelry is mostly a scam (the material cost is like 1% of the price), people never glance at the ring more than once, and Africans get murdered for the decadence. Yall Americans are craycray with your 3 times your salary baloney, in my very humble opinion.