[January 20] AP: Golfer Justin Thomas to go on training program after homophobic slur, says "I’m trying to figure out — why it was in there."

[Deleted member 3812]

AP has reported that golfer Justin Thomas who was heard uttering a homophobic slur during a golf match is entering a training program and said "It's not a word I use, ... I'm trying to figure out — why it was in there.":

Thomas to go on training program after anti-gay slur (apnews.com)

January 20, 2021

Justin Thomas intends to go through an individual training program to "become a better person" after he was picked up uttering a homophobic slur under his breath when he missed a putt at a tournament in Hawaii this month.

Clothing brand Ralph Lauren ended its long-time sponsorship with Thomas following the incident two weeks ago which the No. 3-ranked American golfer described as "humiliating and embarrassing and it's not me."

Thomas has spoken to his other sponsors — Titleist, FootJoy and global bank Citi are among those listed on his official website — and hopes they will stand by him as he looks to educate himself and restore his reputation.

"It's not a word I use," Thomas said Wednesday, referring to the slur he blurted out when missing a 5-foot par putt on the fourth hole of Sentry Tournament of Champions, "but for some reason it was in there and that's what I'm trying to figure out — why it was in there.

"And like I said, it's going to be part of this process and training program, whatever I need to do, not only to prove to myself but to prove to my sponsors and prove to the people who don't know who I am that that is indeed not the person I am."

Pushed on the training program he intends to follow, Thomas said he would be keeping it "at a personal level."

"Obviously people are going to be a part of that process," he said. "But what I'm doing I'd like to keep internally and just go through the appropriate steps to get where I need to be and want to be, so people understand that's not the person I am, the character I like to portray."

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[Euphoria]

"Not who I am." Is a common theme here.

"Don't know why it was in there." Lol. It was in there because you said it.

 

[Soliloquy of a Dogge]

I wonder if Tiger Woods has given him a nigga pass as well.

These golfers love to call themselves derogatory slurs they have no business using, though. First Patrick Reed and now Justin Thomas -- I'm sorry, people don't just randomly use words that aren't in their lexicon to some degree.

 

[LongDongJunon]

In where? Your venacular?

Well It was in there cuz you're a dickhole.

Mystery solved

 

[Deleted member 2802]

Training program?

How do you train not to use a word.

 

[BLEEN]

Training program?

How do you train not to use a word.

Click to shrink...

Program:

B C D E H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

This is by far one of the dumbest excuses I've ever read.

 

[ManNR]

This is an honest and open response from the guy.

Every one of us has negative traits and qualities buried within us.

As messed up as it is that he resorted to that word in the first place we should recognize the apparent soul searching he is now doing.

If he continues using words like this going forward then that is when we should hold him further to account.

Moral righteousness and elitism is the same flaw we reject in "the other side". We would do well to guard against it in ourselves.

Edit: He could have doubled down. He could have tried to hedge himself from criticism. I don't know anything about the guy but his words above.
My question for us all is how can we hope to change the world for the better if we don't believe that people can change for the better?

 

[Loud Wrong]

It's never too late to change if he's actually serious about it. Just ask Kareem Abdul Jabaar.

 

[Razmos]

I'd feel happier with an "I'm sorry that was bad of me to say, I won't use it again"

Rather than:
"This isn't me, I have no idea why that word was in my vocabulary as I would never say that!"

Its great that he's being made to go onto a course and I hope he resolves not to do it again

 

[Watchtower]

Thread's already ripping him a new asshole because "bigots gonna bigot" but I'm gonna be nice about it. Lot of folk genuinely do not believe themselves to be bigoted while still engaging in casual bigotry, hence the feeling of "finding" a slur in their vernacular. First step's admitting you have a problem, as they say.

If this "training program" is to make him sincerely introspect to better himself then I ain't gonna give him shit for it. Even if it's just for the sake of keeping sponsorships, better that than insisting he's okay.

 

[Astral Lovelace]

Yeah this doesn't sound like a case of "sorry you're offended", sounds like a genuine moment of saying something you didn't expect to hear from yourself. And rather than be all butt hurt that people call him out, sounds like he's actually going to do some introspection rather than blame everyone else for "it's just a word".

 

[gforguava]

I think this is a vastly superior response to this than what is usually put forward. It feels, as Watchtower put, like someone who doesn't see themselves as bigoted confronting their casual bigotry, which is better than the hollow "Sorry"s we usually see.

 

[MIMIC]

What the heck did he say?

EDIT: OK, found the video of him saying that ("faggot"). Why would would he say that after missing the shot? It's a slur directed at people, not an expletive like "fuck" or "damn." Anyway, I don't anything about him (or golf for that matter), but as a gay guy, it makes me cringe that he used it like that. Surely he hurls it around even more liberally. His apology? Eh....again, I don't know him so I have no idea whether it's sincere or not.

 

[Hrodulf]

Why would he even say that after he missed a putt? Makes no sense.

Either way, even taking Freudian slips into account, you aren't typically going to say things that you don't normally use in regular conversation. "I don't use that word" is horseshit.

 

[Scarlet Spider]

Didn't we just have some lady go to some training camp yesterday for using the r word? Fucking hell.

 

[BlackGoku03]

Better than the normal, low effort responses to this type of thing.

What the heck did he say?

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Yes. This.

 

[shadowsdarknes]

I think people in sports often forget they can be heard or people can read their lips.

While you're muttering it alone on the putting green, people may be able to hear or read your lips.

It's not the equivalent to a private thought in your head when you actually say the word.

 

[Mentok]

I'd feel happier with an "I'm sorry that was bad of me to say, I won't use it again"

Rather than:
"This isn't me, I have no idea why that word was in my vocabulary as I would never say that!"

Its great that he's being made to go onto a course and I hope he resolves not to do it again

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This is my take as well. I mean the whole "I have no idea why..." really? Like just out of the blue, that word popped into your head, even though it has no correlation to the act you were performing? How does a word that's not in your vocabulary come up on a missed putt? Just say it was terrible, you're sorry and you seek to be better.

 

[Mammoth Jones]

Yeah this doesn't sound like a case of "sorry you're offended", sounds like a genuine moment of saying something you didn't expect to hear from yourself. And rather than be all butt hurt that people call him out, sounds like he's actually going to do some introspection rather than blame everyone else for "it's just a word".

Click to shrink...

A training program? That's not who I am? That shit is so disingenuous and it frames the incident as something he had no direct agency over and has to go figure out how/why when he already knows.

Just apologize, shut the fuck up, and never say that shit again lol.

 

[Ra]

Better than the normal, low effort responses to this type of thing.

Yes. This.

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Called himself the F-word after he missed a short putt.

 

[shadowsdarknes]

Oddly enough, the context of the use of the word doesn't even make sense.

Unless he's personifying the golf ball.

Saying "Fuck" would make a lot more sense.

 

[Lord Azrael]

What, did he get possessed by a civil war era ghost? Cut the bullshit

 

[Astral Lovelace]

A training program? That's not who I am? That shit is so disingenuous and it frames the incident as something he had no direct agency over and has to go figure out how/why when he already knows.

Just apologize, shut the fuck up, and never say that shit again lol.

Click to shrink...

A lot of bigots don't know, realize, or accept they are a bigot.

Man gets heated, brain searches for thing linked to anger, uses slur -- woah, hold up, why is *that* what my brain came up with?
And I'm not saying that it's the first time he's used a slur as an expletive, but maybe it's so infrequent that he hasn't had to confront the idea that him using comes from a shitty place.
Man has "Am I the bad guy?" moment, decides he needs to do some introspection.

It's really not that far fetched. People are not binary good or bad.

Oddly enough, the context of the use of the word doesn't even make sense.

Unless he's personifying the golf ball.

Saying "Fuck" would make a lot more sense.

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I mean, I personify things all the time when I'm frustrated, I think it's quite common. "Oh you little piece of shit" to a broken screw, etc.

 

[UltimateHigh]

I don't buy it's not a word he regularly uses or crosses his mind.

all I can say is to genuinely be better but I have my doubts.

 

[Razmos]

This is my take as well. I mean the whole "I have no idea why..." really? Like just out of the blue, that word popped into your head, even though it has no correlation to the act you were performing? How does a word that's not in your vocabulary come up on a missed putt? Just say it was terrible, you're sorry and you seek to be better.

Click to shrink...

Yep totally agreed. It doesn't come up in my angry heated moments because I would never and have never used the word even in jest to fellow gays

 

[DOT_mjo]

Why it was in where?! His brain?!

 

[ascii42]

Training program?

How do you train not to use a word.

Click to shrink...

 

[BlackGoku03]

Called himself the F-word after he missed a short putt.

Click to shrink...

Yuck. I used to say the word too but worked on myself to remove it from my vocabulary. Hope he does the same.

And he knows why the word was in his head... a lot of people quit saying it but I wonder how many wrestled with themselves to figure why they say it in the first place. For me, it was the usual masculinity thing a lot of teenage boys like to embody.

 

[Peebs]

This is an honest and open response from the guy.

Every one of us has negative traits and qualities buried within us.

As messed up as it is that he resorted to that word in the first place we should recognize the apparent soul searching he is now doing.

If he continues using words like this going forward then that is when we should hold him further to account.

Moral righteousness and elitism is the same flaw we reject in "the other side". We would do well to guard against it in ourselves.

Edit: He could have doubled down. He could have tried to hedge himself from criticism. I don't know anything about the guy but his words above.
My question for us all is how can we hope to change the world for the better if we don't believe that people can change for the better?

Click to shrink...

Joke post? He wouldn't even take responsibility for using the word.

 

[shnurgleton]

Folks aren't testing out new vocabulary words during an interjection. Homophobic shit clearly part of his usual repertoire

 

[Darkgran]

What did he say?

 

[radioactivez0r]

"This is definitely the first time I've ever used the word, and it's so crazy it happened on camera!" Also I'm sorry, but

not only to prove to myself but to prove to my sponsors and prove to the people who don't know who I am that that is indeed not the person I am

Click to shrink...

is about losing money, the end. Myself, then the people who pay me endorsement deals, then I guess the regular folk.

But hey I hope he genuinely finds self-improvement.

 

[Huey]

Why is this so hard?

"When I think about myself, I haven't ever considered myself to be homophobic or bigoted, but obviously there is a part of me that is and it is clearly something I have to reckon with. *Comment on where you think this could have come from in your life history and why it might never have been dealt with* *Comment on some kind of a plan on how you are going to try to expose it and deal with it within yourself. And then* I apologize unreservedly to the entire LGBTQ community, who have been and continue to be the victim of bigotries both open and subtle. I refuse to add to their suffering any more than I already have by my actions."

Just be a fucking human being.

 

[Deleted member 2802]

This is an honest and open response from the guy.

Click to shrink...

"humiliating and embarrassing and it's not me."

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This story was on the front page of reddit and I remembered this thread
Looks like pieces of shit have been using the "It's not me" defense since at least 2017.

Couple sent to prison for 35 years for racially abusing black eight-year-old at his birthday

Pair shouted racial slurs, threatened to kill partygoers - including children - waved Confederate flags and even pointed a shotgun, court heard

www.independent.co.uk

You say the n or f word and you can just run it back with a oh "that's not me" I mean the words came out of my mouth and you all heard it but "it's not me"

 

[ManNR]

You say the n or f word and you can just run it back with a oh "that's not me" I mean the words came out of my mouth and you all heard it but "it's not me"

Click to shrink...

I understand what you are saying and agree in large part. I've reread his apology and it is admittedly weak.

I would also make the case that your example is egregious and on a totally different level than this golfer guy's mistake.

What would you have him do instead now?
What does he need to do to prove himself to be someone who changes?
What if he truly does not want to be the person who says that word in a moment of frustration?

Maybe he does use that word all the time. Is the word in his vocabulary? Obviously.
Does he use it daily, weekly, monthly, yearly? We don't know that.
Maybe he is a piece of shit. Maybe he made the apology to protect his money (truthfully this is assured in my mind. Of course he wants to protect his money).
But we don't know that.
All we know is that he is going through sensitivity training on his own volition.

I have no desire to defend the guy. I certainly don't use that word and don't look kindly on people who do.
I'm just saying we don't know what is in his heart.

My point is that people can change for the better if they work at it and I for one want to continue to believe that. It gives me hope in this crazy world.
Maybe not this golfer guy...but maybe now that he has made this mistake and publicly owned up to it he can.

The fourth post called him a dickhole, like his singular use of the word defines him and will forever define him.
There is no chance for growth in that case and leaving someone no chances for growth is a path to radicalism.

Please recognize the pitfalls of moral elitism.

 

[Rendering...]

"It's not a word I use," the man says, after using the word.

 

[Squarehard]

 

[Deleted member 25606]

Yeah, I ain't buying this one.

 

[Deleted member 70788]

I don't know this guy or if he is sincere but I will say this.

I grew up with some horrible ways of talking being celebrated and normalized. I have learned and grown a lot and can't remember the last time I said anything like that. But it is definitely a part of me still that I have to work against. I hate it. I wish I could purge those years and replace them, but it's a demon I have to carry and actively fight against regularly.

Does it make it ok? No. Not at all. But I'd o understand a bit of the "I don't know where that came from" statement. I have no idea if it applies to this guy or not.

 

[John Rabbit]

I understand what he's trying to communicate here, but it's phrased like he's literally never encountered the word in his life.

 

[Rendering...]

I understand what you are saying and agree in large part. I've reread his apology and it is admittedly weak.

I would also make the case that your example is egregious and on a totally different level than this golfer guy's mistake.

What would you have him do instead now?
What does he need to do to prove himself to be someone who changes?
What if he truly does not want to be the person who says that word in a moment of frustration?

Maybe he does use that word all the time. Is the word in his vocabulary? Obviously.
Does he use it daily, weekly, monthly, yearly? We don't know that.
Maybe he is a piece of shit. Maybe he made the apology to protect his money (truthfully this is assured in my mind. Of course he wants to protect his money).
But we don't know that.
All we know is that he is going through sensitivity training on his own volition.

I have no desire to defend the guy. I certainly don't use that word and don't look kindly on people who do.
I'm just saying we don't know what is in his heart.

My point is that people can change for the better if they work at it and I for one want to continue to believe that. It gives me hope in this crazy world.
Maybe not this golfer guy...but maybe now that he has made this mistake and publicly owned up to it he can.

The fourth post called him a dickhole, like his singular use of the word defines him and will forever define him.
There is no chance for growth in that case and leaving someone no chances for growth is a path to radicalism.

Please recognize the pitfalls of moral elitism.

Click to shrink...

Honestly I agree that a path for growth needs to be available for people who aren't bad faith dickheads or inveterate bigots. People deserve grace when they sincerely try to better themselves.

For some, being a good person is a process. We don't choose our flaws and early influences. And being an adult doesn't mean you must accept your mistakes or blind spots as the defining features of your nature, just because you failed to perfect yourself in your youth.

 

[UltraMav]

I grew up using the word for the majority of my childhood. The people around me used it often (and probably still do). Sometime in high school I figured out it was shitty, partially thanks to the times changing and people on TV calling it out. It took a few years of me working to not use it as an insult for me to grow past it.

 

[ManNR]

I appreciate both posts above.