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I've never been able to handle any form of trash talk in multiplayer

Frustrated_Grunt

Frustrated_Grunt

Member
Oct 28, 2017
556
I've started a few multiplayer games while in quarantine, and it reminded me that I'm incapable of handling any sort of trash talk or toxicity from people I'm playing with.

There have been cases where I'm enjoying a game fully until a level of trash talk is directed at me, at which point it just breaks my drive to continue playing and ends up ruining my day. There have been occurrences where I give up on a game completely just because of one bad experience I had in one match.

I feel like how easily this affects me mentally is not normal, and I wanted to ask if you or others have had a similar problem when playing games online, and what tips you have to not let toxic experiences like this influence mental health long-term.
 
Weiss

Weiss

User requested ban
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
64,265
Hell I throw a tantrum if I get teabagged.

My ego is not ready for online play.
 
Stat

Stat

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,150
Turn off your mic.

And honestly, they are utter strangers. Don't take it personal, they don't know you.

This is from someone who doesn't enjoy trash talk either. But honestly, I haven't talked to anyone in online MP in about 5 years since Im in a party with my buddies
 
TheMadTitan

TheMadTitan

Member
Oct 27, 2017
27,179
I take and receive trash talk in real life, so the online bullshit, regardless of how excessive it got, never bothered me emotionally. Whether or not I wanted to hear it in general is a different story.

Whether you can handle it emotionally or not, my solution of just muting everyone is the same. I haven't used a headset since Warhawk was in its prime, and even then, I used it like three times.
 

Deleted member 48434

User requested account closure
Banned
Oct 8, 2018
5,230
Sydney
Same. I am but a soft insecure marshmallow.
Takes little to break me.

I barely play multiplayer, but lucky for me, the ones I did play almost never had people on voice. I never played comp modes, so that likely helped.
I never touched my own mic, either.
 
blueredandgold

blueredandgold

Member
Oct 25, 2017
5,589
Agreed, it's not just you. It's a large reason why I respect Nintendo's attitude towards online communication.

(I'll pay for this I know :D )

Overwatch (PC) is all I play really and have done for a while because of lack of time, text chat and quick play fits me like a glove.
 
Bladelaw

Bladelaw

Member
Oct 25, 2017
7,684
Frustrated_Grunt said:
I've started a few multiplayer games while in quarantine, and it reminded me that I'm incapable of handling any sort of trash talk or toxicity from people I'm playing with.

There have been cases where I'm enjoying a game fully until a level of trash talk is directed at me, at which point it just breaks my drive to continue playing and ends up ruining my day. There have been occurrences where I give up on a game completely just because of one bad experience I had in one match.

I feel like how easily this affects me mentally is not normal, and I wanted to ask if you or others have had a similar problem when playing games online, and what tips you have to not let toxic experiences like this influence mental health long-term.
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This ruined Overwatch for me so I feel you. Mute everyone if you want to play MP. My solution was to drop Multiplayer online with randoms entirely. If you can find a group to play with it can be a good experience but I'm done playing with randoms.
 
never

never

Member
Oct 28, 2017
1,832
I'm kind of the same way. I get incredibly tilted when people start trying to bully me or other people on my team. I grew up in a toxic environment and just have zero patience for that shit.

It's why unless I'm playing with friends I always turn off chat/voice. Nothing anyone has ever typed at me or said to me on voice chat has ever been constructive or helpful enough for me to want to hear all the garbage .
 
dogbox

dogbox

Member
Jan 30, 2019
1,179
Spaceball Arena
I would say don't even bother with mics or enabling voice with people you don't know. :) I feel inclined to mention Apex Legends, which has an awesome ping system that makes solo queuing quite nice!
 
Reddaye

Reddaye

Member
Mar 24, 2018
2,901
New Brunswick, Canada
I don't mind it personally, but I recommend just using the mute all function if the game(s) you're playing have it. There's a difference between some fun trash talk and people being toxic assholes. Mute the assholes, and anyone else that's bothering you.
 
Einbroch

Einbroch

Member
Oct 25, 2017
17,961
I went through a phase where I instantly muted everyone in League of Legends every game.

Now I find the best course of action is to start the dialogue first. If I engage them right when the game starts, even if it's just a meme or pointless small talk, they're way less likely to flame. Or if they do, it's way less toxic and more fun.

Oh, and when I get outplayed, I throw out a "wp" in all chat. I've never gotten flamed by an opponent if I compliment them first.
 
MnM

MnM

Alt-Account
Banned
Mar 9, 2020
1,008
Why even play multiplayer if you are not gonna trash talk?
 
808s & Villainy

808s & Villainy

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
42,700
I've always though it's a good thing Splatoon 2 doesn't have voice chat with strangers, because the shit that would be said is unimaginable
 
Walnut

Walnut

One Winged Slayer
Member
Nov 2, 2017
876
Austin, TX
Most trash talk I see on multiplayer games comes from people who usually are insecure and not very good at the game they're playing to begin with

You just have to learn to ignore it and keep doing your thing. What they say literally doesn't matter.
 
Lyre

Lyre

Alt Account
Banned
Feb 12, 2020
2,996
London
Cess007 said:
Trash talking in Rocket League has given me some of the best moments playing online. So many hilarious shit xD
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omfg yes, one game I was laughing for like five minutes after some guy missed a reallllyyyyyyyyyyyy easy save and people were spanning "what a save!" for the remainder of the match.
 
AlexBasch

AlexBasch

Member
Oct 27, 2017
7,307
It's not so much that I can't handle it, but I just can't bring myself to insult someone over a damn videogame. Like "holy shit you fucking retard, why did you charge, are you a newb or so-*mutes player*."

Apparently playing online and finding people in LFG stuff means you gotta endure and insult back other people. That's now how I engage in real life, and not sure why I'd like to hear someone insult me. I just mute them and let them talk to themselves instead.

It's why I just mute everyone in the team and assume they're hateful assholes.
 
Temascos

Temascos

Member
Oct 27, 2017
12,493
I'm more of a cooperative/supportive player so when I hear trash talk it breaks my heart. I like being a good sport, even if I lose. So when someone's lobbing shit at me I'll just leave and look for a lobby that doesn't have that player.
 
L Thammy

L Thammy

Spacenoid
Member
Oct 25, 2017
49,947
Trash talk is fun when you're friends with people, you know that they don't actually mean what they're saying, and they're saying things just to mess around with you rather than any actually genuine aggressive purpose.

Outside of that framework, trash talk is kind of the territory of assholes.
 
SarcasticRobot

SarcasticRobot

Member
Oct 27, 2017
490
I'm with ya, OP. The Apex ping system has been the best thing to happen. Before I wouldn't play any competitive team games.
 
AlexBasch

AlexBasch

Member
Oct 27, 2017
7,307
L Thammy said:
Trash talk is fun when you're friends with people, you know that they don't actually mean what they're saying, and they're saying things just to mess around with you rather than any actually genuine aggressive purpose. Outside of that framework, trash talk is kind of the territory of assholes.
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I remember in a previous thread about this in which a poster was really offended by the people who muted him because "they don't have a thick skin" to deal with trash talk. Like, I'm morally obligated to listen to his bullshit, otherwise I'm a "weak" player or something. Just play the fucking game, please?

It's the main reason I always double check to see if my chat, messaging and friend request options are disabled. I'm really burned out with the "gamer community" to think they're not hateful toxic assholes.
 
L Thammy

L Thammy

Spacenoid
Member
Oct 25, 2017
49,947
In a similar territory, 2D Mario should never be played multiplayer unless you're with a group that has mutually agreed to fuck with each other as much as possible.
 
WellbornWarrior

WellbornWarrior

Banned
Oct 27, 2017
6,348
It's not a shame to be too sensible to handle trash talk. If anything it makes you more sympathetic than those other guys with a loose tongue.

But there's a very thin line between clever insults and using straight up slurs or threats. I actually look down upon people who do the latter.
 
M. Wallace

M. Wallace

Member
Oct 25, 2017
23,038
Midwest
User banned (A week): Hostility; numerous bans for inflammatory drive-by posting
Trash talk makes the game. Get good or fuck off.
 
Neiteio

Neiteio

Member
Oct 25, 2017
24,100
Trash talk just feels gross to me. Like there's something uncomfortably psychotic about talking that way to someone you've never met. Save that stuff for people who know you and your sense of humor. Don't make things unpleasant for people who are just trying to unwind.
 
waugh

waugh

Attempted to circumvent ban with an alt-account
Banned
Feb 21, 2020
1,401
Lots of open toxicity in this thread. Maybe your friends are okay with trash talking but maybe don't pretend trash talking randos is acceptable?
 
AlexBasch

AlexBasch

Member
Oct 27, 2017
7,307
waugh said:
Lots of open toxicity in this thread. Maybe your friends are okay with trash talking but maybe don't pretend trash talking randos is acceptable?
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Nah, you know what it's cool. Sometimes the big mouths are the worse players in the entire team and you just feel bad for them. No need to trashtalk them back when they play like fucking garbage already. Plus, sometimes they are muted and they don't know, so it's just them staring at a screen and doing an unfunny rendition of AVGN.
 
DarkFlame92

DarkFlame92

Member
Nov 10, 2017
5,641
Just learn to ignore in your life. I don't get why I should break my mood because some random guy said X thing about me
 
Saiyaman

Saiyaman

Member
Dec 19, 2017
1,853
I got the same issue, don't worry. It never really bothered me much in games like Halo where the opposite team might trash talk after the game -- especially if we won.

In games when we're supposed to play as a team? I can't stand it. I remember one time in particular, maybe around 2012, someone in a Dragon Soul raid (WoW) called me a fucking retard because I didn't know the mechanics for Deathwing (I said I didn't know beforehand). When I play an MMO like WoW now I get a huge sense of performance anxiety. I fear if I make any kind of mistake, or not doing my best that I'll get chewed up.
 
Steven

Steven

Member
Oct 27, 2017
3,172
I don't really play much MP anymore, but when I did the trash talk was amazing. Especially for Gears 1.

Nothing like destroying a team and then in between the round telling those scrubs to get fucking good or "fucking disconnect you're trash" lmaoooo
 
Elfgore

Elfgore

Member
Mar 2, 2020
4,558
Literally mute them. Almost every online game I've seen has options for in-game communication via pings, voice commands. That's more than enough for non-ranked games.
waugh said:
Lots of open toxicity in this thread. Maybe your friends are okay with trash talking but maybe don't pretend trash talking randos is acceptable?
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This as well.
 
Procheno

Procheno

Alt Account
Banned
Nov 14, 2018
2,879
Trash talk ain't for everybody, but in the right environment it makes everything more hype and entertaining. Adds more stakes though some people don't appreciate the stakes as it does attack their own character when they don't want to be judged in such a fashion. Some just come to play and that's it. But if you can take it, dang is it fun to watch
 
Renna Hazel

Renna Hazel

Member
Oct 27, 2017
11,552
Lyre said:
Gears was amazing, hurl as much abuse as possible before the round starts; repeat again inbetween rounds.
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Sounds about right for my experience with Xbox Live way back when, except I didn't find it amazing. It's the reason I don't play games online much and don't mind Nintendo's approach to no communication. People just try to say the worst things possible online and it's really not fun to play with people like that. Apparently some enjoy it though.
 

Hideo GOATjima

Member
May 30, 2018
1,255
Play with friends in a party, or mute all if it's something like LoL

When I was younger I used to waste my time arguing but I have better things to do now

Oddly, trash talk doesn't tilt me, but in games where I have really poor performing teammates/myself I get tilted into oblivion, but I never get mad at them or hit objects like some wackjob streamer

I just turn off at the end of the game
 
Xevross

Xevross

Member
Oct 28, 2017
2,048
I'm the same OP, except I don't really let it get to me. Its more of a case of I assume anyone trash talking is probably not a great person who themselves gets salty super easily if they're losing, so they like to dish it out on others when they're managing to do well. Games for me are much more chill, I don't get angry if I lose and I'm just there to have fun.

I don't encounter it much anyway since I'm normally in party chat or have people muted, it just sometimes slips through or there's stuff like quick chat in rocket league and I can't help but roll my eyes when I see it. I guess some people find it fun but they don't realise they're ruining games for other people, or more likely they're idiots who are intentionally trying to ruin the game for other people.
 
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