Lost Lemurian bro you are being obtuse for no reason.
I mean, I'm pretty personally offended by many of the comments here.
I didn't say you was over 30 I said your situation is fine because you had a shot at growing into your own person. A 19 year old has not.
The Sweden thing is highly relevant since you said it was legal. That was also legal.
the states do have age of consent ranging from 16 and up. A years diff ain't that important in that case. It'll always be creepy for old ass people to shack up with teenagers.
The only thing I can find that resembles this Sweden story is an abduction and gang rape of a 15-year-old by a group of older teens boys, not old men.
So, yeah, not relevant at all, unless there's a different story that I can't find.
The issue I have isn't the gap. For me it's the idea that someone could be 18-19, possibly still in Highschool or a fresh graduate and people view it as a nonissue to be dating someone who is ~30 and old enough to be their teacher.
In your situation 26 and 35 is much different than 18-19 and 27-28. I don't know many who are the same at 26 as they were at 18-19.
You believe it's okay for a 30 year old to be taking a 18-year old to prom? It's legal right? Just turned 18 and now dating your social studies teacher. Legal right?
Context is important. The issue isn't teenagers having sex or relationships. People need to stop equating 18-19 to 28-30.
What is all this highschool talk? What 19-year-old is in highschool? Who goes to prom with someone who isn't a classmate? How is dating your teacher (a person with whom you have a very clear imbalance of power) related to this situation?
And if your major contention is "a 19-year-old isn't mature to be in a relationship" then they shouldn't even date someone their own age, right?
Your example is not an issue, because at 26 you are an adult and have some experience in the world.
For people under 21, the acceptable age gap is lower because so much development goes on in these years. Think about the huge gap in lifestyle / responsibility between 19 and 28.
Young people are also much more susceptible to predatory behavior from older, more experienced partners. Not everyone is a predator, and not every age gap relationship is unhealthy, but yes that is a real thing that happens. For this reason, it's seen as problematic and potentially a red flag when someone routinely pursues young partners.
So, people under 21 shouldn't date people over 21? I can agree that's probably good advice, but I don't think it's nearly so problematic as people are making it out to be.
I used to work with a woman who had her first son at 19 and her second at 22. And I mean I worked with her when she was pregnant, this wasn't some old lady relating a story from the 50s. Conversely, I'm trying to help a friend get out of his shell and meet someone. He's 26 and has never had a serious (or physical) relationship with anyone and still lives at home. Age doesn't equate to experience.
