Indian Matchmaking (Netflix)

[shounenka]

Anyone else of Indian extraction watching this?

Although it doesn't apply much to me today, having been married for nearly 16 years now (to a non-Indian no less), there's something so familiar about it all, especially the demands Indian parents place on their kids not only in terms of future spouse but also their career/educational track leading up to marriage age. My South Indian father was no different despite taking an American wife.

Still only on Ep. 3 but find myself nodding incessantly at a lot of its accuracy (up and down, not side to side!).

 

[hateradio]

Is it cringe? I don't know if I can handle 90 Day Fiance kind of stuff anymore.

 

[No_Style]

Fiancée and I are watching. It's a very interesting watch as Canadian born Asians.

Spoiler: Rooting for

Nadia's happiness and Aparna's growth.

 

[Deleted member 5853]

Binged through it on a weekend.

Overall, it was okay. It is rife with issues, particularly its focus on wealthy fair-looking Indians, but its entertaining and interesting.

The issues aside, I did find it interesting how the show tries to reconcile the archaic nature of arranged marriages in the modern world. Its not a thorough exploration of the topic, but I like the fact that it is something the show chooses to engage with at some level. Taking a step back, I am also happy that this show even exists. The fact that I see people and a culture who resemble me is a lot.

All in all, it's decent. Also, Vyasar, if you're a member on this forum, hit me up, fam.

 

[Aurica]

shounenka Totally OT, but what is Suzuran in the context of your avatar? Looks like a yakuza emblem kinda thing.

 

[RC.]

Maybe my mom would be interested in this.
Although being 37 and single myself, it probably wouldn't be the best the idea to introduce her to this show.

 

[Desi]

I binged the whole first season immediately. shit was wild and the characters hilarious. Aparna was driving me up the wall and Ashiya just wanted to marry his mother.

people on twitter were upset about the colorism (also height discrimination) but that is a fact of life and constantly an issue of discussion for families that do go out of their way to hire someone like the matchmaker. remove any mention of it?

 

[shounenka]

Is it cringe?

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Some reviewers definitely found it to be so. I haven't experienced it but I'm not that far into it yet.

I am also happy that this show even exists.

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This is probably the biggest thing I want to say about the show.

shounenka Totally OT, but what is Suzuran in the context of your avatar? Looks like a yakuza emblem kinda thing.

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Search "gakuran," "button," "Crows."

 

[Seesaw15]

On ep. 4. Its really cute so far.

 

[Deleted member 5853]

people on twitter were upset about the colorism (also height discrimination) but that is a fact of life and constantly an issue of discussion for families that do go out of their way to hire someone like the matchmaker. remove any mention of it?

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I wish there were more clients like Ankita or Vyasar: people who didn't fit in the mold of rich and fair.

Also, WHERE WERE THE CALIFORNIA INDIANS. Y'all got the Texas Indians, the Jersey Indians, and the India Indians, but you completely overlook the Bay Area?

 

[Aurica]

Search "gakuran," "button," "Crows."

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Oh, dope. I have barely read Crows. Thanks for the response!

 

[Sunster]

Is it cringe? I don't know if I can handle 90 Day Fiance kind of stuff anymore.

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yes but in a different way. 90 Day Fiance is cringe because of all the white western men fetishizing Asian women and thinking they can buy love from poorer countries.

 

[BearPawB]

Liked the series. Was disappointed characters were just seemingly dropped at random. As awful as Aparna was I felt invested in seeing her be awful

 

[BasilZero]

Never heard of the show , planning to get Netflix and will check it out with my wife.

people on twitter were upset about the colorism (also height discrimination) but that is a fact of life and constantly an issue of discussion for families that do go out of their way to hire someone like the matchmaker. remove any mention of it?

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Cant say much about colorism since my skin isnt too dark and was never called off on that.

But I've had weird instances where my height played a major role in getting rejected during matchmaking years ago when I was looking to get married.


Like I had one instance where I was just 1 inch taller than the girl was looking for and another where I was 1 inch shorter lol. Got rejected for that.

I'm 5'9'' btw.

During that time, I felt a bit sad but looking back , kinda funny and makes me think I dodged a couple of bullets lol.

@ shounenka - what part of South India are you from? I'm from Kerala.

 

[metalfearsolid]

Apparently, none of the couples ended up staying together from the show.

So reality TV at its finest.

 

[Desi]

It's like Dating Around to me. I just want to see the dates and the crazy. Happiness is a distant third but now I feel for Vyasar

 

[shounenka]

Apparently, none of the couples ended up staying together from the show.

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Bro! Spoilers......

@ shounenka - what part of South India are you from? I'm from Kerala.

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My father is from Hyderabad. Haven't personally been there since '84. Have OCI though, so hope to make an extended trip/stay one of these days. Maybe after my kid finishes college.

 

[infinityBCRT]

Wife and I just finished bingeing it. I think the first 5 episodes were way stronger than the last 3. I think it was the right thing to only focus on around 3 people per episode, but the people they start off with are way more interesting than the people they finished the season with. They should've interleaved the stories more throughout the season and mixed up which 3 they focused on on an episode by episode basis.

 

[a916]

It's a bit easier to watch than say 90 day fiance but it's wild to think no one made it out of that show, all the "couples" are now single.

Thought for sure Shaker and Nadia were a good match. Even the couple that had a rokh broke it off the next day.

 

[Deleted member 6173]

I need to watch this. My parents are indo Guyanese and I'm Canadian born so I'm sure I will relate to this.

 

[Crazymoogle]

I wish there were more clients like Ankita or Vyasar: people who didn't fit in the mold of rich and fair.

Also, WHERE WERE THE CALIFORNIA INDIANS. Y'all got the Texas Indians, the Jersey Indians, and the India Indians, but you completely overlook the Bay Area?

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Apparently they tracked over 500 people for the show, but as it turns out it's quite hard to find people with families willing to allow this kind of access; somebody always bails out at some point in the process.

Anyway for those who are interested, the creators of this show are also the filmmakers for the Documentary "A Suitable Girl" which not only is on the same subject - only with much poorer girls in India rather than a globetrotting US show - but they also cover the matchup for Sima's own daughter. It's also on Netflix, at least over here.

 

[Nida]

Is it cringe? I don't know if I can handle 90 Day Fiance kind of stuff anymore.

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Did you burn out on that sweet cringey goodness?

 

[oreomunsta]

I want Vyasar as a friend :3

 

[hateradio]

Did you burn out on that sweet cringey goodness?

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Not quite, but there were some other circumstances that led me to avoid the show.

 

[Pet]

Watched one episode and I'm in LOVE with Nadia. I hope she finds a wonderful partner.

 

[nopressure]

Watched two episodes with my fiance so far, it's pretty funny. She's white and fascinated by the process.

So far ther's only ultra wealthy fair-skinned Indians - hope that changes. It's interesting to see how "arranged marriages" work in modern India. I'm not convinced it will work for the Western Indians (or even this hotshot rich Indian guy).

 

[AnilP228]

Some of the toxicity in the later episodes is eye opening.

I'm British Asian and as I've gotten older I've realised how much of my life invovled being emotionally blackmailing by my mother. Watching episode 6/7 was pretty hard.

 

[shounenka]

Watched one episode and I'm in LOVE with Nadia. I hope she finds a wonderful partner.

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Yes I'm only on Ep 3 and this is who I find myself rooting for. Def the kind of girl I'd want to be buds with IRL.

I have a cousin named Aparna who is coincidently also a lawyer and got married last year. Shame it didn't work out for her TV counterpart (judging from what people have written above).

 

[antispin]

Ooo, not for me but will recommend to my SO.

 

[OG Kush]

Don't even like shows like this but watched 3 episodes yesteday. Such an easy watch and being desi too I'm happy it exists. However where are the British desi representation?!

 

[Desi]

If only Nadia want after these tall dudes. I'm a 5'5 black man ready to give it all up. Even ketchup!

 

[Pet]

Oh god I finally figured out why I was so drawn to Aparna.

She's like a female version of my husband!!!! Can I say, yikes lololol.

 

[Nero3000]

Watched it all, it was interesting...to the point i would recommend it to my mother...but im not opening that can of worms more.

 

[EternalDarko]

We're not Indian (was asked by OP), but my wife and I enjoyed this show. Though there's a real question to whether this works out at all in the modern world, try googling what happened to the the people who were matched on the show.

 

[shounenka]

We're not Indian (was asked by OP), but my wife and I enjoyed this show.

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Certainly didn't mean to imply that non-Indians shouldn't watch it or couldn't enjoy it, but as someone who is of Indian extraction, I find so much of it relatable thus far. Finishing Ep 3 and 4 tonight.

Glad to hear your wife enjoyed it as well; mine (Japanese) says she does too, which I appreciate on some odd level (even if it's a lie, but she's met enough of my relatives over the years to get the gist of it all, and the Japanese translation is serviceable enough), but I definitely find myself nodding and laughing a helluva lot more than her.

 

[shounenka]

Watched up through Ep. 5. Watching Aparna go through a series of dates with a bunch of Indian-American characitures is hilarious (with a special shoutout to the beefy cornball who gave her flowers, called them pretty "like her" and left the shop with shades on; I bet he' s in finance).

Vyasar is good people. If only he liked vidgames as much as comics; we might see him on this board.

 

[effingvic]

This show was full of cringe and the ending was extremely unsatisfying. It really felt like they just ran out of material and just ended it abruptly.

The casual discrimination and stuff going on is pretty sad but not surprising. Crazy how the girl at the very end was like "yeah someone fair, not too dark" like damn, you're educated in the US and youre gonna be on TV lol. No fucks given

 

[subpar spatula]

I think these types of shows would be way better if it challenged the status quo within these communities. Pradhyuman didn't really want a partner. He just wanted to party, work, and party, and I feel as if there's more going on off-camera to where he cannot fully express that.

 

[808s & Villainy]

I'm trying not to judge, not being from the culture, but Akshay's mom 😬
Actually, not just his mom, but him too. His first "date" with the first girl found was INCREDIBLY awkward. He's a super mommas boy

 

[brochiller]

This show was full of cringe and the ending was extremely unsatisfying. It really felt like they just ran out of material and just ended it abruptly.

The casual discrimination and stuff going on is pretty sad but not surprising. Crazy how the girl at the very end was like "yeah someone fair, not too dark" like damn, you're educated in the US and youre gonna be on TV lol. No fucks given

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It's pretty normal I think in Indian culture. My friend is on an Indian dating app his parents signed him up for and one of the main criteria to enter is the skin tone of the person you are looking for: "wheatish brown" in his case.

 

[shounenka]

It's pretty normal I think in Indian culture.

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Yeah, I think that's the key to enjoying this show without being overly critical. So much of what is being shown is, for better or worse, normal, and considerably accurate.

 

[Double 0]

My wife is Indian, I'm Nigerian, we watched it together.

Lets just say she was way less accepting about the problematic aspects of the show than people ITT are. The discrimination, the emotional blackmail, how certain people were portrayed in comparison to others (Ankita and Aparna vs Pradhyuman). She had a lot to say about that. Even I caught the colorism stuff.

We both liked Aparna. For me, she was a character and a half. For my wife, she likes seeing in her words, "difficult Indian women". Women not wiling to play ball with traditions. She got very invested in her and Vyasar.

 

[jey_16]

Apparently they tracked over 500 people for the show, but as it turns out it's quite hard to find people with families willing to allow this kind of access; somebody always bails out at some point in the process.

Anyway for those who are interested, the creators of this show are also the filmmakers for the Documentary "A Suitable Girl" which not only is on the same subject - only with much poorer girls in India rather than a globetrotting US show - but they also cover the matchup for Sima's own daughter. It's also on Netflix, at least over here.

Click to shrink...

Thanks for suggesting A Suitable Girl, watched it last night and it was fascinating. Especially seeing Sima's daughters marriage but the other stories as well

Even though Indian Matchmaker provided more laughs, this felt like a much more realistic take on arranged marriage

 

[SigmasonicX]

My sister recommended my mom to watch it. She liked the first five minutes (incidentally, that guy sitting there quietly while his mom talked about what he wanted was the realest Indian moment I've ever seen), but then got bored and had me skip through it. When she saw the first episode didn't end with a wedding, she completely dropped it, lol.

Not surprised to hear about colorism and such being a consistent issue. As someone else mentioned, no one asking for a matchmaker's help is not going to have those problems. This is rich people trash. I do admit to some happiness that Indians are getting in on this kind of reality show.

 

[Deleted member 5853]

Indian Matchmaking Is Just Telling It Like It Is

When the game itself is dirty, why yell at a mirror pointed at it, reflecting the moves for all to see?

www.vulture.com

 

[BubbaKrumpz]

My sister was watching it and the Austin Texas Teacher dude seemed nice. Hope he ended up with someone. I only caught the part where the lady said she couldn't be with him because of his income.

 

[guiloahhhhh]

Yeah fucking Vysar seems like such a cool dude. Really hope it works out for him.

Spoiler: FULL BREAKDOWN

Aparna honestly seems pretty stuck up. Just purposely sabotaging dates over small shit. Podcast dude-Oh I'm an author and wrote 3 books and am sold out everywhere for keynotes I might take a little time off. Aparna- fuck you goodbye never wanna see you again. Other guy-What's a a relaxing 10 days for you? Aparna- Why would you ask that? The fuck? Why is my life not already relaxing???

Good for her that's she independent and shit but damn you are not going to find anyone with that attitude. She seemed to say a lot of contradictory shit too. I love travelling! But I hate the beach! And everywhere I've gone has sucked! But I love the ocean! Be nice but don't talk to anyone else but me! Like Shekar talked to the fucking waiter for 5 seconds and she's upset. I feel bad for Jay lol seems like a nice guy. Aparna just seems to have issues with her life and all the pressure she put on herself to be an attorney and admittedly not even enjoying it lol.

Nadia seems too hot to ghost. Theirs been some conflicting information on the internet my friends were sending me on that on who ghosted who. Looks like she and shekar are not together either.

Ankita in Dehli is actuallly damn hot those eyes get me. Sad that she was fat shamed when she's really fucking normal just not a pogo stick.

Akshay I was suspecting would be gay lol just not interested in anyone. Hope he had a serious conversation with Radikha about shit for 5 minutes before marriage. Same thing with Pradhyuman the dude just did not want to be married yet. Totally fine honestly but familial pressure of course.

Kinda didn't like how they just moved on to different people with no wrap up. Good shit overall though. Really enjoyed it as someone who lived in India for a bit. Goes without saying the colorism/classisim is pretty sad.

 

[nopressure]

I found the show... ok. I really liked the range of families that were shown and it gives viewers an idea of what "arranged marriage" means for Indians. I was confused when the show talked about one of the girls being fat/ugly while she was clearly very pretty. Parts also felt too reality TV-esque and the final girl showing off her casual colourism left a sour taste.

I get this is "normal" for Indian culture, but it also felt gross to end the show on a happy positive vibe with a girl that's straight up racist.

 

[effingvic]

Vysar if you're on Era, what's good bro

 

[Bold One]

My wife is Indian, I'm Nigerian,

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I hope you dont mind me asking,

How did your relationship go down for both families?