I got a call from my daughter's school and I'm really not sure how to feel... (Am I just being paranoid?)

[Inugami]

So I get a call from the school office letting me know that my daughters have gifts in the office to be picked up. No name of who it's from, just a weird label that says "wish makers" and the name of my kids and their teacher and what was in the bag... No one at the office seemed to know where it came from so it's not like a lot of other kids got gifts.

I never signed up for any kind of gift exchange or delivery, and there was an extra "gift" that was a children's Bible.

I'm getting a bit paranoid, it recently came out to the school that we are atheists (everyone in my 6 year olds class was practicing for a Christmas sing along and she matter of fact told the teacher we don't celebrate Christmas and was put in a separate classroom with 3 other 1st graders who don't celebrate for one reason or another) and the timing of all this seems really suspicious...

For the record: the bag contained a Lego set, a princess doll, and a children's Bible all wrapped. The children's Bible had no name tag and was wrapped separately and was not listed on the front with the rest of the gifts.

 

[Dec]

ye, suspicious as fuck. They didn't respect your beliefs and felt like your daughters should get gifts anyways. Which is like... whatever, until they put a fucking bible in there.

 

[Deleted member 426]

I actually don't think you're being paranoid. Your child is being evangelised.

 

[1000% H]

I'm getting a bit paranoid, it recently came out to the school that we are atheists (everyone in my 6 year olds class was practicing for a Christmas sing along and she matter of fact told the teacher we don't celebrate Christmas and was put in a separate classroom with 3 other 1st graders who don't celebrate for one reason or another) and the timing of all this seems really suspicious...

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First off, what the fuck is this?

 

[Scraggs]

You should ask the school if they have surveillance footage of someone dropping off the bag. This is targeted harassment, someone is trying to pressure you into converting your kids.

 

[TacomaSCDisaster]

Christian parents overstepping their bounds into another families' life and trying to force their religion on someone else's kids? Well I never!

But seriously it's pretty shitty that whoever did that was clearly just trying to win your kids over to their religion with toys.

 

[Mirage]

The bible being included on top of what just happened that's definitely suspicious. Especially if it was only your kids that got something like that.

 

[Freezasaurus]

The gifts are one thing, but the bible would make me fucking furious.

 

[Carthago Delenda Est]

Clearly wrong but also likely fine. I wouldn't worry about it except to maybe see how your kids feel about not celebrating Christmas.

 

[TheWorthyEdge]

Holy shit. That is fucked.

 

[piratethingy]

Imagine for one second if you took it upon yourself to deliver presents and atheist reading materials to her schoolmate's kids.

 

[Hybrid Rainbow]

First off, what the fuck is this?

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? it's not uncommon for children to be placed in another classroom if they can't participate in the activity. I know when I was in 3rd grade, my parents didn't want me doing Family Life studies (about sex, marriage, etc.) so I was the only kid in the whole 3rd grade who had to go sit with another teacher in another room and do completely different work. I think they helped contribute to my anxiety and depression now that I think about it lol.

 

[rein]

That's inappropriate and very disrespectful. You should find out who it was and call them out.

 

[Deleted member 13496]

Why don't you celebrate Christmas? Most non-religious people still partake in the fun. It doesn't have to be a Christian thing.

Having said that, I'd be pretty furious if somebody was sending that shit to my child.

 

[Rvaan]

Yeah no. That's a problem.

 

[Jonathan Lanza]

I'm getting a bit paranoid, it recently came out to the school that we are atheists (everyone in my 6 year olds class was practicing for a Christmas sing along and she matter of fact told the teacher we don't celebrate Christmas and was put in a separate classroom with 3 other 1st graders who don't celebrate for one reason or another)

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Sorry if this is off topic but this seems.....excessive? Like that just seems like some very blatant otherizing that I imagine only makes kids feel bad.

 

[Subpar Scrub]

Bin the bible and keep the LEGO, fuck religion.

 

[TacomaSCDisaster]

Why don't you celebrate Christmas? Most non-religious people still partake in the fun. It doesn't have to be a Christian thing.

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Also this. My friends and I are largely atheist and still celebrate Christmas. It's interesting as a cultural event and a good reason to spend time together. Presents, trees, lights, etc. don't really have much of a religious connotation anyways.

 

[Deleted member 6215]

Sounds like the kind of thing a fundie Christian would do, but I wouldn't over-think it. My mom tried hiding that kind of shit in gifts she would give my kids. In her mind she was fulfilling the mandate to "witness."

Keep/donate the toys, toss the Bible, and move on.

 

[AndyD]

Christian parents overstepping their bounds into another families' life and trying to force their religion on someone else's kids? Well I never!

But seriously it's pretty shitty that whoever did that was clearly just trying to win your kids over to their religion with toys.

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This for sure.

 

[Hella]

Sounds like some religious nut has it out to convert your kids.

The latter two 'gifts' feel so targetted I'm curious what lego set it is.


Now I don't have kids so I don't actually have any good advice, but I'd keep my guard up around 'em. When I was young--too young to know anything about what was happening--a family friend was trying to convince my (non-practicing) parent to basically send me off to live with them and get indoctrinated into religion. Learning about it later was chilling as hell, and it's all wrapped up as "no, really, this is better for the child!". It's disgusting and also super dangerous stuff to peddle, so don't trust anyone trying it an inch--because they'll take that inch and never give it back.

 

[Brazil]

Sorry you have to deal with this, OP. The school needs to figure out who pulled this stunt. Freaking sickos.

 

[SteveWinwood]

bring in atheist pamphlets and give them to all the children!

they started it!

 

[Sonicbug]

You're not being paranoid, that is some serious microaggression going on. Is this a private school?

 

[Inugami]

First off, what the fuck is this?

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I went through something similar in highschool, seems pretty normal. I would have been fine with my daughter participating (its just songs like Rudolph and we wish you a merry Christmas) but my 6 year old told me she didn't want to cause she hates singing in front of people. It was weird that no one tried to contact me first though... But I didn't want to push the issue over something my daughter didn't want to do from the start.

 

[Deleted member 13496]

Also this. My friends and I are largely atheist and still celebrate Christmas. It's interesting as a cultural event and a good reason to spend time together. Presents, trees, lights, etc. don't really have much of a religious connotation anyways.

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Nearly every single person I know barring like, literally 3 or 4 people are atheists and everyone (except the Jewish ones) celebrates it.

 

[Yata]

I think you are being a little bit paranoid, this is probably just a randie parent who felt pity over your daughters not being Christian. I would be more worried about the classroom change, have you asked the reason why this change happened?

 

[BlackJace]

Aside from the Bible, it's already sus as fuck to be sending children unsolicited gifts

 

[Fubar]

100% it was the parents of some other kid in the class who mentioned that your daughter didnt believe in Christmas. That parent dropped off the gifts with the office and instructed them to not tell who they are, not in a malicious way, but because they "dont want the attention"

It is a parent way overstepping their bounds, but they would never view it that way. They probably think they did the nice and right thing.

 

[Manu]

Seriously fuck those people.

Christian parents overstepping their bounds into another families' life and trying to force their religion on someone else's kids? Well I never!

But seriously it's pretty shitty that whoever did that was clearly just trying to win your kids over to their religion with toys.

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And you just know they're the kind of people who probably complain about LGBT stuff and minorities being shoved down their throats.

 

[oreomunsta]

If it feels insulting to you, I'd donate the lego and the doll.

Regardless of if you keep the toys or not, make the school's administration aware of this and that you have beliefs that makes this action questionable

 

[N2BearHugs]

The opposite happened when I was that age. My parents made sure I knew Santa was a fraud, so I exposed the truth and upset enough of the other kids that I was quarantined and held until my father could come pick me up.

I picture myself in the principal's office smoking a cigarette while saying "...and don't get me started about the tooth fairy."

 

[Wraith]

So... I wonder if was this a nosy parent who heard it through the grape vine, or a faculty member who took it upon themselves to do this?

 

[Midramble]

That's evangelism for ya.

 

[Anti]

A bible? Christian nuts, religious nuts in general, are known for how pushy they are with their beliefs, they are fkn annoying...

 

[Lonewulfeus]

I get not celebrating jesus' fake birthday, but you don't celebrate the Santa version either?

 

[Inugami]

You're not being paranoid, that is some serious microaggression going on. Is this a private school?

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Nope, local public school.

Why don't you celebrate Christmas? Most non-religious people still partake in the fun. It doesn't have to be a Christian thing.

Having said that, I'd be pretty furious if somebody was sending that shit to my child.

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We have plenty of things we do with our kids, including gift exchanges, but we've divorced it from the day. Just how we decided to handle any sort of religious based holiday.

We've never discouraged others though from sharing in good faith. For example, when we lived closer, we let the grandparents give Christmas gifts and do easter egg hunts, but we now love in the other side of the country.

 

[Velocity:Design:Comfort]

Honestly, you should inquire with a lawyer. Your beliefs are being infringed upon and they are going to try to basically raise your kids in a way you don't want.

Why can they single out your kids and Other them like that? A (public) school should have no business involving Christmas songs or Christianity if it leads to kids needing to be put in a separate room. There's non specific holiday songs.

 

[TSM]

Also this. My friends and I are largely atheist and still celebrate Christmas. It's interesting as a cultural event and a good reason to spend time together. Presents, trees, lights, etc. don't really have much of a religious connotation anyways.

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Christmas is secular in 2019, and avoiding celebrating it because of religious overtones is probably a bit much. On the other hand not celebrating it because it's just a glorification of consumerism I can understand more.

 

[Venatio]

Just wait until they show up at your door. Repeatedly.

 

[sgtnosboss]

give them the gifts, say they are from you. toss the bible.

 

[Lonewulfeus]

Double post

 

[EvilChameleon]

The first two presents seem like a "all children should get presents at Christmas" sort of thing. The bible, however, is so bizarre and even more inappropriate.

 

[Doctoglethorpe]

I'm atheist I still celebrate Christmas, why don't you

 

[Alavard]

Why would the school be holding onto a gift to be delivered to one of their students? If you can get into the school you can just deliver a gift wrapped package and tell them to deliver it to a 6-year-old and their family anonymously? How is that safe?

 

[capitalCORN]

Tattoo your forehead with

And attend every parent event.

 

[BarryFishFinger]

I'd probably be mildly irritated that someone was basically ignoring my stated beliefs to push their version of what my kids should experience at Christmas.

But then, to me, even as an atheist I can't imagine being sufficiently passionate about atheism to not celebrate Christmas. We're basically athiest in my household but I think it's worthwhile my kids being around and involved in the various religious things they do at their school (multiple faiths) if only to broaden their view of what other people believe, why they believe it and what it means to them to believe. A frame of reference for our atheism I suppose? I can't imagine them being removed from a class when they go to a mosque for example, or when they do a project on Indian religious holidays, or when they practice their "Praise God" type songs in their nativity play.

And I think Christmas can still be a valid celebration of valuable human things (giving, being together, being thankful for what you have, tinsel) even if you ignore the Christian religious element.

 

[Burt]

You need to put a twelve-foot tall Baphomet with accompanying deep red lighting on your lawn before Christmas gets here

I'm only 33% serious

 

[Velocity:Design:Comfort]

You should ask the school if they have surveillance footage of someone dropping off the bag. This is targeted harassment, someone is trying to pressure you into converting your kids.

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This

 

[Zoe]

Honestly, you should inquire with a lawyer. Your beliefs are being infringed upon and they are going to try to basically raise your kids in a way you don't want.

Why can they single out your kids and Other them like that? A (public) school should have no business involving Christmas songs or Christianity if it leads to kids needing to be put in a separate room. There's non specific holiday songs.

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OP said they were singing secular songs. It was the daughter's choice to opt out.

And the way the school handled that is fine, IMO. Much better than forcing kids to participate or foregoing any celebration at all.