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Oct 25, 2017
1,478
I'm barely 5'5. I've been one of the short guys ever since high school when I just suddenly stopped growing. All throughout my dating life, I've been told that despite having a nice genuine personality, I was too short (even for girls who were still shorter than me). Whether it be approaching someone in class, at the bar, online, the result was almost always the same.

Last year, I met someone on Tinder who I really dug, but in the back of my mind, I was nervous to confirm my height with her. Eventually, I told her, and when we discovered that she was indeed taller than me she texted me "lol, does it matter?"

So that brings the question. This goes out to anyone. How much does height matter in your preferences?
 

Smurf

Member
Oct 25, 2017
26,535
I don't think it does. But it was also pointed out to me recently by my gf that the 2 ex's of mine that she knows/met are also around 6 feet tall, just like her.

So maybe I have a thing for taller people and just don't realize it.
 

Doggg

▲ Legend ▲
Member
Nov 17, 2017
14,442
I'm average height myself, and it doesn't matter to me at all. I was really shocked in high school to learn just how much people really care about these kinds of things. Like, man, people are really rude and shallow about something so trivial. It was really eye-opening about how a lot of people are.
 

Samuel

Member
Oct 27, 2017
219
It does to most, it doesn't to some.

Focus on the ones who accept you for you and don't base your worth on how the majority of nobodies sees you.
 

thatother

Member
Dec 12, 2017
345
More than people realize or like to admit I think. It's ok to have preferences, height included.
 
Oct 25, 2017
3,428
I'm gay, and I prefer shorter guys/guys around my height, so I guess it does matter lol (tall guys are hot too, I just find them intimidating).
 

Contrite

Member
Dec 12, 2017
121
Chemistry usually makes it moot, but when men are below 168~ish it becomes a slight negative modifier to attractiveness for me.
 

maxxpower

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
8,950
California
It really matters to the type of people that really care about that. There's just different types of people out there.
 

Mendrox

Banned
Oct 26, 2017
9,439
Job? Matters much. Relationships? Always depends on the person, but how many guys do you see with women that are bigger than them? Not many.

Is is important for credibility? Yes it helps a lot. Does it help with getting leader positions easier and more money? Yes.

So like many in here said it depends, but in most ways it's sadly important and I notice it at my job daily too how important that can be.


https://www.businessinsider.com/tall-people-are-richer-and-successful-2015-9?IR=T

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-...e-successful-in-life-study-find-a6919431.html

In fact, according to that study, a person who is 6 feet tall would be predicted to earn nearly $166,000 more over the course of a 30-year career than someone who clocks in at 5 feet 5 inches. (The researchers observed those results even when they controlled for gender.)
 

ultramooz

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,337
Paris, France
It doesn't play in my preferences, but I guess it can play a role in for certain types of sex activities. I'm quite short so when I find someone even shorter it's a weird feeling, haha.
 

smisk

Member
Oct 27, 2017
2,999
Seems like it matters in that it's one of the first thing someone will notice about a potential partner. I've noticed that women almost always seem to mention height when talking about a new guy they're talking to or have been on a date with. If they get to know you better they might not care. I'd bet that if asked the large majority of women would say they'd want to date someone taller than them. I don't necessarily think they all want to date someone who's 6'0 though.
I'm 5'8 and my girlfriends have been like 5'2 and 5'5 and I don't think either have cared too much about height as long as the person isn't shorter than them.
 
In my experience it's just one of many things people are looking at, and a good personality/sense of humor goes way further. My sister married a guy who's barely 5'0" and my husband is ~5'8". Don't get hung up on it and you'll find plenty of others who aren't either.
 

LosDaddie

Attempted to circumvent ban with alt account
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
3,622
Longwood, FL
More than people will want to admit.

General rule for guys; You're most likely going to date/marry a woman shorter than you.
 

Yoshimitsu126

The Fallen
Nov 11, 2017
14,683
United States
If I ever date, I'll use this a way to avoid people who care about my height. And if it's a lot, that saves time!

So I guess I'll invest in a pet in the future.
 

TheAbsolution

Member
Oct 25, 2017
6,391
Atlanta, GA
As a gay man who's almost 6 feet tall, I have a preference for shorter dudes than me. And for a lot of people including myself, it's just that. I wouldn't sweat it, a great personality goes a long way with a lot of people.
 
OP
OP
Sir_Bumble_Bee
Oct 25, 2017
1,478
Job? Matters much. Relationships? Always depends on the person, but how many guys do you see with women that are bigger than them? Not many.

Is is important for credibility? Yes it helps a lot. Does it help with getting leader positions easier and more money? Yes.

So like many in here said it depends, but in most ways it's sadly important and I notice it at my job daily too how important that can be.


https://www.businessinsider.com/tall-people-are-richer-and-successful-2015-9?IR=T

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-...e-successful-in-life-study-find-a6919431.html
Oh yeah, in the job market it goes a loooong way to be tall. What's ironic is that physical appearance matters immensely in interviews. I had a friend with solid grades, great speaker, 6'4, but he is dark-skinned with a football build and had a very tough time finding a job after graduating
Seems like it matters in that it's one of the first thing someone will notice about a potential partner. I've noticed that women almost always seem to mention height when talking about a new guy they're talking to or have been on a date with. If they get to know you better they might not care. I'd bet that if asked the large majority of women would say they'd want to date someone taller than them. I don't necessarily think they all want to date someone who's 6'0 though.
I'm 5'8 and my girlfriends have been like 5'2 and 5'5 and I don't think either have cared too much about height as long as the person isn't shorter than them.
See that's the thing, the first impression. Being a short man at a bar trying to talk to women means you gotta have some REALLY good conversation skills
In my experience it's just one of many things people are looking at, and a good personality/sense of humor goes way further. My sister married a guy who's barely 5'0" and my husband is ~5'8". Don't get hung up on it and you'll find plenty of others who aren't either.
Funny enough, the girl I mentioned in the OP was one of them. We've been dating for a few months and I've never been happier in my life
 

Skai

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,172
On dating apps it matter almost 99% of the time. In real life maybe 50/50
 

Jombie

Member
Oct 27, 2017
10,392
It can certainly matter to the individual. I'm 5'9" and wish I was at least 6'. But objectively? Doesn't matter at all, most of the time.
 

Cantaim

Member
Oct 25, 2017
33,323
The Stussining
I'm 5'5 and it doesn't matter. I don't hide my height in any of my dating profiles I wear that shit loud and proud. If a woman goes on a date with you and she decides height is the reason she won't see you again. It just means she didn't feel enough of a connection during that date.
 

Viewt

Member
Oct 25, 2017
2,801
Chicago, IL
I'm 5'8, maybe 5'9" if I stand perfectly straight and perk my head up. Height was a non-factor when I was single. There were always plenty of women who were shorter than me to balance out the women who were taller or wanted a dude 6' or above. So I never gave it much thought.

Having talked to my fiancée and other women about it, it doesn't seem like it matters, provided you're 5'6" or above. However, there definitely seemed to be apprehension about guys shorter than that. None of them said it would be a deal breaker, but they did say that there would need to be other factors that made up for it (personality, connection, handsomeness, etc).

It sucks for short guys, because there's obviously nothing you can do about it. The only option is to just be confident about who you are and let your good qualities outshine your height.

My gay friends are less choosy when it comes to height. I guess one of you is always gonna be taller, so it's less of a thing.
 

The Albatross

Member
Oct 25, 2017
38,985
The President of the United States asked his doctor to lie about his height and give him an extra 1 or 2 inches. It matters to him.

Depends, of course. Also, sometimes height sucks. I'm about 6'3"/6'4".. 6'4" with shoes on, 6'3" and some change flat footed. It helps me in basketball. I'm bad, but I've always been a good rebounder, good defender, good in the post because my length helps. But, it blows flying, going to the theatre, sitting in a car, sitting at a desk, sitting on the train, buying houses, buying bed frames, traveling to foreign countries, and just about anything else that involves interacting with a world that is designed for someone 5-8" shorter than you.

Bought my wife and I a treadmill 6mos ago for our basement. I kinda thought I might not be able to use it, but... nah. Can't. I can sort of "Walk" on it, but any speed faster than the slowest, flat setting, and my head hits the ceiling (Drop ceilings because of pipes, wires, etc). Even if I was able to pull the drops up ~2", my head would still go through the ceiling when running, or be so close that it wouldn't work.

We were looking at houses 2 weeks ago and likewise... there was this really nice, but kinda architecturally weird, and pretty inexpensive house in a town near by, like $100,000 less than what you'd expect similar square footage/age/quality/rooms to be in that location... And as soon as I walked in, I was like "Uhh, nope, this is why it's $100,000 less." The ceilings on half of the first floor were just over 7". Any sort of beams or door frames were barely over 6'6", maybe even right around my height. That house was constructed fucking weird, and I don't know why they'd do that, but some builder screwed it up in some way... ANd that was the result. Even if your head clears a room if you're 6'4" and the ceilings are 7", you feel like you're in a funhouse and it's claustrophobic.

For dating it helps. I haven't dated in... 8 years, I'm married, but ... back when I was single, I know if I was like a 5'8" average build guy (as opposed to 6'3"ish average build / dad bod guy), I might get a couple second looks or something, but honestly, being moderately tall, a ton more women look at you, comment on your height as an ice breaker, etc. I even think it ends up building into your personality because it's just reinforced behavior. Obviously this isn't the case for every tall person, there's plenty of tall, insecure men of course, and plenty of shorter, very confident men, but ... I dunno, I think if you get second looks enough times, consistently, for your whole adult life, then you end up building more confidence when dating. What's kinda weird is I've never really been into tall women. My wife is shorter, 5'5" or so, and my tallest ex was probably... 5'8" or 5'9", but I dated one girl who was 6'1" and... I dunno, it was intimidating for me. It wasn't a deal breaker or anything like that, it didn't work out for other reasons, but I can definitely say it was something that just took me off guard at first and I felt unsettled by it. It wasn't until the "relationship" ended that I kinda realized why she was physically intimidating to me, evebn though I've grown up around tall women (my mom was almost 6" when I was a kid, one sister is 6'1/6'2" ... which is probably why, my older sister used to kick the shit out of me when we'd fight as kids, and it's probably stuck with me). It's just a weird thing that is definitely something I subconciously noticed.
 
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skipgo

Member
Dec 28, 2018
2,568
It doesn't matter to me at all. But then again almost everyone is taller than me.
 

sgtnosboss

Member
Nov 9, 2017
4,786
it does not matter to me at all, and like Birdseye said, if it does, I would eliminate that person as a dating option. I feel your pain though, I am 5'4.
 
Dec 23, 2017
8,802
This will sound judgmental but I think If someone turns down being with a great person because of their height is says a lot about them. That person probably dodged a bullet.
 

mozbar

Member
Feb 20, 2018
856
I'm 195cm. Dunno what that is in the Imperial system. There are numerous advantages to being tall, most of which I probably never notice. In dating, most women I've interacted with are immediately taken by my height and are quick to point out that they'd never date someone shorter than them. I find that narrow minded, but I'm tall and so are my parents and grandparents from both sides...so I can't really tell you what someone shorter is likely to be thinking or looking for in a taller person.

But, man....the world sucks for tall people. Public transportation, buses or planes long trips, furniture, the type of cars you can buy (I love the MX-5 😞), clothing outlets, and in my case shoes. Though some people are really lucky too: they have average feet.

In certain cases, you can shell out more to better accommodate yourself, but this is not always true.

If you're in a nation that accommodates or has easy access to products and services for a tall person, you're quite fortunate.

Edit: Typed on my phone and didn't see the reply from The Albatross. But basically that.
 

GameShrink

Banned
Oct 29, 2017
2,680
5'9'', and I've dated women who were 5'0'' and ones who were 6'0''+ (tallest ever was a 6'3'' girl from the Czech Republic).

Most normal people don't care. Those that do generally are the types who aren't suited for long-lasting relationships anyway.
 
Oct 30, 2017
8,967
It matters, but being 6'3" ain't the pussy master key that some think it is. If you're not insecure about your height it's just something else.

It seems to matter a lot on tinder apparently but I wouldn't know. Never seen that happen.
 

Frodo

Avenger
Oct 27, 2017
4,338
I personally don't care for height. Usually like guys shorter than me, but I've been with guys that range from 5'3" (~160cm) to 6'8" (~210cm). I'm 6' (~183cm) myself.
 

Ezra

Member
Nov 14, 2017
499
I do have a type and height plays a role, but I would never stop dating someone because of it.
 

Deleted member 9971

User requested account closure
Banned
Oct 27, 2017
9,743
I am only 5'7 (tom cruise height) but my very good looks make up for it. So it wont hurt dating much tbh. Still have the dutch girls lookin at me :) even the tall ones.
 

mrmoose

Member
Nov 13, 2017
21,175
Everyone has preferences for attractiveness that often act as barriers to even giving someone the chance to have a connection, so I don't think height is any shallower a preference than hairline, facial features, etc. that you can't do much about. It seems like being short is usually a detriment to males and being tall is usually a detriment to females, but that's more due to social norms I think.
 

Thunder11

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,951
Height to me is unique because it's

1) Almost certainly out of ones control
2) you can literally filter for it by number on many websites and it's easily apparent in person
3) it's socially acceptable to bash short people, especially men, and to a much lesser extent abnormally tall people

It hurts men in dating to be short, no question about it, and it's a flat out dealbreaker, no matter what, to some people. You'll have to make up for it with good looks, personality, being interesting etc otherwise. All things equal, no question a 5'4 guy is gonna do way, way worse than if he were 6'1
 

Kino

Member
Oct 25, 2017
3,319
It matters but you can circumvent bias with charm, confidence and personality. If a person refuses to talk to you because you're short, that person is probably shit anyway.