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How are you supposed to lotion yourself?

  • Standing up

    Votes: 112 69.6%
  • Lying down

    Votes: 8 5.0%
  • Lotion body in portions throughout the day

    Votes: 11 6.8%
  • Sitting down

    Votes: 15 9.3%
  • Diving head-first in a tub full of lotion

    Votes: 15 9.3%

  • Total voters
    161

Royalan

I can say DEI; you can't.
Moderator
Oct 24, 2017
11,957
I like to lotion right as I get out of the shower, as my skin is still damp and the lotion spreads better.

And of course I lotion standing up. Sensually, in front of a mirror.
 

Perzeval

Prophet of Truth
Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
10,551
Sweden
T6bKpJD.jpg
 

Soundscream

Member
Nov 2, 2017
9,234
I swear a good portion of this forums parents raised them like an outdoor dog feeding them nothing but junk food and no vegetables which is why their digestive system gives them instant diarrhea when eating taco bell and they lack all common sense when it comes to personal or household maintenance.
 

KingK

Member
Oct 27, 2017
4,851
I only lotion my hands, and mostly just during winter when it's really dry.

I also just can't stand the feeling of lotion on my hands or chap stick on my lips or anything. Drives me fucking crazy. It takes all my willpower to not just instantly wipe that shit off, I hate it lol. Can't imagine having to apply it to my whole body every day.
 

Deleted member 48828

Account closed at user request
Banned
Oct 21, 2018
731
I swear a good portion of this forums parents raised them like an outdoor dog feeding them nothing but junk food and no vegetables which is why their digestive system gives them instant diarrhea when eating taco bell and they lack all common sense when it comes to personal or household maintenance.
Another portion of this forum posts the most condescending shit like this for no good reason.
 

mre

Member
Oct 25, 2017
42
I mean doesn't everyone get tired after bathing? Its annoying to stand straight and go head to toe and it will never not be annoying
Excuse my french, but what the fuck are you doing to get too tired after bathing that you simply lack the energy to stand up for 30 more seconds. You either need a high five if you're not bathing alone or a consult with a medical professional.
 

Aske

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
5,578
Canadia
Do non-black men lotion? I remember growing up and my white friends always said lotion was for girls.

I often have old white men come into my place of work shedding dry skin off their cracked hands, sticky with that stuff that dry skin leaks that isn't blood, and I think "boy are these men not gay or women" as I gag while dusting their leavings off my counter.

However I am white, and I use lotion, because I'm young enough to not have to worry about doing sensible things that older people consider emasculating because reasons.
 

Aske

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
5,578
Canadia
I only lotion my hands, and mostly just during winter when it's really dry.

I also just can't stand the feeling of lotion on my hands or chap stick on my lips or anything. Drives me fucking crazy. It takes all my willpower to not just instantly wipe that shit off, I hate it lol. Can't imagine having to apply it to my whole body every day.

I often feel that way about certain lotions. You might just need to try a different one that better suits your skin type. I find Vaseline intensive care Dry Skin Repair (I don't have especially dry skin) is fantastic everywhere but my face. Absorbs fast, and just leaves my skin soft and clean.
 

HiLife

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
39,649
How lazy you gotta be where you refuse to just bend down and lotion your legs. Lol.
 

Godfather

Game on motherfuckers
Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
3,488
You don't lotion? Doesn't your skin get all dry and ashy? And certain parts you re-apply. You don't necessarily have to.

I've never used moisturizer or anything. Average white guy fwiw. I know black friends used stuff when they were ashy, but I didn't think it was every daily. My wife uses stuff on her elbows for mild psoriasis.

The closest for me is making sure I'm well coated with sunblock if I'm gonna be in the sun for long.
 

wenis

Member
Oct 25, 2017
16,110
you do the best you can and if you got a partner they can get the hard to reach places.

lotion is important. some good shea butter whew.
 

Aske

The Fallen
Oct 25, 2017
5,578
Canadia
I've never used moisturizer or anything. Average white guy fwiw. I know black friends used stuff when they were ashy, but I didn't think it was every daily. My wife uses stuff on her elbows for mild psoriasis.

The closest for me is making sure I'm well coated with sunblock if I'm gonna be in the sun for long.

Question is, how dry is your skin? Do you not lotion because your skin doesn't get dry when you wash, or because white men often don't consider using lotion despite the fact that it might improve their lives?

We will need high resolution photos of all your skin. You can blur out your eyes, but nothing else.
 
Oct 28, 2017
2,030
Excuse my french, but what the fuck are you doing to get too tired after bathing that you simply lack the energy to stand up for 30 more seconds. You either need a high five if you're not bathing alone or a consult with a medical professional.
Try having some empathy for others. A lot of people with disabilities and/or neurodiversity have issues with showers. Taking a shower can knock me on my ass for several hours because of a chronic fatigue issue. Many people have intolerance to rapid temperature changes, the water pressure can cause pain, having the stress of the time limit to exert yourself to wash fully and quickly without wasting a bunch of water, stress of having a post shower routine that you might or might not be able to do without laying in bed for 30 mins+ to recover first, and there's probably a dozen more reasons that people find showers draining that I can't even think of right now.

I know that Era has a United States bias but I always consider the unsolicited "you're abnormal man, go see a doctor" post to be really rude because of the amount of money I've sunk into trying to get a proper diagnosis (that I still do not have yet btw). You never know what another person's situation is, how do you know OP hasn't seen a doctor for post-exertional malaise? I'll also add that post-exertional malaise is one of the symptoms of Long Covid, so a lot of new people might have it now or soon. It sucks!

I'm a basic-ass white dude and I do the lotion standing up. Just face, hands, arms, ass, legs, and the tops of feet get moisturizer because I tend to break out a lot on my torso if I put moisturizer on it. I do use a toner on my chest though.
 

Oreoleo

Avenger
Oct 25, 2017
1,947
Ohio
There are numerous objects in a bathroom to lean against / prop your foot on to facilitate moisturizing. Doing it laying in bed is just gonna ruin your sheets. Y'all wildin.
 

Deleted member 110527

Mar 11, 2022
1,311
where's the "fill my bathtub with it" option
 

zma1013

Member
Oct 27, 2017
7,682
How do you put on lotion and then grab the bottle to get more without getting lotion all over the bottle?
 
Oct 27, 2017
21,538
As a white guy, the only thing I regularly put lotion on is my elbows because they get dry and cracked. But rubbing lotion all over isn't a thing I need to do.
 

astro

Member
Oct 25, 2017
56,947
Lol, why do some people get kinda hostile over stuff like this?

So weird.

Anyway, I do it however I feel most comfortable at the time. There's a small patch of skin right in the place where I can't quite usually reach upper middle ofy back that I've got some yoga type positions I need to get into to reach, so it's kind of a mix for me I guess.
 

L Thammy

Spacenoid
Member
Oct 25, 2017
50,018
People are acting like the issue with dry skin is that you're shedding powder all over the place when the real evil is that it makes you itchy as all hell.

Although not having eyebrow dandruff would probably be a bonus.
 

pokeystaples

Member
Oct 27, 2017
5,349
I often have old white men come into my place of work shedding dry skin off their cracked hands, sticky with that stuff that dry skin leaks that isn't blood, and I think "boy are these men not gay or women" as I gag while dusting their leavings off my counter.

However I am white, and I use lotion, because I'm young enough to not have to worry about doing sensible things that older people consider emasculating because reasons.
Whew! When my wife (white) and I started dating she did not lotion. Over time she got into the habit. Fast forward to this last visit to her family. "Thanks for convincing me to lotion." Her mom's skin was dry as FUCK. Flaking all over the place. Like she'd never heard of lotion in her entire 62 years.
 

marcus

Member
Oct 27, 2017
328
These lotion/moisturizer threads are always funny. Pease take care of your skin people. A basic routine of cleanser, moisturizer, and sunscreen goes a long way.
 

Allietraa

Prophet of Truth
Member
Mar 13, 2019
1,901
I only lotion my hands, and mostly just during winter when it's really dry.

I also just can't stand the feeling of lotion on my hands or chap stick on my lips or anything. Drives me fucking crazy. It takes all my willpower to not just instantly wipe that shit off, I hate it lol. Can't imagine having to apply it to my whole body every day.
I used to be this way but I found some in-shower lotion that you put on and then rinse off, its way less greasy feeling(imo) and it doesnt wipe off onto stuff like normal lotion. Works fine for me although its kinda slippery in the shower so tough to suggest putting on your feet lol