Not meaningfully, I'm somewhat left of my parents but we all want the Trump admin and the GOP out. If Biden ends up with some kind of blowout then the game changes, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.
-
Ever wanted an RSS feed of all your favorite gaming news sites? Go check out our new Gaming Headlines feed! Read more about it here.
-
We have made minor adjustments to how the search bar works on ResetEra. You can read about the changes here.
Have you had "the talk" with your politically/ideologically polar opposite parent(s)?
- Thread starter John Rabbit
- Start date
My Dad regularly moans about political descions, I ask him who he voted for. He says voting wouldn't matter even if a party campaigned on whatever issue is bugging him. TBF what he cares about are random and would be split across all parties. He hates Trump more than anything so cares more about American politics than the UK.
My mum is centre and will literally make her mind up the day of an election usually based on which leader she (dis)likes. Usually Labour but she hated Corbyn as much as Cameron so went Tories last time. I just gently point out how they screw everything up, I think she regrets it now.
My mum is centre and will literally make her mind up the day of an election usually based on which leader she (dis)likes. Usually Labour but she hated Corbyn as much as Cameron so went Tories last time. I just gently point out how they screw everything up, I think she regrets it now.
It just saddens me to no end that politics can have such an defining influence over a family relationship. Politics is just something we keep to ourselves in our family, same as religious topics. I know that my mom believes in some sort of God, she knows I'm a bleak nihilist. That's all that needs to be known. We still love each other.
Out of curiosity, how are you planning to do this?
Are you gonna try to be gentle or are you gonna be blunt?
Dude, talk to her... Social media is often such a super distilled representation of who a person really is.
Of course, If this where anyone else I'd say fukk that person. No reason to give QAnon nutjobs your time of day.
But she's your mom. Don't write her an email... And if you say she's been descending deeper into stupid territory over the years, perhaps she also doesn't have enough people around her to pull her out of there again. Dunno if that applies here but at least think on that.
If I had stopped talking to my kind of isolated mom she may have started developing such thoughts also.
Of course, If this where anyone else I'd say fukk that person. No reason to give QAnon nutjobs your time of day.
But she's your mom. Don't write her an email... And if you say she's been descending deeper into stupid territory over the years, perhaps she also doesn't have enough people around her to pull her out of there again. Dunno if that applies here but at least think on that.
If I had stopped talking to my kind of isolated mom she may have started developing such thoughts also.
I think the difference between politics and religion is that politics actually means something. If someone votes for Trump they're probably a xenophobe and that family member can get fucked.
Eh, I get it. My dad's religious and I'm not, we don't care but we'll fight over politics because he legit wants to make it to where we never have good health care, that we legalize discrimination against minority groups, that we turn into the wild west with people shooting each other over what in his time, and my youth, would have been fist fights, wants us running out of water and watching the seas rise just so we can make a buck now and he votes to make that happen. Clearly there's a difference.
A person can be totally religious and outside of probably annoying their kids, which I'll leave up to the child to resent or not, aren't really exerting force onto the population but politics, when your vote actually hurts people and it's intentional not talking about it to maintain your relationship is kinda a disservice to the rest of your countrymen.
Like, for example, my dad's told me he doesn't think everyone should be allowed to vote, he would vote for a candidate that would send us back to poll taxes and only property owners voting, doesn't think we should be electing our senators anymore and that it should go back to just being appointees from the State, he's an enemy of fucking Democracy, I have an obligation to engage with that.
Yes, and I made them more left than ever. The coronacrisis also really helped with this. The fact that the past couple of governments reduced the social safety net we had in place in the 20th century really shows now. My parents used to vote for CDA (a Dutch center-right party for christians). They're willing to vote for either the center-left PVDA (Dutch Labour Party) or even the really left and progressive GroenLinks (literally GreenLeft) during the upcoming election in march.
I think the scariest thing is finding out you could be in your 30's, 40's, or even 50's, and your parents still respond with the equivalent of, "Ah, you kids, you don't know what you're talking about." The majority of the Boomers (and the remaining Silents) refuse to defer to the experience and education of the next generations, because they read a thing on Facebook.com or saw something scary on Fox News. They're going to clutch those reins and steer the horses toward the cliff until their dying breath.
If nothing else, it's a lesson to take as you get older, and start having trouble keeping up. Yes, experience teaches, but also listen to younger generations, and trust that there's a point when they have to take over, ready or not.
If nothing else, it's a lesson to take as you get older, and start having trouble keeping up. Yes, experience teaches, but also listen to younger generations, and trust that there's a point when they have to take over, ready or not.
my dad is legitimately a dumbass in regards to politics and fully susceptible to Republican propaganda, but I've convinced him not to vote because "Trump's got it in the bag" lol
I'll never not feel hurt for family members that voted in a homophobic. It basically says "I don't care enough"
I've talked about this before here... I feel like I repeat myself a lot... Apologies for that.
My parents have Fox news in their ears and Fox news only.
They both spend a significant time of their lives procuring food, cooking it in and feeding the local homeless community. They feed tens of people multiple times a month. Delicious healthy food made with love. Often when I call my mom, she's on the hustle going to Costco to find good deals ect. They prepare care packages that include basic toiletries, socks, blankets and water. They genuinely care about helping the community.
You can imagine how confusing it is talking to my father and hear him spout off about Democrats wanting to ruin the economy by giving "government handouts" to people who "don't want to work." He says this knowing that I went through a financial crisis that left me suicidal and at my wits end. I asked him if he thought feeding hungry people was a similar handout and he went in about how the Democratic governor restricts his ability to distribute food. No idea wtf he was talking about.
My dad is Mexican and my mom is probably also, although that side of the family insists on "Spanish" roots. Hard eye roll.
Anyways, how in the fuck do they love Trump? I cannot wrap my head around it.
How do they support a rapist? This is the same mother who, with my father by her side, read my victim statement in front of the judge and in front of my rapist because I chose not to go to court? How?
My parents have Fox news in their ears and Fox news only.
They both spend a significant time of their lives procuring food, cooking it in and feeding the local homeless community. They feed tens of people multiple times a month. Delicious healthy food made with love. Often when I call my mom, she's on the hustle going to Costco to find good deals ect. They prepare care packages that include basic toiletries, socks, blankets and water. They genuinely care about helping the community.
You can imagine how confusing it is talking to my father and hear him spout off about Democrats wanting to ruin the economy by giving "government handouts" to people who "don't want to work." He says this knowing that I went through a financial crisis that left me suicidal and at my wits end. I asked him if he thought feeding hungry people was a similar handout and he went in about how the Democratic governor restricts his ability to distribute food. No idea wtf he was talking about.
My dad is Mexican and my mom is probably also, although that side of the family insists on "Spanish" roots. Hard eye roll.
Anyways, how in the fuck do they love Trump? I cannot wrap my head around it.
How do they support a rapist? This is the same mother who, with my father by her side, read my victim statement in front of the judge and in front of my rapist because I chose not to go to court? How?
People got the balls to talk all progressive online and on here. But 50% can't even tell their parents to fuck off with the bigotry. That's how you know why shit is the way it is. Being complacent and not rocking the boat in their own lives is the preferable option.
Yeaaaa this is definitely racist as hell, I think you found your answer. Both your moms side of the family and Trump supporters think they are superior.
My mother and stepfather stopped trying to talk politics around me for some reason.
Stepdad especially got served a few harsh truths when talking bullshit.
Occasionally me and my brother visit at the same time and he sometimes tries to pander (Dutch) alt-right bullshit, but since he's a total dumbass who only repeats the memes from Facebook he gets hella angry with me quickly.
Stepdad especially got served a few harsh truths when talking bullshit.
Occasionally me and my brother visit at the same time and he sometimes tries to pander (Dutch) alt-right bullshit, but since he's a total dumbass who only repeats the memes from Facebook he gets hella angry with me quickly.
True. Don't let Facebook be the only source of political information some people have, or things will never change.
I'm sure my dad is R, he never jumped in on politics in my life but we don't talk anymore so I can't say.
My mom kicked me out a few years ago, she of course is a drunken R supporter.
My grandpa is a Trump fanatic, and while he's done a lot for me and I love him for that, I can't wait to see the look on his face if Trump loses.
My grandma has been pretty apolitical past "dont raise taxes" but she doesn't vote. Until this year. Im worried grandpa's fox news binge is finally getting in her head.
My brother is an R dipshit who thinks gay is an insult and getting arrested is a badge of honor.
As for me, I cant wait to move out of my grandparents and cut off most contact with everyone sans grandma.
My mom kicked me out a few years ago, she of course is a drunken R supporter.
My grandpa is a Trump fanatic, and while he's done a lot for me and I love him for that, I can't wait to see the look on his face if Trump loses.
My grandma has been pretty apolitical past "dont raise taxes" but she doesn't vote. Until this year. Im worried grandpa's fox news binge is finally getting in her head.
My brother is an R dipshit who thinks gay is an insult and getting arrested is a badge of honor.
As for me, I cant wait to move out of my grandparents and cut off most contact with everyone sans grandma.
Luckily, we (including my parents) have zero contact with that side of the family now. They are definitely self-hating racist fucks. It's pretty funny that they all have thick ass accents and speak in slang spanglish. But yeah, that's where my mom comes from, so it's a valid point. Given everything else outlined in my post, though, it's still perplexing.
My parents (and especially my mother) have actually become much more progressive over the years, and I want to think that's partially due to my positive influence among other factors. Like, I remember 15 years ago they were taking part on protests against gay marriage (which was approved more than a decade ago in Spain) and now they're embarrased of it.
The fact that the right-wing parties in Spain are downright disgusting nowadays, also helps, I guess.
Many people fled from Spain after fascism overthrew the legitimate government in the 30s. There is plenty of people in Cuba, from example, whose grandparents were born in Spain, and many countries have dual citizenship treaties with Spain, as a reparation for the descendants of those expats.
So it's not that strange. I don't think that should be seen as bad, everyone has the right to know their roots.
The fact that the right-wing parties in Spain are downright disgusting nowadays, also helps, I guess.
Many people fled from Spain after fascism overthrew the legitimate government in the 30s. There is plenty of people in Cuba, from example, whose grandparents were born in Spain, and many countries have dual citizenship treaties with Spain, as a reparation for the descendants of those expats.
So it's not that strange. I don't think that should be seen as bad, everyone has the right to know their roots.
Thankfully my mum is very left wing and has voted Labour her whole life. My dad used to be a Tory, hardly a surprise as he works in banking and went to Oxford, but he stopped voting for them after Brexit and thinks Johnson is an incompetent moron. I think he voted Lib Dem at the last two elections. My grandparents on my dad's side are both ardent Tories, proper 'no-one should be given anything for free, you have to work for everything in life' kind of people, but they're both lovely and pretty harmless. My dad did have a few arguments with his mum over Johnson's response to coronavirus but that's as far as it gets in regards to politics with us.
I got into a massive argument with my parents and laid out why supporting this president was immoral in so many ways before telling them that they had to choose between watching Fox News or ever speaking to me again. They immediately turned the TV back on to watch Sean Hannity spew his utter garbage. I left and have not spoken a word to them since. This was a year and a half ago.
They've attempted to guilt trip me for not talking to them through my siblings and family friends but I have made it clear I want nothing to do with their hateful, bigoted spiteful selves. Doesn't help that all except one of my siblings are avid Fox News zealots too. I guess that what I get for being born in the Bible Belt. I'm so sick of all the fake Christian bullshit and backstabbing
They've attempted to guilt trip me for not talking to them through my siblings and family friends but I have made it clear I want nothing to do with their hateful, bigoted spiteful selves. Doesn't help that all except one of my siblings are avid Fox News zealots too. I guess that what I get for being born in the Bible Belt. I'm so sick of all the fake Christian bullshit and backstabbing
Last edited:
My dad has fallen to the Fox News poison, thinks supporting Biden is "supporting the enemy." We got into a heated argument a few weeks ago about statistics regarding voter fraud. Ended with him telling me to kill myself.
I cannot reason with him. He's someone who should actually be more leftist than me, because it's through his life I saw that things didn't work out. Stuck in a jobs cult culture where he was hospitalized twice a year, and he instantly got healthier as soon as he was forced to retire. Someone who has to put up with stupid insurance shit. The Sanders platform works for people like him, yet he likes Trump because he was paid for construction on one of his projects in NYC, but this should out the fact my dad is a white man most of all.
I don't choose to have "talks" with people. Data talks. Much of my beliefs on what we have to do come primarily from data, not spooky political stories about takeovers of socialism, caravans (where'd they go btw?) and other forms of bullshit. Follow the data or fuck off, that's where I'm at now.
I cannot reason with him. He's someone who should actually be more leftist than me, because it's through his life I saw that things didn't work out. Stuck in a jobs cult culture where he was hospitalized twice a year, and he instantly got healthier as soon as he was forced to retire. Someone who has to put up with stupid insurance shit. The Sanders platform works for people like him, yet he likes Trump because he was paid for construction on one of his projects in NYC, but this should out the fact my dad is a white man most of all.
I don't choose to have "talks" with people. Data talks. Much of my beliefs on what we have to do come primarily from data, not spooky political stories about takeovers of socialism, caravans (where'd they go btw?) and other forms of bullshit. Follow the data or fuck off, that's where I'm at now.
I can't imagine having right wing parents.
Thankfully mine are heavily left leaning so whenever we get together it is all about shitting on Erdoğan.
Thankfully mine are heavily left leaning so whenever we get together it is all about shitting on Erdoğan.
Great point. It's alarming how tightly that generation is holding on. I get the concept of 'I know better', but there seems to be very little attempt to have rational discourse with the next generations. There's a heap of dismissive and stubborn behavior that is driving a generational divide. Not good.
The other lesson I intend to use, is to never let myself get into a situation where I am obsessively consuming content from a single source. The fact that Fox News can run 'opinion' programming and have people watching daily, for hours, is terrifying. The likes of OANN is a sign that we'll see more of it. I never want to be the person who is watching a singular TV network or range of 'opinion' content for hours and hours. I think people should do their own research, and at the very least, look at another couple of perspectives without screeching 'fake news' at anything they disagree with. Terrifying.
Of course I have. My parents and I fight about politics constantly. Less so with my mother in recent years, as she's become somewhat more left-leaning - And by that I mean she hates Bibi to a deeply personal level. But even if we can agree somewhat electorally, unfortunately that's not nearly enough over here and she's quite upset over my pro-Palestinian activism - She called me a traitor during the 2014 Gaza conflict and suggested I should go live in Gaza lol, and she said she'd cut me off if I refuse to serve in the IDF.
My father is super racist, conservative and religious (he's a hozer betshuva) and a hardcore Bibist, which is... quite a bit more difficult.
For the most part I hide a big part of my activism from both of them, which helps keep things somewhat peaceful. One time a friend tagged me on FB holding a sign that said "8000 reasons to boycott apartheid Israel" or something like that - That was not a fun time.
My father is super racist, conservative and religious (he's a hozer betshuva) and a hardcore Bibist, which is... quite a bit more difficult.
For the most part I hide a big part of my activism from both of them, which helps keep things somewhat peaceful. One time a friend tagged me on FB holding a sign that said "8000 reasons to boycott apartheid Israel" or something like that - That was not a fun time.
Yes, I'm very in their face about it. My dad specifically. I tell him how his boy Don is fucking up every time we talk. It's great.
My mom is more liberal.
My mom is more liberal.
My dad has ended up realizing that Trump is bad, and my memories of him have always been left-leaning, but earlier this year he told me that he was a Republican for a long time and still considers himself as such. Whenever we discuss the problems in the country and policy solutions, though, he almost always sides with Democrats, so I really don't know. I've pushed back against his identifying as a Republican, and he has expressed that he can't stand what it is now. I think this probably comes from his family being heavy Republicans and him being afraid of being outcast by them if he starts politically identifying as a Democrat instead, but I don't think he'd admit to that if it was the case.
On the other hand, I have an estranged brother I tried to reconnect with who turned out to be a neo-Nazi. I've never hit the block button so fast. No more interest in reconnecting with that little slice of the family.
On the other hand, I have an estranged brother I tried to reconnect with who turned out to be a neo-Nazi. I've never hit the block button so fast. No more interest in reconnecting with that little slice of the family.
I just flat out refuse to talk politics with my parents when I visit after we had various rows surrounding it. We basically had a chat and agreed to never discuss anything political again.
Yes I know ignorance isn't the best policy
But I'd rather have a good relationship with my parents
Yes I know ignorance isn't the best policy
But I'd rather have a good relationship with my parents
for a time, i had some small hope that they were learning valuable lessons as they stopped tuning in to fox news and were expressing some conflict. but, they've only swung into an even further extreme right hole with other news channels and sources that fox news wouldn't even want to touch and i honestly have no idea how they went from the tipping point of maybe finally understanding the bigotry, hatred, and anti-intellectualism their votes and party empowered. but they doubled down so hard that it is impossible to reach them any longer.
dad's buying guns and stocking ammo to prepare for a race war he feels is imminent. he's grown tired of covid and thinks it's "bullshit" despite several people he works with testing positive and having some rough cases. mom's going deep into the anti-blm (but she listens to the blues and jazz and gogo music, so in her mind she clearly can't be racist) and "antifa is the problem" rhetoric with a touch of q-anon for good measure. they attend trump rallies, something they've never done for any republican politician before. they are virulent and voracious in their support and only sometimes hold their tongues because they know i'm not going to let it go unchecked.
i thought the lead-up to 2016 would be the worst of it, but as i have grown even further to the left they have responded in kind by jumping so far off the deep end that i feel no hope in ever seeing them come to their senses again.
dad's buying guns and stocking ammo to prepare for a race war he feels is imminent. he's grown tired of covid and thinks it's "bullshit" despite several people he works with testing positive and having some rough cases. mom's going deep into the anti-blm (but she listens to the blues and jazz and gogo music, so in her mind she clearly can't be racist) and "antifa is the problem" rhetoric with a touch of q-anon for good measure. they attend trump rallies, something they've never done for any republican politician before. they are virulent and voracious in their support and only sometimes hold their tongues because they know i'm not going to let it go unchecked.
i thought the lead-up to 2016 would be the worst of it, but as i have grown even further to the left they have responded in kind by jumping so far off the deep end that i feel no hope in ever seeing them come to their senses again.
Not really. My mom and I don't talk too much in the first place so when we do politics rarely comes up.
Relevant podcast if you want to engage with your parents:
The episode: How to talk politics without wrecking relationships
This sums it perfectly for me. Not worth losing the relationship
Nah they vote left, we cool
I mean it wasn't very long ago in their lifetimes we were a family of commies
I mean it wasn't very long ago in their lifetimes we were a family of commies
It's never really been brought up recently. Back in 2008, my dad voted republican and I'm sure my mom pays zero attention to politics and followed suit.
My dad passed away in 2010, so I have no idea where he would stand in regards to Trump. My mom voted for Trump in 2016, probably for no reason other than because he was the republican candidate, and a few of us criticized her on it back then, but I don't know where she stands with it now.
My dad passed away in 2010, so I have no idea where he would stand in regards to Trump. My mom voted for Trump in 2016, probably for no reason other than because he was the republican candidate, and a few of us criticized her on it back then, but I don't know where she stands with it now.
Yes. My parents are divorced, but they're both Republicans and both voted for Trump in 2016. My mom sounds a lot like OP's dad in that she's not a totally unreasonable person. She was still on board with Trump until this year with how he handled COVID. I don't live in the states but the last time we had it out over politics was before that. My sister told me that she's voting for Biden this year. My dad is too far gone. Deep state, Qanon, etc. He won't wear a mask because he thinks the deep state puts the virus in the masks. He used to be a great person and he raised me well, so his fall has been hard and possibly the greatest disappointment of my life. I love them both but I'm glad to live on the other side of the planet.
My dad was a republican voter.(2016 he didn't vote for either candidate.) But he can't stand Trump because of his antics and his response to Vovid almost killed him so he voted down blue this time. :)
My dad's all aboard the Trump train, and between him watching fox all day, and my moms sister throwing bill gates conspiracy theories -- my mom told my sister (who voted for the first time yesterday (Florida)) that she threw her vote away on Biden. And how if he does somehow win it was purely by fraudulent votes.
Normally my mom is independent with a blue lean. But she's slowly started to become a single issue voter with abortion.
Its disheartening.
That said myself, my brother, and my sisters votes all went to Biden.
Normally my mom is independent with a blue lean. But she's slowly started to become a single issue voter with abortion.
Its disheartening.
That said myself, my brother, and my sisters votes all went to Biden.
I have been stuck living with my fascist parents, but am hoping to get the fuck out soon. Once I'm out, I'm cutting all contact with both of them. I am beyond done.
My wife's father-in-law liked Trump at first, but I think he was being influenced by the people he worked with. We had some conversations that let him see his faults, and he finally completely turned on him when coronavirus hit. So there's that.
My own family is pretty on the left, though we never really talked politics until Trump came around. Luckily it's a constant bash-fest.
My own family is pretty on the left, though we never really talked politics until Trump came around. Luckily it's a constant bash-fest.