I'm a little nervous. I don't have to go under. No needle, no scapal. They use a numbing gel. Generally it takes them 8-10 minutes for the procedure, but as a child I had surgery around left side of my groin, so there's scar tissue built up around the vas deferen area to locate. But the doctor said he can do it, so it will probably take 20-30 minutes.
For those that had it done, and was awake, did it hurt? Feel anything at all? The doctor said 0% chance of feeling any pain.
I had a no-scalpel vasectomy four years ago this May. The whole experience was super easy and relatively painless (I've had dental work that was more unpleasant). The only real moment of pain was a slight jolt / kick as the anesthetic took effect, which my urologist told me to expect. He was careful to mention anything I might feel / smell (a faint burning scent from the cauterized ducts, if you're wondering) so as not to be alarmed. The whole process took about two and a half, maybe three hours but that includes waiting before and in recovery; the procedure itself was maybe 30-40 minutes tops. My wife had taken the day off to drive me home (and your doctor may require that), but I honestly felt well enough I could have handled it.
There was only a little bit of bleeding (a few drops at most) the first and second day, none on the third. Since it's no-scalpel, it's going to be two tiny pinprick-sized incisions on your scrotum and there won't be stitches to worry about. I used the ice pack they gave me on the way home and then immediately switched to frozen peas (they can conform to whatever shape you need better than ice packs) and kept rotating those in and out to keep the swelling down (99% of your pain is going to come from swelling so keeping things on ice is the most important thing). I also took some Aleve to preemptively stop any pain. Don't just sit on the ice, you've gotta really get them on there and keep the swelling down, like I said that's what's going to cause the most pain.
It also helped that my wife was home to bring me food / drinks, that minimized the need to get up often. I basically spent the weekend in a recliner playing video games which minimized my movement; watching TV / movies or reading doesn't require you to hold as still so I recommend gaming, something that will soak up your time and attention but nothing too frustrating. As a result, I didn't feel even a little pain, and any discomfort I had was minimal (about the same level as sitting wrong for a while.) I wouldn't recommend sleeping in bed the first few nights too because of movement in your sleep.
That discomfort, such as it was, lasted maybe a week and a half, tops. I can't even see the scars anymore (like I said, they were two very tiny pinpricks to begin with).
The best advice in this thread lol
The to-do list I was given before mine explicitly said *
not* to shave, when I asked why he said (and it's important to note that my urologist had an awesome sense of humor, maybe it was a distraction technique but we were swapping jokes the entire time) that with the no scalpel procedure "unless you're super hairy" it's really not necessary and "people can make a real mess down there" which I assume could lead to other issues.
Wasn't bad at all, I was back lovemaking in around 10 days.
Uh... I hope it was self love. It's been a while but I
definitely had two separate sterility tests a month apart before I was cleared for swimmer-free frolicking.
