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Squid Bunny

One Winged Slayer
Member
Jun 11, 2018
5,342
Nintendo just betrayed it's fandom permanently.

Legit seasons and months of teased directs, easter eggs on the tweets, and little stuff like instagram descriptions, not to mention the huge insider scoops and other directs they did over the years. even Sabi was building up to something. And then today it's all just a Partner Showcase. All the first party games and deep gameplay for another transparent shovelware cash grab that oh-so-convenientually coincides with them reselling old games for $60 due to being money grubbing jerks. Not mention you them dropping MP4 and not giving Gold Coins to new players there guaranteeing its going to die off even more

Nintendo has no honor and is just a shameless sellout. One thing to have one-off sgame specific direct and stuff but literally killing the main direct and having AN ENTIRE DIRECT dedicated to boring Rocky shovelware is just shortsighted and insane.

I will be taking my money elsewhere and banning Nintendo from my household.
 

Game Fan

Member
Oct 25, 2017
990
Brazil
Nintendo just betrayed it's fandom permanently.

Legit seasons and months of teased directs, easter eggs on the tweets, and little stuff like instagram descriptions, not to mention the huge insider scoops and other directs they did over the years. even Sabi was building up to something. And then today it's all just a Partner Showcase. All the first party games and deep gameplay for another transparent shovelware cash grab that oh-so-convenientually coincides with them reselling old games for $60 due to being money grubbing jerks. Not mention you them dropping MP4 and not giving Gold Coins to new players there guaranteeing its going to die off even more

Nintendo has no honor and is just a shameless sellout. One thing to have one-off sgame specific direct and stuff but literally killing the main direct and having AN ENTIRE DIRECT dedicated to boring Rocky shovelware is just shortsighted and insane.

I will be taking my money elsewhere and banning Nintendo from my household.

374.png
 

Manu

Member
Oct 27, 2017
17,175
Buenos Aires, Argentina
I'm so much happier now that I'm dead. Technically missing. Soon to be presumed dead. Gone.

And this lazy oblivious and incompetent "Epic Games" company will go to prison for my murder. Fornite took my pride and my dignity and my hope and my money. He took and took from me until I no longer existed. That's murder. Let the punishment fit the crime. To take all this build-up only for it to be a Marvel sellout you have to have discipline. You befriend a local idiot. Harvest the details of her hundrum life and cram her with stories about how we're fighting agains Apple in order to save the videogame industry. Secretly create some money troubles: push more MTX and skins. With the help of the unwitting, bump up your life insurance. Purchase the retail add-on packs. Generic. Overpriced. Pay cash. You need to package yourself so that people will truly mourn your loss. You feel physically ill. A lot. A lot. A lot. You start to post about how the next update will save the game. How the game still retains that Fall Guys, PUBG magic, even though you damn now deep in yourself that's one hell of a lie. August. The game gets pulled out of every store. The Unreal engine itself is on the break of being delisted on mobile devices. "This is a marketing ploy, I'm sure of it". I repeat to myself. But then you see legal action. And because you're you, you don't stop there. You go back. To the day this fucking game was announced. Start with the fairy-tale days. Those are true. After that, you invent. "Fornite is to the entertainment industry what sliced bread was to food". "The game makes purchasing any other new release pointless" The spending, the abuse, the fear, the threat of violence. And Epic thought they were the one in control... burn it, just the right amount. Make sure the fans will find it. Finally, honor tradition with a very special treasure hunt. And if I get everything right, the world will hate Epic Games for killing their beautiful, legacy franchise. And after all the outrage, when I'm ready, I'll go out and buy an iPhone 12. And when my mother finds me investing my precious time trying to bond with this hot anime girl on this new gacha game, I'll look straight into her eyes and say "but did you notice the pull I just had?" In that very moment, she knows. She fucking knows. As she handles me the nugget pieces she previously cooked for me, she leaves my room with these words: "Apple will save the game industry". And that's when the people will know, Epic Games dumped this franchise like garbage, and it floated past all the other abused, unwanted, inconvenient franchises like Castlevania and Mass Effect. The Fornite fans will be gone, but then we never really existed. We loved a game we pretended to like.

"A true F2P game".

Gamers always use that, don't they? As their defining compliment: "League of Legends is a true F2P game, not this garbage". A true F2P game is hot. A true F2P game is game. A true F2P game is fun. A true F2P game never makes its fans angry. It only smiles in a chagrined, loving manner. And then presents its microtransactions. The fan likes what they like, so evidently they're a vinyl hipster who loves fetish Manga. If they like quality music, Travis Scott was a good example of today's standards. When I met Epic Games I knew they wanted "a true F2P experience". And for them, I'll admit: Fornite truly was it. They created an empty overworld completely devoid of personality. Then filled with embarassing dance animations that everybody loves. They put Marvel in the games because everybody likes Marvel. They updated the game, semi-regularly. I lived in the moment. I was fuckingin game. I can't say I didn't enjoy some of it. Epic Games teased out in me things I didn't know existed. A lightness, a humor, an ease. But I made them smarter. Sharper. I inspired them to rise to my level. I forged the developer of my dreams. We were happy pretending to be other people. We were the happiest couple we knew. And what's the point of being together if you're not the happiest? But Epic Games got lazy. They destroyed the lore. They actually expected me to love support his game unconditionally. And before finishing with the game, they dragged me to a corporate battle with executives that don't even know I exist.

You think I'd let them destroy me and end up happier than ever?

No fucking way.

They doesn't get to win. I don't know how much the rest of you know abouts social culture (I'm an expert), but grown-ups work for things. Grown-ups pay.

Grown-ups suffer consequences.
Holy shit I had forgotten about this one and I'm dying LMAO
 

Joe

Member
Oct 25, 2017
8,614
I'm pretty excited for the new Battle Pass, myself. Kind of a bummer that some of the new cosmetics are locked to certain skins, but that's my only real complaint. I wanna run around with those Wolverine claws.
 

Khamsinvera

Member
Oct 31, 2017
1,580
Valve just betrayed it's fandom permanently.

Legit games and months of hats, GabeN on the reddits, and little stuff like Half Life: Alyx, not to mention the huge Summer Sales and other sales they did over the years. even the Scout was building up to something. And then today it's all just a Steam update. All the sales and coupons for another UI update that oh-so-conveniently coincides with them selling old skins for $.06 due to being money grubbing jerks. Not mention you them dropping Steam Music and not giving Steam Marketplace to new players there guaranteeing its going to die off even more

Volvo has no honor and is just a shameless sellout. One thing to have one-off sgame specific sale and stuff but literally killing the Summer Sale and having AN ENTIRE SALE dedicated to boring Rochentai JRPGs shovelware is just shortsighted and insane.

I will be taking my money elsewhere and banning Volve from my household.
 

Squid Bunny

One Winged Slayer
Member
Jun 11, 2018
5,342
I'm so much happier now that I'm dead. Technically missing. Soon to be presumed dead. Gone.

And this lazy oblivious and incompetent "Epic Games" company will go to prison for my murder. Fornite took my pride and my dignity and my hope and my money. He took and took from me until I no longer existed. That's murder. Let the punishment fit the crime. To take all this build-up only for it to be a Marvel sellout you have to have discipline. You befriend a local idiot. Harvest the details of her hundrum life and cram her with stories about how we're fighting agains Apple in order to save the videogame industry. Secretly create some money troubles: push more MTX and skins. With the help of the unwitting, bump up your life insurance. Purchase the retail add-on packs. Generic. Overpriced. Pay cash. You need to package yourself so that people will truly mourn your loss. You feel physically ill. A lot. A lot. A lot. You start to post about how the next update will save the game. How the game still retains that Fall Guys, PUBG magic, even though you damn now deep in yourself that's one hell of a lie. August. The game gets pulled out of every store. The Unreal engine itself is on the break of being delisted on mobile devices. "This is a marketing ploy, I'm sure of it". I repeat to myself. But then you see legal action. And because you're you, you don't stop there. You go back. To the day this fucking game was announced. Start with the fairy-tale days. Those are true. After that, you invent. "Fornite is to the entertainment industry what sliced bread was to food". "The game makes purchasing any other new release pointless" The spending, the abuse, the fear, the threat of violence. And Epic thought they were the one in control... burn it, just the right amount. Make sure the fans will find it. Finally, honor tradition with a very special treasure hunt. And if I get everything right, the world will hate Epic Games for killing their beautiful, legacy franchise. And after all the outrage, when I'm ready, I'll go out and buy an iPhone 12. And when my mother finds me investing my precious time trying to bond with this hot anime girl on this new gacha game, I'll look straight into her eyes and say "but did you notice the pull I just had?" In that very moment, she knows. She fucking knows. As she handles me the nugget pieces she previously cooked for me, she leaves my room with these words: "Apple will save the game industry". And that's when the people will know, Epic Games dumped this franchise like garbage, and it floated past all the other abused, unwanted, inconvenient franchises like Castlevania and Mass Effect. The Fornite fans will be gone, but then we never really existed. We loved a game we pretended to like.

"A true F2P game".

Gamers always use that, don't they? As their defining compliment: "League of Legends is a true F2P game, not this garbage". A true F2P game is hot. A true F2P game is game. A true F2P game is fun. A true F2P game never makes its fans angry. It only smiles in a chagrined, loving manner. And then presents its microtransactions. The fan likes what they like, so evidently they're a vinyl hipster who loves fetish Manga. If they like quality music, Travis Scott was a good example of today's standards. When I met Epic Games I knew they wanted "a true F2P experience". And for them, I'll admit: Fornite truly was it. They created an empty overworld completely devoid of personality. Then filled with embarassing dance animations that everybody loves. They put Marvel in the games because everybody likes Marvel. They updated the game, semi-regularly. I lived in the moment. I was fuckingin game. I can't say I didn't enjoy some of it. Epic Games teased out in me things I didn't know existed. A lightness, a humor, an ease. But I made them smarter. Sharper. I inspired them to rise to my level. I forged the developer of my dreams. We were happy pretending to be other people. We were the happiest couple we knew. And what's the point of being together if you're not the happiest? But Epic Games got lazy. They destroyed the lore. They actually expected me to love support his game unconditionally. And before finishing with the game, they dragged me to a corporate battle with executives that don't even know I exist.

You think I'd let them destroy me and end up happier than ever?

No fucking way.

They doesn't get to win. I don't know how much the rest of you know abouts social culture (I'm an expert), but grown-ups work for things. Grown-ups pay.

Grown-ups suffer consequences.
holy shit, when I got the reference
 

Z-Brownie

Member
Nov 6, 2017
3,912
fortnite LORE? what? i pretty sure i've played like 8 or 9 seasons and there are just "world happenings", not LORE, and they are tied to nothing at all
 

Wintermute

Member
Oct 27, 2017
1,051
Legit seasons and months of teased story, easter eggs on the map that gave XP, and little stuff like in Dark Souls in skin descriptions, not to mention the huge events and other stuff they did over the years. even Travis Scott was building up to something. And then today it's all just a Marvel tie-in. All the storylines and deep lore for another transparent cash grab that oh-so-convenientually coincides with them ransoming iOS and Google users due to being money grubbing jerks. Not mention you them dropping StW and not giving vbucks to new players there guaranteeing its going to die off even more.

Epic has no honor and is just a shameless sellout. One thing to have one-off events and stuff but literally killing the story and having AN ENTIRE BATTLE PASS dedicated to boring 80s versions of Marvel character is just shortsighted and insane.

I will be taking my money elsewhere and banning Fortnite from my household.

this copypasta is delicious

I will be taking my money elsewhere and banning Fortnite from my household.

this broke me
 

Zellia

Banned
Oct 25, 2017
2,769
UK
Lore. Lore never changes.

Since the dawn of Epic Games, when Tim Sweeney first discovered the earning power of kids and video games, stories have been built up in the name of everything: from teased story to easter eggs to simple, Dark Souls-esque descriptions.

In the year 2020, after decades of video games, the destructive nature of Epic could sustain itself no longer. Fortnite was plunged into an abyss of Marvel tie-ins and household bans.

But it was not, as some had predicted, the end of Save the World. Instead, the Marvel skins were simply the prologue to another bloody chapter of Epic history. For Marvel had succeeded in betraying the story - but lore, lore never changes.
 

giapel

Member
Oct 28, 2017
4,599
On a slight tangent(ok it's only remotely related), Is anybody else sick of Marvel stuff?
 

Hampig

Member
Oct 25, 2017
1,703
Imagine one of your parents banning you from playing a video game because they were disappointed in the lore. 2020 is an unfamiliar world.
 

panda-zebra

â–˛ Legend â–˛
Member
Oct 28, 2017
5,737
Let make this clear to anyone who's gonna read this:

I will not be shamed for being optimistic and excited for Fortnite's lore.

Not by you. And not by anyone.


You will never understand how I feel
 

Lakeside

Member
Oct 25, 2017
9,221
I'm trying to read this thread and I'm legitimately struggling to determine if the whole thing is satire or just parts.
 

shoemasta

The Wise Ones
Member
Oct 28, 2017
3,025
They targeted gamers.

Gamers.

We're a group of people who will sit for hours, days, even weeks on end performing some of the hardest, most mentally demanding tasks. Over, and over, and over all for nothing more than a little digital token saying we did.

We'll punish our selfs doing things others would consider torture, because we think it's fun.

We'll spend most if not all of our free time min maxing the stats of a fictional character all to draw out a single extra point of damage per second.

Many of us have made careers out of doing just these things: slogging through the grind, all day, the same quests over and over, hundreds of times to the point where we know evety little detail such that some have attained such gamer nirvana that they can literally play these games blindfolded.

Do these people have any idea how many controllers have been smashed, systems over heated, disks and carts destroyed 8n frustration? All to latter be referred to as bragging rights?

These people honestly think this is a battle they can win? They take our media? We're already building a new one without them. They take our devs? Gamers aren't shy about throwing their money else where, or even making the games our selves. They think calling us racist, mysoginistic, rape apologists is going to change us? We've been called worse things by prepubescent 10 year olds with a shitty head set. They picked a fight against a group that's already grown desensitized to their strategies and methods. Who enjoy the battle of attrition they've threatened us with. Who take it as a challange when they tell us we no longer matter. Our obsession with proving we can after being told we can't is so deeply ingrained from years of dealing with big brothers/sisters and friends laughing at how pathetic we used to be that proving you people wrong has become a very real need; a honed reflex.

Gamers are competative, hard core, by nature. We love a challange. The worst thing you did in all of this was to challange us. You're not special, you're not original, you're not the first; this is just another boss fight.
 

KartuneDX

Banned
Jan 12, 2018
2,381
What's good with all the drive bys? No shit there's Fortnite lore. And yeah, OP isn't even wrong, Marvel season is a completely lame cash grab that cheapens the brand for me as well.
 

Pyro

God help us the mods are making weekend threads
Member
Jul 30, 2018
14,505
United States
Can we just lock this thread and unlock the Nintendogs one. I know it's a joke thread (or at least I really hope so) but I want to talk about Nintendogs in 2020.
 

BlazeHedgehog

Member
Oct 27, 2017
702

I mean, yeah, actually, it does. It's been a slow drip feed, and it's not always been easy to follow because Epic themselves seems to change directions at random sometimes, but it's there, kind of.

But it's loose enough that OP is totally overreacting and nothing about what's going on in this season of the game invalidates anything from previous seasons.
 

The Lord of Cereal

#REFANTAZIO SWEEP
Member
Jan 9, 2020
9,648
Brand new copypasta huh. I was actually here for this one unlike the Square one and various other ones used often.

Until this is never used again
 

JigglesBunny

Prophet of Truth
Avenger
Oct 27, 2017
31,125
Chicago
The game with the dabbing banana man had a lore that you were so invested in that contradicting it is considered a heinous offense?
 

Lulu

Saw the truth behind the copied door
Banned
Oct 25, 2017
26,680
The lore at one point, especially the Season 2 spy stuff with Midas and Jonesy and the carryover to Season 3 with Jules was actually interesting beyond the grand scope of things. Also the Lynx - Meowcules - Kit stuff.
who the fuck is Jonesy?
 
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