Empathy is the most beautiful of feelings

[Wackamole]

Not that people that don't cry at movies are "pieces of shit" I guess what I really want to talk about is, how do we find people like our selves?

At first glance I feel like I come off as an aggressive person, I have very "angry eyebrows" I sometimes rock a goatee, I have a well muscular upper body, and I generally don't smile.
So far in life, I feel like I've only had aggressive type friends, and rarely have we agreed politically or emotionally.
Idk

I guess, how do I find people I can truly vibe with

Click to shrink...

It's highly probable that these guys also have feelings but are afraid to show it because of toxic masculinity.
But it's interesting that people are different and react differently. All my friends are different from me. And my girlfriend is as well. Surely you don't want to date yourself, right?

I have some really tough guys as friends. But they're also really emotional about certain stuff. They cry at movies and funerals and all that stuff.
Personally, i'm not much of a tough guy, but i never cry (i feel the urge a lot, but then adrenaline simply takes over). I do feel i'm very sensitive to what happens around me and with other people.
Maybe if you showed more interest towards other people, they would open up more and show their emotions more.
Do you guys talk about what gets you emotional?

 

[Vibed]

Not specifically related to empathy I suppose, but I was having a particularly rough night tonight, and I found this article that spoke to me and moved me on a level deeper than I've felt in a while. I encourage everyone to read all of it.

https://highline.huffingtonpost.com/articles/en/how-to-help-someone-who-is-suicidal/

Reading this makes me try to take a deeper look at what it means to truly have empathy for someone, and I believe it in the same hand as altruism, takes kinship and effort. An ability to selflessly invest yourself in others' problems and listen. Avoid judging, or at least reflect on every judgment you make with an air of skeptic reflection. But I think what's the hardest is keeping an unrelenting optimism and belief in other people. When you believe, you show you understand what they go through yet haven't given up on them all the same. Obviously that applies more to the suicidal and depressed, but I think keeping that optimism for everyone you can is the most beautiful thing. No doubt there are lines where you have to go against that optimism for your own safety, but holding it up as an ideal is much better than falling prey to cynicism, even if it means remaining hopeful of those you've already been forced to cut off.

I've seen understated examples of such genuine empathy here on this forum and it reminds me to be my kindest and most consistent with those in my life who only take up my momentary thoughts.

 

[Ragnar]

For me, empathy is the most important trait in a person. Specifically I gravitate towards people with wide-reaching empathy, covering not only their fellow humans, but other kinds of animals as well. And not just the cute ones.

In fact, I love my girlfriend in large part because she's one of the most empathetic people I know.

 

[Deleted member 2210]

Almost did me. And in response I tried to kill off my empathy for a while, but just couldn't. Now I know it was my wrong expectations that hurt me. These experiences will have taught you to discern those worthy of your empathy from those that are not. I know that is how it worked out for me.

Click to shrink...

honestly want to print this post and frame it
ive lower my expectations so much that im even surprised when someone asks how im doing.

 

[Lunchbox-]

in most cases you had to experience it in your life to feel real empathy

and that breaks your heart

 

[thetrin]

As I've gotten older, I've become more and more empathetic, which I love, but it does complicate things sometimes. Especially when you want desperately to help someone, but you know you can't, and you just have to stand there and watch them crumble in front of you.

That is easily one of the most soul crushing feelings I've ever had.

If anything, the part I'm bad at is not feeling empathy, and having to take care of myself before others. That has hurt me a lot, especially recently.