Does finding gay porn disgusting make you homophobic?

[CDX]

I'd classify myself as a 100% gay male. I wouldn't say I'm "disgusted" by straight porn or even lesbian porn, I'm just completely uninterested in it. I personally find it odd to be "disgusted" either way by what other people do sexually. "Completely uninterested in it" is how I'd describe my feelings about straight or lesbian porn.

You're not personally involved in the situation, nobody is doing anything to you, or having you do anything to them. So feeling "disgust" over just observing something I personally find to be a pretty strong feeling.

I think there's a difference between being repulsed by it

vs

Not caring for it/it doing nothing for you

I don't think finding gay porn disgusting makes you "hate gay people" but that feeling of being disgusted by it 100% comes from a space of homophobia. Likely more subconcious/cultural. Does that makes sense?

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Yeah, Tawpguns post mirrors my thoughts about it.

 

[Poppy]

i think it's enough to merely not like something

 

[-COOLIO-]

yeah your friend is probably at least a little homophobic. at worst, it should feel just boring or non-titillating.

 

[Ravelle]

The porn Venn diagram is big, there is a lot of both gay sex and straight sex that ranges from hot to gross depending on the defining filters you click on and is subjective ( No kink shaming)

You're not the demographic, thats cool but there is no need to be agressive toward it.

 

[Indy in the Fridge]

i mean, i'm not going to go as far as to call it disgusting but it is fair to say it isn't in my wheelhouse of what i like in porn

 

[nopattern]

If a straight person told me gay porn is disgusting in conversation, I'd probably lay into them about that. disgusting is a strong word, it comes off as a homophobic to me. I compltely get someone straight not wanting anything to do with gay porn, but words matter.

 

[carlsojo]

Your friend "accidentally" turned on gay porn.

Uhhh huhhhhh.

 

[Patitoloco]

its only disgusting when your step brother joins in.

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Honest question, I wonder if the stepbro/sister/mom/dad is as big in the lesbian/gay community as it's right now.

I kinda don't want to look it out lol

 

[StraySheep]

I think it is OK to think it is disgusting as long as you are fine with it existing.

 

[Maolfunction]

As a gay guy, I don't think it's weird for straight guys to not find gay porn appealing, but I do wonder what your threshold is for the disgust to creep in.

Do you find it disgusting when two men are kissing? That's a red flag for me. Two men being intimate while naked, without sex happening? It's a bit understandable, but I wouldn't want to be friends with someone disgusted by that personally. But that's just me looking out for myself.

Once things actually get to the point of sex happening, alright, that's fine, obviously that can be a big turn off, I've seen enough portrayals of straight sex to know the feeling from the opposite angle. I wouldn't classify that feeling as disgust, more just an understanding that this isn't arousing me in any meaningful way and it's kinda gross in a generic all porn is gross sort of way.

 

[Deleted member 47160]

Yeah, don't use the word disgusting since it can be extremely triggering to gay people. We feel like you are saying "being gay is disgusting" since we are so used to people acting that way. Choose your words more carefully. Be more conscious of your gay friends' struggles. I know you have no idea as a straight person, but try.

 

[Ctrl Alt Del]

I find quite a lot of porn to be disgusting. But if you think something vanilla like kissing and humping to be disgusting then I guess you should try to understand why. Therapy?

 

[Pai Pai Master]

Honest question, I wonder if the stepbro/sister/mom/dad is as big in the lesbian/gay community.

I kinda don't want to look it out lol

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it's not I think straight people just don't have a lot of options for non-vanilla porn lol so incest is an easy taboo to throw in and raise the stakes

 

[Tbm24]

Calling it disgusting raises big flags for me personally. Like, I get it, it's not your thing that's cool. It's not mine, but I'm not disgusted by it. Why should I be?

 

[Ferrio]

Sex is disgusting period. It's just which parts we're willing to put up with.

 

[jdmc13]

I see porn as being like food. There are an infinite number of varieties: some I like, some I don't like. My taste is my taste; your taste is your taste. Not liking the same food only means we don't like the same food. Nothing more.

 

[EssBeeVee]

it's not I think straight people just don't have a lot of options for non-vanilla porn lol so incest is an easy taboo to throw in and raise the stakes

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they should just take the same porn and change the title. lol

 

[Pai Pai Master]

they should just take the same porn and change the title. lol

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yeah lol. i know plenty of straight people who watch gay porn though. idk why specifically there's so much straight incest porn

 

[take_marsh]

"Disgusting" is a strong word and should be saved for something like bestiality. It conveys an immoral activity.

"Turn off" is the best term to use. Gay porn is a big turn-off for me, for example.

 

[Starphanluke]

As a gay man:

Reacting like that to gay porn doesn't make you homophobic. I would react the same way to straight porn. Calling it disgusting is a bit much and has some connotations with it, but in context I understand what you're saying.

 

[Apollo]

If somebody called it disgusting, I probably would think they're homophobic. But it's of course ok not to get off to it because everybody's got different preferences.

 

[Bluelote]

yes thinking more, disgusting is a strong word specially because you are going with a generalization in "gay porn".

 

[The Albatross]

IMO, no, but "disgusting" is a stronger word than the one I'd use -- aversion.

People have preferences and aversions, especially when it comes to something like sexual desires, interests, kinks. I wouldn't say I'm "disgusted" by gay porn, but I have a personal aversion to it. But I also have an aversion to *a lot* of hetereosexual porn. The entire takeover of porn with "FATHER SHOWS STEP DAUGHTER WHAT TO Do..." is like, a strong, strong aversion for me, enough that I'd call *that* disgusting before gay porn. And I know all of it is fake, too, it's just a stupid title to try to appeal to somebody's kink, but that whole framing it of really, really turns me off. THere's a whole littany of kinks that if I'm watching some porn and one of those kinks comes up, I'll say in my head like "oh, gross," and switch to something else, but I wouldn't like ... actively share with someone else that I'd have that "ugh gross" thought in my head, because who knows, different strokes for different folks that kink that causes a quick visceral reaction in my lizard brain might be their thing.

 

[Mr Spasiba]

Disgusting is a strong ass word when you can just say it's not something you're trying to see. I'd raise an eyebrow at someone using phrasing like that.

 

[Deleted member 23212]

Does hetero porn disgust you? If it doesn't but gay porn does, it appears to me that the homosexual part of it is the the factor, so yes.

 

[IMCaprica]

If you use the word "disgusting" to describe your feelings then yes.

 

[Dandy]

I'm gay and I don't find straight porn disgusting. Sometimes it's pretty hot!

 

[Grouch Douglass]

I think people are off topic a bit. It shouldn't matter what is actually said. Isn't the actual question whether or not your initial reaction to seeing some gay porn is one of disgust and is that ok?

 

[BringBackSonics]

If its not your thing..Its not your thing ...will agree with others the usage of 'disguist' is strong.

 

[Lost Lemurian]

While I can almost guarantee that the source of any straight man finding gay porn "disgusting" is likely latent homophobia ingrained in him over a lifetime, I personally find any porn between two people whom I find physically unattractive to be "disgusting". Again, though, if you're absolutely repelled by the bodies two nominally attractive men, it's likely because the fear of being perceived as gay is deeply implanted in you. Thus, yeah, "homophobic", by definition.

 

[Deleted member 49611]

I wouldn't say it's disgusting. It ain't my thing so if I see a guy blowing another guy...I just nope out. If that's someone else's turn on then whatever doesn't bother me.

There is nothing wrong with having your own sexuality and not liking things. Just don't be insensitive or an ass about it. Everyone is into different stuff and that's cool.

 

[aevanhoe]

I'd classify myself as a 100% gay male. I wouldn't say I'm "disgusted" by straight porn or even lesbian porn, I'm just completely uninterested in it. I personally find it odd to be "disgusted" either way by what other people do sexually.

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Exactly this. I think some people are using the word "disgust" to describe the sensation of an attack on their fragile self image of masculinity caused by homosexuality - and there is a word for that: homophobia. And yeah, it's mostly masculinity - I rarely hear straight women have such feelings toward gay or lesbian porn - it's usually the men who are "disgusted" and like to broadcast it.

I'm not proud of it, but when I was a kid I found anything gay related "disgusting" because I felt it undermined my manhood somehow (yeah, I know). So I know what this word means in this context. When I grew up, thankfully, I realized this is all bullshit and that being gay is perfectly normal - so now I really don't find anything about gay porn "disgusting" at all. I'm not into it, but I wouldn't have any problem watching gay porn and would probably just find it uninteresting, if anything. Same as you with the other kind of porn.

So yeah, the more I think about it - finding it "disgusting" is homophobic, totally. Not getting turned on by it is not.

 

[Abdiel]

I have enough issues with my own body that seeing most straight porn tends to weird me out.

Gay porn is totally unappealing... But I know that's all it is. Unappealing. It doesn't flip any switches. Doesn't mean I think it's gross or disgusting. I think it's more the reflexive use of that terminology that should be considered.

Probably look at words that capture the perspective without sounding like it's inherently negative.

 

[Devilgunman]

I'm not disgusted by it but I do have preference what kind of porn I want to watch.

 

[Deleted member 81119]

I think it's fine. Like...do you actually think it's gross, or is it just a major turn off?

 

[HustleBun]

It makes me feel unsettled and disinterested, but I don't think "disgusting" is a very nice word.

I think it's just seeing something that I'm not used to or didn't grow up around. I remember watching Queer as Folk (US) and being really taken aback initially but after a while it became kind of normalized for me and I didn't even react to it.

It doesn't make you homophobic unless you inherently feel that it's immortal, wrong or it angers you. It's just not your thing and that's ok. But don't use "disgusting" to describe it even if that's your own feeling.

 

[Messi]

Accidentally turned on gay porn?

Sure Jan

Also describing it as disgusting is wrong and makes me think you are young.

 

[WascallyWabbit]

In your context using the word disgusting is prob a bit strong but I wouldn't say necessarily problematic

But if someone just threw that word out there and said gay porn is disgusting I think it would be wrong

 

[cyress8]

Sex is only disgusting when someone shit themselves and even then some see the beauty in it.

 

[Violence Jack]

I'm not into gay or lesbian porn, but calling it disgusting sounds like one of those pearl-clutching conservative christians who don't even like seeing gay people hold hands in public.

 

[nitewulf]

I think it's a matter of differentiation between not finding it arousing vs finding it icky. The former is normal, I believe the latter is due to our social conditioning. You have to wonder why we find it disgusting (if we do), is that an innate feeling? Or was that conditioned into us by constantly being taught its not normal, it's not "godly"? Hence we identify that as dirty or unclean. I also think similar issue exists such as types of beauty we define as attractive, or sexual preferences based on race. I believe these are all conditioned behaviors rather than innate.

 

[Excuse me]

yeah your friend is probably at least a little homophobic. at worst, it should feel just boring or non-titillating.

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Dunno, I guess it depends what kind of porn he has been watching. I find lot of straight porn disgusting and I'm straight.

 

[XaviConcept]

Seems pretty obvious but Im sure a bunch of homophobes will hide behind that excuse.

If I was into watching gay porn, my guess is I would probably be gay or bi. Im not so I dont but that doesnt take away my love and support for the gay community.

I guess people have a hard time making the distinction between "I dont like this" and "I dont support this" and make them mutually exclusive?

 

[Rendering...]

Finding gay porn "disgusting" seems awfully similar to the kind of gut-level aversion some homophobes feel toward gay people in general, so...

I'm gay, and I don't get grossed out when I watch straight people kissing or having sex. It's not what turns me on, but why would I feel disgusted?

That's one thing that gets me about homophobes. Like, how sensitive must you be if you've gotta have your tastes shared and validated by everyone around you? I live in a world where straight romance and sex is normalized 24/7 in media and real life, and somehow I don't feel nauseous all the time. Could it be that I'm a well adjusted person who doesn't get childishly grossed out by a different sexual orientation? Could it be that I can appreciate women without being sexually attracted to them?

You can't even claim it's the butt stuff that makes gay sex uniquely "gross," because plenty of straight porn has butt play too. And you can hardly reduce gay sex to anal sex alone.

As far as sex goes, I feel disgusted by fisting, poop, and barf. Notice a difference between that, and getting disgusted by the full range of gay porn?

Then again, maybe you guys were just watching bad porn lol. Come to think of it, that totally plausible, because there's so much skeezy porn out there. I wouldn't trust a group of straight guys to select porn with handsome models that have good screen chemistry.

 

[mikhailguy]

Porn tropes in general are disgusting, but we probably get desensitized -- then seeing it in a different context makes it surreal.

 

[Emergency & I]

I find a lot of porn to be pretty unappealing.

To answer your question, it's not really homophobic unless deemed disgusting for homophobic reasons. An 'I'm disgusted' reaction is a strong one but anyone is entitled to 'being disgusted' by something if it makes them feel that way (especially since the type of content in porn is super broad). They don't need to spread the 'disgusting' comment, but it's up to them not to watch.

There's an element of social conditioning going on here obviously, but as evidenced by this thread: a lot of people find porn disgusting (or unappealing) in totality.

 

[Menchi]

Detach this from porn, as the inherently sex based nature there gives plenty of reasons for disgust etc for those uncomfortable with sex/porn etc

If there is a gay love scene in a film, with visibly naked men engaging in sex, does that inspire revulsion and a need to switch the channel?

If so, I'd say that definitely comes from a place of homophobia, especially considering how prominent straight sex scenes have been in films.

 

[HiLife]

Disgust is the not word I'd use. It just doesn't arouse me, don't see why I would describe it as anything else.

 

[Razmos]

I think its childish as fuck to find something like that disgusting and speaks volumes to be honest.
Lesbian porn does nothing for me but there is nothing disgusting about it

 

[SageShinigami]

Homophobia comes in a variety of ways. I'm bi but seeing two dudes I'm not attracted to make out used to cause a bit of recoil when I first accepted I was bi. I didn't have a "problem" with it that I would vocalize but really you should have a neutral reaction instead of being grossed out. Like if you saw a hetero couple kiss in real life you wouldn't think anything of it. I eventually got over it, but the shit is gets in your mind and you don't even realize it.

Anyway, yeah saying you find gay porn "disgusting" is very much in that same vein. Like you're already on a porn site. You see straight porn you're not interested in all the time, just click over. Plus what dodgy ass porn site doesn't separate their porn these days?