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Do you have high aspirations?
- Thread starter Blue Skies
- Start date
It has taken me a really long time to come to terms with the idea that there's a vast difference between wanting the title and prestige of being something like a doctor, professor, or lawyer rather than actually wanting to do the job day in and day out.
It sounds pretty basic but I think our society can pressure lots of people when we are younger into those more "prestigious" fields that in our adulthood we may end up feeling like a bit of a failure when we obviously don't follow those paths.
So now I try to think on things that are self actualization goals more than anything - real bucket list items. Try to strive for public service (volunteering), expanding friend groups, learning instruments/languages, appreciating the arts, continue learning on subjects of interest and that sort of thing.
It sounds pretty basic but I think our society can pressure lots of people when we are younger into those more "prestigious" fields that in our adulthood we may end up feeling like a bit of a failure when we obviously don't follow those paths.
So now I try to think on things that are self actualization goals more than anything - real bucket list items. Try to strive for public service (volunteering), expanding friend groups, learning instruments/languages, appreciating the arts, continue learning on subjects of interest and that sort of thing.
Yes and no. I have had a few issues that have put me behind in life. I just want a nice house, married to my fiance, healthy and a job that I like.. And I am working towards it. Graduate in three months, move to his country in July and have a house deposit developing quite nicely.
Nah, I'm a bum and will always be a bum. Realizing that makes you realize aspirations are a waste of time.
I've reached peak because I can now say to my own mother, "I can evict you, you know that right?"
Everything else seems meaningless.
Everything else seems meaningless.
I aspired high when I was younger and achieved everything I wanted by this point in my life. I have my PhD, record of published material, work as a senior scientist, etc. From here on, if I want to keep climbing the ladder, I need to actually step back from what I love and move more into project management or corporate track. Im happy today, but deep inside me, I know that some day I will have a change of mindset and start aspiring towards this new career path.
I'm only aspiring to find a new job...I've been searching since May and have only had interviews at 3 places (turned down a 4th). I'm fighting to not quit every day but it's super hard. I know how screwed I'll be if I quit without lining something else up, though.
Used to have huge aspirations of managing a mutual/hedge fund one day. A lot of people at various places I've worked with hear that and funnily enough, they tell me that they'd like to invest with me some day haha.
Used to have huge aspirations of managing a mutual/hedge fund one day. A lot of people at various places I've worked with hear that and funnily enough, they tell me that they'd like to invest with me some day haha.
All that I want out of life is a nice, stable manner of living. I do have goals, but I really wouldn't call them aspirational.
My aspiration is to be the very best me I can be.
I emphasize "be" because I feel too much of the time in our society, we associate achievement with "doing". Perhaps that's how we can most easily measure our accomplishments against others. But measuring against ourselves, what we can be as cognizant, socially-aware creatures is, IMO, at least as important in determining how far we've come in life. (This where those archaic concepts such as wisdom and sensibility still hold currency.)
I emphasize "be" because I feel too much of the time in our society, we associate achievement with "doing". Perhaps that's how we can most easily measure our accomplishments against others. But measuring against ourselves, what we can be as cognizant, socially-aware creatures is, IMO, at least as important in determining how far we've come in life. (This where those archaic concepts such as wisdom and sensibility still hold currency.)
Sorry, I should have been clearer in my comment. I just meant, that as I understand it, OP is asking if people have high aspirations.. as in career etc. You answered you want to leave the world a better place, but that has little to do with having a well paying job or some position. Leaving the world behind better can be achieved through a lot of ways.
That's all I meant :)
Depends on how you see it. My aspirations are to live a quiet life with a decent enough amount of money. Nothing ludicrous. I'd be happy to stay how I am right now. That in itself is not an easy task.
Depends on which part of my life.
In regards of work, I feel like I already reached or surpassed my aspirations. Only thing left is an early pension.
In regards of private life, I have high aspirations in regards to learning new stuff and expanding my hobbies.
In regards of work, I feel like I already reached or surpassed my aspirations. Only thing left is an early pension.
In regards of private life, I have high aspirations in regards to learning new stuff and expanding my hobbies.
The main goal I'm working towards right now is nigh unattainable, if not outright impossible from my perspective, but outside of that I wouldn't say I do. I'm not where I need to be in life yet, but once I'm there, it won't be very hard or prestigious in my opinion. Just a comfy life is all I need.
I was a high achiever then I stopped wanting for much of anything pretty early on. I achieved the only goals I ever really desired and after that all the drive sadly fizzled out. I'm still figuring out the next step, and what I do because I felt like I HAVE to (remenants of high achieving mindset without the passion or motivation) vs what I do because I WANT to. Given what I've failed because I couldn't find will to try, its very difficult, and I'm struggling to quell my pride without crushing my self-esteem further.
I turned 36 this october and i'm somewhat done with this life.
That's not to say i want to end it or anything. I like my life and will be happy to live a long time.
But i achievedalmost everything i really want to and need.
- I have a job that pays well enough
- i have a payed of house
- i have a girlfriend
- i safe money and pay into my retirement fund
Outside of kids or unforseen difficulties i can somewhat cruise along for the next 35 years without changing much.
Sure i could work harder to get more money so that i can buy a better set of the things i already have. I have a car and a house. Sure i can always buy another one but i don't see the need for that at all.
I'm happy with what i have. My brother works hard to have a bigger house and more vacations but that's something i don't care enough about.
I feel like i'm just kicking water, not getting forward but on the other side i'm not interested in the things i could get for doing more.
I hate this uncertainty of mine.
That's not to say i want to end it or anything. I like my life and will be happy to live a long time.
But i achievedalmost everything i really want to and need.
- I have a job that pays well enough
- i have a payed of house
- i have a girlfriend
- i safe money and pay into my retirement fund
Outside of kids or unforseen difficulties i can somewhat cruise along for the next 35 years without changing much.
Sure i could work harder to get more money so that i can buy a better set of the things i already have. I have a car and a house. Sure i can always buy another one but i don't see the need for that at all.
I'm happy with what i have. My brother works hard to have a bigger house and more vacations but that's something i don't care enough about.
I feel like i'm just kicking water, not getting forward but on the other side i'm not interested in the things i could get for doing more.
I hate this uncertainty of mine.
God, fuck no.
I just wanna exist and live in decent comfort.
I've never wanted to be someone.
Just to be.
I just wanna exist and live in decent comfort.
I've never wanted to be someone.
Just to be.
Yes, and i cant think of a period in my life when i was generally more unhappy than right now.
Not moment to moment, but in general.
Maybe i just really need a vacation.
Not moment to moment, but in general.
Maybe i just really need a vacation.
Hard to say... I used to think my goals were ambitious as a kid. I wanted to be a pro artist. I wanted to make influential media that inspires people. I wanted to be a game developer. I wanted to have a best friend who really understood me. I wanted to be cool and confident. I wanted to have my own place with a game room and an art room and eat ice cream whenever I wanted. I wanted to go on adventures.
Now I actually achieved all those things. But from the outside looking in it doesn't always seem too decadent or anything. I could tell you i bought a modest 2-bedroom apartment, i have a boyfriend, I make 3D assets all day for a big company, i earn about £25,000/y, i travel sometimes, i have a group of friends i really like, i have a fridge-freezer and a purple sweater dress that i think looks cute. I have everything I ever wanted. Now I don't really know what else I want. Bigger house? More time to game? Trip to japan? Fuck I would like that actually yeah.
But in my early 20s i used to work really really hard thinking I still needed to do more even after I had my job. I thought I needed to like get a website and work on my own franchise and personal brand or whatever. I'd get home from work and try to work on comics and shit for hours. Started trying to design a game. Designed business pitches. Even though running a business would be stressful and I just wanted to chill and play games. At some point I just decided to try doing whatever I felt like when I got home from work, just chill and play games and watch tv. And yknow, my life really improved lol.
I think this is very true. I think as a kid you get told what you want and its all very theoretical and there's also this feeling like you owe big success and prestige to like your parents or society or something. You get taught that being unproductive in careers or relationships is somehow... immoral. As you get older you might learn that looking after yourself, learning and improving, figuring out happiness and trying to share those things with the world is a much better value for a person.
Now I actually achieved all those things. But from the outside looking in it doesn't always seem too decadent or anything. I could tell you i bought a modest 2-bedroom apartment, i have a boyfriend, I make 3D assets all day for a big company, i earn about £25,000/y, i travel sometimes, i have a group of friends i really like, i have a fridge-freezer and a purple sweater dress that i think looks cute. I have everything I ever wanted. Now I don't really know what else I want. Bigger house? More time to game? Trip to japan? Fuck I would like that actually yeah.
But in my early 20s i used to work really really hard thinking I still needed to do more even after I had my job. I thought I needed to like get a website and work on my own franchise and personal brand or whatever. I'd get home from work and try to work on comics and shit for hours. Started trying to design a game. Designed business pitches. Even though running a business would be stressful and I just wanted to chill and play games. At some point I just decided to try doing whatever I felt like when I got home from work, just chill and play games and watch tv. And yknow, my life really improved lol.
I think this is very true. I think as a kid you get told what you want and its all very theoretical and there's also this feeling like you owe big success and prestige to like your parents or society or something. You get taught that being unproductive in careers or relationships is somehow... immoral. As you get older you might learn that looking after yourself, learning and improving, figuring out happiness and trying to share those things with the world is a much better value for a person.
My ultimate goal is so lofty when I told my ex what it was she laughed at the impossibility of it.
I think I tend to be pretty ambitious. And I've only gotten happier the more I advance but I don't think I will ever be content, I'll need to continue to grow.
I will never understand how some people can be at the same position for 10+ years and be fine with that being the best they will ever be.
I will never understand how some people can be at the same position for 10+ years and be fine with that being the best they will ever be.
Yes, but it took my brain long so long to figure out my creative process that I'm now far too old to find fame and success. At least, should I finally finish, I think the work will be able to speak for itself.
I lived long enough to see the end of the MCU Avengers movie timeline. I should live long enough to watch the new Star Wars trilogy. Those were really good goals for me 4 years ago. I guess now the goal is to make it another 6 years.
Not now. I'm not aspirational in general and would have been happy after college with my legal assistant job making $15 an hour in upstate NY with my own apartment but my now wife got me to go to law school, move to Long Island, get a good job and buy a house. I'm 33 now and at this point am happy with just riding out the next 30+ years at my government job and hopefully collect a pension when I'm done. Do work on my house, have money to buy stuff that I want and try to just live a life of little stress. If I get promotions along the way at my agency then that'll be great but if not I'm happy where I'm at.
