I've had cats most of my life and I feel like I've always had a really good ability to bond with them and understand their wants. Recently, my wife and I adopted a kitten. He was 6 months old when we got him, he's now 11 months old. Unlike any other cat I've ever met or had, he HATES to be touched.
In general, he is frightened of nearly everything. Loud noises, sudden movements, etc. He is generally OK with being around me and my wife, but if we get too close or look like we're going to try to touch or pet him, he runs away. It's like he's totally cool with us if we're 3-5 feet away from him, but any closer and we're suddenly untrustworthy heh. We talk to him constantly when he's around us and I try to get low to the ground so I'm not towering above him to show I'm not a threat. He will get closer to me than normal in that situation, but will instantly run away if I put out my hand.
My wife gives him a treat daily and he'll eat it from her hand and will tolerate being petted then, but as soon as he's done he runs away. He is ultra suspicious of me if I try to give him a treat. He doesn't seem to be super into playing with us, though we can get him to chase a string if we are persistent. At night though, he plays with the toys we've bought him or he goes into the kitchen and finds a paper towel to tear up.
We've never heard him purr and I've only ever heard him meow once the entire time we've had him. Other than these personality issues, he's extremely well behaved. He kinda looks like a stray because we can't brush or pet him, so his fur is kind of raggedy lol but again, very well-behaved.
What's the deal with this cat lol. Anyone have any ideas on other ways we might be able to bond with him? I get it will take time and effort, which is fine, I just don't know if it's better to sort of leave it up to him to make the move when he's ready or if there are things we can do to make it easier...