Bereavement leaves for pets

[julia crawford]

So what do people think about this? My company does not have a policy for this, but when my cat passed away some time ago i was pretty much told to work as i can and take whatever time i needed off. But there being nothing written down makes me a little queasy, especially since imo this should be recognized officially. It absolutely fucking sucks to lose a pet and i'm not able to work when it happens.

 

[Griffith]

If I ran a company, I'd treat it as someone losing a family member, because they did. Give them a few days off, offer a small care-package gift and pay my respects.

Sorry about your loss. I've lost a few pets over the years so I understand that feeling all too well. What I try to tell myself and my family, is that we did all we could for them, and they lived a happy life. I also try to remember the good or funny moments we had. Mixing a bit of laughter with the tears can help mend the spirit a little.

 

[Ashes of Dreams]

Yeah, it should be recognized. When my cat died last year I needed a few days off. I also have a memory of a few years ago I had a co-worker who really loved her pets and her cat died but she kept working and... well, that shift turned into her crying while showing me pictures of her cat.

 

[The October Man]

It should absolutley be a standard thing. I was a mess when we lost our cat recently. I had to take a few "sick days"

 

[skeezx]

my company after 40 years just now started implementing bereavement, for immediate family i believe. if i lost a pet i'd just put that under personal time off myself, to be honest.

i know it's not fair but just the way it is

 

[John Dunbar]

If I ran a company, I'd treat it as someone losing a family member, because they did. Give them a few days off, offer a small care-package gift and pay my respects.

Click to shrink...

i'd buy hundreds of hamsters.

 

[Elfgore]

It would be nice. My old cat is getting pretty close most likely and I know I'm going to be a complete wreck when he goes.

 

[Lobster Roll]

It should absolutley be a standard thing. I was a mess when we lost our cat recently. I had to take a few "sick days"

Click to shrink...

Agreed, and same here. But my boss is a really great person and just let me take the rest of the week off, no questions asked. She absorbed my workload too and told me to take as much time as I needed.

Pets are family. Losing a family member is devastating.

 

[Spectral Glider]

My dog recently had surgery, and all I could think of that day at work was how I wanted to leave and know if she was ok. I can't imagine what I'll be like when the end comes.

 

[natjjohn]

Yeah, couldn't support bereavement leave for pets. Take personal/vacation time. Can't elevate pets to the same level as humans.

 

[nekkid]

i'd buy hundreds of hamsters.

Click to shrink...

Unfortunately I think the ambiguity and exploitability are why it's not a standard thing.

 

[Soda]

I've never heard of any company offering bereavement leave for the death of a pet, and the idea has never crossed my mind.

I think it's a nice idea and would support it of course, but I suspect the length of time for leave would be shorter than for the death of a human family member. The main logic being, if, say, a spouse dies, you now hold all of their responsibilities on your shoulders (e.g. income, chores, childcare, etc), whereas with a pet dying, you probably have fewer responsibilities excluding any financial or end-of-life duties. Obviously, the emotional toll can be just as significant for a pet as for a human, though, which is why I'd still support pet bereavement leave.

Edit: for people worried about employees exploiting it by having a bunch of hamsters or fish or something, just limit it to something like 3 days a year. It sucks for people with tons of pets, but I assume getting 3 days off a year would cover most people pretty well as I doubt the average person has more than one pet death per year (thinking in terms of cats and dogs here).

 

[Pinku]

With my old boss I would tell her what happend and she'd give me a couple of days off. With my current one I would just call in sick rest of the week.

 

[Rosebud]

A professor didn't marked me as "absent" when I had to take my dog to the vet (sadly she passed away some years ago), I'm very grateful.

 

[Faenix1]

By law pets are property. Until *that* changes then I'd never expect a company to care, until then you just gotta hope your boss is understanding. Or lie.

 

[Jedi2016]

My company doesn't have an official policy on this, but I know people that take a day or two of vacation when it happens. My boss has done it, and I know he won't have any problems letting me have a couple days when the time comes. Then again I'm also in a position where I have a lot of vacation, and I can get away with just saying "I'm taking the rest of the week off."

Can't elevate pets to the same level as humans.

Click to shrink...

Clearly you don't have any pets.

 

[Kitsunebaby]

I've already told my new job that I'm gonna have to take a day or two off when any of my pets go. I work a customer facing role, and I would be a crying mess.

 

[wenis]

Sure. Why not. The critters are a part of your family.

 

[Vonocourt]

I'm deeply worried about this because my dog is seventeen.

I don't want to get paid, but I don't want to get a demerit for it.

 

[Makkah]

As an HR Manager (and animal lover) it's not something I never gave much thought to. I'll raise it with our COO tomorrow.

 

[ConradCervantes]

I wish it were the case with more companies. My cat died this January and it happened to coincide with a COVID quarantine that shut my office down for a week. I was a complete wreck so I was more than willing to shut myself inside my place for a week and grieve.

 

[Merriweather]

We lost our older cat to a very aggressive nasal tumor about a month ago and I absolutely could have used a couple days to get through it. But being a somewhat new employee, I'm only given a handful of all-purpose "vacation" days so I couldn't really use them because I'm saving them for a trip to see my family for the first time in 20 months.

 

[Richietto]

Losing a pet can be brutal so sure. Like you really gonna tell someone they don't need time off for a pet they have had for 15+ years? My cat is 17 years old which means I have had her since I was 10. When she passes I will be an absolute fuckin wreck.

 

[PlanetSmasher]

When my dog Max died I was in the middle of an improv class and I had a complete meltdown on stage. If I was working when my cat Luke died I would have TAKEN time off to grieve - I literally cancelled a date that evening because I was inconsolable.

If the company lets you do it, I say do it. If they try to penalize you later, just make sure you have a record of being told it was okay, in writing, by your manager and you should be fine.

 

[supremeplatypus]

Pets have varying lifespans. I doubt companies will give you time off just because a small rodent pet like hamsters, gerbils or rats died. Not everyone sticks with the traditional dog or cat. I love rats and am going to keep rats in future because it's fun to watch their social dynamics and they are the smartest little pet out of all of them. That's probably why this isn't a thing unfortunately.

 

[N64Controller]

Bereavement leaves in many companies are fucked up for anything that's not like your SO or your child. There are even pl,aces that give you more time if you're married.

When you lose someone that is important to you to the point where it affects your work and your performance, I don't see why the company should have a look at the link or who that person was to you from an "official" perspective. Same thing goes for pets.

It's not like people exagerate on these things. Even if someone somehow takes advantage of it once or twice, who cares? I prefer people who actually need it to get the time they need instead of restricting everything because some asshole with 15 grandpas is going to try to take advantage of a fucking bereavement leave ...

 

[GK86]

There should be. As people have stated, pets are a member of the family.

When I had to put down my dog, I cried so much that day and was a wreck for the rest of the week. Didn't get any better coming home from work and not having a dog jump on you.

 

[Psamtik]

My cat's been dead for a decade, and I still can't bring myself to get another, but grief is complex and individual. Pets differ from humans inasmuch as, outside of parrots and turtles, they really don't live very long, but knowing that going in doesn't necessarily make their deaths any easier.

 

[DevilMayGuy]

I think it'd be great if pet bereavement leave became mainstream. The trauma is real, pets are family. Historically I've had to just take PTO when the worst happens, but it would be great to have a day or two on the books. It's hard to get anything productive done the day after losing a pet.

 

[machtia]

I came to work early after finding out my dog had days to live. My boss made me go home immediately and said to take as much time as needed.

 

[Cantaim]

I need the day off when my dogs die. Straight up you are not getting any work from me I will be a mess.

 

[nihilence]

My last company offered it and I sadly had to use it. But it was much appreciated and needed. They allocated 1 day a year.

 

[Samenamenick]

Ours is 3 days for immediate family only. I kinda get it, as folks would take advantage otherwise (my great great uncle died!)

That said, it should be case by case sometimes. Your manager should (generally speaking) be able to see who was and wasn't important to you, vs crying wolf for paid days off for every single death you have to endure. Of course that's assuming you have sympathetic management.

My mom died in Jan. They even gave me a fourth day, as I had to deal with everything as only child n dad dead 20 years prior. She left a cat, 17 yrs old. I saw it as my duty to keep her alive, as I wasn't able to do it for mom. Cat died in June. They gave me a paid day, again, knowing the situation. At my last job, they gave me a week for my brother, and sent the largest flower bouquet (prob $300-400) at the wake. But, they loved me, and I loved them.

So ultimately, I'm not sure I'd advocate for official bereavement for every single death of someone/thing you know, as understandably it would open things up for abuse. Hopefully your management is understanding.

Edit- as I understand it, bereavement time off is more for having time to do things (planning, attending wakes/funerals etc) than it is for crying in bed etc. There is obviously less of that to do with a pet in most cases.

 

[THEVOID]

I think it should be a thing, but it'll never happen mainstream. Which is sad because they are every bit as family as any human. I'd do anything for my kitties.

 

[GeoGonzo]

Pets absolutely are like family but I think bereavement leave is already a flawed system (For example, I got none for the loss of one of my best friends because they weren't family). What employees need is more freedom to take time off with little or no notice.

 

[mhayes86]

It would be a great to have as a pet owner. My wife and I had a dog pass away last year that hit us really hard, but it happened on a Thursday night which gave me the weekend to try and mourn without taking days off work. I ended up needing a couple extra days anyway because it was so difficult.

It was particularly worrisome last year with using PTO because there was still uncertainty on how to handle a positive covid case. One of the plans was requiring you to use two weeks of PTO to quarantine. Fortunately it didn't come to that.

 

[Servbot24]

Companies should just offer unlimited PTO so that you can use your days for whatever purposes you see fit. Would be much more simple.

 

[Alric]

As a manager I've taken time off, and given it for pets passing. It seriously hits me harder than almost anything else. They are family, the closest kind.

 

[Fletcher]

Just had to put my dog down a few weeks ago. It was a tough few days leading up to it and a tough few days afterwards. Would get hit with a wave of emotion just thinking about those last few seconds with her. Would've loved if I could've just had a day or two to myself.

 

[YozoraXV]

I feel it could be abused.

Losing a cat or a dog is devastating but losing something like a goldfish doesn't warrant a day off.

 

[Dannepannepuff]

No. I also oppose maternal/paternal leave for puppies, kittens and so on. But I have no problem with people taking vacation or whatever you have off for it.

 

[Seirith]

I've taken a day or two off after the death of my pets, usually just as calling in "sick" or saying it's personal. Non pet people would never understand needing a day off for the death of a pet. After the death of a pet I would be useless at work for that day so no point in me being there unless I totally had to.

Many years ago, when I was working for someone else my parents were at my house starting to get a garage sale ready we were having that weekend. Around 1pm I got a panicked call from my mom, my dad hadn't shut the door all the way and 2 of my indoor only cats were outside and they could not find 1 or get the other one who hated everyone but me and my husband in. I immediately went in to my boss and told him I needed to go home and why. I then called my husband and he left work too. We both luckily had understanding bosses and were able to get both cats inside safely.

On the flip side, during Covid my husband was working in a group home when his day program was shut down and I had to rush our cat with heart fialure to emergency and he was not allowed to leave. He ended up not being able to be there when I put him to sleep. I was also to call my mom and she met me there just in time so I didn't have to do it alone. It was awful to not have him be able to be there with me and for him to not be able to say goodbye.

I think all jobs should offer paid time off for things like that-pet dying, friend dying, etc.

 

[Seirith]

I feel it could be abused.

Losing a cat or a dog is devastating but losing something like a goldfish doesn't warrant a day off.

Click to shrink...

In your opinion maybe but to someone else losing a fish or other small animals may be devastating. I've cried and felt horrible after the death of my rats.

 

[finfinfin]

By law pets are property. Until *that* changes then I'd never expect a company to care, until then you just gotta hope your boss is understanding. Or lie.

Click to shrink...

All companies care about is property, so it's actually more likely they'd care about an animal than a human family member.

It's your property, so not very likely, but they may develop some empathy if it had some kind of capital value.

 

[Faenix1]

All companies care about is property, so it's actually more likely they'd care about an animal than a human family member.

It's your property, so not very likely, but they may develop some empathy if it had some kind of capital value.

Click to shrink...

Companies have policies on if your immediate family dies. I've yet to see one that doesn't. Unless you have a pet loving boss who understands, it's unlikely most will care.

 

[CasuallyDressed]

It sucks that it isn't recognised, and it sucks even more that people are generally way more sympathetic when it's a dog, but sort of scoff at you when it's a cat. Like they're somehow lesser.

 

[Deleted member 9241]

Paid time off for the death of a pet or just excused time away from your job?

 

[breakdancing duck]

Take a sick day? If you typically have solid attendance no one should question it.

 

[Mcfrank]

Just take a sick day and don't tell them why if you think it would be a problem.

 

[Unrivaled]

I know this may sound insensitive but pets are not close to the same thing as family or friends.

I have lost my mom and a close friend before. Have also lost several pets over my lifetime. It really is not the same thing at all.